


A Lovely Night

by Peter164



Series: Alternate Universe [15]
Category: Thomas Sanders, Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Age Play, Alexithymia, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Human, BDSM, Body Image, Dad Morality, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Smut, Headaches & Migraines, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Master/Pet, Non-Sexual Age Play, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Esteem Issues, Teacher Logan, Theater Kid Roman, Thomas isn't here but he needs to be a character so it shows up the right way
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2018-04-15
Packaged: 2018-10-23 16:29:06
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 51
Words: 90,111
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10723020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Peter164/pseuds/Peter164
Summary: Virgil has a boyfriend, a dramatic, over the top, self absorbed boyfriend. But his dad doesn't know. He asks for some help from a trusted adult. This trusted adult just happens to be his teacher. But it seems that there always has to be a secret boyfriend in the family when his dad starts dating.(Any potential triggers with be listed in the chapter summary or the beginning notes. I will do my very best to keep it trigger free, but there still might be some minor things here and there. The smutty chapters will be labeled if you want to sit out for it. The rest of the story is G-T.)





	1. Virgil

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Saunders is a variation of the name Sanders, so that's why that is. I also learned that Sanders means "helper of mankind" and Thomas is living up to his family name.
> 
> [This](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8i2tq_vk84) is where I got the idea for this chapter.

Roman was nuzzled into his neck making Wirgil giggle. Roman proceeded to press a sloppy kiss against his cheek.

"God, stop. You two are so sweet it's disgusting. You'll end up rotting the teeth out of my head." Ben glared at them. Roman stuck his tongue out at him and pulled Virgil closer to him. The bell rang loudly signaling that lunch was over. The three grabbed their bags and walked together towards room 113. Decorated with the classic teacher posters of quotes next to pictures of Einstein and drawings made by students. The only thing out of place for a science classroom was the dozens of poems covering the walls. The teacher sat at his desk, nose buried in a murder mystery novel. The three friends were the first students in the class, as usual and Virgil left the little group to talk with the teacher. He cleared his throat to get his attention. He looked up and smiled at his student.

"Do you need anything, Virgil?" He asked, placing a bookmark in his book.

"Actually, I was wondering if you could help me with something." He started, his heart was beating out of his chest.

"That would depend on what that something would be." He leaned forward.

"So, it's not a big secret that I'm gay. And that's why I'm coming to you for help, because you're also gay. But my dad doesn't exactly know that yet, and I'm sure he'll be cool with it and everything, but I'm still really anxious about telling him and I was wondering if you could maybe help me a little." Virgil asked quiety, he didn't want the others to hear his conversation.

"What can I do?" Mr. Sanders asked.

"If you could ask him to come in or something and just tell him. I can do all the explaining, but I can't be the one to tell him I don't want to see his initial reaction. You can tell him about Roman, I don't care. And like I said, I can't imagine a bad word coming out of his mouth so I can't imagine anything bad would happen, I just can't do it myself and I don't know how much longer I can lie to him." Virgil explained, Mr. Sanders turned to his computer and started typing.

"I'll sent him an email right now." He promised.

"Thank you so much, you have no idea how much this means to me." Virgil grinned, "He works every other day, today is a work day." 

"Don't worry about a single thing. Today's an easy day for you guys, you can relax." He promised. Virgil nodded and thanked him one more time before sitting back down. More students had trickled into the classroom and were goofing off before the bell rang. Roman sat on Virgil's desk and told him all about his first professional audition. The cast list was coming out today and he was terrified of the results. The bell rang and everyone quietly found a seat, Mr. Sanders stood up and explained what they were doing for the day.

"There's a lot of stress on you guys lately, lots of quizzing in my classes, sporting events, theater productions, Roman I heard was auditioning for a local production, I know many of you are under a lot of pressure day to day, and because of this we're having a slow day. I'll be playing Mythbusters up at the front, of course I have coloring pages on the back counter along with colored pencils. This time can be used for homework in other classes, catching up on reading or sleep, whatever you need to do. You can sit wherever you want, you can listen to music, you can sit in the hall as long as you follow the rules I have set out for you. I'll be at my desk if you need me for anything at all." He started the show and turned off the lights at the front of the class, leaving the back half of the classroom lit for those who needed it. Everyone assumed their positions and began the class. Roman muzzled as close to Virgil as he could with a binder in his hands.

Virgil was helping him with his math as a reward for helping his A in English. Virgil was explaining quadratics to him for what must be the hundredth time. Half the class was spent working on his homework, and they only got about two thirds of it done. Roman made him promise to help him more tonight.

"Roman, it's hard to help with math over the phone. You know that." Virgil sighed.

"Then come over. Make something up and sneak over." Roman suggested.

"Roman, I-"

"Please? I need help and you're the best tutor I've ever had." He pouted and grabbed at Virgil's hands, "Please?"

"Alright fine. I'll figure something out, but this is an innocent study session. Don't try anything while I'm there." Virgil told him.

"Well, I might need a bit of an incentive, but nothing we would need to close the door for. I promise." Roman smiled, Virgil rolled his eyes.

They started working on Virgil's English homework together. Poetry, the bane of his existence. He was the stereotypical emo kid in every way except one, he hated poetry with a firey passion. It didn't make sense, the flowery language laced with metaphor was pretentious and difficult to understand. It was hard to read and hard to write, and now he had to do both. Roman tried to help him. They struggled through the reading he had to do, only to get stuck on the writing.

"I have an idea. Think of something you're emotional about, whether it's happy, or sad, or angry, or afraid, whatever. As long as you have very passionate emotions toward that thing." Roman pulled out a sheet of paper and scribbled a title at the top, "Make a list of everything you think of, big or small. Then when you come over, I'll help you with the next step. Okay?"

"As long as it gets me a good grade." Virgil said.

~*~

Virgil's heart raced. He'd sent a text to his dad that he'd be at a friend's to study and he shouldn't worry if he wasn't home when he got off work. His dad just said Ok, with a string of emojis attached. Of course, he'd still never actually been to Roman's house beyond those few times he picked him up for a date, and that hardly counted. He'd met his parents, both were just as big as Roman was. And they both adored Virgil, but this was new. He knocked on the door. 

Roman greeted him with a bear hug. He scooped him up and carried him upstairs, making Virgil blush. Roman said hello to his parents who were sitting on the couch watching a movie. His mother reminded him where condoms were and Roman rolled his eyes. He placed Virgil on the bed before plopping down himself. 

Roman's room was tidy, but cluttered. Theater posters and polaroid pictures adorned the walls. He had a bookcase, not full of books, but full of knick knacks. Stuffed animals, glass figurines, homemade flower crowns, a small, pink jewelry box sat on one of the shelves. Stacks of music boxes surrounded it. A stack of old scripts sat on the lowest shelf. His white dresser was decorated with Barbie dolls and more stuffed animals. Virgil drank everything in with so much love. 

Roman opened his backpack and pulled out his math. Virgil had to re-explain it all and show him how to do all the equations. It took another full hour before they managed to get through the last of his homework. When they finished, Virgil showed him the list of things he was emotional about. Roman showed him how he could combine certain things on his list so they had less to go through. Virgil crossed out ideas he didn't like until he was left with just a few. He had Roman, himself, his single dad, and makeup. 

"Okay, so that we have this, let's start with the first. What do you think of when you think about me?" Roman said, "Whatever emotions that might come up, things you like, things you dislike, anything."

"I think about how obnoxious you can be, your acting, red, your hair, flowers, Disney, singing, listening to you laugh, how overconfident you are sometimes, delusions of grandeur, how protective you are, how easily you get jealous, gold, the fact that I hate how much I love you." Virgil listed off. There were a few other things that came to mind, but he figured they might not be school appropriate, or anything besides fantasizing appropriate for that matter. Roman nodded, he was scribbling down everything that Virgil was saying. When he was done, he quickly pecked Virgil on the lips.

"I love you too, princess. Can you do the same thing with yourself please?" Roman asked. Virgil blushed, he held himself to very low standards.

"Uhm, black, sad, angry," He was listing much slower and this time, "Hate, hurting-"

Roman tackled him and kissed him to shut him up. He held his cheeks in his hands when he pulled away.

"None of that, my dear. You deserve nothing but happy thoughts." He sat up and scratched Virgil's name off the list, "You only get to write poetry about yourself if it's happy poetry, okay?"

"Okay." Virgil smiled.

"Good." Roman kissed him one more time, "Now, let's try the next one, princess. Your dad."

Roman took the notebook he was writing in and placed in on Virgil's chest, essentially pinning him down. Roman was perched on his lap, ready to write.

"Happy, oblivious, positive, baby blue, Winnie-the-Pooh, sky, sun, puppies, butterflies, hugs, laughing, stupid jokes, angel wings, a little bit stupid, but endearing all the same, overwhelming amounts of love." Virgil said, Roman looked up from his paper to look at his boyfriend.

"He sounds like such a wonderful person, why won't you let me meet him?" Roman pouted.

"I told you, I'm not out yet and you can't go five minutes without touching me. That's not a problem that friends have, Roman." Virgil explained.

"Hurry up and come out so I can meet the father of my precious princess." Roman smiled, "Now let's move on to makeup."

"Okay. Peaceful, fun, pretty, relaxing, making outsides match insides, releasing feelings, enjoyable, it let's me show what I feel, it let's me get my hands all over your pretty face, making people feel more confidant, shields. When I do makeup it makes me feel like I'm letting go of bad feelings." He said. Roman hummed, fingers swirling over his chest around the notebook, "What?"

"You're so pretty, you know that?" Roman bit his lip.

"I'm not really, but thank you." He laughed. Roman kissed him.

"You are." He repeated, "And now that everything is written down, you can pick a topic and turn those thoughts and feelings into lines and stanzas. Make it extra flowery and annoying just for me, okay."

"Okay." Virgil agreed with a small smile.


	2. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patton meets Logan

Patton loved his not so little boy with all his heart. So when he opened his email to find a message from his teacher, he nearly had a heart attack. He agreed to meet up as soon as he had the chance. And now was meeting day. He said goodbye to his son and hurried over, consciously trying not to speed. He walked inside the building and found the room after a few minutes of wandering around, he took a deep breath and entered. A man sat at the desk with his nose buried between the pages of a book. When Patton closed the door behind him, he looked up. He smiled and placed a sticky note on the page and closed the book.

"Hello, I'm Logan Sanders, your son's teacher." He shook Patton's hand and gestured for him to sit down.

"Patton Saunders. Is everything okay? I don't want my little guy upset at all." Patton tried his best not to show his anxiety.

"Everything is fine, I promise. In fact this meeting is more because your son wanted me to talk with you instead of doing so himself. He said he had no doubt in his mind that you would even care, but for his own mental well being he asked me to share this with you." Logan explained.

"Okay?" Patton wasn't entirely sure what this would be about.

"Trust me, his nervousness is not without cause. There's plenty of horror stories, a lot of which I have seen or actually experienced myself." Logan started. Patton leaned forward, "Virgil is gay."

"Is he alright? He's not getting bullied about it is he?" Patton was still worried. He didn't want a single thing hurting his baby.

"No actually, quite the opposite. He has a boyfriend, and trust me when I say he will keep every bad word away from Virgil's ears. They're both in my class together and he brings out the absolute best in him. Although they do get in some pretty heated arguments from time to time. I still don't quite know why they were debating whether Elsa or Anna was better, but they were certainly passionate about the subject." Logan shrugged. 

"Why didn't he tell me?" Patton felt like he'd been punched in the gut. The light of his life hadn't even bothered to tell him that he found someone he loved.

"Because he was scared. I told you, he honestly thought you wouldn't mind in the slightest. But just because someone doesn't mind gay people and relationships doesn't mean that they'll be accepting of someone so close to them being gay. I know that better than most." Logan said, "He's a sensitive kid, and he looks up to you a lot. He didn't want to be rejected by you."

"But I would never do anything to hurt him." He shook his head, "And why do you keep talking like you've gone through this?"

"Because I have. I am the only openly gay teacher at this school, that is if I'm not forgetting anyone that I don't care about. I remember my mom being so nice to our gay neighbors, and having her lesbian friends come over for parties and whatnot, and I can remember sobbing one night and her telling me that she would love me unconditionally. One day she ended up going through my room while I was at school and finding some rather incriminating evidence, she told me that I was broken and wrong, that she would never accept me until I started liking girls again. So I think he had a fair reason for being afraid, even if you would never do or say anything negative around or about your child." Logan explained. Patton was broken hearted after hearing his story. He was just about to walk over to the other side of the desk and scoop him up and snuggle with him like a kitten. He wanted to wrap him up with layers and layers of blankets and make him cookies made of love and rainbows and make sure he was never ever sad again. 

"I'm so sorry." And he was. He felt like crying for this poor man he just met ten minutes ago. 

"She came around, eventually. But still. Anyway, enough of my sob story." Logan smiled, but he still looked sad.

"What's his boyfriend like?" Patton asked.

"Well, his name is Roman. He's a theater kid, especially fond of musicals, he has so much talent contained in such a small space, he's honestly incredible. He has a very large personality, he likes being the center of attention, and he's really good at getting there, and he adores Virgil and calls him princess, honestly it's the most precious relationship I've seen in a very long time." Logan chuckled to himself. Patton smiled. 

"Would you look at that. We're both wearing glasses." Patton suddenly realized. Logan just blinked.

"Yes we are. We have both been wearing very similar glasses this entire time." Logan nodded slowly. Patton just sat with a stupid grin on his face, it suddenly dawned on him how pretty the other one was.

"This is going to sound like a really weird thing to ask, especially because of the conversation we've been having, but I'm going to ask anyway. Do you want to go out sometime? With me, I mean, next Saturday." Patton tilted his head.

"Like a date?" Logan asked. Patton nodded, "Uhm, well I didn't think you'd be-"

"Neither did I. I don't really care either. I just know that you're pretty, and I like listening to you talk with big words, and I think that I would like to do more of that thing. I'm wrong about a lot of things, but I'm pretty sure dates are for that." Patton grinned. Logan blushed.

"Oh, okay. Sure, sounds good. I'll give you my phone number so you can contact me." Logan scrambled for a pen and slip of paper, scribbling down his number and handing it to Patton, "But, I should be going. My cousin is making me go dress shopping with her, although I don't really understand why. Her only explanation was 'You're the gay cousin.' I don't know what that has to do with me shopping with her."

"There's a stereotype about gay men being exceptionally fashionable." Patton explained. Logan looked like he just had an epiphany.

"That would be why I keep getting requests like that, and why they are always so disappointed when I'm not helpful. I feel like I must apologize, most of my time is spent in books so I'm not very well versed in anything that isn't literary." 

"You don't need to worry about it. I get stuff wrong all the time. It took an embarrassing amount of time for me to learn what the word adultery meant." Patton comforted.

~*~

Patton walked up to Virgil's room and opened the door. 

"When do I get to meet Roman?" He asked with a grin. Virgil blushed and offered to call him so they could discuss it, he put the call on speaker phone. The phone rang twice before someone picked up.

"Virgil, I'm so happy you called. I just checked the cast list and guess who not only got cast as the wolf, but also Prince Charming." Roman announced. Virgil smiled.

"Congratulations, but you already basically are Prince Charming. You hardly have to act at all." Virgil told him.

"Why, thank you." He answered.

"Yep. Big, loud, full of himself. That's you in three words." Virgil said.

"Excuse me, that's five words. You cheater." Roman said.

"Whatever. Anyway, you're on speaker with my dad and-"

"He knows now?"

"You're good to go. And it seems all your dreams are coming true today, Sir Sing-A-Lot. He wants to meet you." Virgil said, he covered the speaker of the phone before the screaming happened. Virgil rolled his eyes and waited for it to stop before uncovering the speaker. 

"How does this Friday work?" Roman asked, now obviously even more excited.

"I'll cook dinner. Be here at 5?" Patton asked.

"Absolutely." Roman sounded so enthusiastic, "I have to go, Mom's taking me for ice cream to celebrate me getting the part I wanted. Love you."

He hung up. Patton and Virgil looked at each other and laughed. Virgil looked happier than he did before the conversation, like he was glowing a little. Patton smiled and enveloped his son in a hug. Virgil buried his face in his father's shoulder. Virgil was calm for once, Patton could feel his heart beating slow and steady instead of the quick and uneven pace it usually had, like a rabbit running from a dog. Everything was how it should be. Patton pulled away, still holding tightly to his shoulders.

"Any other secrets I should know about?" He asked.

"Whenever I said I was going to see a friend or anything like that, I was going to see Roman." Virgil bit his lip. Patton laughed.

"I figured that out, kiddo. What's he going to be in?"

"Into the Woods. His first professional play he's ever even tried out for. He's really proud of himself." Virgil said with a small smile, "He worked so hard and stressed over it for days before, and he did it. I'm really happy for him."

"I'd be worried if you weren't." Patton loved him so much, "You wanna order pizza and watch cartoons like we did when you were a kid?" 

Virgil nodded. They walked downstairs together and turned on the tv. Virgil was responsible for finding something to watch while Patton ordered their food.


	3. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meet the parents (or just dad).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: There is talk about shots in this chapter, everyone should be fine. I mean, I could handle this story (based off of an actual story that happened to someone in my family at a very young age who will not be disclosed, he was the screaming child) and I almost cried/vomited/passed out because my cousin was getting her blood drawn in the same room that I happened to be in. There is also a mild panic attack, but again, everyone should be alright. Still, if you're sensitive, be aware.

He knocked on the door, heart pounding with excitement. Virgil opened it with a smile. Roman wrapped his arms around his waist and hugged him so tightly he lifted him off the ground. Virgil squealed and clung to Roman's neck to keep from falling or being dropped. Roman set him back down and stepped inside, carefully kissing his cheek. A man that looked remarkably like Virgil walked up with a huge grin and shook his hand. 

"Hello, I'm Patton. You must be Roman." He radiated peace and calm. Roman felt so much happier just being next to the man. Such a stark contrast to his eyeliner wearing, permanently dressed for his own funeral son. No wonder he gravitated toward Roman so much, why he claimed to relax around him. They had the same infectious, optimistic energy. 

"I brought flowers. I would've also made dessert, but I've barely mastered microwave popcorn and frankly I'm not fond of storebought." Roman handed him the bouquet of multicolored daisies. 

"Oh, what a sweetheart. Go sit at the table, dinner's almost ready." Patton fawned over him. Virgil slumped in the chair next to him. The flowers ended up in a vase of water. Patton brought food over from the kitchen a few minutes later and sat in the last open spot, letting the two boys dish their own food, "So, I believe Virgil told me you're in Into the Woods?"

"Yes, I am. I'll be the Wolf and Prince Charming." He nodded, taking a bite of food.

"I'm sorry, I don't know much about theater. What would that be about?" He asked.

"It's a kind of fairy tale play. It's about a baker and his wife not being able to have kids because of a curse. They go on a quest to find some items to break the curse so they can have a baby. On the way they meet Jack from Jack and the Beanstalk, Red Riding Hood, Rapunzel, and Cinderella. I'll play the wolf that Red Riding Hood meets on her way to her grandmother's and Cinderella's prince." Roman explained.

"And you get to sing the pedophile song." Virgil said quietly, but deliberately.

"It's not a pedophile song." He scolded.

"Of course it's not." Virgil said sarcastically, "Granted you do also get to sing Agony, which is the best song in the entire musical. And I'm pretty sure any musical."

"I cannot argue with that, as much as I want to." Roman knew that every argument he could make against it was also an argument for why it was Virgil's favorite. Patton sat watching their conversation with such fondness, "So what do you do for a living, Mr. Saunders?"

"Call me Patton. I'm what's called a pediatric primary care nurse practitioner. That's a really big name for something that just means I give kids check ups and shots and stuff." Patton shrugged, still smiling, "Speaking of which, I had this family come in yesterday with 7 kids. Virgil, you know the one, they're in all the time, the mom is pregnant again. So they came in today because one of them got strep and they all come in so they don't have to come in multiple times if another kid gets it. We were giving them all their penicillin shots, and the first kid did great. He got it done and over with and he was outside picking out his sticker while we worked on the next kid. And this kid must've been terrified of shots or something, because he was literally kicking and screaming. It was me, his mom, another nurse, and a doctor all holding him down trying to give him this shot, I'm pretty sure he bit the doctor. We're all holding him down trying to give him his antibiotics and all of a sudden a third nurse comes running in the door and tells us that the first kid passed out. It must've taken us an hour just to give those two kids their shots, and one of them passed out."

Both Virgil and Roman were trying very hard not to laugh. Patton was grinning again.

"That was why you were so tired last night wasn't it?" Virgil asked, Patton nodded. 

They finished eating, making polite conversation and were all sitting around the table, still too lazy to get up. Virgil stood up, very suddenly, muttered a "please excuse me" under his breath. He hurried away. Roman tried not to chase him as fast as he could so he could help calm him down. He knew exactly what was going on, and Virgil never got through it very well on his own. He asked where his room was, or a bathroom, and Patton told him. Roman didn't have enough time to explain what he was doing before he had left the table, leaving Patton halfway through his sentence. He found the bathroom door shut and locked, he knocked quietly.

"Princess, can I come in? I just want to make sure you're okay." Roman said through the wood of the door. Virgil opened it and pulled him inside. Roman held him against his chest, feeling his racing heart and rapid breathing. Virgil's shaking hands clung to Roman's shirt. Roman just ran his fingers through his hair and kissed the top of his head, "Can you tell me what's wrong?"

Virgil shook his head vigorously against Roman's chest. Roman quietly sang to Virgil, just picking the first song to come to mind that he knew well. That song happened to be what was playing when he drove over, being the dedicated Halsey fan that he was it happened to be Colors. He sang about blue, and gray, and love, and heartbreak, and he felt Virgil relaxing in his arms. 

"Are you ready to go back out?" Roman asked, Virgil shook his head, "Do you want another song?" Virgil nodded.

Roman picked another song he knew off the top of his head. This time it happened to be Pity Party. A much angier song, about tears, and fire, and abandonment. But Virgil gobbled it up anyway. Roman watched him close his eyes and bury his nose in his chest, he gently kissed his hair one more time when he finished the song and repeated his question. Virgil nodded.

"I love you so much, princess. You're such a strong little one." He smiled down. He opened the door and walked with him back out to the table. Virgil sat down quietly, Roman continued watching for any red flags he could pick upon, staying standing up. His hands were still and steady, his chest rose and fell like normal, his eyes didn't dart around the room, looking for a way out, he was alright. Patton, now standing, looked at the two, trying to decide what to think of what just happened, "I do apologize, but I get worried about him. I wanted to make sure he was okay, that's all."

"You were gone for nearly 10 minutes." He pointed out. Roman looked at Virgil to see if he wanted to share.

"I had another attack. Roman was helping me calm down." Virgil explained, "He's the one who helps whenever it happens at school. He sings songs and gives me hugs and whatever else he thinks will help."

"That's so cute." Patton walked over and gave Roman a bear hug, "Thank you so much for helping my little guy out. He needs it so much. You're so precious."

He continued babbling and Roman gave a questioning look to Virgil, who shrugged. When Patton let go, he asked if they wanted to watch a movie. Roman and Virgil both agreed, feeling like they still wanted something to do. They sat down together, side by side, and picked out a movie together. Settling on Moana, no one had to know he'd seen it more times than he could count already. Through the whole movie, Virgil was snuggling more and more into Roman. Eventually they had to readjust their position so Virgil was lying between his legs with his head on his chest. Roman used the opportunity to play with Virgil's hair. Combing through it, twisting it through his fingers, brushing it back, anything his hands wanted to do to the perfect head of hair in front of him. Somewhere between Tamatoa's Shiny song and their first battle with Te Kā Roman looked down and realized his princess had fallen asleep. He glanced over at Patton to see if he had noticed. He saw him sneakily putting his phone in his lap like he was pretending he wasn't about to take a picture.

Roman looked back away and focused on the warm weight of Virgil laying on top of him. He loved this boy so much, more than he loved just about anything. Nothing was allowed to hurt him ever, not even a negative word was allowed to reach his ears. He was only allowed to have new stuffed animals and pretty things, to be told how loved he was. He would never need to pout or whine because Roman would make sure that every need was met before Virgil even knew he wanted anything. Roman's job was to spoil him in every possible way so Virgil would never know what it felt like to need, he had enough on his plate already. Depression, panic disorder, social anxiety, insomnia, and that was only what Roman knew about. Who knows what else might be bothering him. Most days he had to make sure he ate at all, bring him food, watch him eat it, do his best to make sure it stayed in him. Roman wanted to lighten his load as much as he possibly could, even if it wasn't much in the long run. He'd do whatever it took. 

The movie ended and Roman thought it would be best if he took Virgil to bed. He moved so he could stand up, trying his best to keep Virgil as still as possible. His efforts were in vain, because Virgil groaned quietly as soon as he moved. He opened his eyes and looked up sleepily at Roman, his heart skipped a beat.

"Hey, I was just going to take you upstairs, okay? Put you to bed." He explained in a voice just above a whisper.

"No, I'm okay. I can-"

"You're going to bed. Can you let me stand up, princess?" He asked. Virgil moved so he could get up. Roman scooped him up like the princess he was and started for the stairs.

"Stay here." Virgil insisted, still half asleep.

"Sweetheart, I can't. I gotta go back home." He said.

"Why?" Patton, of all people, asked. Roman didn't quite know how to respond, "If he wants you to stay the night then I don't see a problem with it. He's already asleep so I can't imagine anything worrying happening. And you've been nothing but sweet to both of us, stay the night if you want."

"Please stay." Virgil nuzzled into his chest. Roman felt his judgment getting weaker, he bit his lip in indecision.

"I didn't bring anything-"

"We have stuff." Patton shrugged. 

"If you're absolutely sure it's alright." Roman found himself agreeing before he could yell at himself. 

"As long as I still get to say goodnight to my boy." He shrugged. Roman invited him over, Patton smoothed his hair down and said goodnight quietly. Roman carried his princess up the stairs into his room, gently placing him on the bed.

"Third drawer has sweatpants in it." Virgil said sleepily, "Don't know if I gotta shirt that'll fit you though."

"Is it alright if I go without then?" Roman asked. Virgil nodded and wrapped his arms around his waist, trying to pull him into bed, "Hey, princess, I need to get changed. Don't worry, I'll be there in just a moment." 

Virgil whined when he left. He changed into a pair of Virgil's sweatpants and pulled his shirt off. He tossed a pair to Virgil, who was already drifting off again. Once they were both changed, Roman pulled the covers up to Virgil's chin and climbed into the bed next to him. Virgil curled up beside him and began snoring gently right away. Roman kissed his forehead before closing his eyes and falling asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I have gotten myself into a bit of a pickle and would love your guys' help to get me out. I have Logicality's (hopefully that's the right one, I get the Logan ship names confused with each other) first date planned out, and incredibly kinky smut planned. That's it, nothing in the middle. So if there's anything you'd like to see between these two (or at all), I would be so incredibly thankful.
> 
> And if you don't know anything about Into the Woods and are greatly confused, these are the two songs mentioned (Note that I am including both the film and theater versions because I think that the film did a good job with these two songs):  
> [Hello, Little Girl (film version)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZ8igP3YKLw)  
> [Hello, Little Girl (theater version)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8NAuqQ-h7vA)  
> [Agony (film version/best thing you will ever watch)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YmixlJ79ZF0)  
> [Agony (theater version)](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFgMowOwek0)
> 
> And the songs that Roman sings to Anxiety are:  
> [Colors](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JGulAZnnTKA) (The video is a little weird, but it's still a good song. Don't judge based on the video.)  
> [Pity Party](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bAPlojfgO0)


	4. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Date night? (Does it count as date night if it's not at night?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Valerie might be a bit OOC, but she's only been in a few vines and his Valentine's video. Because of that fact, I think I can be a little creative.

Logan didn't know what he was doing. He didn't know how to dress, how to keep up a conversation, how to really do anything one is expected to do during courtship. He was so lost, he came to the conclusion that he needed some help from someone who excelled at this. His cousin, Valerie. He was currently trying to pick out an outfit, something that he absolutely dreaded. They'd found a shirt, a simple t shirt-hoodie combination that Valerie had deemed flattering. They'd gotten stuck on what pants he needed to wear. Valerie was so specific on what pants she thought he needed to wear. Something warm, something comfortable, but still made his legs and butt look amazing.

"Why does it need to do that?" He asked when she explained the rules.

"Because you need to show yourself off a little, make him want you." She said.

"I'm not trying to seduce the man, Valerie, just see what happens when we're put in a romantic setting together. Simple. And you're the one who always says looks don't matter." He pointed out.

"True, but you should still dress a little bit sexier than you normally do. Like an extra credit questions on tests, you'll be fine without it but it doesn't hurt to give it a try anyway." She gave him an analogy, something Logan could understand, "Besides, your ass is fantastic. Any sane human being would want to show it off at every opportunity."

"Alright, fine. I'll show him my ass." Logan rolled his eyes, throwing up his hands in defeat, "Any idea how to start a conversation with him?"

"Make an observation. You can do that, right?" She asked as Logan dug through his drawers, pulling out the fitted pairs of pants. 

"I would hope so." He shrugged. He set the pile on the bed next to her. She picked out a pair of skintight, black, leather pants and held them up.

"Now why on earth do you own these?" She asked.

"Good question." He replied, "I don't know. I don't remember purchasing them, or wearing them, or wanting them. They're here now though." 

"I see." She set them down, "Maybe not for a first date. Anyway, if you want to start talking tell him something you like about him, he has really pretty eyes, you like what he did with his hair, you like the way that shirt looks. Or tell him something that's happening to you, the sky is really pretty tonight, you love the song that's playing, it's a bit chilly. Easy, just make sure it's positive, you don't want to go ranting about everything that bothers you."

Logan nodded. He could do this, he could make a good impression, he wouldn't screw it up this time. Valerie tossed him the pair of pants that she decided he should wear. She continued giving him advice, don't check your phone too much, be nice, impress him, but don't act like you're trying to impress him. So much was getting stuffed into his head that he was starting to feel dizzy with information, why were people so hard? Why couldn't it just be like books, or equations, or machines? Simple, easy, always the same every single time. People were random, and random was something Logan couldn't work with. He pulled his pants on and started putting on his shoes when the doorbell rang. Logan frantically checked his phone for the time. It was 15 passed the discussed time of 3. Patton was late and Logan was just barely ready. He felt ashamed of himself. Valerie pat his head and stood up to answer the door for him. Logan heard quiet chatter as he finished getting his shoes on and stuffing his phone and wallet in his pocket. Patton stood in the doorway, grinned and nodding at her conversation. He saw Logan walking over and his face lit up, making him blush. 

"You ready to go?" Patton asked, Logan nodded and stepped outside with a quiet "have fun" from Valerie. Patton walked with him out to his car, he insisted on driving. He opened Logan's door, much to his surprise. He sat down quietly and watched as Patton climbed into the driver's seat. It suddenly dawned on him how much older Patton must be than him, that is unless he became a father when he was 11. He strangely liked the idea of the age gap, something he never thought he would enjoy before. He went against his better judgement and decided to ask.

"How old do you think I am?" Patton smirked.

"Well you look to be around my age, maybe a bit older. But I would guess late 30's or early 40's due to you having a teenage son." He stated, trying to be polite and honest at the same time. Morgan shook his head.

"I'm 36. So not too far off. But you have to answer the same question now." He pointed out with a smile.

"I'll be 28 next month." He said, nearly a 10 year gap between them. Logan had to keep this one, falling more and more in love with that idea. Patton squeaked, Logan was a little shocked at his reaction. And that meant that he had Virgil when he was 19, Logan wondered what the story behind that was, but he refused to ask another personal, possibly sad question.

"You're such a small little baby!" He grinned, "Don't worry, I'll take extra good care of you." 

Logan blushed at the thought. He always thought himself to be quite independent, and yet he wanted this man to take care of him. He wanted to be snuggled when he was sick, and told what to do, and given presents like a child. He came quickly to a conclusion that almost frightened him, he always thought that _those_ kinds of people were a little odd at best, and yet he wanted it more than ever. He put the thought out of his mind and focused on making sure he got what he wanted.

"So where are we going. You said you had plans." Logan asked, biting his lip.

"First, I thought we could get some frozen yogurt, then an aquarium?" He said. Logan nodded, he could handle that. It was just fish and frozen dessert, he could make it. Patton turned the key and the radio started and Fall Out Boy was very loudly singing about "the stench of summer sex", Patton groaned and picked up an iPhone. He stopped the music and handed it to Logan, "It's my old phone, it stopped making phone calls. Now we just use it for music. Virgil must've picked last time. Pick something out."

Logan scrolled through the massive collection of music. Patton adjusted the volume while Logan chose. He settled on the Beatles. Patton smiled at his choice and started driving.

~*~

Patton was already sitting down, Logan was getting spoons and napkins for them. He turned and watching Patton's eyes dart up to his face, meaning they weren't already watching his face, but he was watching him. There was really only one thing that Patton could possibly be staring at. Maybe these too tight jeans weren't so bad after all. Logan sat down, much too pleased with himself. He pretended not to notice, but made sure to stage more of the little accidents. He smiled when Logan handed him the spoon. He started eating his dessert quietly.

"So you know what I do for a living, but I don't know about you." Logan settled on a conversation topic.

"I'm a pediatric nurse." He answered.

"Primary or Acute?" Logan asked.

"Primary, but I go over to the hospital if they need an extra hand." Patton shrugged, "How long have you been teaching?" 

"About 5 years, if you include teaching while I was still shadowing, because I could shadow myself for a portion of my hours. Cut my time in half. A truly wonderful thing that they decided to implement. If that doesn't count then 4 years." He said, "Not a long time, but the kids all love my classes and I have yet to have a student get less than a C. Granted everyone who has a say in what I do despises me for doing things an alternate way."

"Like what?" 

"I give study time at the end of every class, I let kids rest if they need it, I help them with other classes if I can, let any of them come in during lunch if they're getting picked on even if I don't teach them, anything I can do to make their lives a little easier. Whether that means helping them analyze a poem for English class or helping them come out of the closet." He gestured to Patton, who looked like he was about to cry, "Are you okay?"

"That's just so sweet of you, and I love it so much. You must be every kid's favorite teacher, my goodness that's cute. You're such a precious angel." He said, choking back sobs. Logan thought this amount of emotion was only reserved for pregnant women, but apparently not, "How could anyone hate you?"

"They feel like I put more emphasis on the child's well being than the lessons." He explained. They continued eating their ice cream, Patton calming down a little. They talked about nothing before leaving to the aquarium. They entered and Patton dragged him around the different exhibits. He saw an octopus and brought Logan over to look at it.

"Look at him wiggle around, he's so excited. Do you see him Logan?" He asked, giddy and excited. He was grinning and pointing to the animal.

"Octopuses don't have any bones, so they can fit into spaces the size of quarters. They're also some of the most intelligent animals, being able to open jars and childproof pill bottles, some of them can morph their shape appearing to shapeshift, they can use coconut's like shells, like a hermit crab, they can change their color based on what's around them to camouflage themselves. They can even attack and kill sharks." Logan told him.

"That's so cool. You're so cool little octopus. You deserve extra treats for being so cool." Patton told the octopus, "Look! Jellyfish!"

Patton pointed to all the different fish, and Logan would spit out facts. Patton was in awe at everything, and Logan pretended he didn't realize they had been holding hands since they entered the building. All too soon, it was time to go. They sat in Patton's car in Logan's driveway, he hadn't felt so much like a teenager in years. It was quiet.

"I had a lot of fun with you." Patton said after a few moments of silence.

"And I with you. Perhaps we could go out another time?" Logan asked.

"Friday next week? Or is that too soon?" Patton asked.

"Not at all. I-I'll see you then." Logan wasn't sure what his sentence was going to be before he changed it. He was about to get out and head inside.

"Let me know when you get out of school. That sounds terrible. Let me know when you get off work, that's much better." Patton nodded. Logan smiled.

"I will." He opened the car door.

"Oh, and Logan." Patton said. He turned to look at the other man and so many things happened at once that he wasn't sure he processed it all. Patton's hand was on his cheek, bringing him closer, and then they were kissing, and Logan's hands were moving to his hair. Patton wasn't rough, or hard, or anything similar. He was sweet, soft, gentle, but possessive and Logan was loving it. He pulled away and sent him inside. Logan pecked his lips one more time before leaving. 

He stepped inside his home and was met with a bouncing Valerie begging to know how it went.

"So fucking good." He laughed, leaning against the now closed door. He sighed as he told her details, she was bringing him to the kitchen and making him tea as he talked.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact:The plural form of octopus is octopuses. Octopi is incorrect.


	5. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Makeovers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Roman's Makeup](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-ge-qsodvfQ)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> There's some mention of medication and mental disorders/previous eating disorders. It is only mentioned briefly, but heads up anyway.  
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! WE GOT MORALITY'S NAME!!!!!!! (If you're reading this is the future, I changed all the old chapters I not psychic. And let me know if you have legit hoverboards yet. Not the handle-less segways that we have now.

"Dad, where are you going?" Virgil asked him. His dad had been hurrying around all morning with no explanation.

"I have a date." He answered. Virgil's jaw dropped, his dad hadn't even brought up the idea of dating for 10 years, not since he gave up years after Mom left, "Is that alright?"

"Yeah, just a little surprising." He said, "Let me know how it goes."

"I will, kiddo." He smiled. 

"Roman's wanting to come over, is that okay?" He asked. 

"Of course, but if you have sex then remember condoms. I don't want to have to take care of any diseases." Patton said. Virgil blushed furiously. 

"We're not going to have sex." He said. As much as he wanted to, they had agreed to wait until they were both 18. It was the one time Virgil was happy he was younger than his boyfriend, less waiting.

"Still reminding you." Patton said. Virgil let Roman know that he was welcome to come over. Within the hour, Roman had arrived and Patton had gone. The two boys were sitting on the couch together, Virgil on top of his boyfriend.

"Can I do your makeup?" Virgil asked.

"I've got practice in a couple hours, so it'll have to be something I can wear to that." Roman said.

"Smokey eyes with glitter?" He begged.

"As long as it's nothing too dark." He insisted. Virgil nodded and brought him upstairs. He gathered his makeup supplies from the bathroom and sat Roman down on his bed. He took the chair from his desk and placed his stuff on the floor. Roman sat very patiently through the base process, letting Virgil blend to his heart's content even though he hated it. He picked a big white eye pencil out of his collection and started covering his lids.

"Look up." Virgil told him. He put more white in the waterline of his eyes. He put the pencil away and began to pat a white shadow on top of the pencil. 

"Can I turn on some music?" Roman asked.

"Go for it, you know what I'll listen to." Virgil told him, grabbing some more colors and brushes so Roman could turn something on. Soon music quietly filled the room. Virgil took a shimmery peachy eyeshadow and blended it out. Roman sang to the song playing while Virgil switched out his color to a maroon shade. Roman's music was slowly growing on him, and in turn Roman was starting to like Virgil's. He was looking at what he was doing, and found it boring. When he was finished with the maroon, he picked to peach back up and put little arches where Roman's eyebrows turned into his nose. He finally blended some black over the maroon color, and put a mix of the two colors in the center of the little arches. He sat back and looked at the work he did.

Soft, smokey, and a little sexy. Maybe a little bit more eccentric than he meant it to be, but it worked out. He was proud. But he had to finish it up before he could move onto the rest of the face. He decided to skip out on eyeliner, so he moved directly to mascara.

"You up for lashes and glitter today, or do you wanna skip it?" He asked. 

"I'm always up for lashes and glitter." Roman answered, Virgil gave him a little kiss on the cheek and started putting glue on one of the eyelashes. He handed it to Roman to dry and started patting glue over his lid for glitter. 

"Don't open your eyes or you will look stupid and I will laugh at you." Virgil said. Roman stuck his tongue out, Virgil had the strange urge to bite down on it, but he internalized it. He opened the little jar of glitter and pat that over the glue. He put the eyelash on after that, quickly giving Roman another kiss when he was finished. His eyes looked lopsided with only one side finished. He repeated the same steps on the other eye. With both eyes complete, Virgil felt satisfied. He loved it, and he loved Roman. He started to contour his face, adding shadows over his face. A warm, peachy blush made his face look a little brighter and alive. He highlighted his face quickly before handing him two tubes of lipstick.

"Dark red, or peachy brown?" Roman considered his options out loud, "Let's go with the peachy brown. Don't want to be too over dramatic."

"Good point." He took the tubes from him and put on his chosen color. It looked a little darker than what he wanted, "Can I ombre lip?"

"Why not?" Roman shrugged. Virgil blended a white lipstick into the center of his lips, having Roman blend it out by pressing his lips together. He sat back, taking in his work, and he felt proud. He started cleaning up, handing Roman a mirror, "Oh wow. That's strangely very lovely. I actually like it a lot, it works well."

"Thank you, I wasn't entirely sure what I was doing. It worked out though." He kissed the skin behind his ear softly.

"You're very affectionate today, Virgil. Is this just a day for you, or did something happen. Also, where is your dad?" He asked.

"Dad's on a date. He didn't tell me who she was, or anything about her at all. Just that he was going on a date. As to why I'm so affectionate, I don't know. Probably just a day." He shrugged. He might have been lying a little bit. He'd had a nightmare and didn't want to wake him up in the middle of the night to talk to him. There was so much he'd never told Roman, what if something slipped? His OCD, his chronic migraines, his recovery from anorexia, the fact that he was secretly terrified that Roman was doing all this as a joke, that he always thought out every word he said in case he messed up. 

"Where do you think they're going?" Roman asked. He slipped his arms around Virgil and pulled him onto the bed with him. Virgil rested his head on his chest. 

"I don't have any idea. What happens if I have to meet her?" He asked. Roman chuckled, "I'm being serious."

"I know you are, that's why I'm laughing. If you have to meet her then it'll probably be a short meeting and if it isn't, your dad can help you carry on a conversation with her. It won't be a big deal." He said. 

"Not to you, it's not. But even the thought of it is spiking up my anxiety." He admitted.

"If it gets too bad, ask to use the bathroom and then call me. If he needs to, your dad can explain to her that you don't like meeting new people." He comforted, "Speaking of anxiety, did you take your pills today?"

"I'll be right back." Virgil groaned. He was lucky that everything wrong with him could pretty much be fixed with the same pill. Just antidepressants and an extra multivitamin that his dad made him take every day. He swallowed them together with a gulp of water. He took his glass and a box of crackers upstairs with him. If he didn't have food in him at the same time as his medication it upset his stomach. He placed himself back on Roman's lap. They shared a box of crackers together and talked together for what felt like just a few minutes. 

"You're not wearing makeup today." Roman said. Virgil shook his head.

"No, I washed it all off after school." He said.

"I never noticed your freckles before." Roman smiled. Virgil hated the freckles across his nose, that's why he always tried to cover them up, "They're so cute. Look at them."

"They're not cute, they're awful." He said.

"Who told you that? There are dozens of tutorials about how to fake freckles. Thousands, if not millions of people are trying to get what you're hiding away. Love it, flaunt it, show the world that you're better than them because you've been kissed by angels." Roman told him. Virgil was burying his face in his shoulder to hide his blush, "I love you, princess."

"I don't want you to have to leave." He said.

"I know, but I have to leave in," He checked the time on his phone, "Actually, right now. You're welcome to come with if you'd like." 

Virgil nodded. They hurried out to his car and started it up. Since Roman picked the music last time, he let Virgil pick. He knew Roman was starting to enjoy his music, even if he wouldn't admit it. They went inside and he followed Roman back to the stage. A girl sat in a chair next to an older woman, who Virgil assumed was her mother. Another woman who was on stage greeted the pair.

"Roman, hello. You're wearing makeup, did you do that yourself?" She asked him, "It's incredible."

"No actually, my boyfriend did it." Roman pushed Virgil forward, making him blush bright red. He whispered to him that this was the production manager.

"Really. You have a real talent. How would you like to work on the makeup team for the show?" She asked, Virgil's jaw dropped. He never thought about actually doing anything with makeup beyond it just being a hobby. He hadn't even really done makeup on anyone other than himself and Roman. He didn't know what to say to her.

"I'd love to." He finally said. The girl's mother was talking to her daughter.

"Great. There's a costume meeting next week that you should go to. It'll be you and two other girls working on makeup. Did you come up with that yourself?" She asked, Virgil nodded, "I'm putting you in charge. Obviously you've got creativity, so I think you can do it."

Virgil was equally flattered and terrified at the job offer. The mother tapped Roman on the shoulder.

"Excuse me," She smiled, "I have to go run errands. My daughter is staying here, so is it alright if I give you my phone number so she can call if she needs me?"

"Oh, of course." He smiled. They hurried with practice, Virgil thinking up ideas for the different characters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case anyone cares in the slightest. I made them all Spotify playlists for what I'm planning on having them/me listen to (while I write the chapters)  
> [Roman](https://open.spotify.com/user/12137415052/playlist/2KGayUpLrVF4vM8g5WSjRF)  
> [Virgil](https://open.spotify.com/user/12137415052/playlist/3cMmLobQi1wJ52DlE3eFWQ)  
> [Logan](https://open.spotify.com/user/12137415052/playlist/0EztBtwpL6rUaQM1hUW5Ph)  
> [Patton](https://open.spotify.com/user/12137415052/playlist/5QoEC4Gau68jE5MMVMfPab)
> 
> I don't know why I never brought this up, but because they're not the same person, they do have some minor differences (like freckles). If you guys would like, I can let you all know what they all are in the next chapter update.


	6. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sweet, fluffy cupcakes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bit of dirty talking at the end, and a hint at some Possessive Patton.

Patton was so excited, he'd given Logan all the control this time. He'd gotten a text asking if he was comfortable going over to Logan's house, and Patton agreed right away. He wanted to see where he lived, as creepy as it sounded when he told himself that. Virgil was obviously anxious about the idea that his dad was successfully dating, as many times as he assured him he would love "her." He had yet to tell Virgil that he was seeing a boy, he just avoided the subject as much as he could. He was getting ready to go, and Virgil wasn't enjoying himself.

"Will have to meet her?" He asked. biting his lip.

"If it goes well. You might be surprised, actually." Patton had listened to him rave about Logan when he first got put in his class. It would be fine, right? No big deal. He would be surprised for sure.

"It seems to be going well. You just saw her last week." He said.

"Virgil, we've had one date. Anything could happen. But it'll be okay, don't worry, okay? If you have any problem at all, you can tell me. You know that right?" He asked with a smile. Virgil nodded, "But I can't fix anything if I don't know the issue. I don't want to have another scare, I think that's understandable."

"Yeah, I get it. Can I have a hug?" Virgil held out his arms, Patton hugged his little boy. His spine was still much more prominent than it used to be, despite having so much cushioning from his layers of soft clothes, "I hope it goes well, Dad. I'm sorry for freaking out so much."

"Don't apologize for that, kiddo. It's new and weird and different, and I'm sure you're freaked out a lot more than you're letting on. That's okay, you can be concerned, but it'll all be okay in the end." He pulled away from him, still holding his shoulders, "You have a meeting tomorrow?"

"For the play, yeah. I'll tell you what we come up with." He promised, "You could bring her to the show if you want. It's in December." 

"I'd love to show you off, but that means you'll probably have to be introduced. You can handle that?" He asked. Virgil nodded.

"I can do it." He said.

"Then I will share the invitation." Patton said.

~*~

He knocked on the door with a very large bouquet. Logan appeared in the doorway a few moments later and blushed when he saw the flowers. Patton thrust the flowers at him and was waved inside. He took in the pale, off white walls and near black furniture. Odd trinkets were placed everywhere. Patton picked up what looked like a pile of metal rings, he didn't quite get what it was. Logan turned from putting the flowers in water and saw that he was looking at it, he walked over and took it gently from his hands. He rolled his sleeves up.

"It's called a Vertical Vortex. It's-a-uhm-well, it's a kinetic spring. So the metal is bent in such a way that it lets you do things like this-" He twisted it between his hands and it blossomed into a swirling, wire cage shaped like a donut. Logan made it dance up his arms before twisting it again and making it collapse.

"You have a magic slinky." Patton grinned. He wasn't sure what else to call it, but he wanted to watch it all day.

"Not magic, but I understand your confusion." He put it back down where it was. Patton kept looking at everything, wanting to absorb it all. His house was set up around the hallway, which opened up into the kitchen and living room. Two doors on each side of the hall and one more at the end. The hardwood floors made it the perfect home to slide around in fuzzy socks. 

"So, are there any plans for today?" Patton asked.

"I don't know, do you want to play a board game?" His cheeks and nose were pink. He was shy. Patton wanted to hold him and smother him with kisses, he was so adorable. He was falling in love so quickly, a flaw of his that had made his life much harder than it needed to be. He didn't care, he was so full of love that he just pushed it onto the first person he could find, it made everyone else much happier so why would he be upset about that? 

"What do you have?" He asked. Logan shrugged and brought him to the door at the end of the hall which opened into a wood staircase down, that must be where the board games were. Patton knew there were spiders down there, it was the perfect spidery home. Logan turned on the lights, which made it look a little less spidery, but still very spidery. He carefully slipped his hand into Logan's, maybe he could help protect Patton from the spiders. Logan looked confused.

"Are you alright?" He asked. He must've seen how concerned Patton looked.

"Spiders." Was his simple answer.

"You're afraid of spiders?" Logan was a little taken back.

"You're not? If there's a spider in the house Virgil and I both avoid that room for a few days to make sure it's gone." He pointed out.

"You don't take it outside or anything?" Logan asked. Patton shook his head.

"Why would I touch it?" He asked. Logan rolled his eyes and took him downstairs. It wasn't actually that scary. It was still the concrete walls of a basement, but it was set up like it was part of the house. There was a washing machine and drier in one corner with a few laundry baskets by it, all full of different colored cloths. The black and white baskets were mountains while the one of color was almost empty. There was a couch facing a little TV and a deep purple rug that looked soft enough to sleep on. A large basket was overflowing with blankets. He wondered what Logan had this little extra room for, and where that door led.

"That goes to the garage." He said like he was reading Patton's mind. What if he was? Patton had to test the theory. He began singing Fergalicious in his head and got no response. So Logan couldn't read minds. Glad he had established that, he let Logan bring him to a row of bookcases. Most were overflowing with books, some in languages that Patton could only guess at. Logan looked at the bookcase that held board games while Patton scanned the shelves. He picked up a book at least 3 inches thick, a sad drawing of a little girl in a dress holding a broom was portrayed on the front. He could read the author's name, Victor Hugo, the rest was in what Patton assumed to be French. He recognized the title, not from books, but from Broadway posters. He opened it up and was greeted with lines and lines of French.

Logan looked over and saw what he was holding.

"Les Mis. I decided to get a French copy instead of an English copy to stay as true to the original as possible. When you translate books it always ends up a little garbled." He shrugged.

"You know French?" Patton was amazed.

"And Spanish, and Italian, and German, and Dutch, and a little bit of Latin and Russian." He didn't act very impressed. He just happened to know 8 languages, "If ASL counts I know that too."

Make it 9. Patton didn't know if he should believe him or not. 

"What's my name in sign language?" He asked, mostly because he was genuinely curious. Logan made a symbol like an upside down shadow puppet rabbit with his thumb between the ears, it switched to a fist with his thumb to the side of the rest of his fingers, then he moved his thumb between his pointer and middle fingers, then moved his fingers in the same way to show the same thing again, then a circle, and his thumb between his middle and ring fingers. It all happened in about a second and a half. Patton was amazed, "That's so cool!"

Logan blushed and told him to pick out a game. Patton immediately saw Candy Land and picked it up, Logan groaned but agreed to play with him.

"You are helping me find so many things that I don't know why I own. A true talent." He pointed out with a small smile. Patton carried it back upstairs, and he didn't even see one spider. They set up the game, Patton picked the blue piece and Logan picked the red one. Halfway through the game, Patton brought up the idea of cupcakes because the game always made him crave sugar. Logan looked up a recipe on his phone before walking to the kitchen to get out everything they would need. Patton followed him and watched him. He would've helped if it weren't for two very important things. One, he didn't know where anything was. Two, Logan was turned away from him, meaning he got to watch him bend over to get things out of drawers and cupboards. He couldn't help but stare at this point. 

He wanted to bite, and grab, and feel. He allowed himself appreciate only. Logan was leaning over the oven to preheat it, and Patton decided then and there that he was going to have him bent over something as often as he could. He turned around to face Patton, which forced him to pretend to wasn't staring. 

Logan told him how much sugar to add while he cut up the butter. 

"That doesn't seem like enough sugar." He said.

"That's plenty of sugar. You can add up to half of that cup extra. Anymore than that and it'll be sweet enough to rot the teeth out of your head in one bite." Logan told him. 

"Fine, but I need a kiss to make up for how much sweetness you're making me take out." He compromised. Logan let out a tiny noise that Patton only just heard. Patton hooked his fingers through Logan's belt loops and pulled him closer. He pressed their lips together, letting his hands rest on his hips. Logan put his arms around his neck, soon letting his fingers tangle in his hair. He loved kissing him so much. His lips were so soft, he would leave Patton licking his lips afterwards just to taste lemons and coffee a little longer. Logan was the one to break the kiss this time, and Patton was reminded just how pretty he was. 

"We should continue." He whispered. Patton nodded and stepped away. They mixed up the butter and sugar and were slowly adding the eggs. It smelled like heaven in his house. They finished up with the cupcakes with milk, vanilla, and a mix of flour, baking powder, and salt and put them in the oven. They talked, trying to pass the time. Both had forgotten their board game quite a while ago. Soon, Patton got bored with their current position of standing across from each other, so he decided to remedy that. He walked over, picked Logan up, and set him on the counter. He stopped talking, blushing once again. Patton was standing between his legs, close, he felt better. Logan bent over to whisper to Patton.

"When were you planning on announcing how much you stare at my ass?"

"As soon as it meant I got to stare more." Patton smiled, he could feel himself switching over to something he hadn't even felt an inkling of for years. Logan was his now, and he was going to know. He pulled him flush against him, peppering kisses up and down his neck.

"Were you planning on doing anything with your study, or just observe?" Logan's hands were rubbing up and down his chest.

"I want to bend you over and tie you down. I want to spank you and watch you welt up and turn red, legs quivering underneath you. I want to bite and run my nails over you and make it sting. I want to pound into you and fill you up until I leak down your legs." Patton said, biting down on his neck. Logan whined and grabbed fistfuls of his shirt, "You'll ache for days, but that's exactly what I want. I want it to hurt you, so you can think of what I did to you every time you move the wrong way, or sit down. Because you're all mine, and no one else can have you."

Logan's legs were wrapped around his waist. Patton pulled down the collar of his shirt to suck at his collarbone, he didn't expect to see black ink just underneath it. He chuckled and bit at the tattoo, not really paying attention to what it was. Logan whimpered quietly. Patton was very slowly pushing him down, without noticing he was even doing it. That is until Logan had to let go of him with one of his hands so he could brace himself against the counter top. Patton was tugging at the hem of Logan shirt, slowly peeling it off of him. 

The timer went off, jolting them both. Patton pulled away, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Both started blushing once they realized what had just happened. Patton stepped away and helped Logan off the counter. They took the cupcakes out of the oven and set them out to cool.

"So, you have a tattoo?" He asked a very obvious question at that point. Logan nodded and pulled back his shirt to show it off, a bruise was already starting to develop where Patton's teeth were just moments ago. different sized circles all in a line next to a few diagonal lines starting at his right shoulder. The third circle from the lines was blue and one of the larger circles had a ring around it. A map of the solar system, "Do you have any others?"

"Two more. One on my hip of the golden spiral and the phases of the moon down my leg. I would show you those, but the spiral would require me to pull down my pants quite a bit, and the one on my leg needs me to basically take my pants off. Neither of those things seem like that great of an idea." He said, scratching the back of his head, "I used to have quite a few piercings too, but they've all closed up."

"No way, you didn't." Patton denied. Tattoos he could believe, but a face full of metal was a bit more difficult.

"I did. I had an industrial, which is like a bar that goes through your ear, I had two other cartilage piercings in that ear. The other one I had a rook, which is on one of the folds of your ear, three cartilage piercings, and normal lobe earrings on both ears. I also had shark bites and a tongue piercing." He listed off, "I'll see if I have pictures and show you."

"I won't believe it until I see pictures." Patton smiled.

"Then I will do my best to get you some. I do believe that the more pressing matter is the fact that you have some very surprising kinks that you've revealed." Logan smiled at him.

"Maybe, a couple on accident." He was blushing bright red. He didn't want to have this conversation so early, but he did sort of ask for it.

"Oh just bondage, some sadism, spanking, possession, I assume some domination as well." Logan walked over to him, "Just a couple."

"I didn't mean to say all that. I was just getting carried away. I'm so sorry if I made you uncomfortable." He bit his lip, he messed it up. This was the end of it all, he'd never get to see the rest of his tattoos, or pictures of him with metal through his skin.

"Was I complaining?" Logan wrapped his arms around his neck. Patton shook his head, "Then I'm not uncomfortable?"

"You're sure?" Patton asked.

"As sure as I am about my name being Logan Sanders." He gave him a quick kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [In case you don't know what a Vertical Vortex is](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNyn8Xj-q8E)  
> [Logan's tattoo](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/d1/b5/95/d1b595da7ff4665530a3e49d64413183.jpg) but on his collarbone and with a sun included.  
>  If you're wondering what shark bites are, it's like double snake bites kind of. It's snake bites, but two piercings on each side of your lower lip.


	7. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman and Virgil are stuck in bed together with the lights off.

Roman was eating lunch with Ben, Virgil was nowhere to be found. Roman was jittery. What if Virgil died? What if he found stairs and fell down them? What if he was hurt? What if he had hurt _himself?_ What if he was sick and needed snuggles and soup? What if he was sad? What if he was skipping to do drugs with the bad kids? There was so much bad that could happen to him, and Roman didn't know what to do. He had related this all to Ben, who did not seem to understand the gravity of the situation.

"Ben, he could be dead."

"He could also be meeting a teacher during lunch." Ben pointed out, "If you're really worried, why don't you text him and see where he is?"

"I did that already, he hasn't responded." Roman told him. As if on cue his phone dinged at him. He pulled it out with anticipation, to see a text from Virgil. He quickly opened it up to read it. 

_Hi, this is Patton. Virgil is home with a migraine today and he's sorry if he worried you. He'd respond himself, but the light bothers him. He told me to text you from his phone, and to request that you take notes for him in Chemistry and English._

Roman needed to help his princess, snuggle with him, and hug him, and give him lots of kisses, and play with his hair just like he knew he secretly loved. He could tell him stories, unless it hurt his head, then he would just hold him and make sure he felt safe and loved.

_I don't know if you know this already, but your name in his phone is Prince Charming and that's the cutest thing I will see all day so I had to share._

_Don't tell him I said anything._

Roman read the two text that came in and smiled.

"I take it that's everything is okay." Ben asked.

"Well his dad just texted me saying he has a migraine, so no, it's not okay. I'm smiling because his dad says that my name in his phone is Prince Charming." Roman explained.

"I see. How's the play going?" Ben asked.

"Oh, just absolutely fantastic. There's this adorable little girl named Stella playing Little Red and she's so much fun. She's 13, and I love her, we're best friends." He said, "And Ryan is just magnificent to work with. He's the other Prince. He's pretty quiet, that is until you hand him a script. Amalie is a bit of a bitch, but I can run with it."

"Amelie is Cinderella?" Ben asked, Roman nodded, "Is Stella freaked out by the fact that you're singing about her pink, plump flesh?"

"A little at first, but she's warming up to it. Now we mostly just take selfies together between the work." He shrugged. He loved her so much, she was fun and cute and a perfect Little Red Riding Hood. Of course, he had yet to meet the Baker's Wife, which may pose an issue in the future. The were practicing with Amalie together this weekend though, so he would meet her then. 

"I feel like I never get to talk to you anymore. You're always fawning over your boyfriend like he's the center of the universe. How has his ego not gotten bigger than Russia?" Ben asked, he sounded exasperated. 

"I'm sorry I pay more attention to him than you, but he has a lot of issues that he's trying to deal with. I'm doing everything I can to show him that at least two people love him, his dad, and me. I'm always scared that he's going to do something awful and I'll lose him, I've already found him in some situations that scared the hell out of me. I just want to lighten his load a little bit. Why do you think I almost always follow him into bathrooms?" He explained himself.

"I always assumed that you two were making out or something." Ben shrugged, "Are you not doing that?"

"Virgil gets panic attacks, he hides out in bathrooms to calm down. I follow him to try and calm him down." Roman said.

"God, that must suck. The panic attacks I mean, not trying to calm him down. That doesn't seem like a lot of baggage though."

"That's one thing out of quite a few things. I don't really think it's my place to tell you exactly what's, but it's a lot." He shrugged, "We better get going. The bell's about to ring."

Ben packed up his things and started walking with him to class. Roman felt a little sad. He looked sad too, judging from Ben's attempts to lighten up the mood. Mr. Sanders was wiping down the whiteboard when they walked in, Roman told him why Virgil wouldn't be in class today and promised to take extra detailed notes for him. 

He explained the situation once more to their English teacher and wrote down everything Virgil would need to do to catch up. When the bell rang after his last class he went to the rest of Virgil's teachers and made sure to pay close attention to what they needed him to do. Once he'd gone to the other four teachers, he drove over to Virgil's to help him out. Patton let him inside and they talked for a little while, not wanting to bother Virgil.

"He tells me you've started dating again. How's that going?" Roman asked.

"Actually really well. There's this one person that I've gone out with twice now and both times went amazingly." Patton grinned.

"Oh, really? What's she like?" Roman was genuinely curious, plus he wanted to gauge how much he would need to worry so Virgil didn't have to.

"You're not allowed to tell Virgli this, okay? I don't want him knowing yet." Patton twisted the hem of his shirt, Roman nodded suspiciously, "I'm kinda maybe sorta going out with your teacher Logan."

"You're what?" Roman didn't know if he heard him right.

"I've been dating Logan, your chem-"

"I know who Logan is. Wait, did you two have sex?" Roman was torn. The side of him that was maybe a little more girl than boy wanted to gossip for hours, the other side was very much weirded out and didn't want to know about it.

"Uhm, well, no." Patton said after a moment of silence.

"That was an awfully long pause." Roman pointed out.

"We haven't done anything yet, but we did come very close at one point. Possibly on his kitchen counter." Patton shrugged. Roman wanted to lay on the floor and scream because how the hell was he supposed to react to that? Patton tried to fill the silence, "He's never been over here though, and I only went over that one time."

Roman's inner gossip girl was already hatching a plan, but he had to decide if he wanted to go through with it. He took a deep breath, "Do you want him to come over here?"

"I'd love it, but I have Virgil. I can't bring him here if Virgil is here too." He stated. Roman decided to jump into the deep end, who knows, it might be fun.

"What if Virgil wasn't here?" He asked, Patton looked shocked, "Are you working next week on Friday?"

Patton shook his head.

"Virgil and I have the play to work on after school Friday, I was planning on taking him directly from school with maybe a stop for him to get what he needs. If you'd like, he can just stay the night with me, if that's alright I mean. You can have Logan over all afternoon and evening for as late as you like. I'll have Virgil, so all you'll need to worry about Logan." Roman explained his plan, already knowing that Patton would agree.

"You'll take good care of Virgil?" He bit his lip.

"Why do you think I'm here?" 

"Good point, I'll call him. I should give you my phone number just in case something happens." Patton said, Roman pulled up a new contacts page and handed his phone over. Patton typed in his phone number and handed it back. Roman sent a quick text saying "hi" so Patton had his number too, "You are something special Roman."

"Don't worry, I know." He smiled. Did he just help his boyfriend's dad hook up with his teacher? Yes, he just did that. 

He went upstairs to what he remembered to be Virgil's room. He knocked as quietly as he could before slowly opening the door. He stepped inside and whispered a quiet hello to the lump under the blankets, which groaned. The curtains were pulled tightly together, blocking out most of the dimming light from outside. He sat down at the foot of the bed and gently stroked what he assumed to be Virgil's leg through the comforter. He asked if he could lay down with him or if he needed anything.

"Can you please get me water? I have a cup on the dresser, it's empty. Something with caffeine also helps." Virgil requested, his voice soft. Roman bent down, pulling the blankets back just enough to kiss the back of his neck. He stood up and took the glass downstairs to fill it with water. When he came back up, Virgli was sitting up, his head down and hair messy. Roman's breath caught in his throat, but he handed him the cup and sat back down next to him. When he finished sipping at his water, he set it on his nightstand and tilted forward so he could rest his forehead on Roman's shoulder.

"Is it alright it I talk, or does it hurt your head too much?" Roman asked, he would happily sit in complete silence and darkness if it was to make Virgil feel better.

"As long as you're quiet, it's okay. The light bothers me more than sound." He murmured, "Can you come snuggle, please?"

"Of course I can, my princess. Do you need anything else?" He asked. He snuggled under the covers. Virgil buried his head in his chest to keep the little light left in the room from reaching his eyes.

"Sleep. Can you tell me a story?" He mumbled into his shirt, "One that everyone knows, or one you make up. I really don't care. I just want a bedtime story."

Roman hummed and ran his fingers through his hair. Virgil nuzzled him and relaxed just from that action. Roman didn't feel like trying to think of his own story, so he told him fairy tales that he liked growing up. Cinderella, Hansel and Gretel, Princess and the Pea. By the time he finished Snow White, Virgil was fast asleep, softly snoring. Roman smiled and pulled the sleeping boy closer. His phone buzzed in his pocket, he pulled it out and was blinded for a little bit. He tried to turn down the brightness, but it was as dark as it could get. A text from Patton.

_How's he doing up there? Everything alright?_

Roman typed out a reply, _He just fell asleep. He wanted to try and sleep it off._

He put his phone back away, his eyes burning like the gates of heaven itself opened for him. He held his princess carefully, he didn't want to break him. So soft and quiet and pretty when he slept. Soon, Roman fell asleep to the sound of Virgil's breathing.


	8. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Blanket forts

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some talk about body issues ahead. Just a warning.

It was 4:00 on a Friday, and Logan was sitting on Patton's couch while he was in the kitchen getting them water. Logan didn't drink often, so he opted for something non-alcoholic. Patton claimed that Virgil was going to be with Roman all night, but Logan was still nervous about the situation. And this was their third date, and while he was oblivious to a lot, he was not oblivious to what was supposed to happen on the third date. He was more than happy with where they were there, he didn't want to push further yet. What if Patton didn't see it that way? They'd already gotten close, why was he gaining concern now? Patton handed him a glass as he sat down next to him and kissed his cheek. His nerves were going haywire, he analyzed the cup in his hands to try and calm himself down. The glass it was made from was thin and smooth, shaped in a smooth curve, the base was thick and heavier than the rest of the cup, it was hard and cold in his hands, and-

"Are you okay? You seem distracted." Patton grabbed his hand.

He was terrified. He didn't know what he was doing or how to react. He wanted to hide away under the covers of his bed. 

"Yeah, I'm fine. Just thinking." He set his glass on the coffee table and kissed Patton gently. He relaxed into it. Why was he so stressed about what other people thought he should do? It never bothered him before. Actually, that was a lie. It used to bother him a lot. He hadn't been bothered since college. That was more truthful. He brought his hands to Patton's cheeks. They were falling over again, this time Logan's head hit the couch. One of Patton's hands was on his waist, the other was next to his head, holding him up. Patton broke the kiss and looked down at him, smiling.

"Wanna watch a movie?" He asked, Logan's face was warming up, "Wow, even that made you blush. You look adorable when you blush, you know."

That only made him blush harder. He agreed to watch a movie. Patton sat up and grabbed the remote, he was still sitting between Logan's legs. They selected a movie together, neither one brought up their position. Of course, once it was playing, they moved anyway. Patton slipped out from between his legs and snuggled in behind him. Logan rolled onto his side, back against Patton's chest. An arm was around his waist, making him extremely aware of the little belly he had. He could feel Patton breathing behind him, even and slow. They were about ten minutes into the movie before Patton started whining.

"Stop doing that." He muttered.

"Doing what?" Logan didn't know what he had done wrong.

"You're sucking your tummy in to pretend to be skinnier than you are. Stop doing that." Patton sat up to look at him.

"I didn't notice that I-"

"You don't need to be so self conscious. Don't worry." He gave Logan a kiss and smiled. Logan nodded, Patton lowered himself back down and pulled him in close. Logan put a conscious effort into relaxing. Patton hummed quietly and nuzzled the back of his neck. Logan smiled, he felt content like this. 

He was by no means overweight, or even a little bit chubby. He was average, maybe a few pounds over at his heaviest. He knew that, he was aware that his size was healthier than it had been in a while, but he felt too big. He'd been extremely thin for most of his life, almost frighteningly so. When he started rapidly gaining weight, it made him feel awful about himself. He hated his tummy and his thighs. He was forgetting it now, with Patton's hand resting around his stomach. Patton's phone buzzed against Logan's lower back and made him jump a little.

"Oh, shoot. I should've turned this stupid thing off." He took it out of his pocket and turned off the vibration. He reached around Logan to set it on the coffee table. He just noticed that his shirt was beginning to hike up. He was going to pull it back down, but Patton's hand slipped under the hem. Logan expected him to rub and kiss, but his hand stayed still. His thumb stroked the sensitive skin, but that was all. Logan let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. They weren't watching the movie anymore. How could Logan focus on a movie when Patton was whispering about his pretty stomach.

"You're skin is so soft. Look how lucky I am to be able to hold your lovely little belly. I could sit and touch my baby's tummy all day long." Patton was leaving little kisses over his neck. Logan's heart skipped a beat when he heard the new pet name, he purred and snuggled into him, "Do you like being called my beautiful baby boy?"

Logan nodded. He was blushing again, but for a different reason now.

"Then you'll be my baby boy. All mine." Patton kissed the skin behind his ear softly. "We have all night together, we can do whatever we want. We could wait till it gets dark and have a picnic outside and look at the stars. We could build a blanket fort and play silly middle school games. We could have a movie marathon. Or maybe we can have some extra special grown up fun. Anything you like, and nothing you don't."

"I've never actually built a blanket fort before." Logan admitted.

"Get up. I know what we're doing now." Patton pushed him lightly. Logan stood up and watched him bring chairs in from the dining room. He was running around the house, gathering supplies. Logan was instructed to move the coffee table to the side of the room. Patton was arranging chairs against the couch and draping sheets over the whole mess, having Logan help with whatever he could think of. He put a fluffy blanket down on the floor, along with quite a few pillows, to sit on. The side facing the tv could be pushed away like a curtain, but right now it was covered. Patton crawled inside, said it was too dark, and crawled back out. He went upstairs. When he came back down he was holding a little ball with a cord attached. He plugged it into the wall and pushed it under a chair and into their fort. He twisted the little disk on the cord to turn it on. Patton crawled back in and invited Logan under with him. 

There was room inside, but not much. It was warm and soft and cozy. The little ball had lit up multi colored and was shifting colors slowly. Patton was grinning and Logan felt so much happier, more relaxed, just from being in here with Patton. 

"What should we do now? We don't have a lot of room so pick something we can do without that." He smiled, "Or do you want to play middle school games like I suggested earlier?"

Logan shrugged, frankly he didn't care. 

"Have you played Two Truths and a Lie?" He asked. Logan nodded, he played a version he called snowball on the first day of school every year. He would have the students write their three things on a piece of paper, ball it up, and they would have a snowball fight. When it was over they would pick up the first paper they found and they would read off whoever's they got in front of the class, "You go first."

"Alright," Logan thought, "I moved out when I was 17. I have two older brothers. And my mom has both a cat and a dog."

"You're boring. You didn't move out when you were 17." Patton said. Logan shook his head.

"I finished high school early and went to college, at 17." Logan tapped his nose lightly, "But I am an only child. Your turn."

"Once my sister punched a hole in the wall and my pet lizard ran into it and never came back out. There was this one time that this guy tried to rob me so I beat him up with an umbrella and broke his arm. And I accidentally dropped my phone on the concrete and it shattered while I was talking on it and I never called them back." Patton listed off. Logan just stared at him.

"You made all three of those up." Logan told him.

"I did not cheat." Patton said defensively. 

"I honestly don't know. I can't even fathom a guess. Why do people think I do things oddly?" Logan shrugged.

"I did call them back. They didn't believe me." Patton sighed.

"You broke someone's arm with an umbrella?" 

"It sounds a lot cooler than it actually was. It was a lot of me crying and hitting him with Emily's pink umbrella. I just panicked." He stared at his lap. Logan didn't really know how to respond to the situation.

"Who's Emily?" Logan decided to ask, "Your sister."

"No actually. She's Virgil's mom." He suddenly looked very sad. 

"Do you mind me asking what happened? You don't have to tell me if you don't want, I'm just curious." He felt like he was intruding on something very personal, he didn't feel like he should be told, but he asked anyway.

"No, no it's okay. Just not the happiest story. You should know it anyway. We met in highschool and started dating, we were 16. On her 18th birthday, I asked her if she would marry me when we got out of school. It wasn't like an official proposal or anything, more like a pre-proposal if that makes any sense. Anyway, she said yes and two months later she told me she was pregnant. I loved everything about her, and the baby of course. Because I was a few months older than her, Virgil was born when I was 19. The first year went great, no serious hiccups and finally I really proposed to her. The second year, little rockier. I don't have any idea why, but she lost her enthusiasm. She was never home, she was drinking a lot, smoking a lot, I started finding hickeys on her that I know for a fact I did not give her. One morning I woke up and she had just left, she left a note saying that she couldn't do it anymore, she didn't want Virgil anymore and she trusted that I would be a good dad. Haven't spoken to her since." Patton told the story.

Logan didn't know what to say to him, so he didn't say anything. He just hugged him as tightly as he could. There were hands rubbing his back. He gently kissed Patton's cheek. He didn't deserve that. He was such a sweetheart that held nothing but love and acceptance. He was the kind of person that would get yelled at for nothing for hours and apologize because what if they were having a bad day? Such a kind human being needed to be loved just as much as he loved others. If this is what he got, karma didn't exist in this world. Patton carefully pulled him into his lap, which was a much more comfortable position for Logan.

"You deserve better than that." Logan told him quietly.

"Do I deserve you?" Patton asked. Logan's cheeks were hot.

"What you deserve doesn't exist." He replied.

"Well, looks like I'll have to settle for second best." He gently kissed him. Logan was blushing red hot, now burying his face in Patton's shoulder to hide his face. He snuggled into him and tangled fingers into his soft hair, "You're precious, baby boy."


	9. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The ultimate bet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: There is discussion about self-harm ahead. That discussion is at the end after a big, sweet, fluffy, cotton candy mess, so if you want to read just that and not the part talking about self harm then look out for this 
> 
> ** 
> 
> The first one of those will be when the fluff ends, the second one is when the discussion starts. Also note that this discussion is very soft and nice and supportive and squish.

Virgil was watching _Princess Bride_ with Roman and his parents. His head was on Roman's shoulder. Roman's arm was wrapped around his shoulders and holding his hand. Roman's dad had a hand on his wife's thigh. Roman heard that he had never watched it and was determined to change that. It was just finishing up and Virgil felt like he stayed up for too long and his dad told him a joke. The credits started rolling and Roman asked him what he thought.

"Now I finally understand all those jokes you kept making that I didn't get." Virgil smiled. Roman kissed the top of his head, "My dad would love this so much."

"What's your dad doing, Virgil?" Roman's dad asked. 

"I'm not sure. Probably sitting at home without pants on and filling his bed with enough food for an army." Virgil shrugged, Roman's cheeks turned pink. Virgil didn't bother trying to figure out why. Roman let go of Virgil's hand to comb through his hair. He instantly felt more relaxed. He was so in love.

"Oh you two are so cute. Remind me how long have you been together now." His mom grinned.

"Little more than a year and a half." Virgil stated.

"A year and eight months. It'll be two years in March." Roman corrected.

"Thanks for showing me up, really appreciate it." Virgil said.

"You're welcome." Roman said with an equal amount of sarcasm. The parents looked at them and tried to hold back laughter. 

"I wish I had that amount of commitment in high school. Do you think you'll eventually move in with each other?" His dad asked. They both looked at each other for an answer.

"We never really talked about it. I mean, I'm not opposed to the idea." Roman bit his lip.

"I don't see why not." Virgil said, shyly.

"You two should go run upstairs. Let us know if you need anything. You too, Virgil. Don't worry about bothering us." She smiled at the pair and shooed them upstairs. 

Roman collapsed on the bed and pulled Virgil onto his lap, keeping him as close as he could. Virgil giggled and nuzzled into his neck. Roman stroked the back of his head softly and hummed in his ear. 

"Should we move in together, Virgil? Because now that I'm thinking about it, I really want to. I want to wake up next to you every morning, and snuggle with you every night, and try to help you cook because god knows that'll be your job, but I'll clean everything. I want to argue about what curtains to buy and what to eat for dinner and-"

Virgil kissed him to shut him up, "Blinds. Not curtains, I'm not that gay. Except in our room, for the migraines."

"Okay." Roman chuckled and kissed his cheek, "But we are moving in together, right?"

"Oh, yeah, of course. We'll both need jobs in order to start saving up, we could start house hunting when we graduate. We'll have to buy all our furniture, and our food, and-"

This time Roman shut him up, "Don't worry about it right now. We can cross that bridge when we get to it." 

"Yeah, you're right. I shouldn't worry about it yet." Virgil shook his head. Suddenly his eyes caught something he hadn't noticed before, a stuffed rabbit in a little green dress. She was wearing a little apron and another tiny rabbit sat in her pocket. He stood up and picked her up off the shelf.

"Be careful with her." He squeaked, "I've had her since I was little."

"Why is she still sitting out?" Virgil choked back laughter.

"Because I have good memories of her. Now put Mrs. Fluffybottom back on her shelf." Roman insisted. 

"Mrs. Fluffybottom?" 

"I was 3. I bet you still have a stuffed animal in your room from when you were little." Roman pouted. Virgil shook his head, "Yes you do. Don't lie."

"Want to make it a real bet?" Virgil asked, he had an idea to maybe get what he wanted. Roman shrugged and nodded, "If you can find an old stuffed animal in my room before Christmas, then the deal's off. Sex before I turn 18."

"Well, what if I don't find one?" Roman asked, suddenly very interested. Maybe Virgil guessed correctly about what he wanted.

"Then no kisses at all for a full week." Virgil knew he was punishing himself too, but it would be hilarious watching him suffer through that, "The only exception would be during an attack, because I need them then."

"Oh, you're evil. Deal." Roman smirked. Virgil was bluffing the entire time. He had a stuffed Eeyore sitting in his closet right now. The key would be to make sure he hid it well enough that Roman had to work for it, but not so well that he couldn't find it at all, "Now, can you put Mrs. Fluffybottom back?"

Virgil rolled his eyes and set her back down in her spot. He placed himself back on Roman's lap and wrapped his arms around his neck.

"I'm going to find it. Because I refuse to believe you don't have one in there." He tapped Virgil's nose.

"Good luck with that." Virgil kissed him, Roman would need lots of extra kisses so he could think he would be deprived. Virgil just put himself in the most perfect position. 

"Oh, I almost forgot." Roman pushed lightly on Virgil's shoulders, "Your dad sort of told me who he's been dating. I'm not supposed to tell you who it is, which is probably a good idea, but I can promise you that there'll be no negative feelings at all."

"Do I know who she is?" Virgil asked. Roman nodded.

"That's why he doesn't want to tell you yet." Roman was biting his lip.

"And I like her?" Virgil wrung his hands.

"More like love, but yes. A warning for when you find out, it'll be awkward, and weird, and you probably won't want them together, but give it time." Roman explained. Virgil's head spun, he didn't know very many people, much less like them very much. But if Roman knew he would be okay, then he could trust that. He could relax about it, doesn't mean he would, but at least he had some closure. He took a deep breath and nuzzled into his neck. Roman ran his fingers through his hair to calm him down. They stayed quiet, Roman slowly combed through his dark hair, "You're like a cat."

"What? No I'm not." Virgil said defensively.

"Yes you are. You like to be pet, but if the wrong person pets you then they die. You hate sitting on chairs and will sit on anything that isn't a chair. You will sit on me and pretend that it means absolutely nothing. And if I leave you alone for too long then there's a good chance you got yourself into a situation that you can't get out of, like how a cat will tangle itself in the blinds." Roman listed off, "Maybe I should call you kitten instead of princess."

"Shut up." Virgil laughed quietly.

"Maybe I could get you a collar. Do cats wear collars? Or is that just dogs? Yeah, I think cats wear collars, they've got the little bell on them. You could have a little collar and one of those headbands with the ears on it. You'd be adorable." Roman began lightly running his nails over Virgil's scalp. Virgil whined, "Look, my little kitten likes it when I scratch at his little head."

"Shut up." He repeated.

"I am going to get you one of those headbands with the ears on it." Roman told him, "I'm not missing the opportunity."

"You're not getting me one." Virgil shook his head.

"Yes, I am. You don't get a say because I think it'll be the most adorable thing and you need to embrace your true identity." Roman kissed his nose.

"I'm not a cat."

"Yes you are." Roman laughed. Virgil sighed and gave up, his arguing skills were greatly decreased due to how nice Roman's nails felt, "What a pretty little kitty I found."

Virgil squirmed at the praise. Roman's compliments always made his insides feel warm and squirmy, so much so that sometimes his insides made his outside squirmy too. He loved it so much. Roman's free hand was around his waist. He was feeling a little dazed and very happy, perfectly content with this.

**

At least until he realized how overwhelmingly overheated he was getting. He wanted to take of his hoodie so badly, but there was no way he was doing that. Roman seemed to notice his discomfort and started to pull at the sleeves, but Virgil just wanted to crawl away and hide.

"Kitten, it's obvious you're just dying in that. Just take it off, it's not that big of a deal." Roman shrugged.

"No, really, I'm fine." Virgil smiled.

"No, you're not. I don't want this to be an ordeal, just take it off. Okay, kitten?" Roman pleaded with his puppy dog eyes. 

Virgil squirmed for a different reason now, but he peeled off his jacket and just prayed that Roman wouldn't find out. Most of it was on the bottom side of his right arm, so if he just kept that-Roman grabbed his hands and held them up between them.

"See, nothing bad will-"

**

He flipped his hands over to expose the tender undersides of his arms. Virgil pulled them away and stared at his lap, but he was just barely too slow. Roman laced their hands back together as gently as humanly possible. Virgil was red all over and hated everything, he was about to cry. Roman had the fingers of one hand laced with Virgil's damaged hand while the other cradled his cheek carefully. His thumb ran across his cheekbone softly. Virgil nuzzled against him, he focused on breathing and the feeling of Roman's skin against his own. He tried to block out everything but that, barely keeping an attack at bay. Roman let go of his face to hold his arm, pressing gentle kisses over the scars.

"My beautiful princess, can you please tell me why?" Roman asked him, pulling him into a hug. Virgil shrugged halfheartedly. Roman was ghosting his fingers over the white scars, thick and thin, long and short, varying angles along his wrist. Some were across his forearm. He didn't need to look, he had sat and stared at them enough. When he finally got the courage to look up at him, his heart shattered. Roman was biting his lip so badly that tiny droplets of blood were blooming across his mouth. His eyes were red and watery. Virgil had never seen Roman ever really sad even, and now he was crying because of him. 

"I'm sorry, Roman. Please don't be mad at me." Virgil begged.

"Why would I be mad at you?" Roman kissed his nose, "I'm mad at myself because I didn't so my job well enough."

"What?"

"My job is to make you as happy as I possibly can, and I didn't do that as well as I should have. I should've done better." He explained quietly. Virgil kissed him.

"I know it might not seem like it, but you did a lot. If you weren't around, I'd have a lot more, and I'd probably be rotting in a hole in the ground after a terrible funeral, because they're always terrible." Virgil promised. Roman shook his head.

"Don't put that thought into my head. I love you way too much to think about that." 

"I love you too." Virgil snuggled into him. 

"Is it okay if I ask if you're still doing this?" Roman asked.

"No. My arms have been safe for a year because I hated looking at the scars all the time. But that's not the only place with scars, so in total I'm three months clean." Virgil explained. Roman nodded.

"All by yourself? That's a full quarter of a year, I'm so proud of you, princess." Roman tangled his fingers through his hair, he was comforting him, "You're doing so good alone, but everyone needs help, especially with big things like this. Is it okay if I help you out a little bit?"

"Please." Virgil nuzzled into his neck.

"Every time you want to hurt yourself, I want you to either call or text me or both, whatever you prefer. If I don't answer, I want you to draw something pretty wherever you want to hurt yourself. Flowers on your tummy, butterflies on your legs, hearts on your arms, anything you like. And, unless it makes you feel really badly, I want you to send me a picture of what you drew so I know you didn't do anything bad, and I get to see all of your beautiful pictures." Roman explained like he was talking to a child, he did that when he was nervous about something. Virgil though it was because he liked to take care of things and was parental by default, "Can you do that for me, princess?"

"Yeah, I can do that." Virgil nodded, "Thank you."

"Of course, you're my princess. That means that I need to find whatever is making your life difficult so I can kill it." Roman kissed him, Virgil laughed.

"You're an idiot." Virgil smiled.

"I'm your idiot." Roman kissed him again.


	10. Patton

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Logan text_   
>  **Patton text**
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> This is only for this chapter, if it's just one or two texts sent, it'll still be italicized.

Patton was in the break room right now, talking with the other nurses.

"Oh, Patton, I almost forgot." Bette stated, her acrylic nails looked like claws, "I told my cousin about you and she is absolutely dying to meet you. Would you be interested in seeing her for dinner sometime?"

"Actually, I've kinda been seeing someone lately." Patton said apologetically.

"Really? Oh my god, why didn't you tell us sooner. Tell us everything there is to know about her." Bette shrieked. How did she not frighten the children with her talons?

"Well, first off. She's sort of a guy, his name is Logan and he's actually quite a bit younger than I am-"

"How much is quite a bit?" Ginger piped up from the back of the room. She had lots of dark hair and piercings in her ears.

"He's turning 28 in four days." Patton shrugged. Bette and Audrey were both settling in for the gossip.

"What's he like? Don't spare a single detail." Audrey said with her southern accent.

"He's maybe an inch taller than I am. He's got brown hair and blue eyes and glasses. He's a little nerdy, and he gets flustered really easily, but he also doesn't really get a lot of stuff. He's a cutiepie, and he knows nine languages." Patton was beaming at the thought of his baby boy.

"How's his ass?" Ginger asked, snapping at her gum.

"Really cute, he's got a fantastic butt." Patton smiled, Ginger snorted, "He does."

"What's he do for work?" Vivien piped up.

"He's a high school teacher. This is going to make me sound a little trashy, but he's sorta Virgil's chemistry teacher." Patton admitted. Ginger cracked up, "That's how we met, actually. Virgil asked if he could help tell me that he's gay. Oh yeah, Virgil is gay. I forgot to mention that."

"Damn it, he was hot." Ginger whined.

"I'm sorry but he's currently taken. He has a wonderful and loving boyfriend. I just remembered that I have a picture of Logan from last weekend. We built a blanket fort and it was awesome." Patton pulled his phone out of his pocket and showed them the picture of the pair in the blanket fort. Logan had been seated between his legs with his back to Patton's chest. Patton's chin was resting on his shoulder. They all cooed over the picture. He was so soft and precious and Patton needed to love him with all his heart.

Patton was called out. He was helping a little boy with a cast this time. He smiled broadly and showed the boy where to go so they could measure and weigh him.

"How'd you break your arm, kiddo?" He asked as he jotted down the information.

"I fell off my bike. Mom said I was really brave." He answered, "It didn't hurt very much, but then it hurt a lot. The doctor put this on it."

"Yeah, breaking your arm hurts a lot. Pink was a good choice, I like it." Patton told him. The boy's face lit up with a grin.

"Really? All the boys at school say pink is for girls and make fun of me." He pouted.

"Well, they're wrong. Colors don't belong to anyone. My favorite color's pink, you know." He said to the boy, walking him back into the office. The mother looked at him with such gratitude. Patton's heart swelled, he was doing something good. They talked some about the visit before Patton let the doctor take over.

About an hour later, Patton got to let the kid pick out his sticker. He was trying to decide between Batman and Spiderman. Patton leaned over to whisper to him, "If you promise not to tell anyone, I'll let you have both." 

"You will?"

"It has to be a secret though. Can't have everyone thinking that they can get two stickers, right?" Patton gave several kids two stickers a week. He made them all promise not to tell anyone, in case other kids got jealous. Kids always felt so special after he gave them permission. The boy nodded and ran up to his mom, telling her all about his two stickers. Patton loved his job so much.

~*~

It was late, Virgil was already sound asleep, Patton checked on him as soon as he walked in the door. He collapsed on his bed and snuggled into his pillow. His phone pinged next to him, the screen lighting up. It was 11 at night, and he had a text from Logan.

_I hope I'm not bothering you. I couldn't sleep. I thought maybe I could see if you wanted to talk._

**Just got home. What do you want to talk about?**

_I don't know. Pick something._

Patton thought for a while. What did Virgil do when he couldn't sleep? When he was a kid, Patton would read to him until he passed out. When he got into middle school, he took pills to put him to sleep. Now, Patton didn't really know. He knew sometimes he woke up to noises and found Virgil doing something ridiculous, like baking or cleaning. 

**I don't know either. But I have a question if your up for that.**

_It's you're. Yeah, I'm up for it, although I wish I wasn't._

**2 questions, actually. 1 can you please be my boyfriend now, cuz I really want you to. 2 Virgil is working on the play with Roman. Want to come with to the show end of Dec? Maybe I could come clean about you? IDK, probably to soon to bring that up this early.**

Patton hit send. His heart pounded waiting for the response. He was suddenly a teenager again, waiting for a reply to a heavy question and running through the worst case scenarios. It felt like years before his phone lit up again.

_*Too. I'd love to be your boyfriend. But, I was under the impression I already was. I'll come to the show, just let me know when. I believe we should wait and see before we commit to anything. However, if you think it would be the right thing to do, then I trust your judgement._

**Stop correcting my grammar**

_You forgot the period at the end of your sentence ;P_

Patton smiled to himself. Logan was so passive aggressive, he loved it.

**So did you.**

_Different rules for emojis. I'm a teacher. It's my job to know things._

**Shut up >_< I'll keep you updated on the play.**

Patton hit send, then thought of something else. Something important, it had left his brain seconds after it arrived. Patton read through the old texts, seeing if it would bring it back. His old trick worked, he remembered. 

**Virgil knows I'm seriously dating someone and he's panicking. I don't know what to tell him. I've tried to be vague about it, but he needs to know. We need to tell him sooner rather than later. It'll eat him from the inside out if we don't. It would be different if we went on a date or two and that was it, but that's not what's happening. Roman's trying to help, but I don't know how well that's working.**

Again, it took a long time for Logan to reply. Patton was famous among his friends for regurgitating all his feelings onto other people. Hopefully he didn't mess it up.

_I'm terrible with emotions. So much so that Valerie and I have to use the Inside Out characters sometimes of the time so I can understand what's happening. Because of that slight handicap, I may not be much help in this situation. Also, Roman knows?_

Patton laughed to himself. Roman nose. Roman knows. Roman knows Roman has a Roman nose. He shook his head and tried to focus on what needed done.

**I might have told him, and he may have offered to keep Virgil out of the house all night for our date. I'm sorry I told him without asking you. Here's a picture of a puppy to make up for it.**

Patton sent the picture of the tiny puppy that said it was sorry. Virgil had dubbed it "The Apology Puppy" because Patton used it whenever he thought he messed up.

_Roman helped set that up?_

**He only got Virgil out of the house. I did the rest.**

_You're sweet._

**Thank you ^w^ BTW do you know what alexithymia is, cuz you might have that.**

_Wow, look at that :D a word Patton knows that I don't! That will likely never happen again._

Patton smiled at the message.

**You're awful ;) Alexithymia is sometimes called emotional blindness. Most people lump it with autism, but there's lots of stuff it could lump with, or it could just be by itself. It's when you have a hard time knowing and expressing what feelings you are experiencing at any given moment. It means that you can't put words with emotions and it makes it hard to explain to other people what you're feeling. It can also make you hypersensitive to sight, sound, or physical touch. IDK why. I just know there's this adorable little girl with alexithymia at the hospital who plays with Inside Out dolls and uses them when she needs to tell us how she feels. I take it you do something similar.**

He waited. He had to help out tons of people that couldn't explain what was wrong. He knew what it was, and how to deal with it. He could help Logan learn how to deal with it.

_I do, Valerie helps me with that. I've never heard of this before. My parents actually thought I was autistic when I was little, until they found out that I only had trouble with emotions and not anything else. I'll have to look into this, tomorrow though. Thank you for talking with me for a few minutes, I'm finally tired. Goodnight, Patton._

**Goodnight, little jellybean. Hope you have wonderful dreams with unicorns and cotton candy clouds <3**

He turned his phone off and snuggled under the blankets. He was so happy and felt so squishy inside. He wanted to talk with him for hours, but he let Logan sleep. He needed rest if he was going to do a good job teaching tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [The Apology Puppy.](http://www.helpmefindlove.net/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/8-im-sorry-please-forgive-me-help-me-find-love.jpg)
> 
>  
> 
> [An article about Alexithymia](https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/mind-guest-blog/the-emotional-blindness-of-alexithymia/)
> 
>  I'm really sorry if the second part was confusing or hard to read. I tried to make it as easy as I could and I don't really know how I could improve it beyond adding the letter of their name in front of the text or a signature or something. I hate that so much, so that's why I didn't include it, but if you think it would make it easier to follow, I will edit that part to have something along those lines in it.
> 
> I have fallen down the BTS rabbithole. If anyone has any suggestions for songs, or other groups, please, dear god, tell me them all (or if you just want to talk about how pretty they are, I'm up for all of the above)


	11. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> [Forgive me father for I have sinned.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c4lCMa73r_I)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger Warning: More self harm talk, but not as intense as last time. More just trying to figure out what to do. There's also an extremely brief, blink-and-you-might-miss-it drug mention. Before the break is where all the sad stuff is, the second half is just Roman being a big, goofy idiot.

"Mom?" Roman stepped into his parents' bedroom. His mother sat on the bed, reading something with the cover showing a man with his shirt open holding a beautiful woman. She set her book down and turned to face her son with a smile.

"What's up?" She asked.

"I need help." He looked down at his feet, "It's about Virgil."

"Did you get in a fight?" She asked, she looked worried. Roman shook his head. His mom pat on the bed, Roman sat down.

"I found out he's been hurting himself. And he's only stopped for the past three months. This entire time he's been doing this and I haven't noticed." Roman explained. His mom hugged him. A small comfort, but comfort nonetheless.

"What did you do when you found out?" She asked him. 

"I tried to let him know how much I loved him. He was panicking, so I did my best to keep him calm. And I told him that I wanted to help him and explained what he could do if he ever wanted to try again." He said. The worst part of the situation was that he wasn't surprised, heartbroken, but not surprised.

"Well, it sounds like you did a really good job. How did he respond?" She was trying to gauge the situation, Roman knew that. It could help him more if he just went with it instead of protecting Virgil's privacy like he usually did.

"He was really closed in at first. I think he was scared of what I might do if I found out. When we started talking, he relaxed a little." Roman felt all the sadness bubbling back up, but he needed to keep it together long enough to find out if there was something else he could do.

"He didn't get mad at you for trying to help?" She asked. Roman shook his head.

"I think he was happy to have to help."

"Alright. Do you know if his dad knows?" She rubbed circles into his back. Roman shrugged. He didn't think to ask at the time. 

"What should I do?" Roman looked at her. He needed to be told if he was doing well, or if he needed to change something. He needed to know if he was doing everything in his power to make his princess happy.

"Be there for him, give him support. I'm here if he needs help, find out if his dad knows, and get him on board if he isn't already. The entire world doesn't have to know, but make sure he has enough people to hold him up whenever he needs it." She told him. Roman nodded, he would need to ask permission from Virgil before he could really get anyone else on board, asking his mom was probably too far without asking first, but he needed her help and there was no way in hell Virgil would want her to know. He'd be too concerned that she was worrying too much.

"Thank you, Mom." He hugged her. She smiled.

"Absolutely, I'm glad you wanted to talk about this. It's a big issue." She said. Roman stood up and left the room. He took out his phone and sent a text to Virgil.

_This might be really uncomfortable for you to answer but just remember that the only reason I'm asking is to help you. Does your dad know about the scars?_

He sent the text and waited for Virgil's response. He really didn't want to hurt him, but it might be required if he wanted to help in the long run.

 _Yes and no._ Was Virgil's reply. _He knows they're there and why, but only the ones on my arm. He thinks I stopped last year._

 _Is it okay if I tell him? I think he needs to know. Just in case I can't help for whatever reason, you would have some backup._ Roman explained to him. He didn't want to scare him away. 

As soon as he got the okay, he called Patton and did the best he could to make the situation clear. Patton was really broken up about it, but he promised to help as best he could. Roman told him not to confront him about hiding it away, just to offer support. Virgil didn't like the feeling of doing something wrong, even if he hadn't. 

What if Virgil was hiding other things from him? Roman didn't know what prompted the sudden thought, but it refused to leave his head. What if Roman was unintentionally hiding things from Virgil? Now that he was thinking about it, he was. Roman needed to tell him everything. He sat down and started to make a list. 

~*~

The next day the pair were sitting on Virgil's bed. His jacket was sitting at the foot of the bed, leaving his scarred arms bare and open. Roman was kneeling in front of him, he took his phone out to read off his list.

"Virgil, I am going to confess everything I've ever done and haven't told you about." He told him.

"Why?"

"I don't know. Yesterday I just realized that there's a lot that I haven't told you about, and I freaked out a little bit. I decided to at least lighten the load, so I made a list." He turned the screen towards Virgil to show him.

"Okay." Virgil was very obviously confused, "Go ahead."

"I can't drink Gatorade without spilling all over myself. Last week I tried to drink some water and forgot to open my mouth, so I drenched my shirt. Once a friend of mine convinced me to smoke pot with him and I got so high that I invented cold hot chocolate and thought I was a genius, the next morning I realized it was just chocolate milk. I never had anything to do with any sort of substance beyond caffeine before or since then. My very first crush was Danny Phantom. I wanted to fuck him way more than any eight year old boy wants to fuck anything, and I didn't even know what sex was. It was a weird time for me. I don't think Channing Tatum is attractive in the slightest, but he is really funny. I didn't read or watch Harry Potter until four years ago. I don't know what Naruto is and I'm too scared to ask at this point. Before we started dating, this girl at a party tried to blow me without knowing I was gay and I was too freaked out to stop her. She later described the experience as trying to play pool with a rope. I blamed it on whiskey dick, because there was alcohol at the party, even though I hadn't actually had any. I walked in on my parents once and made eye contact with my mom, it made the whole thing at least 10 times worse. There's this show called Oobi that's for children, and I watch it sometimes because it's nice to listen to. When I was six I memorized the Bill of Rights and the Decleration of Independance because I felt like it. And when I got my appendix removed and the pain meds made me really loopy. I tried to make myself canned soup, but for some reason I poured it on the floor and I got really emotional about it. So, my parents walked into the kitchen to see me curled in a ball, crying in a puddle of soup."

Virgil sat and blinked a couple times, "That's a lot of stuff, and none of it seemed worth it beyond being a funny story."

"Well, now you know." Roman said with a shrug.

"I didn't take you for someone who would ever smoke pot." Virgil was smiling, holding back laughter.

"Neither did I, until I did it. And now I know why I never thought I would, it's awful and not worth it." Roman sighed. 

"I guess it's my turn next." Virgil giggled and held his arms out. Roman crawled over and rested his head on his chest. 

"You don't have to, you could if you wanted. I just wanted to clear the air, not just between us, but in general." Roman said.

"I've been thinking about dying my hair for a while, maybe I should make it silver so you can live out your childhood Danny Phantom dreams." Virgil suggested with a laugh. Roman finally understood why Virgil liked having his head on Roman's chest, it sent vibrations all up and down his body and he loved it.

"I told you that my dream was to fuck him, you seem pretty confident in being able to do that. However, I seem to remember hearing that we could only do that before we're 18 if I can find your old stuffed animal in your room before Christmas. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you were just looking for an excuse to call off the deal." Roman teased. 

"If that's true, where is it?" Virgil asked. He was pleased with himself. 

"I don't know. The only things on your shelves are books and little knick knacks. Nothing stuffed but that bear I got you when we went to the arcade, and that doesn't count. And I think that's adorable that you still have that, by the way." Roman said, "You opened your dresser drawers, and the drawer in your nightstand earlier to look for your phone charger, so it's not in there. I did happen to see lotion, which could be for a lot of things, but I'm going to go ahead and think it's one thing in particular because it's my favorite to think about." Virgil blushed cherry red, "It's not on your bed, because we're on your bed. You looked in one of the tubs under your bed too, so there's two others. But they're clear, a terrible hiding spot. There's no more space under your bed, so that leaves your closet."

Roman stood up and opened his closet doors. Without doing too much digging, he looked through the little shelves inside. A lot of shoes (which Roman was surprised by since Virgil only wore one or two pairs), some sweatshirts that didn't fit in the dresser, and a polaroid camera, which was another surprise. He pulled it out and told Virgil to smile, snapping a picture. He took it out and handed it to Virgil to let it develop. But that was all, he closed the closet door. Roman groaned and sat back down on Virgil's lap, snuggling into him. Virgil smiled at his victory. He may have won this battle, but Roman would win the war.


	12. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan's basement floods.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little bit (read: very) sexual. If you're here for the fluff, this is not it. Feel free to sit out on this one if it makes you feel uncomfortable.
> 
> Kinks (A new thing for the sexy chapters so you all know what you're getting into):  
> Dom/sub  
> Masochism  
> Choking (Mentioned)  
> Cgl/Ddlb  
> Gags????? (This doesn't really count as a gag, but it prohibits speech, so I'm putting it down)  
> Aftercare

Logan was teaching his second period class, or trying to at least. It was really hard to tell kids about stoichiometry when all he could think about was Patton. First period was easy, it was just remembering his laugh, or the way that he lit up when he talked about things he liked. It was easy to push those thoughts out if he needed to, he could focus and still be happy. 

But for some reason, his brain reminded him of less innocent things. Patton's hands gliding down his stomach, pulling at his shirt. Lips and teeth at his neck. Patton's words from the night they made cupcakes together. He was still imagining the way Patton looked on top of him. He wanted it all so badly, but he was too afraid to pursue it. He wanted Patton to bite him until he bled. He wanted to be choked and slapped and used. 

And that was why he was having a hard time. Everything that he had done with Patton had created a near perfect fantasy for Logan and he was barely hanging on. The kids finally got their study time, which gave Logan an opportunity to sit and try to push away his intrusive ideas. 

"Excuse me, Mr. Sanders? Are you alright, you seem a little off today." Amy asked. She was a petite blonde girl. If Logan was up to date on the gossip he overheard in his classes, she was currently dating one of the boys in the choir. The asian one, with a voice like melted chocolate. 

"I'm fine. Just a little preoccupied with things I shouldn't be." Logan answered.

"Are you sure that's it, because you weren't acting like yourself at all." She tilted her head in concern.

"Positive, but it's distracting me to no end. After lunch it'll probably just be study time, because my head is not where it should be today." He tried to comfort her. It always warmed his heart when students showed genuine concern when they noticed something was wrong. 

"Alright, but make sure you take breaks too. I was in your class last year and you didn't miss a single day, try taking a day off if it keeps bothering you. It's obviously distracting you for a reason. Take your own advice for once." She said before walking away. 

Third period was only worse. Logan needed to hear Patton, even if it was just to talk about nothing. He just wanted to hear what he sounded like. The lunch bell rang and a few of his regulars started trickling in. He told them he had to step out for a personal call, but he'd be back in a few minutes. He left a quick note on the whiteboard and hurried to a secluded area of the school. He knew all the spots that kids never entered if they could help it. This one in particular was a shady spot, outside, behind the workshop classes. A little nook that most people weren't even aware of. Patton answered after two rings.

"Hi, Logan! Aren't you working?" His voice sounded on the other line. Logan relaxed almost instantly.

"It's lunch break. I just wanted to talk to you." He said.

"About?" Patton sounded confused.

"I don't know. You've been on my mind all day, and I've been going crazy, and I wanted to hear you talk to me." Logan explained, blushing. He was no better than the kids on the other side of the wall he was leaning against.

"Awe, you missed me." Patton said, "I could probably manage to head to your house after school if you wanted me to. Mind if I ask what's been bothering you?" 

"Uhm, I don't think I want to go into specifics. But we'll say that I've kind of been thinking more with my downstairs head instead of my upstairs head." Logan admitted uncomfortably. It took a few moments before a sudden sound of realization.

"That took me a second, but I got there." Patton's voice changed, just like it had back on Logan's kitchen counter, "If that's the case then I'll need you to be a good boy for the rest of the day. No cheating and giving the kids free days. If you can make it through the whole school day, I'll reward you. If not, you get punished. Do you understand?"

"Yes." He said without hesitation. He would be the best boy for Patton. 

"What a good little sub I've found. I'll be at your house after school gets out to see if you did a good job." Patton hung up the phone. Logan felt almost worse, but now he was determined to teach well to make Patton proud of him. He felt quieter, more willing to let things happen, eager to please. 

~*~

Logan saw Patton standing in the doorway and immediately pulled him inside, pulling his face down so he could kiss him. He didn't even care at this point, he just wanted to taste, and feel, and smell him. Patton pushed him off, making Logan whine like a puppy who'd lost his toy.

"I need to know if you listened before I can let you have good things." He smirked, "If I asked Virgil, what would he say you did in class today?"

"We studied stoichiometry." Logan told him, feeling ashamed he'd jumped on him like that.

"Tell me what that is." Patton commanded.

"It's used to find the amount of products needed for a reactant. Or vica versa." He explained, staring at the floor. 

"And you did that for your other classes too?" Patton asked, Logan nodded, "I'm going to have to trust you, but know that lying gets you punished. Now come over here with me."

Patton walked over to sit on the couch. Logan was going to sit with him, but was instead nudged to the ground on his knees between Patton's legs. 

"Tell me what I am to you when you're like this." Patton ordered, grabbing Logan's face with his hand.

"You're my daddy." Logan answered, he felt like an entirely different person, "Is that okay?"

"Did Daddy say you could speak after you answered?" Patton asked. Logan shook his head, "Then why did you?"

"I didn't know if Daddy thought it was weird. I wanted to make sure." Logan answered, staring at Patton's warm brown eyes. 

"Daddy would let you know if it was bad. Now come up here so you can get your reward for doing a good job. And let me know if you don't like something." Patton said. Logan moved up to sit on the couch, Patton pushed him down so he was flat on his back and kissed him, "What do you want me to do to you?"

"I want you to shove your dick down my throat so far I gag. I want you to bite me and suck so many bruises into my skin that I can't cover them up anymore. I want you to choke me until I'm bruised and lightheaded." Logan had no idea what he was doing, but he was loving every second. Patton was granting his second wish while Logan was still talking. He was suckling on his neck like his life depended on it. His hands were pulling the hem of his shirt up, exposing Logan's stomach and chest. He stuffed Logan's mouth with the cloth, forcing him to bite down on it to keep it up.

"No touching." Patton ordered before working open Logan's zipper. In seconds, Logan was in nothing but his boxers and the shirt he was wearing pulled up to his mouth. He wanted to move his hands away from the sides of his head to cover himself up, but he knew Daddy wouldn't like it so he kept them where they were. It only took a few moments of stillness before Patton attacked his tummy in kisses, scattering light nips over the pale skin. He repeated the process on his thighs before crawling back over Logan. He took the shirt out of his mouth so he could kiss him, only to return it to its place when he was done. He took off his own jeans and reached for the elastic of Logan's underwear. He hooked a finger in the waistband and looked at Logan to see if it was okay to take them off. Logan shook his head. He was ready for a lot, but not that quite yet. 

Patton let go and straddled Logan's hips. He carefully bucked his hips forward, sending a jolt through Logan's body. He whined around the cloth in his mouth. Patton's hands were roaming across his tummy as he rocked his hips. Logan was making more noise than he meant to, but Patton seemed to be gobbling it up, and it was all muffled by the shirt between his teeth anyway. He felt hot all over, and was starting to drift off into some other world full of nothing but friction and heat. Patton dug his nails into Logan's stomach, jerking him back to reality. He was slowly scratching down his belly, leaving angry red lines in his skin. Patton turned Logan's head to the side and attached himself to his neck once again.Way too soon, Logan felt a familiar pool of heat at the base of his gut.

"Can I please cum, Daddy?" Logan asked. He wasn't entirely sure why, but he needed to ask permission, "Please? I've been good all day long."

"Go on. Show me how pretty you are when you finish." Patton whispered in his ear. Logan whimpered and spilled into his underwear, staining them horribly. Patton began slowing down, letting Logan ride out his orgasm without making him overly sensitive. He was pressing soft kisses against his cheeks, bringing him back to reality. He gently pulled the shirt out of his mouth and let it fall back down.

Logan felt so small and helpless. Patton must've known that, since he slipped off his lap and hooked an arm under his head and knees to lift him up. Logan snuggled into his chest. Patton quietly asked which room was his bedroom, which Logan could only vaguely gesture at. Patton seemed to get to message since he walked in and set Logan down on the bed. Logan needed to suck on something, he needed something in his mouth. He stuck the collar of his shirt in his mouth just so he could have something, but Patton put an end to that rather quickly. Logan whined when he pulled it out of his mouth.

"Not that, okay? Do you know if you have popsicles or something? You can suck on those if you want." Patton explained to him quietly. Logan nodded, he always had popsicles, they were good and gave him something to do while he worked, "Is it okay if I leave to get you one? It'll only take a minute."

"Okay." Logan said. He really just wanted to be held, but he wanted something in his mouth more. 

"While I'm gone, can you change out of your dirty underwear, or do you need me to help?" Patton was stroking his cheek.

"I can do it." He said. He really hoped he could do it. 

"Alright, I'll be right back with a popsicle." Patton kissed his forehead and stood up. He helped Logan onto his feet too.

"Can I have a green one?" Logan asked, shyly.

"Of course you can. You should change your shirt too, this one's all wet." Patton told him before leaving the room. 

Logan did as he was told and changed his clothes. He had no clue why he felt so little, or why he couldn't think of another word for it. He knew that after really intense sex, you needed to take care of your partner and make sure they were okay. But what they just did wasn't that intense, and Logan wasn't even sure if it counted as sex. The worst thing that had happened were the scratches on his tummy, which still stung, but it wasn't that bad. Maybe it was how dominating Patton ended up being? He wasn't really sure, all he knew was that it was taking a really long time for Patton to come back. He resorted to sucking on his fingers. His new clothes were soft on his skin, and he did feel significantly less sticky. 

When Patton finally came back, Logan whined and reached for him. He pulled Logan's fingers out of his mouth and kissed him softly. He pulled away and grabbed Logan's hands, the one wet with saliva had been wiped dry on the sheets. He carefully wrapped his fingers around the popsicle stick and brought the treat to his lips.

"Maybe I'll buy you something to suck on if this keeps up, but for now this is okay, right?" Patton ran his fingers through his hair. Logan pulled at his shirt at get him to sit with him. Patton smiled and sat on the bed, holding out his arms for Logan. He curled up on his Daddy's chest and sucked at the green-flavored ice in his mouth. Patton wrapped his arms around him and pulled him closer. 

Logan felt safe, and loved. He wanted nothing more than to stay here forever, but by the time he had finished his popsicle, he was back to normal and Patton had to leave. When he left, Logan got up to check his reflection. Purple blotches covered the entire side of his neck, even beginning to creep up his jaw and down his collarbone. This was going to be a disaster to try and cover up. He picked up his phone and called Valerie, maybe she could help out a little bit with makeup.


	13. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil's turn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some talk about collars ahead, but it's not sexual and it stays pretty vanilla. Nothing that hasn't already been mentioned before. There's also some joky talk about pet play. Again, a mild self-harm mention.

Virgil had finished his list last night. Now he was standing in front of Roman, very similarly to the other day. 

"What are you doing?" Roman tilted his head.

"Returning the favor." Virgil shrugged. He looked down at his list.

"Well, I guess, go ahead." He leaned back and let him talk.

"When I was a kid I really wanted to be a princess when I grew up, and I really wanted all the little Disney costumes and the shoes and the tiaras and stuff. I never brought it up since I thought it was weird, but my dad did get me a Barbie one year for my birthday when he saw me staring at it. When I was 6, I pulled an all nighter by mistake and fell asleep in my cereal like in cartoons. The full list of all my mental health problems is depression, panic disorder, social anxiety, insomnia, OCD, chronic migraines, but that one isn't really mental health, and I used to be anorexic. The last one is an ongoing recovery process, but I'm getting somewhere, which is good. For some reason, there's an itty bitty voice in the back of my mind telling me that you're playing some really elaborate practical joke on me, even though I know that's not true. I actually really love K-Pop, and it's the one thing that no one can know about me, but I'm sharing all my secrets so now you know. I used to have a massive crush on Zuko from Avatar. I still watch Winnie-the-Pooh, I firmly believe he could be the solution for world peace. I have a weird desire to watch 50 Shades of Grey. Not as like a fantasy thing, or a sex thing. I'm just genuinely curious about it, and I don't feel like reading the book. I really want to either pierce or tattoo almost every inch of my body, but I'm terrified to actually do it. I've never seen Star Wars. I think the Kardashians and Jenners are actually pretty impressive. I've always wanted to wear a corset, just to see what it's like. And my last one is that once when I was little, I was afraid of dogs. I did get over that fear eventually."

Roman held his hands out to invite Virgil to his lap. When Virgil straddled his hips, Roman kissed his temple and took a notebook and pen from the nightstand.

"I'm going to write down everything you said you wanted to do so I can help you do that." Roman told him. He scribbled a list on the paper, tore it out of the notebook, and handed it to Virgil to read. Virgil smiled and hugged him. 

_Stuff to do w/ Virgil_  
_Watch 50SoG_  
_Turn him into a Princess ___  
_Pierce/Tattoo something_  
_Watch Star Wars_  
_Put him in a corset_

"We can add to the list if we think of other things." Roman said, "Want to cross something off now?"

"Why not? Let's do it." Virgil shrugged and laughed.

"Okay, we'll need your dad for piercings and tattoos, so not that yet. I don't own a corset, so that'll be a problem. Making you a princess will require a shopping trip, so we could do that if we wanted, but I think you'd rather stay here. So do you want to watch 50 Shades of Grey, or Star Wars?"

"Let's do Star Wars. I really don't want any parents walking in on us watching 50 Shades of Grey." Virgil said.

"Good call. We have all the Star Wars episodes already, so that won't be an issue." Roman shrugged, "The first one is pretty boring until the end though, so watching the first two would be a good idea."

He picked Virgil up and carried him downstairs. He put the first movie in and snuggled next to Virgil on the couch. Virgil watched intently. Han Solo showed up on screen, and by the time he had left, Virgil had chosen his favorite character. Roman was gently scratching at Virgil's scalp, making him sigh and purr.

"I love my little kitten so much." Roman kissed the top of his head softly. Maybe Virgil was more like a cat than he would like to admit. Then, Roman did something he hadn't ever really done before. He lightly pulled on Virgil's hair, forcing his head to the side. His lips were ghosting over his skin, occasionally pressing down and leaving little kisses. That's when they started stepping out of their comfort zone. Roman started dragging his teeth over his pale skin. In a few choice locations, he would bite down a little harder and suck lightly. He was being just barely rough enough to turn his skin angry and red, but there would be no trace after a few minutes. Virgil was letting out little whimpers, trying to stay quiet in case Roman's parents heard him.

"Careful there," Virgil managed to get out through quiet pants, "Can't do anything without that stuffed animal you so desperately want to find."

"Wasn't planning on it." Roman said, "Just wanted to know how pretty you sounded."

Virgil whined and shifted his weight. Roman pulled his shirt back and nipped at his collarbone. Virgil sucked in a gulp full of air and made his boyfriend giggle. He wanted to grind down on whatever was beneath him, but he couldn't and he was pissed off. Roman learned that his clavicle was sensitive and began to focus most of his efforts there, turning Virgil into a whimpering mess. Roman finally let up, returning to kissing him. He pulled back, his hazel eyes were dilated and looked so awake and about to fall asleep all at once.

"We should get back to the movie." Roman whispered, still close enough that Virgil could feel his breath against his face. 

"Yeah, probably." Virgil shrugged, pecking his lips one more time. 

"I love you." Roman told him.

"I love you too." Virgil said, trying to turn his attention back to the movie.

They finished the movie without another incident. Whether that was a good thing or bad thing was still to be determined.

"Oh, I just remembered something." Roman said, he pulled Virgil to his feet and brought him back up to his room. He picked up a little white shopping bag and handed it to Virgil, "I got this for you."

Virgil rolled his eyes and pulled one of the tissue paper wrapped bundles out of the bag. He carefully pulled the paper off and saw the black headband. Wire was bent into a triangle on either side making cat ears. Black lace was wrapped around the ears. He closed his eyes, not knowing whether to blush and hide his face or laugh.

"I told you I was getting you one." Roman said, taking it from his hands and slipping it into Virgil's hair, "Look at you, you're so cute."

"Let me guess, the other thing in this bag is my collar." Virgil said, already unwrapping it. Sure enough, a collar. But not what Virgil would usually call a collar, more a choker. A strip of black velvet with a clasp in the back. A massive rhinestone was attached to the front. It was actually kinda cute.

"Did I pick out a good one?" Roman asked. Virgil nodded, he liked it a lot more than he thought he would, "Can I put it on?"

Virgil nodded, now blushing. Roman carefully wrapped it around his neck and clipped it together in the back. It fit snuggly around his throat. He felt a sense of belonging that he didn't know he wanted. He loved it so much. Roman was stroking his cheek softly, Virgil nuzzled into his palm. 

"What do you think?" Roman asked.

"I actually like it a lot, but where would I possibly wear either of these?" Virgil asked, "I can't wear them to school, and that's the only place I really go."

"When I take you out places, to performances, on dates, to get that weird drink you like with the jello balls in it-"

"Boba tea." Virgil reminded him.

"You knew what I meant. You could wear it as a stereotypical halloween costume. We could put you in fishnets and a really little skirt." Roman said.

"Absolutely not." Virgil shook his head.

"Don't worry I was mostly joking." Roman kissed his nose.

"Mostly?"

"Well, I was joking about the Halloween part. However, I would not be opposed to seeing that costume." Roman explained.

"Oh god, is this some kink of yours? You want me to be your Momo?" Virgil asked.

"Is that from the boobs game you got really obsessed with?" Roman asked. Virgil nodded and shrugged.

"You wanna be my master, I'm just a stray kitty that wants a master." Virgil spoke with a fake high pitched voice and bat his eyelashes at Roman, "Master, I want fishies. I promise I'll take really good care of them. I won't eat them because they're my pets and you don't eat pets."

Roman was blushing, hiding his face in his hands. Virgil saw this as a victory, but he wasn't done yet.

"I love my master lots and lots and I want him to pet me and love me and feed me." Virgil said. He took a breath so he could keep going, but he was silenced by Roman's lips on his and his hands on his face. 

"Shut up and let me look at how cute you are." Roman told him. Virgil shut his mouth and stood still. Roman was peppering kisses over his cheeks.

~*~

Virgil was just about to head out when Roman's mom pulled him aside. His anxiety spiked up. What did he do wrong? She was going to tell him she didn't want her son to date him. He knew it. He did something bad. He ran through everything that she could possibly know about, trying to find something he did that he usually didn't. He kept coming out empty handed, but there had to be something, why else would she be talking with him?

"You're not in trouble, Virgil. You can calm down." She told him. Virgil did not calm down, "I don't know if you know this, but Roman told me about the scars. He was just looking for some advice, that's all."

"Oh, he didn't tell me." Virgil said. He didn't mind really, he understood. It didn't make him relax any.

"I just want you to know that I'm here if you need anything. Phil doesn't know, but I'm sure he's got your back too if you need it." She smiled at him. Virgil wasn't sure what came over him, but he hugged her.

"Thank you for being the closest thing to a mom I have." Virgil said. She hugged him back, rubbing circles into his back. 

"You're part of our family now, I have to be a good mom to you." She said. Virgil felt so loved and happy, he was so lucky.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Cat ears](https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/7c/d5/fc/7cd5fcdd9d23b6022234806050eae1d0.jpg)   
>  [Choker](https://ae01.alicdn.com/kf/HTB1bSZgIpXXXXXEXXXXq6xXFXXXo/SRCOI-Fashion-Black-Choker-Necklace-With-Clear-Rhinestone-Charms-Gothic-Silver-Plated-Velvet-Choker-Collar-Necklace.jpg)
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> [Momo](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBSzbXanWb8&oref=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DYBSzbXanWb8&has_verified=1) (Note that this is from a dating sim game called HuniePop and does get very NSFW. It's also a very long video, but you son't have to watch the whole thing to get the jokes.)


	14. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Birthday boy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The second half does contain some important discussion about sex that every sexually active couple should have. If reading about that bothers you, first half is clean, second half you should sit out for. Also, a sneak peak at a little Logan.

Patton knocked on the door, rocking on his heels, gift in one hand, cupcakes in the other. Logan opened the door and blinked. After a moment, he smiled and invited him inside. Patton may have decided to surprise his boyfriend on his birthday and not told him that he was coming over. He enveloped him in a hug and kissed his cheek, wishing him a happy birthday as he did so. Valerie was standing in the kitchen. Patton waved to her and set his bundles on the counter. 

"Is only Valerie here?" Patton asked. Logan nodded, "Why?"

"Because I don't like making a big deal out of my birthday, and I'm celebrating with my family in a few days anyway." Logan explained with a shrug.

"I'll make a big deal for you then. Now come here and open your present." Patton kissed his cheek. Logan picked up the little package and started tearing of the paper, "It's not anything really big, but I hope you like it."

Logan opened up the brown box and took out a black mug covered in white dots. It looked like a sky. Patton took it from him and brought it to the sink. He turned up the water as high as it would go and filled up the mug. When it was full, he set it on the counter and let Logan and Valerie both watch as pictures started to appear, creating constellations out of the stars. Logan smiled as he watched it.

"Do you like it?" Patton asked, Logan nodded and hugged him. Valerie was grinning at them. Patton carefully picked him up and set him on the counter before turning to Valerie, "I don't think I ever found out your relationship with Logan."

"I'm his cousin and socializing advisor. And you're the boyfriend he never shuts up about." Valerie said. Logan held his face in his hands, but Patton only thought about how cute that was. 

"Really?" He beamed at Logan.

"Oh yeah, I feel like I know you without having ever met you besides that little conversation we had before you went out with Logan." She said. Patton was so happy about that, he was so precious. 

"I don't talk about him that much." Logan said, pulling at the hem of his shirt. His face was bright red.

"Don't lie, Lo. Once you talked about him for an hour without me saying a word." She said.

"That was just the one time." He stared at his lap. Patton hugged him and peppered his face in kisses.

"That's adorable, jelly baby, you're so cute." He said. Logan just turned redder. Patton loved him so much.

"I'm gonna go grab another soda, I'll be back." Valerie left and went into the garage.

"About the other day. I didn't realize until you left that you didn't get to finish and I feel awful." Logan said quietly to him.

"Don't. It was for you anyway, I don't care." Patton shrugged.

"I still feel like a need to make it up to you somehow," Logan said, "And whatever happened afterwards was really weird and I don't really get it, or know what it was or why, or anything really."

"I know what it was and why, it's okay. We can talk about it when she leaves. If I have to leave before her, then we can talk over the phone. Does that sound good?" He asked. Logan nodded and Patton kissed him. Valerie came back in and they all talked with each other until Patton decided it was time for cupcakes. He passed them out and they were about to dig in when Valerie made them stop and wait. She dug around in the cupboards and pulled out a little box of birthday candles and a lighter. She stuck one in Logan's cupcake and lit it. Patton insisted they sing to him before he was aloud to blow out the candle, because it was his birthday and that's what you do on birthdays. Finally, they let Logan take a bite. His eyes got big and round and he quickly took another bite.

"How many of these can I eat, Patton? They're incredible." He said with a mouthful of cake and frosting.

"As many as you want. I made them for you." Patton said. 

"Logan, you hate sweets." Valerie said.

"I don't care." He shook his head, "Eat it."

She took a bite and nearly moaned. Patton always loved watching people eat his food, they would love it so much and it always made them so happy. He was always tinkering with old recipes, and this one in particular was very near perfect. He watched as Logan inhaled two more. It was a wonder he didn't eat the wrappers along with the rest of it. When Valerie did leave, she took another three home with her, she was eating one before she even got to her car.

"Now that she's gone, can we just talk things over?" Logan asked.

"Of course, let's sit." Patton brought him over, "First, do you have any questions."

"A few." Logan shrugged, Patton gestured for him to start talking, "The one at the front of my mind, is what the hell happened to me?"

"It's called sub-space or head-space, depending on how you feel it could also be called little space. It usually happens after something sexual that involves a dominant, or dom, which is me. My job after that happens is to take care of you until you come back up. It can be really bad if I don't." He explained. Logan nodded as he spoke, "It seems that you might have a bit of a thing for sucking in sub-space, so we should probably get something for you to suck on if you want to continue with this."

"That was actually my next two questions. What were you planning on having me suck on? And, what if I'm a little freaked out by this?" Logan shifted.

"To your first question, I have ideas, some a little weirder than others, so we can talk about that in a minute. To your second question, do you want to be more vanilla? Do you want to not be sexual at all? Some? Because those all have different answers." Patton said. Logan's happiness was his first priority, he needed to make sure that was taken care of.

"It's just very new, I've never done this before, and I don't really know how to respond. I know I enjoy it, but I guess I'm a little scared to go all the way right now. I want to ease into it." Logan told him. It was obvious he was uncomfortable, Patton guessed it was embarrassment. That was understandable, Patton stood up and went to get a cupcake from the kitchen. He reminded him to eat it slowly and sat back down. Food would help calm his nerves a little, especially food he liked.

"Alright, there's three ways we could go about that. We could stop completely until you tell me you're okay with having sex. I could only go as far as you feel comfortable with and not push at all. Or I could push your boundaries a little bit, with this one you have to be okay telling me if you need to stop. Which one of those sounds the best to you?" Patton said. Logan held up three fingers. Patton nodded.

"One more question. You don't seem to be freaking out at all. I don't think you've ever been in a relationship with another man, aren't you confused, or having a sexuality crisis, or anything?" Logan tilted his head.

"No, you're still a person. Just because you have different Lego pieces than what I'm used to doesn't make you any less of a person. I don't know a lot about the different names and stuff, but I know that this doesn't bother me. If you were a sheep or a dog or a tiger or something, I would be freaking out, but you're not any of those things so I'm fine." Patton shrugged. All he knew was gay, straight, and bisexual, which he was told was just being confused, and he wasn't any of those things, and he was probably wrong about being bisexual anyway.

"Remind me to teach you about all the different sexualities and genders." Logan said. Patton nodded, "I think that's all the questions I have for now. What about the oral fixation?"

"One of these is a little weird, okay? So feel free to turn it down if you don't feel comfortable with it. We could stick to the popsicles, but we'll have an issue if we run out. We could get you one of those necklaces that you chew on. Or we could get you a pacifier." Patton said, turning a little red at the last one. Logan was blushing so hard he forgot to move, or speak, or breathe it seemed, "I'll just forget I ever brought that one up."

"No, I'm a little taken back is all. Is it okay if we maybe get both and see?" He was very quiet. 

"If that's what you want, then we can do that." Patton smiled, trying to make Logan a little more at ease. He nodded a little bit, "What are your limits for me right now?"

"I don't want you touching me down there yet. I might be able to touch you, but absolutely not the other way around." Logan said. 

"Alright, what are you going to tell me if I go too far?" 

"Cantaloupe?" Logan asked more than stated.

"Okay, if you can't talk, bang on something twice. If either of those things happen, everything stops." Patton said. Logan nodded his head, "That's all I think for the safety part. I'll assume you don't have any STDs I should be worried about." Logan shook his head, "Awesome. Anything I should avoid, or really emphasize? Any fantasies you want help bringing to life?"

"Nothing with peeing, fecal matter, and also, feet are very weird to me. I've told you I like choking, which I didn't know I liked until a few days ago. Same story with the gagging. Other than that, I guess it's just a matter of trial and error. And there's one thing that I've always wanted to do, but I kind of want to keep it to myself for a while."

"Then I think that's about everything, besides rules, if you want rules, if you do they can wait for another day." Patton kissed his forehead. Something changed about Logan, Patton wasn't sure what, but it was something. 

"I want all of Daddy's rules. I wanna be a good baby for Daddy." Logan said, wrapping his arms around his neck. Patton switched his way of thinking to accommodate.

"Don't worry, you'll be such a good baby for Daddy. And guess what, it's your birthday today. Do you want to go to the toy store and pick out a new stuffie?" Patton asked. Logan lit up and nodded, "Then we should go get you a new stuffie."

He stood up to take him to the toy store.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Very important. Everyone needs to watch.](http://babyanimalgifs.tumblr.com/post/161554254376/babyanimalgifs-i-hope-this-cheers-you-up-via)


	15. Roman

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Very depressed, sad Virgil. Lots of self-depreciation, lots of internalized homophobia, lots of really not fun. The second half has nothing triggering that I can think of (Besides drawn on stitches, but that's not really anything)

Roman was woken up by his phone ringing. It was still pitch black in his room, the only light coming from the screen of his cell phone. He saw that it was Virgil calling and instantly answered the phone.

"Is everything alright, my princess? Are you okay?" He asked, his voice still half asleep.

"No." Virgil sounded like he was crying, "I need it so badly. Please let me." 

"What are you talking about, Virgil. You need what so badly?" Roman was praying that Virgil wasn't telling him what he thought he was.

"I need to get rid of it all, I need to hurt." Virgil sobbed. Roman's heart shattered into a thousand pieces.

"Can you tell me why?" Roman tried to be gentle with his words.

"Because I'm so fucked up. Why am I like this?" Virgil asked.

"Why are you like what?"

"Why do I like boys? It's wrong. I'm broken. I'm a mistake. This shouldn't happen." He cried over the phone.

"Oh, princess. You're not a mistake, no one is a mistake. Maybe you're a little broken, but that's okay, so am I, so is your dad, so is everyone. If liking boys is wrong and a mistake, then I think you need to have a word with foxes, lions, bats, giraffes, ducks, elephants, dolphins, goats, and even cats. And that's just the beginning of the list. It's not weird." Roman told him. He still heard crying sounds.

"Boys that like other boys are being killed all over Russia." Virgil said.

"You know who else killed boys that liked boys? Hitler. Was he right about anything to do with people that weren't him?" Roman asked.

"No." Virgil said. 

"Then why do you think it's what you deserve when someone else is doing to same thing to people that he did?" 

"I don't know." He muttered, "But I know that I do."

"Do I deserve that?" Roman asked him.

"No, not at all."

"So why do you deserve it?"

"I don't know."

"Princess, you know I take care of you like you're my baby, right? And that you're your dad's baby?" Roman asked.

"Yeah."

"Please don't hurt my baby. Don't cut him open, don't starve him, don't try to kill him. Because I love my baby with all my heart, and I want him to be okay. I want to make him happy. I still have an entire list of things to do with him, don't make me have to forget I ever had that list." Roman begged. Virgil cried harder.

"I don't want to, but I have to. I have to do it. Because I'm wrong." Virgil said.

"irgil, do you think your dad could ever do anything remotely wrong, or bad, or awful?" Roman asked.

"He's wrong a lot, but no." Virgil said. Roman was about to do something drastic, and maybe a little bit awful, but he needed to do it. 

"I want you to go wake him up and ask him about who he's dating right now?" Roman told him.

"Why?"

"Trust me. If you want you can take the phone with you and I can ask for you." Roman said. A few moments later Virgil was waking his dad up and telling him briefly what was going on. Virgil put him on speaker phone. Patton said hi in a sleepy voice.

"Virgil said you have a question to ask me." He yawned.

"I do. But first, Virgil. You believe that you are bad unless you are dating a woman. Right?" He asked. Virgil hummed in agreement, "And you also believe that your dad can never be bad. Right?" Another quiet affirmation, "Alright, Patton, are you currently dating a woman?"

"What?" Patton asked.

"Just answer the question." There was a pause.

"No, I am not dating a woman."

"What?" Virgil asked, obviously confused.

"I'm not dating a woman. I've been seeing a man for a little more than a month now. And he's incredible." Patton told his son, "I didn't want to tell you because I thought you would feel like I stabbed you in the back or something. You were so afraid to tell me about Roman that I didn't want you to think that it was worthless worrying, I don't know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"You have a boyfriend?" 

"Yeah." Patton said.

"Roman, can I let you go? I want to talk to my dad." He asked.

"Of course, I'll come over tomorrow morning to see you, okay?"

"Yeah, okay." Virgil sniffled and hung up. Roman turned off his phone and fell back asleep.

~*~

Roman knocked on the front door. Patton opened it up and invited him inside. He was still in his pajamas, actually, so was Roman.

"How did last night go? I hope I didn't upset you or anything. I only brought it up because he needed someone to help him, and nothing I was doing was working." Roman explained to him.

"No, don't worry about that. I really needed to tell him anyway. And this way, when Logan and I do tell him, maybe it'll be less of a shock to him. I'm hoping so, anyway." Patton smiled, "And here, you can have this."

Patton handed him a little metal key.

"Is this to your house?" Roman asked. Patton nodded, "Yeah, we talked about it last night and we both want you to have it. Virgil is still in bed, I'm going to get ready for work."

Roman thanked him and slipped the key into his pocket. He walked upstairs and opened the door to his room. Virgil was laying on top of the blankets, his arm was covered in colorful doodles. Roman sat next to them and inspected the pictures. He had sectioned his arm into 3 parts with thick, dark lines crossed with other, smaller lines, like he was stitched together with Sharpie. There was one ring above his elbow, another created an oval around the middle of his forearm, and the third was around his wrist. It seemed like each section had it's own theme. The back of his hand was patterned. Thin lines ran across his skin, splitting it into triangular sections. Each triangle had its own pattern, polkadots, stripes, lattice patterns, herringbone, paisley, everything in every color of the rainbow.

His lower forearm was little cartoons. A knight rescuing a princess on a stone tower from a fire breathing dragon. A smiling dinosaur curled around another little dinosaur like a mother protecting her baby. A watering can next to a patch of flowers. A balloon and a cactus frowning next to each other. A broken heart was drawn between the two. There were little drawings of characters. Some that Roman recognized, like the Powerpuff girls, Cosmo and Wanda, Dexter from Dexter's lab, Stewie Griffin, and Kermit the frog. And some he didn't, like the man with wild hair, lethargic eyes, and a smile larger than the rest of his face that was filled with crooked teeth. The man wore a green suit and a purple tie. Around him were the words _I said my name is Fred, and I've been...very naughty._ Another was a red cat with a pointed face. There was a cow with a chicken, a pair of rats,  
one with an obscenely large head, the other with a skinny body and large eyes. Three little creatures all standing with each other, one in a red hat, one in a little skirt, and the third in a pair of khaki pants. Another one showed a woman with dark hair parted down the middle, and a neckline so low it was a wonder she kept anything in place. She was cutting roses just below where the buds began, leaving just the stem.

His upper forearm was lovely drawings of roses and stars. Cotton candy, ice cream, and candy. Covered in images of objects. Roman assumed that it was things Virgil associated with happiness. Planets, rocket ships, racecars. Crowns, flowers, unicorns. It was beautiful and Roman sat and absorbed every image. Virgil shifted and opened his eyes.

"Good morning, my princess. I came over to see if you were alright." He said quietly.

"I'm okay, I colored pictures and calmed down." Virgil yawned.

"I was just looking at them. I like her." He pointed to the woman with the roses.

"That's Morticia Addams. She's my favorite." He explained sleepily, "Dad had all the episodes on DVD and we would watch them when I was sick and had to stay home from school. Fester would put light bulbs in his mouth and they would light up. Wednesday had a doll with no head. Pugsley would steal road signs. Gomez had a toy train."

He snuggled up against Roman's chest.

"I think we could find some episodes still, wanna watch some with me?" He asked.

"Sure." Roman nodded. Virgil nuzzled against his shoulder, trying to get closer. They settled in together, and watched the old show.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The characters on Virgil's arm that Roman doesn't recognize are:  
> [Freaky Fred from Courage the Cowardly Dog](https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&ved=0ahUKEwi7np3ugbXUAhUM74MKHQkbD1oQjBwIBA&url=https%3A%2F%2Fvignette3.wikia.nocookie.net%2Fvillains%2Fimages%2Fd%2Fde%2FFreaky_Fred.PNG%2Frevision%2Flatest%3Fcb%3D20130531141217&psig=AFQjCNHHsb0DNi4NPktILH0htAnYhn9k-g&ust=1497243689169569)  
> [Katz from Courage the Cowardly Dog](https://vignette3.wikia.nocookie.net/villains/images/d/d4/Mr._Katz.png/revision/latest?cb=20140427221202)  
> [Cow and Chicken](http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/nvtelen.JPG)  
> [Pinky and the Brain](http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/looneytunes/images/8/86/Pinky_%26_The_Brain_Wallpaper.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20121124222722)  
> [Animaniacs](http://17rg073sukbm1lmjk9jrehb643.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/animaniacs2.jpg)


	16. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pink and blue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I couldn't fit every single thing in here, but I think it's a decent list. If you know of something I didn't add let me know in the comments and I'll make a list for everyone.

Logan wasn't exactly sure how he ended up with a stuffed penguin and a pacifier, but now he had them. He was sitting on the couch with Patton, snuggled up against his chest. He still didn't know why Patton wasn't freaking out, he decided the best way to find out would be to bring it up again. 

"Do you want to find a name for your sexuality or do you not care?" Logan asked.

"Well, it would still be good to know the names of everything even if I don't know what I am." Patton said, "Can you teach me. And about the transsexual stuff too, that's very confusing to me."

"Don't use transsexual. It's outdated and a lot of people find it offensive. Use trans or transgender instead, unless someone tells you to call them transsexual, then that's okay." Logan explained. Patton nodded, "I'll be right back."

He walked down to his basement and grabbed a tub of markers he knew he had. He came back upstairs and sat down with his markers. He handed Patton a blue marker.

"This is you." He said, "You want to find a marker to hug and kiss and snuggle. With me so far?"

"Yes. I'm the blue marker." He grinned. Logan nodded and picked up a few pink markers.

"Good. Let's start out really easy and say that you only want to hug and kiss and snuggle pink markers. It doesn't really matter what kind of pink, as long as it's pink. Maybe you like lighter pink, maybe darker, but it's always pink." Logan said, holding out his handful of pink markers, "That called being heterosexual, or straight. The same is true if you were a pink marker that only liked blue markers."

"Obviously I'm not that." Patton giggled. Logan shook his head and put his markers back. This time he grabbed a bunch of blue markers.

"Now, let's say the same is true, but with blue markers. That's called homosexual, or gay. This is what I am, and also what Virgil is, and Roman. Again, if a pink marker only likes pink markers it's the same thing. Sometimes that's called lesbian, but some people don't like being called that word, they like gay instead." Logan explained. He figured it was all stuff that Patton already knew, but he went over it anyway. In case there was any confusion or just to teach him how this analogy worked.

"Okay. I'm not that either." Patton said. Logan picked his pink markers back up and added them to his pile of blue markers.

"This is where it gets a little more complicated. Let's say that you like both pink markers and blue markers. You might like pink markers a little more, or vica versa, but you still like both. That's called bisexuality, usually shortened to just bi. There's a lot of people that say this is wrong, or made up, or they're confused, or too afraid to be gay. That's not true, they really do like pink and blue markers. If you're a bisexual blue marker and you marry a pink marker, you're still bisexual. It doesn't make you straight." Logan said. There was so much confusion around bisexuality that he tried to dispel any incorrect thoughts in Patton's head.

"Maybe that one." He frowned. He really was trying to figure himself out.

"You don't need a label you know." Logan told him.

"But I want one. I don't want to just exist, I want to be something." Patton said.

"Well, we still have a few more. Don't panic if you don't know." Logan kissed him. Patton nodded. This time Logan dropped all the markers into the bucket and mixed them up. He grabbed a handful of whatever markers he happen to grab. Green, orange, purple, red, yellow, black, all alongside the pink and blue. 

"What's that?" Patton smiled a little at the rainbow in his hands.

"It's called pansexuality. There's more colors than just pink and blue, they're all still just markers after all. What's the difference besides their color? Same with people. There's more than just boy and girl, and pansexuals want to hug and kiss and snuggle people, without really caring what color or gender they are. They still might like one color better than the rest, but they're not going to turn down anyone because they're green or purple or blue." Logan said, his hands were filled with art supplies. Patton's eyes lit up.

"That one." He nodded, "I'm that."

"Do you want me to keep going? Or are you happy just being pan?" Logan asked.

"Keep going, I'm having fun." Patton smiled. He gripped his marker and shifted his weight a little. He set his markers down for now.

"Alright. There's queer which just means you're not straight. You could be gay, or pan, or something without a name. And there's asexuality, all it means is that you have no sexual attraction whatsoever. That doesn't mean they don't have sex or that they don't enjoy it, it just means that they don't think about things as being sexually appealing. Aromantic is the same thing, but with romantic attraction. They don't want a relationship, they like being friends, possibly friends with benefits, but not a romantic partner. Demisexual and demiromantic are the same things but they do find this sexually or romantically appealing once there's an emotional attachment. Does all that make sense?" Logan asked.

"Kind of, but mostly because I have no idea what that would be like." Patton shook his head, "Just keep going."

Logan picked up two markers with black tubes so you had to look at the lid to know what color it was. One was pink, one was blue. He switched the caps on them. He grabbed a piece of paper that was sitting on his coffee table. He picked up a different blue marker with a black tube and handed it to Patton.

"So we're into the different genders now. First is cisgender. To us it's blue. Color with it and see what color it really is." He watched as Patton scribbled on the paper with blue ink, "That's what it means it be cisgender. It looks blue and it also colors blue. I'm cis, I'm pretty sure you're cis too."

Patton agreed. Logan picked up the other marker with the blue cap.

"What color do you think will end up being?" Logan asked him.

"Blue." Patton said. Logan handed him the marker and let him scribble on the paper, "It's pink."

"That's what being transgender is. So just because you think it's blue, doesn't mean it is. To be really specific, this would be a trans woman, because she's pink even if she has a blue cap. Most of the time, they try and make their cap look more pink. They do this with hormones, buying feminine clothes and stuffing them to give them a more feminine looking body, and even surgeries. And yes, there is more than one. I actually have a very good friend named Rose who's a trans girl. If you have questions she would be better to ask than me. But there's also trans men." Logan gave him the marker with the pink cap and had him draw, "It's blue. It's almost the same thing, but backwards. I don't know any trans men for you to ask though." 

"I hope all of them are okay and happy. That sounds so hard. I don't want people to think I'm pink, imagine know that everyone thinks you're pink when you're not. Logan, will they all be okay" Patton looked up at him. Logan shook his head.

"They're dying. They're either being killed or killing themselves because they're different. A lot of them are happy, but not all of them. Some of them get kicked out of their homes, or denied jobs because of the way they are." Logan said, he couldn't lie to him. Patton started tearing up.

"I gotta help them." He said, "What can I do?"

"Be nice to them and if someone is mean, tell them what they did wrong." Logan said. Patton nodded.

"They are all my best friends now." He said, "You can keep going now."

"There's genderfluid, they change colors."

"Like magic?" Patton asked.

"Kind of." Logan just went with it, "Genderqueer just means not cis. Bigender is pink and blue at the same time. Agender is like a black marker. It doesn't have a color. And finally, there's intersex. It used to be called hermaphrodite, but that word is now very offensive and you shouldn't use it. It means that they have pink parts and boy parts."

"That's so cool." He smiled, "And now I know what I am. I'm pansexual."

"Yeah." Logan laughed at his excitement. It was cute, and endearing. Patton tackle hugged him, knocking him over, and covered his face in kisses.

"Wait, if you're rainbow, what am I?" He sat up, now on Logan's lap. Logan googled the pan pride flag and showed him a picture, "It's so cute and pretty and I love it. I want a something with that on it because it's adorable."

Logan laughed and looked up t shirts he could buy his boyfriend. Patton picked one out that showed a black and white drawing of a girl with hair colored like the flag. _Pride_ was written over by the right side. He ordered that along with a bracelet which had black thread woven to a circle in the center with the flag. Patton smiled and kissed him.

"I could've bought it myself you know." Patton said.

"I know, but I wanted to buy you something." Logan told him, "You should keep kissing me."

"Okay." Patton brought their lips back together. They kissed for what seemed like forever before Patton finally sat up. He adjusted them so he could lay behind Logan and snuggle with him. He left little careful kisses over his neck and pulled him in close. Logan was enveloped in warmth and adoration and he needed to tell Patton. Was two and a half months too early? Logan had no idea, but he'd been careful only to find out he never needed to the whole relationship, it was time to take a risk. And when Patton was petting his tummy like it was the most beautiful thing in the world, it was hard not to speak up.

"Patton." Logan said biting his lip.

"Yeah?" 

"I love you." He held his breath on accident.

"I love you too." Patton tightened his grip around his waist and kissed the back on his neck. Logan smiled and let himself relax. Nothing was wrong. Logan had told himself that for years, but now he didn't have to lie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Patton's shirt](https://www.redbubble.com/people/peixell/works/24292341-pan?p=mens-graphic-t-shirt&style=mens-graphic-t-shirt&body_color=black)   
>  [Patton's bracelet](https://www.etsy.com/listing/203906427/pansexual-pride-bracelet-pansexual?ref=market)


	17. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Paternal gaming day

Virgil was feeling rejected. He felt like his dad wasn't paying attention to him anymore. He was always at his stupid boyfriend's house, who Virgil still had yet to meet even though they've been dating for months now. He knew that it was silly to get jealous, especially when his dad was always so much happier, if even possible. And even his mental health was getting better. irgil noticed him quietly muttering to himself what he needed to get done, or what he needed to remember at that moment. When he got distracted by something, he would tell himself to stay on track and focus. Virgil knew his ADD was bad, but he was improving so much and Virgil should be happy for him. But he wasn't, he was upset, this man was taking his father away from him.

His solution was one he used frequently and had become very good at. He shoved it all down and pretended to not feel anything at all. It was super effective until it became too much and he broke down. This time it happened in front of his dad and he was forced to explain everything to him. His dad just hugged him and stroked his hair and said he was sorry.

"This Saturday, let's just stay in, just us two. We can play video games and eat junk food and watch movies and you can tell me about whatever you keep humming around the house. Anything you want." He promised. Virgil just nodded, tears streaming down his face. Saturday morning came and Virgil found his dad talking on the phone, he just heard the tail end of the conversation.

"Really? They came? That was so fast. I'll pick them up next time I head over. Again, Virgil and I are hanging out with each other so I won't be able to talk. Oh perfect, tell Valerie I said hi. Okay, love you. Bye." He hung up. He said he loved him. Were they really that serious? And did he know a Valerie? Roman said Virgil already knew his dad's boyfriend, maybe if he figured out who Valerie was he could figure out who his boyfriend was. Patton turned around and smiled at him, "Hi. What should we do first?" 

"I don't know," Virgil shrugged, "I could show you Overwatch if you wanted."

"Okay. Let's go." He grinned and followed Virgil to the TV. Virgil turned on the game and plopped down on the floor. Patton came and sat next to him, "Play a game and I'll watch. After that you can show me how to play."

Virgil started a game and selected a character. Usually he played with Reaper, but he was playing defense today and there were a lot of fantastic sniper opportunities on this map, so he picked Widowmaker. 

"She's pretty, and she also looks like she wants to kill me." He said. Virgil laughed and began to position himself. He had good aim, and along with winning the game, he also managed to get an end card with 5 votes for his critical hit count. His dad clapped for him and Virgil handed him the remote, letting him into the training room so he could play with the characters. He fell in love with Mercy almost immediately. He flew from robot to robot, healing them up and keeping them safe. Once he figured out how to control the game, Virgil put him in an AI game on the easiest level. He managed to win, and actually did better than Virgil thought he would. They played back and forth for a while before Patton asked what he kept singing under his breath. 

"Oh, it's from a thing called Dear Evan Hansen. Roman loves it and after he told me about it I sort of fell in love too. It's a Broadway musical." Virgil shrugged. He didn't think it was that important. It was just a thing.

"What's it about?" Patton asked, turning to face the boy.

"Uhm, there's a boy named Evan Hansen with really bad social anxiety. His therapist told him to write letters to himself about why today will be a good day and he writes one while he's at school. Another kid that he doesn't really know finds the letter and takes it from Evan because it talks about Evan having a crush on this kid's sister. His name is Connor Murphy. He ends up committing suicide with the letter in his pocket. His parents think it's a suicide note addressed to Evan and are convinced they were best friends. Evan tries to tell them that they weren't, but they don't listen, so he kinda just has to go with it. The play is just him faking that friendship and it goes way too far and he gets in way too deep." Virgil said with a shrug. He felt a little awkward telling this too his dad, like he was sharing something way too personal. This was special to him, and it was scary to show someone new.

"That sounds like a very emotional play. Can I hear some of the songs?" He asked. Virgil nodded and worked on getting some of the songs up.

"This one is my favorite, it's called Words Fail. This is when he confesses to Connor's parents." He let the room fill with the sound of Ben Platt's voice. He watched his dad start to tear up while he listened. Virgil blushed and tried to hide away, but he stayed to watch his reaction to something he loved so much. He just smiled and tensed a bit at each word that overflowed with emotion. When the song finished Patton smiled.

"I like it. Can I hear another?" He asked. Virgil nodded and turned on one he thought his dad would like.

"This one is So Big/So Small. It's Evan's mom singing to him." He said and played the song. He saw Patton relax at the peaceful chords, at least until Heidi began to sing. He chuckled sadly at the description of the little boy in the truck. He only managed to get halfway through the first chorus before he was crying. Once the line "Is there another truck coming to our driveway/A truck that will take Mommy away" was sung, Patton's let out a sob. He pulled Virgil into a hug as he began to openly sob. They sat there in each other's arms until the song quieted to a close. 

"Dad? Are you okay?" Virgil asked.

"I'll be okay. Just remembering things." He said, letting go of his son and wiping his eyes, "Do you want some ice cream?"

Virgil nodded. Mostly because he knew sweets was a way of coping for his father and he was upset right now. Patton stood up and walked to the kitchen where he dished two bowls of ice cream. He sat back down on the floor and gave Virgil his bowl. They sat together and ate ice cream and talked about stupid things to help him calm down.

"I don't think I ever found out how long you and Roman have been together for." He said.

"It's December, right?" Virgil asked, making sure he knew what time of year it was.

"First week of December." Patton said.

"It'll be two years in March." Virgil said. He could talk about Roman, that was easy, "You didn't tell me you liked guys."

"True, but I also didn't really notice until I met this one guy in particular." Patton shrugged.

"You didn't notice?"

"I never payed attention. I always thought they were attractive, but I always kind of figured it was because I was young and wanting to experiment, so I ignored it. Eventually you get old enough that you can't blame things like that on just being young. This guy helped me figure out that I'm something that's called pansexual. I just learned that word." He said with a smile.

"You're pan? Now that I know that it seems impossible to miss. I remember when I was really little and you took me to the movies and we went out for ice cream after. There was a guy at the ice cream store that you were talking with that made you unbelievably flustered. I don't remember what he looked like or anything, but after he left I asked why you were acting so funny around him. You just said you thought he was pretty." Virgil said with a smile. Patton laughed.

"I don't remember that. But I do remember you coming home from your first day at kindergarten and sitting down and talking for almost 20 minutes about this boy that you met and how much you liked playing with him and how nice his eyes were. I asked if you had a crush on him and, like a typical 5 year old, you shouted at me 'ew, no, that's gross' and then pouted for a while after. You drew hearts around him in your yearbook that year." Patton said. Virgil blushed.

"I actually think I remember that. His name was Cody." Virgil laughed, "Hey, remember that Barbie you got me when I was 7?" He asked, Patton nodded, "Why'd you decide to do that?"

"I don't know," He shrugged, "I didn't really think about it being a Barbie. You just kept looking at it like you wanted it, so I figured you must've been worried about asking for it. I thought it would make you happy if you had it, and it was close to your birthday, so I bought it for you. And it did make you happy. You made me bring her everywhere with us and you would always brush her hair and make her little doll furniture with things around the house. It was adorable."

"Can I tell you something that's a little weird?" Virgil asked.

"I'm your father. Tell me anything you want." Patton shrugged and finished off his ice cream.

"That Barbie was my favorite present that you gave me for years. And I always kinda hoped you would get me more of them, or a princess dress, or a crown or something. I thought it would be so fun to be a princess, but princess were girls, and I wasn't a girl. And I still sorta want to wear princess dresses, but I thought that would be too weird." He confessed.

"Do you want to go get a princess dress?" Patton asked.

"Roman will have to come for that." Virgil said.

"Why?"

"Because I told him and now he's excited to take me shopping. And he may have already bought me a choker." He explained. Patton grabbed Virgil's phone from the coffee table and handed it to him.

"Call him, go put on your choker, and let's go shopping for some princess clothes." Patton told him. Virgil didn't know how to respond. He just called Roman and told him that they were going shopping and he needed to come. When Roman agreed, he went upstairs and got dressed. He clipped the choker around his neck. He walked back down, buzzing with nervous excitement. Patton grinned and they walked out the door.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you don't play Overwatch here's some links. I'm including voices because it's much easier to understand what the characters are beyond just a picture if you here what they talk about:  
> [Reaper](https://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&ved=0ahUKEwiH_-D79dDUAhUm9IMKHQ0aDgMQjBwIBA&url=https%3A%2F%2Fhydra-media.cursecdn.com%2Foverwatch.gamepedia.com%2Fthumb%2F7%2F74%2FReaper-portrait.png%2F272px-Reaper-portrait.png%3Fversion%3D648fc857cf4e2f7526833dfaead077ae&psig=AFQjCNEld1IW2UZOl1lLjK7wNKetkN2i3Q&ust=1498202622274979)  
> [Reaper voice](http://overwatch.gamepedia.com/Reaper/Quotes)  
> [Widowmaker](http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/overwatch/images/1/16/Widowmaker_portrait.png)  
> [Widowmaker voice](http://overwatch.gamepedia.com/Widowmaker/Quotes)  
> [Mercy](https://blzgdapipro-a.akamaihd.net/media/wallpaper/mercy-theatrical-wide.jpg)  
> [Mercy voice](http://overwatch.gamepedia.com/Mercy/Quotes)
> 
> Songs that Virgil shows Patton:  
> [Words Fail](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKP9UdIcXFk)  
> [So Big/So Small](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9vD2JBq0ns8)


	18. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Get in loser, we're going shopping.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Talking about scars, and how they can cover them up. No talk about self harm, just the scars.

Patton always knew his son was a little bit more feminine than most boys. However, he never thought he'd be taking him and his boyfriend skirt shopping. Whatever, it wasn't like he actually cared. If Virgil wanted to wear skirts, who was he to stop him? He was worried about everyone else. Virgil already had so much built up hatred towards himself, what would happen if people didn't like it? He decided to just put the thought out of his head and think about how adorable it was to see Roman pulling him around the store and grabbing things for him to try on. 

The store they went into had black and red walls and seemed split into two sections, a little more trendy and stylish, and a little more gothic. They weaved between both pretty regularly.

Patton followed behind, watching him pick things out for Virgil. Patton thought the pile in his arms was much too colorful for what Virgil usually wore. Deep reds, muted greens, dark purples, even white. When Roman thought his pile was large enough, he brought Virgil into the dressing room and handed him a pair of black shorts, a white top, and a black jacket that Patton couldn't tell if it was supposed to be a marching band uniform or a soldier's jacket. He hurried him in the little room telling him that this was something easy and Roman was doing his best to ease him into girl's clothes and he had to come out and show them. He was perfectly buzzing with excitement. Virgil came out in the outfit that Roman handed to him, his cheeks tinted pink. The top had a black skull with heart eyes. The shorts looked like they had already been through hell, studs decorated the sides. He had taken the choker off for this. Patton thought his son actually looked really cute.

"These shorts are tiny." Virgil was biting his lips, trying to pull his shirt farther down. Patton looked down and understood why he was concerned. You could see his scars a good half inch below the hem of the shorts. That and of course, they were very short shorts.

"Roman, is it still a thing to wear leggings under shorts and skirts and stuff?" Patton asked. Roman shook his head.

"Tights are cute under shorts though." He shrugged.

"Could he wear tights under those?" Patton asked. Maybe if they got some black tights it would keep his scars covered up and Virgil could still feel as cute as he wanted, "Would that work?" 

"I think so." He nodded. Roman handed him another outfit and left to go get tights. Virgil mouthed a thank you to his dad and walked back in the dressing room. Roman came back with a little pack of tights and sat with Patton while Virgil changed. He came back out wearing the same shorts, but instead of the skull shirt, he had on a black crop top. The collar of the shirt was wide enough to show his collarbone, but his arms were still covered by the long sleeves. The short were high-waisted enough to cover his belly button, so only a bit of his belly was showing. Across his chest _Normal people scare me._ was written in bold white letters. The font was something Patton recognized from a show that he knew Virgil watched but didn't know much about. The choker was back around his neck.

"What do you think?" Roman asked, obviously excited.

"I like it." Virgil couldn't stop the smile on his face. Roman cheered.

"Okay, make sure to split up what you like and what you don't. And don't feel bad about saying you don't like something." Roman assured, "Do you think you could try a skirt now?"

Virgil nodded. Roman picked out two skirts, one flared outwards, the other was leather and would be tight against his body, like what girls that worked in offices wore. Both would be short. He handed him a few more things and told him that he could make them up himself. Virgil nodded and took the clothes back with him.

"You picked out some really good stuff. I thought we'd be trying and failing to find stuff he liked, but he seems to like everything you picked." Patton said, he really was impressed.

"I just know what makes him feel comfortable. I want to push him out of his comfort zone, but that's hard to do if all you can think about is how everyone can see everything you hate looking at. I'm doing my best to keep his hips and arms covered, I should've paid more attention to his legs, but you helped with that. I'm keeping everything pretty dark and muted because of all the black he wears. He would feel uncomfortable if he suddenly was wearing neon pink or something like that." Roman explained. Patton was blown away by how observant he was, it was amazing. He was so happy to know Virgil had someone who loved him as much as Patton did, maybe even more.

Virgil came out of the dressing room to show off his new outfit. He had on the flowy skirt, this one covered the scars on his legs. His black shirt had a ribcage printed on it. He wore a red flannel shirt over the whole ensemble. 

"Try tucking the shirt it." Roman suggested. Virgil tucked his shirt into his skirt, "Much better. And I just got an idea. You look adorable, try on the next thing and show Patton. I'll go get some more stuff, I'll be back."

He stood up and kissed Virgil's cheek before walking away.

"What do you think of all this?" Patton asked, "Roman seems to be enjoying himself."

Virgil laughed, "He is. Thank you for doing this for me, Dad. It means a lot to me."

"I just want you to be happy. I don't care what it is that makes you happy, as long as it's safe. And I think those shorts looked super cute on you." Patton said. Virgil smiled.

"This makes me happy." He said.

"Then I'll buy anything you want. Also, I think it would be cute if we pierced your ears too, if you felt like doing that."

"Really." Virgil's face lit up.

"Yeah. I know where a body shop is that's not too far from here. You want to go pierce your ears when we're done?" Patton asked. He nodded frantically, "Then hurry up and go change. We only have so many hours in a day." 

Virgil laughed again and walked away. Roman came and sat back down next to Patton, a little stack of new clothes in his hands. When Virgil came out this time, he had on a different pair of black shorts and a lavender sweater. He looked so small and precious and Patton was reminded of when he was little and nothing fit him. The sleeves were always too big for him so his hands disappeared into them. Roman's breath caught in his throat. 

"You like it?" Virgil asked. The question was obviously directed at Roman.

"Princess, you look-you're gorgeous." Roman seemed absolutely taken away by it. Virgil blushed and hid his face with what could only be described as sweater paws. Roman held out the new clothes for him, never taking his eyes off him. When he walked away, Roman pulled his phone out of his pocket and began typing. Patton stopped paying attention to him. Instead, he focused on how long it was taking Virgil to change this time. 

"Any idea what's taking him so long?" Patton asked Roman.

"No clue." He shrugged with a too bright smile. Something was going on, but before he could even think about it anymore he was distracted by the prettiest dress he'd ever seen. It was a beautiful black sleeveless thing with velvet patterned after swirling flowers. A bow was centered at the top of the ruffled, sweetheart neckline. The skirt flowed out from the same ruffling that was used at the top. A most likely fake but nonetheless lovely black gem was placed in the middle of the bow and little strings of more tiny gems hung down from it. He decided that Virgil needed it. He stood up and picked out one in Virgil's size

A few more minutes went by until Virgil finally walked out. This time he was in a tartan skirt and a tight fitted, long sleeved, black crop top with a white collar and cuffs and two little white buttons in the center. The choker had come back off.

"You look like Wednesday Addams." Patton said. Because he did. Virgil kept fidgeting and shifting in place.

"I know, I saw the top and knew I had to do something with it, I just couldn't think of what. It would also be super cute with the pencil skirt." Roman said. Virgil looked like he was trying to telepathically communicate with Roman, but Patton was too excited about this dress to care.

"Okay, so it's okay if you don't like wearing it, and we don't have to get it if you don't want to. I just want you to try it on." He showed him the dress and Virgil blushed.

"Really? This seems a little extravagant. If we get it, I won't wear it anywhere." Virgil said.

"Why? Because you'll be overdressed for everything? Who cares, you'll look better than everyone. Please, just try it on." Patton begged. Virgil sighed and took the dress. He walked back into the dressing room. 

"That was a princess dress." Roman said.

"It was pretty."

"Do you think they have, like, death crowns or something? Because I think he needs one if he's wearing that dress." Roman got up and searched the store. While he was gone, Virgil stepped out. Patton gasped.

"It has a zipper in the back, so-" He turned around. Patton stood up and zipped up his dress. He stepped back and drank in the sight. 

"All they had were flower crowns and-oh my god." Roman said as he walked back over. Patton wasn't even sure if Roman blinked. Virgil blushed and covered his face, "No, no, no, no, don't do that." He walked over to him and pulled his hands away from his face. He brought him over to a mirror and turned him around so he could see his reflection, "Look how pretty you are. You're absolutely lovely. You look like a princess, like my princess."

That only made Virgil blush harder, "But everyone will be able to see my-"

"Your what? Your battle scars? That just shows everyone how brave and strong you are. Bet no one at the ball has been through as much as you have and come out the other side with a few scars." Roman kissed his cheek. His hands were on his hips. Patton's heart swelled at the sight. Roman was going to pump this boy so full of love that eventually, maybe he'll be okay with being himself. Roman whispered something that Patton couldn't hear into Virgil's ear that made him blush a brighter shade of red.

In the end, Virgil bought the dress, and everything that he showed the pair. There was a smaller pile of clothes he tried on and hated so he didn't bother showing anyone. Virgil seemed so much smaller and sadder in his usual clothes. Patton pretended not to notice Roman's hand slipping into Virgil's back pocket as they exited to store to get Virgil's ears pierced.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [The dress Patton sees](https://www.polyvore.com/cgi/img-thing?.out=jpg&size=l&tid=49770496)   
>  [Here's a higher quality picture, but with a less poofy skirt](https://vintagestyleclothinguk.files.wordpress.com/2013/07/hell-bunny-dresses-petal-dress-www-jackoflondon-co-uk.jpg)


	19. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Needy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: There is sexting in this chapter when it is probably not an appropriate time to be sexting.
> 
> _Roman_  
>  **Virgil**

Something about that sweater made Roman squirm. It wasn't even a sexy sweater, but seeing it on Virgil was nearly too much for him. It didn't help that the denim of the shorts had almost entirely disappeared under it, or that he was still wearing the "collar" that Roman had gotten him. The whole thing made Roman want to do things to the boy that he didn't know he was even slightly interested in until right now. The second Virgil was out of sight, Roman sent him a text. He would've been worried about Patton hearing a text tone, but Virgil always kept his phone on vibrate because the dinging made him mad. He was careful to not let Patton know what he was doing on his phone. He'd gotten good at that when he had to stay at his Grandmother's for a week. She still didn't know he was gay, so he had to constantly hide his conversations from her to keep from outing himself.

_You should buy that just so I can tear it off you._

**My dad is sitting right next to you. What if he sees your phone?**

Roman looked over. Patton was staring straight ahead.

_He won't notice kitten._

It took a while for him to get a response. 

**Tell me what you want to do to me**

_I want to stuff you full with toys so I can tie you up and leave you there until everything is sticky with your cum. I want to shove your face in the pillows and fuck you so hard you can barely move. I want you to cum on my face and lick it off me like a good little kitten. And I swear to god I'm finding your fucking stuffed animal just so I can watch you and cover you with bruises._

**If you're going to talk to me like that I'll just need to tell you where it is.**

_So you were tricking me?_

**I like you much better when you're talking about how desperate you are to fuck me**

_I bet you'd look cute in a pretty pair of panties under those shorts._

**Maybe I could where a pair under this skirt you picked out for me. It is pretty short after all. All I'd have to do is bend over in front of you and you'd get to see. Is that why you picked it? So you could see everything whenever I dropped something?**

_Careful kitten. You'll make me hard in front of your dad. My kitten is just too sexy._

As if on cue, Patton turned to look at him, "Any idea what's taking him so long?"

"No clue?" Roman smiled and shrugged. Patton looked suspicious for about half a second before finding something else to gawk at.

**You think I'm sexy?**

_I think you're so sexy. Especially in such pretty clothes and your collar._

**You like it when I wear it?**

_Fuck yes I do. Tells the whole world that you're mine and no one else can have you. Now hurry up so I can see your sexy belly again. Your dad knows something's up._

**I'm getting the purple sweater.**

_Good little kitten_

He turned his phone off and waited. Virgil came out, understandably flustered. But all the fidgeting he did happened behind his back. He was letting Roman stare at his pretty pale tummy, just like he said he wanted to. It was oddly satisfying to have him do whatever was asked of him. And he was right, the skirt was very short. Roman was torn between praying he didn't drop anything and asking him to grab something off that bottom shelf he was standing next to. He was just about to ask him to spin for him when Patton brought out the dress. Roman was a little surprised to see what he picked out. Sadly, they didn't sell crowns here. But when he came back from looking, Patton was stepping out from behind him and Roman may have said something, he wasn't sure. He was just happy to didn't take a sip of a drink, otherwise it would be spilling out of his mouth onto the floor right now. Virgil covered his face and Roman was having none of that shit right now. He was way too pretty to cover himself up like that.

He ran up and grabbed his hands to pull them away from his face. He brought him over to the mirror and told him how absolutely gorgeous he was. He shouldn't be ashamed of the scars covering his arms, it made him braver than anyone else. He didn't want Patton to hear what he was about to say next, so he bent over, close to his ear.

"You'd be especially pretty with your collar around your throat. No one else can have this sexy little kitten, because he's all mine." Roman told him. He felt Virgil shiver against him, he saw him blush in the mirror.

When they walked out of the store, Roman slipped his hand into Virgil's back pocket. Roman bent over to whisper to him again.

"Do you like being owned, kitten?" He asked. Virgil nodded, his cheeks still pink. 

He held his hand while they pierced his ears and some of the employees called them some of the cutest pair of friends that had come in. For once Virgil was the one to speak up.

"He's not my friend actually." He said, "He's my boyfriend."

Roman was so proud. And he always loved the looks on their faces when they found out the little emo punk was gay. It was one of his favorite things. Roman hadn't been confused for a straight person since he was 14, but Virgil got it all the time.

~*~

Roman couldn't help himself. He was at his house the next day. As soon as the door opened, Roman was on his mouth. He was pulling at his shirt, trying to get it off. Virgil pushed him back and giggled.

"Still haven't found my stuffed animal yet." He said. He bit his lip and wrapped his arms around Roman's neck. Roman whined and nuzzled against his neck. 

"You said you'd show me? Please, kitten. I love you so fucking much." He grabbed his hips and pulled him in. He nipped at his neck. Virgil pulled him upstairs and kissed him again.

"Second drawer in my dresser." Virgil said, "You still have to find it. I can't just get it for you."

Roman opened the drawer and was met with a fluffy Eeyore plush. He held up his trophy and grabbed onto Virgil again. It took all his self-control to not just push him onto the bed and tear everything off of him. Virgil pulled away again.

"Not today. Your parents are out of town this weekend, right?" Virgil asked. 

"Leaving on Wednesday." Roman said, kissing his collarbone. His dad had to leave for business or something. Roman didn't pay attention.

"Then you get a surprise this Friday." Virgil said.

"No, that's too far away, kitten." Roman whined. 

"You'll just have to wait." Virgil kissed him. Roman was way too impatient for this. A small part of his brain knew that it would be better if he waited. Maybe Virgil would wear the sweater. What if he ended up wearing a pair of panties? Or both? Roman would be doomed. 

"Don't know if I can, kitten." Roman said.

"If you do, then I'll make you go fucking crazy for me." Virgil told him.

"I like this new attitude." Roman said.

"What can I say. You make me feel sexy." Virgil said.

"Good." Roman smiled at him.

"Now, if you can keep it your pants long enough, can we go watch something?" Virgil asked.

"Depends on what." Roman said.

"Corpse Bride?" He asked.

"Fine. But we have to sing all of it." Roman told him.

"Good with me." Virgil said. 

When Roman made the deal, he didn't know that Virgil was a better singer than he was. He was the theater kid, the one in musicals, the one known as the singer. Virgil wasn't allowed to sing better than him. And he could dance. This was unfair. The only thing that Roman had going for him now was riffing. Virgil was way more talented than Roman was. Singing, dancing, drawing, makeup, and he had mentioned learning how to play ocarina because he played Legend of Zelda as a kid. If only he had the courage to do something with that talent. Roman was determined to do something about that. For now he simply watched as he danced around the living room to the Piano Duet. What did he do to deserve such a perfect person? Out of the corner of his eye he noticed an instrument he'd never seen in the house before. He stood up to go look at it. Virgil paused the movie and watched what he was doing.

"Oh yeah, that's my ukulele." Virgil shrugged, "I practicing when you came over."

"You play ukulele?" Roman asked.

"Yeah, you didn't know that? I've been playing for years. Although I can only play two songs by memory." Virgil said.

"What songs?" 

" I can play a Beatles song and something by Elvis that my dad likes. It was in a gum commercial at one point, and Tyler Joseph did a cover of it. It's really not that impressive." He explained. Roman handed it to him with pleading eyes. Virgil took it and sat down cross-legged on the couch. Roman sat across from him and listened to him strum. When he started to sing, Roman's heart swelled like a balloon pumped with helium. He sang about sunshine and happiness and how it would all be alright. It was peaceful and warm and Roman loved it. He felt like he could just curl up next to him and fall asleep. When it ended Roman applauded. His tiny emo bunny was singing about how lovely life was and how nice the sun felt.

"Next one." Roman loved to listen to him. Virgil blushed and started strumming, this one was much less complicated. It was slower, sweeter, like a lullabye. Roman relaxed into the song. It didn't take long for his emotions to get the best of him. It seemed that every other line said that he couldn't help falling in love, and Virgil almost constantly making eye contact with him. At the end, Roman skipped the applause and went straight for kisses. 

"I love you so much." Roman told him between kisses.

"And I can't help falling in love with you." Virgil sang quietly to him.

"Stop being so fucking adorable, you'll make me cry." Roman said. Virgil laughed and kissed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Songs that Virgil plays:  
> [Here Comes The Sun](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWBXtUX374M)  
> [Can't Help Falling in Love](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ThQkrXHdh4)


	20. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hickeys and penguins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some sexting in the second half. This time it's a relatively appropriate time and place for it.
> 
> Kinks:  
> Sexting  
> Masturbation  
> Ageplay  
> Daddy Kink  
> Oral Fixation

Logan didn't know what to do. Patton came over last night and it would be an understatement to say that it was noticeable. He bit his lip and stared at his reflection, debating what to do to cover up the big bruises covering his neck. Luckily it was cold enough he could wear a scarf without raising suspicion, but it would be weird to wear it inside all day. It wasn't like he hadn't ever gone to school with hickeys before, but before he could always wear a collared shirt and be fine. These trailed up to reach his jawbone. That wouldn't be covered by anything but a balaclava. He heard the door of the bathroom open and he jumped and covered his neck as best he could. He thought no one used this one. He saw one of his students standing there staring at him. Logan blushed and ran through his list of students. Ben. His name was Ben.

"Mr. Sanders? What are you doing?" Ben asked. Logan let go of his neck to shrug. He realized his mistake and put them back where they were. His face grew hotter, "Are those hickeys?"

"What? No! They're just-last night-that is very-yes. Yes they're hickeys." Logan let go of his neck and hung his head, "I was trying to figure out how to hide them. I didn't think anyone came in here."

"Why do you think I use this bathroom? The others are all filled with boys trying to get high and the girls' room is no better, believe me I know. I convinced them I was a girl." Ben said. He took off his backpack and started digging around.

"What are you looking for?" Logan asked.

"Concealer. I have a pallet that I think goes light enough for you. If not, I know Virgil has some." He said. 

"Don't you dare tell Virgil." Logan said, his heart pounding out of his chest.

"I'm not an asshole. I'll just tell him someone was having a makeup emergency and I was helping out." He handed Logan a thin, black container, a brush, and a little jar of powder. 

"Thank you. You certainly saved my ass." He said as Ben tried to color match him. 

"This will just barely work, tilt your head for me." Ben said. Logan did as he was told, "Am I allowed to ask why I can't tell Virgil in particular?"

"It's because of the person that put me in this situation." Logan answered. Ben used his fingers to brush on the lightest color.

"Can I ask who that is?"

"Patton." Logan said quietly.

"Virgil's dad?" Ben's jaw dropped. Logan nodded, "Virgil's dad was sucking on your neck like this? The most sexual thing I've ever heard him say is that a girl had pretty hair. Are you sure we're talking about the same Virgil's dad named Patton?"

"Yeah, I'm sure. I'd give you examples but I think I could be arrested for corruption of a minor." Logan said.

"Really? He's that kinky?" Ben asked.

"He will make you reevaluate what that word even means." Logan said.

"I never would have guessed. I take it he came over last night and things got a little heated." Ben said with a giggle.

"Maybe a little." Logan said.

"Okay, but was it just a white trash one night stand or are you guys actually together?"

"Almost three months now, and I'm not white trash." He pointed out. Ben laughed.

"So Virgil doesn't know yet. Have you told anyone?" 

"My cousin Valerie and Roman. That's it. I've told my mom I was seeing someone but I didn't go into much more detail." Logan explained. Ben nodded and asked Logan to pull his shirt down so he could reach more of the marks.

"You know you'll have to tell Virgil at some point." He asked.

"Yeah, I know. His play is next week, we were planning on telling him then." Logan said. He was terrified to tell him, but it was a necessary evil, so he would suck it up and do it. 

"He's sensitive. Be careful. I swear to god if you hurt my best friend's boyfriend, you'll never see the sun rise again." Ben stopped what he was doing to emphasize his point. Logan nodded in agreement, "Good. I just have to powder you and you're done."

"What does the powder do?" Logan asked.

"The concealer I put on you is a cream so it can move around and get everywhere. Adding powder on top of it makes it so it doesn't do that as much." Ben explained. Logan nodded. Ben took a few more moments and stepped back. Logan looked in the mirror to see every mark totally gone. 

"Thank you so much. I don't know what I would've done without your help." He said.

"Anytime." Ben smiled, "Feel free to meet up here if they aren't gone tomorrow." 

"Yeah. I hate to be that teacher, but you have that paper due today. If you didn't get it done, maybe work on it during lunch.Virgil is good at chemistry, so see if he'll help you if you need it." Logan said. He always tried to remind the kids about their homework if he saw them so they could finish it if they hadn't had the chance. A lot of kids didn't have the time or energy to do things at home.

"I actually forgot about that. Thanks for the reminder." Ben smiled. Logan nodded, "I'll head out. Wait a few minutes before you leave."

"Go to class, Ben." He said. 

~*~

Patton had showed him what snapchat was. He had it mostly to stay in contact with his sister who lived in South Dakota and to talk with Virgil when he was at work. Logan was convinced to get it. They had spent the past half an hour sending pictures of themselves as deer, and rabbits, and dogs. 

He was washing the makeup off his neck when his phone buzzed. He got a video of Virigl strumming on a ukulele. He was missing a few chords and had to go back a couple times, but he was actually pretty good. He was obviously just practicing. Logan smiled and took a selfie to send back to him.

_He's good. I didn't know he played._

A few minutes passed until he phone alerted him again. This time just a picture of whatever happened to be in front of Patton, which was his living room. The caption said _what's all over your neck?_

Logan stretched out his neck, pulling down his shirt to show off all of the bruises. He snapped a picture and added _What you did to me. It's a bitch to cover up. Ended up covering my whole neck in makeup._

A picture of Patton's countertop that said _Why is that the sexiest thing I've seen all day?_

Logan blushed. He was halfway tempted to end the conversation there. He instead decided to stick his fingers in his mouth and take a picture. No response. Against his better judgement, he decided to push his luck. He went to the freezer and pulled out a popsicle. He opened up the wrapper and, heart racing, put it between his lips. He dipped his head as far as he could and sent the photo he took of his face. His phone told him that Patton had screenshotted his last snap. Logan felt so proud of himself. His ego doubled along with his red face when Patton responded with a picture of his unbuttoned jeans and his hand disappearing into his underwear.

_Thank god Virgil just left._

Logan pushed it a bit farther. He went into his bathroom and took off his pants, leaving him in his t-shirt and underwear. He took the hem of his shirt and stuck it into his mouth, just like that first night. He snapped a picture so you could see everything. His face, his decorated throat, his belly, his back, and most importantly, his ass. He felt dirty and gross, but also excited and sexy. He'd never really done this before, but was enjoying it. 

_What do you want me to do, Daddy?_ He waited for a response. Another screenshot and this time a picture of the tip of Patton's cock peeking out from the elastic of his boxers. His hand was wrapped around it.

_Daddy wants to see his baby on his knees with his pacifier in his mouth._

Logan dug through his dresser drawers and pulled out the pacifier that Patton got him. He put it in his mouth and relaxed at the feeling of having his mouth full. He knelt on the ground, his knees spread apart and his hands resting on the ground between his thighs. He took the picture from high up so he looked smaller. A third screenshot. Logan grabbed the penguin off his bed and lowered himself onto it. He recorded himself slowly grinding against it. He was sure to make plenty of noises around the pacifier in his mouth. 

Minutes later he got a picture that made him shiver. Patton's stomach was streaked with cum. _Look what a mess Daddy made because of his baby._

He couldn't help but screenshot it. He took his picture, still sitting on the penguin. He was hard. _May I please play, Daddy?_

_Only if you can cum from rubbing against your penguin._

He sent a quick thank you and got to work.


	21. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obscene amounts of teasing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No smut quite yet. Couple more chapters guys ;)
> 
>  
> 
> [If you don't know what heeled converse look like.](http://www.adidasi.net/imagini/dama-tenisi-converse-chuck-taylor-all-star-lux-wedge_192_881x500.png)

Virgil's heart pounded. He'd gone and bought himself some extra supplies for the occasion. He wished he had the confidence he had when he was flirting so much, but it was easy to be sexy when someone was practically on his knees, begging to get into your pants. Now he felt small, and silly, and uncomfortable. He looked at himself in the mirror. His shorts were so short that his purple sweater nearly covered them. His thigh highs covered everything but his scarred legs, he tried to constantly remind himself of the words that Roman told him when he wore the black dress. He bought a pair of converse with the heels built into them because he remembered Roman saying that he like the way heels made people's legs look. His collar was around his throat, his headband in his hair. He had done his makeup today to look more natural, less like he hadn't slept in years. He'd even had his dad help him paint his nails last night. He didn't know that his dad knew how to paint nails, but not only did he know, but he was good. His nails were painted a shade of lavender that matched his sweater. His middle fingers were black and his ring fingers had a swirling black design on them that reminded Virgil of a volleyball. And then there was Roman's surprise, tucked away where only Virgil knew. He knocked on his dad's bedroom door and asked what he thought of the ensemble.

"You look cute." He answered.

"Are you saying that because you're my dad or because I really do look cute. I ask because I'm sorta trying to, uhm, impress Roman." He didn't know a better word to use in place of seduce. Patton seemed to get the message, because he nodded very slowly.

"I see. Just impress him?" Patton asked. Virgil shrugged and blushed, "Something tells me you have a different goal in mind. Come here."

Virgil walked over and Patton took off the headband. He messed with his hair for a few minutes, putting various kinds of goo in it. Once he was satisfied with it, he put the headband back on and gestured toward the mirror. Virgil looked good. Really good. Just that one adjustment made him look and feel way sexier.

"Make him beg for it." Patton told him. Virgil covered his face and hugged his dad as a thank you. He told Roman to pick him up for school today. He saw Roman's car pull up and he walked outside. He opened the car door and climbed in. The look on Roman's face was priceless. He was stunned. He hardly blinked as he drank in the sight. Virgil felt like he was being undressed by Roman's eyes alone.

"Hi." He said. His confidence flooded back into him. Roman just turned redder, "Are you just going to sit there, or will you actually drive?" 

Roman blinked and turned back to the wheel, "Yeah, sorry. You look really good today."

"You'll have plenty of time to stare all day today." Virgil reminded him. He thought he heard Roman whimper a little. 

At school he made a conscious effort to walk a little bit faster than Roman so he was always in front of him. At lunch, he sat on Roman's left side. That way he could eat with his left hand and rub up and down Roman's thigh with his right. He was making his boyfriend squirm underneath him and he had never felt more powerful. Roman was sending him texts the entire time. Really, it only encouraged Virigl.

_Way too fucking sexy_

_Please bend over for me so I can take a picture of your pretty ass_

_I can't wait to get home and tear that stupid outfit off you_

_I bet you'll feel so nice on my cock_

_My pretty little kitten moaning so loudly as I pound into him_

Virgil shifted when he saw that one. He pictured that exact scene and he couldn't stay still.

_You like being called my little kitten? You can wear your ears while we fuck tonight_

_You're wearing the collar. Not your decision_

Virgil moved again. Why did he like it when Roman took away his choices. It made him feel helpless and dependant. 

_I've just decided. Ears too_

_I'm going to bury your face so deep in the pillows you can barely breathe_

_Let me take care of you. I can make you feel so good_

Chemistry was an adventure. Virgil brought his paper up to the front of the class, purposely not writing his name. Mr. Sanders noticed, like he always did, and reminded Virgil to write it at the top of the page. Virgil took a pencil from the little container on his teacher's desk and bent over to write his name. He positioned himself so Roman got an eyeful of his barely covered ass. He handed the paper back and saw Roman's bright red face. He strolled back over and sat down next to him like nothing happened. 

In English, they were cutting out little squares for a project that had something to do with the book they were reading. Virgil didn't know and he didn't really care. All he heard was scissors. At first he mentally groaned at the struggle he knew would happen with his stupid left handedness. Then he recognized his opportunity. He struggled for a bit, mostly for show than anything, then he tugged on Roman's sleeve.

"Roman, I need help. Doesn't work." He begged, squirming and pouting in his chair, "Can you help me?"

He bat his eyelashes and gripped the front of his chair between his legs. Roman choked a little and took the paper and scissors from him. 

"You take such good care of me. I'm so happy to be your kitten." Virgil said quietly. Roman blushed bright red and began to cut the paper for him. 

A few minutes later he needed two different highlighters. The teacher kept a bucket of them at the front of the room for students to use. Now why would Virgil use his own when he could stage an accident that would make Roman squirm? He strolled up front and bent over just slightly, making it look like he was looking into the plastic tub. He picked one up and set it on the table. He was picking out the second color when he moved his hand and pushed the first off the table. He leaned over to pick it up. He kept his legs straight and bent at the waist. When he turned around, he saw Roman had his head on the table, his arms covering his face. His legs were pressed tightly together. Virgil held back his smirk. 

Needless to say, nothing got done that day. 

Roman drove them to his house and opened the doors for Virgil. They walked up the stairs and into Roman's room. The second the door closed behind them, Roman had Virgil pinned to the back of it. He was grabbing, and kissing, and biting and making Virgil feel so good. Roman's hands were around his legs, lifting him up. Virgil wrapped his legs around his waist and let Roman touch. His hands were rubbing his ass. His lips were biting his neck. His dick was grinding against Virgil. 

"You're such a fucking tease." He said between kisses, "All I could do was stare at you all day long. Stare at my pretty little kitten."

Virgil whined and wrapped his arms around his neck. The teasing was more than worth it. He just relaxed back against the door and let Roman have his way with him. 

Roman pulled him away from the door and carried him to the bed. He plopped him down and got on top of him. Virgil's head was on the soft pillow, hands by his face. Roman was kneeling over him, trapping Virgil's legs with his knees. He seemed to get gentler, slower, less rushed. He placed his hands on Virgil's chest and just felt. He ran his hands against him, up and down, feeling him. It felt nice, especially after the rush of heat and passion that had taken over him. Roman kissed him gently, like Virgil had become a breakable doll in the two steps they took. 

"Tell me what you want, kitten. I'll make sure you get everything you want." Roman whispered in his ear. Virgil knew what he was trying to do. They'd talked about safety and stuff before this, but never sat down and discussed how it would work. Roman was talking with him without destroying the mood they had worked so hard to make.

"I want you to fuck me so hard I'll feel you tomorrow. I want you to bite me, and mark me up, and pull my hair. I want you to use me for anything you want. I want you to own me. I want to be the good little kitten you always say I am." Virgil said. The only thing he really wanted was to feel him. Sore muscles, bruises, bite marks, welts, scratches, they lasted. Kisses and careful touches didn't. In response to his request, Roman pulled back his sweater and bit down on his collar bone. Virgil moaned at the feeling of teeth digging into his skin. Roman soon replaced his teeth with his lips, soothing the mark. He kissed his way back up to Virgil's lips, one of his hands came down to his thigh. He dug his nails into the flesh that was still exposed between the shorts and thigh highs. Virgil whined and squirmed. Roman sat up and trailed his fingers over Virgil's covered belly.

"We're going to play a little game, okay kitten?" Roman smirked. Virgil nodded, "It's called Red Light, Green Light. When you say green light, I can do whatever I want with you. And when you say red light, I stop. Does that sound like fun?"

"Yes, Sir. It sounds like a lot of fun." Virgil said. He didn't know where "Sir" came from, but Roman didn't seem to mind, "How do you win?"

"I win when I make you cum so many times you can't stand up. You win when you want me to stop and you say red light." Roman told him.

"Yes, Sir." He nodded.

"Good little kitten." Roman said with a smile. Virgil shivered, "Tell me you understand the rules."

"I understand the rules, Sir." Virgil repeated, already squirming for friction, "Green light."


	22. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rules

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Patton_   
>  **Logan**

Patton waited for school to get out before going over to Logan's house. Virgil would be at Roman's for a while, possibly even spending the night. Patton didn't mind, he was a teenage boy, he had needs. Logan was curled up against his side, head on Patton's shoulder. 

"I just remembered that we never figured out your rules. If you still want them, do you want to do that now when we have nothing else going on?" Patton asked. Logan looked up at him.

"Oh, yeah. We can do that now. Is it alright if I've never had rules before? I don't really know how it exactly works." Logan replied, blushing.

"That's okay. Rules are easy. Together we come up with a set of rules, rewards, and punishments. If you break a rule, you're punished. If you go above and beyond whatever we have set in place, you get rewarded." Patton explained, "Is that something you want?"

"Yeah, I do. I don't really know why, but I do. And we can change the rules whenever, right?" Logan asked.

"Of course. Do you have a paper that we could jot things down on? Later we can make you a real list." Patton asked. Logan stood up. He came back with two pens and a notepad, "So the only two that have to be on the list no matter what are these."

_No talking badly about yourself._

_If you feel bad or upset say something_

"Those are actually some pretty good rules to have. Could we add this one?" Logan hesitantly scribbled on the paper.

**No skipping meals**

"Do you regularly skip meals?" Patton asked, now concerned.

"Not regularly. But, on occasion. I'm not really comfortable with my weight, and sometimes the feelings part of my brain says that it would be a good idea. For some reason, I decide that's what I'll listen to for the day." Logan shrugged, he looked like he was folding into the couch.

"No skipping meals." Patton kissed him, "And I think you're beautiful."

Logan ducked his head and blushed.

"So, the last two times things have gotten a little sexual, you've asked for permission to do anything. Do you want to have that be a rule?"

Logan blushed redder, but nodded. Patton scribbled it down. Logan shifted his weight, "Could we have some little kid rules too? I kind of like it when you treat me like a little kid."

Patton smiled and wrote down some rules.

_Bedtime at 11_

_Share your things_

_Say please and thank you_

_Tell Daddy where you're going so he doesn't worry_

_Clean up after yourself_

_Gentle hands_

_No swearing_

_No lying_

_No tantrums_

Logan went in with his pen and crossed off the ones he didn't want, "Gentle hands isn't really an issue. Neither is tantrums. I swear way too much to cut it out completely, but I'm willing to not swear in headspace. Sharing implies I have to share you, which I don't want to do. How about this instead."

**I belong to only Daddy**

"I could handle that." Patton bit his lip to keep himself from smiling. Logan wanted to belong to him. He wasn't just okay with it, he was actively pursuing it. He wanted to push him into the couch, and kiss him, and curl up against his chest, and hold him. He was so in love with him, "What if we're going out? A really common rule that we could have if you wanted is approving outfits. We don't have to if you don't-"

"Yes. I want it." Logan looked at him. Patton wrote it down, this was more than he could have hoped for. He was expecting his weird kinks to be tolerated at best, but Logan was ready to immerse himself in all of it. Patton couldn't have been luckier if he tried. Then, the thought of Virgil hit him like a truck. Was he alright? Was it going well? Did Roman like his outfit? Did he like it the way Virgil was hoping? What if Virgil came home covered in bruises and welts? Could Patton handle that? What if it was a turn on for him? What if Patton got turned on by his own son? Oh God this was going to be a disaster. Apparently he voiced the last thought out loud, because Logan looked at him like he'd just gone insane.

"That's not what I meant. I just was thinking of things, and then the things lead to other things, and the last thing I thought was really bad, and I might be panicking a little. Well, not panicking, just feeling a lot of feelings and I got distracted. Just give me a minute, I'll be fine." He said, trying to calm himself down. Logan stood up and left. He sat back down with five little stuffed bears. One was yellow, another blue, a third red, the other two purple, and green. He handed them to Patton and curled up in front of him, "Inside Out?"

"You said you had a lot of feelings. This is the only way I know how to talk about it." Logan explained. He told Patton what the different colors meant, "I want to help."

"Well, Virgil is at Roman's house. He got all dressed up this morning to impress him."

"That's why he was acting weird." Logan said.

"I forget you're his teacher sometimes. Anyway, he was very obviously trying to get Roman to sleep with him. I think for the first time too, he seemed particularly nervous today. So that's my situation. Right now I feel happy," He picked up the yellow bear, "Because my little guy feels confident enough to do that. And he trusts his boyfriend enough, and he's in love. But I'm also sad," He took the blue bear, "He's growing up. I remember baking his first birthday cake and helping him blow out the candle on top and it feels like it was yesterday. And now he's an adult, making his own decisions. I'm scared," Purple bear, "What if he messes it up like I did and gets his heart broken? What if I mess up again? What if Roman pushes him too far and Virgil is too nervous to say anything?" Red bear, "I'm mad at myself because I could've helped him. I could've encouraged him and I didn't. I didn't do the one thing a dad is supposed to do for his kid."

He set the bears down. He felt all those feelings boil in his chest. What could he do? He felt helpless. He was an awful father. He felt Logan wrap his arms around him. Patton hugged his waist, he relaxed into the hug.

"I saw him today around Roman. He was the most confident I've ever seen him. And if it's okay for me to say, he looked cute as hell today. Kids grow up, you're going to be sad. That's okay, but you have to let them grow up. He'll be okay. He has endless amounts of love from both you and Roman. I don't know him outside of school, and I still helped him when he needed me to. It'll be alright. He knows what happened to you, he's careful. You shouldn't worry about that. You didn't mess up, you just thought something that didn't turn out to be true. At one point I thought clouds were the same thing as cotton candy, turns out that's not true. And the only time anything like that could happen to you right now, is if I did it to you. I can promise I'm planning on staying with you for a long time. Granted things might change, but I promise I won't leave you like she did. Roman's too nice to push him into anything he doesn't want. All he wants to do his protect him. Even if he did, trust me when I say he'll make sure Virgil tells him something. And something tells me that Virgil wasn't looking for much fatherly encouragement. You've been there for him whenever he needs it. He told you he likes wearing girls' clothes and you took him dress shopping. You've been nothing but kind, loving, and supportive of him. You've gone above and beyond your duties as a dad." Logan assured him. Patton felt like he could cry.

"Shut up and kiss me." He said. Logan did as he was told.

"Do you want to take a break from the rules and watch Parks and Rec with me?" Logan asked. Patton nodded, "Okay. I'll be right back, I just want to grab something."

He stood up one last time and walked down the hall. A few minutes passed and Logan settled back on Patton's lap, pacifier between his lips and a coloring book and a box of crayons in his hands.

"Color with me?" He asked around the rubber in his mouth. Patton smiled and stroked his hair.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'll color." He nodded. Logan climbed off his lap and set the book on the coffee table. He poured out his crayons in front of him and opened the pages to one that Patton on one side and one he like on the other. He turned on the TV so they could watch their show. Patton was in love with him. He slid off the couch and sat next to Logan, kissing his cheek. He watched as Donna and Tom tried to get Ben to treat himself. Logan picked up a green crayon and started coloring in the plants behind the dinosaur in the picture. He did feel better after Logan talked with him. He didn't know why Logan wanted to be little right now, maybe the talk overwhelmed him, maybe he thought it would help Patton feel like Daddy instead of like he was messing up, maybe he knew Patton liked when he used the pacifier, maybe he just wanted to suck on something and color. Whatever it was, Patton was happy with it. 

"Hey, Logan." Patton said. Logan turned his head to face him. Patton pulled the pacifier out of his mouth and kissed him. Logan's hands went to his hair, "I love you."

"I love you too. Now give that back." He smiled. Patton tapped his chin like he was thinking. He felt like teasing today.

"Don't feel like it." He shrugged and hid the pacifier behind his back.

"You have the mental age of seven." Logan told him.

"Seven years old is basically an adult." Patton insisted. Logan rolled his eyes and grabbed his face to kiss him again. He hands moved around his back and grabbed the pacifier. He pulled back, stuck his tongue out, and put the pacifier back in his mouth, "That's not fair."

"Don't care." Logan muttered around it. Patton just sighed and hugged him.


	23. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Good kitten.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kinks:  
> Scratching  
> Pet Play  
> Lingerie (ish)  
> Collar  
> Beginner Bondage  
> Gags  
> DIY BDSM  
> Feltching  
> Losing Virginity  
> Cumslut!Roman
> 
> This list makes it sound a lot linker than it actually is. It's pretty fucking vanilla (accidental pun).

Roman attacked his lips as soon as the words came out of Virgil's mouth. He was just crossing his fingers that he could actually do what Virgil had asked him. He'd asked to be hurt, all Roman wanted to do was keep him from getting hurt. But if Virgil wanted it, did that make it okay? Roman decided he would just get progressively more aggressive and keep an eye on him to see what made him uncomfortable. No time for talk with Virgil dressed like he was. He moved down to his collarbone again as he debated on taking off his boyfriend's clothes or not. On one hand, this was their first time having sex and Roman wanted to absorb everything he was. On the other hand, he looked way too good to just take it off. Virgil was whining underneath him. Roman dug his nails into his belly and Virgil moaned quietly. Alright, Virgil like the scratching. Roman could scratch. 

Roman knew of one thing that he knew had to go. He reached down between Virgil's legs and gently rubbed. He squirmed a little, opening his legs a little bit farther. Roman kissed him as he worked on the button of his shorts. He pulled the zipper down and sat back up. Pretty little kitten. 

Virgil's hands went to his face. Hiding his blush. Did Roman accidentally talk out loud? He wasn't sure. But he knew he needed to see his face. He grabbed his wrists and pinned them to the bed. Virgil was fucking gorgeous laying there. The collar around his neck, his legs spread open wide for Roman, shorts hinting at something very exciting that Roman didn't want to get his hopes up for. He just looked, taking it all in. Virgil bucked his hips up, trying to get Roman's attention. Roman smirked and hooked his fingers in Virgil's tiny little pockets, pulling the shorts down. Over his pretty stockings and shoes. 

Roman's dick jumped when he saw what Virgil had been hiding. Pretty black lacy panties. Roman purred and moved down lower on the bed so he could get his face where he really wanted it to be. He bent over and kissed the soft, tender skin of his inner thigh. Virgil's body twitched and he let out the smallest little sound. Roman nipped lightly, knowing that this spot couldn't take much without serious injury. Virgil yelped and covered his mouth with embarrassment. Roman growled and crawled back over him. Virgil moved his hands back by his head.

"Hands stay here. If you can't remember that, then maybe I'll have to tie you down." Roman left a kiss on his cheek and snaked back down to continue teasing. He wanted to have Virgil leaking before he took these off. It was important for the next step in his mostly improvised plan. He sucked a bruise into his delicate skin. Virgil actually let out a moan at that. It was like music to Roman's ears. Something he'd never had the pleasure to hear before. If he died right now, he would be okay with that. He continued to suck and kiss and mark him up, Virgil continued letting out soft noises. Moaning when Roman did something exceptionally good.

Several hickeys later, Virgil moved his hand down to touch himself. Roman pinned his hands back down and growled at him. Virgil whimpered and squirmed beneath him, "Do you remember what I told you?"

"Hands stay here." Virgil answered, his voice squeaking.

"Do you remember what I said would happen if you didn't listen?"

"You'd tie me up." Virgil's cheeks were red.

"Good little kitten. Now sit up and stay." Roman commanded.

"Do we already have lube?" Virgil asked, "I brought some with me if I'm aloud to get it."

"Go get it. Hands and knees." Roman whispered to him. He sat up and watched his boyfriend crawl to his bag. Roman could see his ass moving under those panties. The little headband and collar helped sell the illusion of kitten. He dug around in his bag and found lube. He placed the tube between his teeth and crawled back over. Roman took it and pat the bed for Virgil to climb back up. Roman stood up and went to his closet to pull out a scarf. He threw the scarf on the bed and pulled his shirt off. 

Virgil held his hands out, wanting to touch. Roman knelt on the bed and let him explore. Virgil placed a hand on the center of his chest. Soon it was replaced with Virgil's face nuzzling against his skin. 

"Are you alright?" Roman asked. He didn't quite know what was happening, or if it meant that Virgil wanted to stop. 

"Just reminding myself that this is real." Virgil explained. He gently kissed Roman's chest. Roman sighed and kissed the top of Virgil's head. Virgil tilted his head upward and kissed Roman. It was a break from the heated passion. It felt nice to just be with him, without the tension of what was to come. But they needed to get back or the mood would be lost. Roman threaded his fingers through the short hair at the back of Virgil's head, lightly scratching and pulling. Virgil groaned and squirmed a little. 

"Turn around." Roman commanded. Virgil turned around. Roman pulled the kitten's hands behind his back and tied them together with his scarf. He turned Virgil's face around so he could kiss him before pushing his head into the pillows. This would hurt him less and also was pretty humiliating, win win for both of them. 

Roman was pretty sure this was the series thing he'd ever witnessed. Virgil tied up with Roman's scarf, something that was his. It was claiming him in a way. His ass was up in the air leaving his back arched towards his head. Bruises dotted around his legs. Roman grabbed handfuls of his ass, Virgil quietly gasped. He rubbed and massaged and even kissed in a few places. He had a feeling that Virgil had gotten his panties thoroughly soaked. He pulled them down and with a bit of help from Virgil wiggling around, pulled them off his legs. He continued his motions of rubbing and kissing, but now he bit instead. Virgil was whimpering, his legs shaking. Roman sat up, lacy panties in hand. 

"Open up, kitten." Roman told him. Virgil parted his lips. Roman shoved the fabric into his mouth, forcing him to be quiet. If Roman's plan had worked, Virgil was also being forced to taste himself. He dug his nails into Virgil's beautiful ass and scratched down. Virgil let out a muffled moan. Big red welts began to appear, five all grouped together on each side. Roman lubed up his fingers and slowly pressed one into Virgil. He whined, bucking his hips back when it wasn't enough. Within minutes he had worked up the three fingers. Roman was surprised, his mind raced with such lovely possibilities. Virgil fingering himself open for days trying to prepare, maybe Roman just worked him up so much that he just managed to relax, maybe both. Whatever the case, Roman felt a weird sense of pride for his kitten. Roman stood up and slipped off his jeans, underwear following quickly behind. He knelt back down behind Virgil and covered his cock in lube. Was this enough? Too much? Could there be too much? Roman really should've looked into this some more. He mentally shrugged and pressed in. 

Virgil moaned. It would've been loud enough for the neighbors to hear if not for the fabric in his mouth. Roman took his time, or tried at least. It was hot, and slick, and not enough, and too much all at once. Virgil whimpered underneath him, legs shaking. Roman was beginning to shake too. He carefully bucked forward. Both of them moaned together. He did his best to repeat the motion, this time he must've hit something good. Virgil's whole body tensed up, he gasped. Roman aimed for it again, Virgil moaned around his makeshift gag. It didn't take long before Virgil hit orgasm. He left ribbons of cum all down the sheets, some hitting his tummy. As everything tightened around Roman he followed close behind. The world went white, his hands tightened around whatever they were hanging onto. That thing being Virgil's waist. 

Once they both started to relax after their highs, Roman slowly pulled out. He reached for the scarf around Virgil's wrists and worked out the knot. Virgil seemed sleepy, eyes fluttering. Once his hands were free he took his panties out of his mouth and sat up onto his hands. Roman kissed him. Virgil mewled quietly. 

"Are you alright?" Roman asked. Did he do something wrong without knowing it? 

"I can feel your cum dripping down my legs." Virgil told him. Roman nearly whimpered. Suddenly he got an idea. Well, it was something he had wanted to try, was now a good time? Why not? He slipped back behind Virgil and just went for it. He placed his tongue at the bottom on one of the drips and trailed upwards. Virgil swore. He was exhausted, but after feeling cum on his tongue he couldn't help but continue to lap it up. It didn't even bother him that it was his own. It tasted bitter and salty and a bit gross. It was thick and slimy. But something about it was just so addicting. He loved it. It was incredible to feel running down his throat. Virgil was moaning and swearing, fuck you Roman you made me hard again, little things like that. All too soon, Virgil was dry again. He rolled over onto his back and sure enough, he was hard again. 

Roman couldn't help himself he positioned himself between his legs and put his mouth around Virgil.


	24. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Today's the day.

Logan paced around his kitchen. He was nervous. Why wouldn't he be nervous? Today was the day. He was introducing himself to Virgil as Patton’s boyfriend. It was a nerve-wracking day. His phone buzzed in his pocket. Snapchat alerted him of a new photo. Patton grinned at the camera, his arm flung around Virgil’s shoulders. They looked so similar it was almost weird. The only major difference was Virgil’s hair was a few shades darker and his face a few shades lighter. That and the obvious addition of makeup on Virgil. There was no caption. 

Patton looked crouched over in the picture. Logan suddenly remembered how little Virgil seemed in class. Was he actually little or just seemed like it? He knew he was thinner than average, but was he actually short? Logan couldn't remember, or if he did he didn't trust it to be correct information. He shook his head and forced himself to sit. Patton was picking him up soon. Logan had gotten ready over an hour ago because he was nervous and didn't want to sit still for too long. He took a deep breath and thought about why he was freaking out. 

He felt purple. Usually there was something else too, but right now just purple. Every shade of lavender and lilac and violet. His heart raced and he wanted to tear his hair out. How could he turn the purple into another color? He picked up his rubik's cube and hoped to eliminate the emotions altogether and replace them with focus and thought. This was much simpler, he could do this. He twisted the cube in his hands, relaxing into the feel of the plastic. He let his hands move in their own and his mind drift into nothing. 

He heard someone at the door. He looked down at his hands to see the cube solved. He hurried to answer the door and saw Patton standing with a smile. Logan stepped outside and took his hand. 

“How are you feeling?” Patton asked. 

“Anxious. Terrified. A little nauseated.” Logan answered. 

“It'll be alright. Everything will be fine. If not immediately then with time.” Patton kissed his cheek and walked over to the car. Logan remembered something he nearly forgot in his emotional state. He hated feeling things, it got in the way of more important things. He pulled out his phone to show Patton pictures. He handed him the phone and let him look. 

Logan had been in college at the time. His bangs were long and fell in his heavily lined eyes. His ears were exposed to the air, showing the metal piercing through his tender skin and stir cartilage. He was sitting on the couch, Doc Martin clad feet on the coffee table. He was sticking his tongue out, snarling at the photographer, who he remembered at Valerie, showing of the barbell in his tongue. His black jeans were ripped and held together with mostly safety pins. His hand was up, pointer finger and pinkie sticking up in the air. Around his wrist was a couple leather bracelets, one spiked. His Nine Inch Nails t-shirt fit him a little loosely due to how thin and lanky he was then. His bottom lip alone had four piercings. 

“I told you.” Logan chuckled at Patton’s expression. Wide eyed, jaw to the floor. 

“I should've believed you.” Patton shrugged and handed his phone back. 

“That was before I dyed my hair red too. I don't have any pictures of that sadly.” Logan smiled and cringed a little remembering college. He still had a box of old band shirts he never wore anymore. Maybe he should go through them sometime soon. Virgil might like some of them actually. Too soon for that. 

“You were one of the kids I was afraid to talk to.” Patton told him. 

“I didn't talk to anyone. I mostly sat and read and listen to music too loudly.” Logan said. 

“I had a kid to take of, keep that in mind.” Patton pointed out. 

“Fair point.” Logan said. Patton turned the car on. 

“So we're meeting Roman there. He’s promised to keep Virgil calm during the show. After the show I'll go in and see what Virgil wants to do then we'll go from there.” Patton explained. Logan nodded along.


	25. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Isn't it nice to know a lot, and a little bit not.

Virgil may have gotten a little bit crazy with Roman. Just a little. After being sucked dry, he suggested a shower, which ended in more sex. They were too tired to get dressed after that so they went downstairs and watched a movie naked. Halfway through Virgil was digging his nails into the coffee table and bouncing up and down on Roman's dick. After that they just gave up and had sex on every available surface. The counter, walls, the coffee table itself, the floor, the washing machine, and that was only the ones Virgil remembered. He also learned that Roman loved cum. Not Virgil's, not his own, but just cum in general. He was lapping it up every opportunity he could. Not that Virgil was complaining. He came home the next morning still shaking and exhausted.

But now he had to be serious. He pulled on his purple hoodie the one with stitches. Roman stole his other one. He had makeup at the theater so he didn't have to worry about that, but he brought some extra just in case he ran out. He then proceeded to check four times to see if he actually had it. He was panicking about getting all Roman's wolf makeup off and his prince makeup on in time for his song. He knew he'd practiced, he could do the whole thing in about six and a half minutes. He asked one of the assistants backstage to give him makeup wipes as soon as he came off stage so Virgil would have an easier time making it work. He opted out of using fake hair and prosthetics like he really wanted to in order to shave off a few extra minutes. He did it during dress rehearsal. He could do it again. Not only was he stressed about that, but he was stressing about meeting his dad's boyfriend. The man that could potentially be a second father to him. Roman told him he had nothing to worry about, but he still worried.

He walked into the theater and worked his way backstage. Roman was checking his phone every few minutes as he got into costume. Virgil shrugged it off as nerves. He had to wait for some more actors to get here before he could really do any makeup, so he sat on the makeup counter and talked with Roman.

"No skirt today?" Roman asked. Virgil shook his head.

"They're pretty but not exactly good to work in. We're having that community dinner thing in a few days. I'll wear my dress to that." He said.

"Looking forward to it." Roman snaked over and kissed Virgil.

"God, you guys are gross." Little Red declared. Virgil never learned their names, just their characters. Virgil blushed and covered his face with his hands. Roman laughed and kissed his cheek, "Roman, can we practice while I get ready?"

Roman began his slow soft song. Little Red stripped down to a little white slip and a pair of tights. There was another dressing room, but she never used it. She said she didn't care. Some sadistic fuck in costuming made this poor little girl wear a corset under her dress. Granted it wasn't very tight, more to give the illusion of stiffness that dresses have in fairytales, but it was still cruel in Virgil's eyes. As she sang her lines she handed the corset to Virgil with pleading eyes. He nodded and helped fit it around her torso. She buckled it up the front and turned around so Virgil could tighten the laces. He reminded her to tell her when it was too tight. Roman and Little Red recited their lines back and forth while Virgil pulled at the string running up her back. He tied the string at the top and pat her shoulder to let her know she was done. When they had finished practicing, Roman announced that he was going out to the lobby for a minute. Virgil was left alone with the little girl. He helped zip her dress up and before she put on her cape she sat at the counter and asked Virgil if he could do hair.

He was alright at it, he could certainly try. He did learn how to do all the character's hair, so it couldn't be that hard. Especially since all it was was braids. He brushed her hair out gently and had her lean forward. He combed all her hair over her face and split it into two halves. He pinned one half off and worked on braiding the second half from the nape of her neck to the crown of her head. He tied the braid off into a pigtail and moved on to the next one.

"Well isn't this domestic." Roman said. Virgil jumped a little, nearly messing up her braid.

"Oh my God, Roman. Don't do that." He scolded.

"Sorry. It was just cute to see you braiding her hair." He shrugged, "Can you help me practice for my prince charming, Virgil?"

"As long as you let me work too." He caved. Roman started singing again. Virgil knew the song, he knew who sang what, he knew when to jump in. Virgil finished the second braid and let Little Red sit back up. He teased her pigtails and twisted them into two little buns at the top of her head. He quickly did her makeup and let her go. He sat Roman down and worked on his makeup. He worked quickly since more actors were starting to come in. People were practicing, singing, getting dressed, a big chaotic blob of people. He and a couple girls worked on makeup. A woman walked up to Virgil when he had a break. He recognized her as the Baker's wife. She introduced herself with a smile.

"I understand you're Roman's boyfriend." She said.

"I am yeah. And I understand you're the one he's seducing on stage." Virgil took a sip from his water bottle.

"Yeah. I actually just wanted to introduce myself to hopefully make it less awkward for both of us during that scene." She explained.

"Oh don't worry. I know he's acting. He's the gayest person I've ever met so I'm not concerned. Do whatever you need to do out there, I don't care." Virgil explained. He looked over to see his boyfriend singing Lady Gaga to himself and fixing his hair, "Exactly my point. It was nice meeting you officially."

The show went smoothly. Everything worked out. He got Roman changed successfully. One problem out of the way. A few minutes after the show ended Patton walked in. He waved and hugged his son.

"You did so good and I'm so proud of you. Everyone looked so pretty and you're so talented and I love you so much." Patton hugged him tightly. Virgil saw Rose and Phil enter the room and pushed his dad away to point them out. The couple introduced themselves and talked with his dad for a while. They started talking with Roman so Patton turned back to Virgil, "We can do two things. We can go out into the lobby and you can meet him there right now, or I have cheesecake at home that the four of us can go eat and you can meet him there."

"Uhm. I don't know. What if you guys get ready and head out and we'll do the same. If we meet in the lobby then we'll go from there, if not we'll meet at the house." Virgil decided.

"Alright. I'll go let him know. If it makes you feel better, he's really nervous about meeting you too." Patton told him. Virgil smiled and nodded.

~*~

"What can I do to help you feel better?" Roman asked him on the car ride home. They hadn't run into his dad in the lobby.

"Tell me a story." Virgil told him, "Anything you want."

"Alright." Roman nodded, "I just read this and I love it so I'll tell you the story of the three luck brothers."

"What's it about?" He asked.

"You'll find out." Roman smiled, "So it starts with three brothers. Their father is very sick and he's dying. On his deathbed he calls his sons up to him and gives them each a gift. To the oldest a scythe, to the middle child a rooster, and to the youngest a cat. He says to his children that if they find a place where these things are not known then they will be showered with fantastic riches. So the oldest sets out and finds a village where they used a cannon to shoot down their fields of wheat. He showed them how to use the scythe and the people were so amazed that they offered anything he wanted. He requested as much gold as a horse could carry and off he went.

"The second brother finds a place where they had no clocks. They slept when it was dark and awoke when it was light. He introduced them to the rooster, a bird that crowed once in the morning, once at midday, and once at night. He requested as much gold as a donkey could carry and the village was so grateful that they sent him with a donkey full of gold.

"The third brother found a kingdom overrun by mice and rats. They gave him his money for the rat killer and he went on his merry way like the two before him. But when he left the cat became thirsty. He started meowing at the guards for some milk. But the guards didn't know what this strange creature was doing. They assumed they were being threatened and after politely asking the cat the leave they evacuated the castle and brought out their cannons. They shot the castle down to rubble and frightened the cat so badly it jumped through the window and escaped. With they stared at the pile of stone they created they people sighed with relief. They were free from the tyranny of the fearsome beat that cries mew mew."

Virgil giggled and let himself relax. He took Roman's hand and let his stress ooze into his soft skin. Roman drove them home.

"When we move in together we should get a pet." Roman said.

"Like a dog or like a fish?" Virgil asked.

"Maybe we could start with a fish and see how it goes." Roman shrugged. Virgil rolled his eyes, "I'm serious."

"Oh my God. You can't even take care of yourself, much less another living thing." Virgil laughed at him.

"Well that's what you'll be there for. Making sure I don't accidentally kill myself or something. I repay you by doing everything I can actually do." Roman insisted. 

They continued arguing until they pulled into the driveway. He squeezed Virgil's hand.

"Are you doing alright?" Roman asked. Virgil shrugged.

"Just nervous."

"I will make you a Prince's promise that everything will work itself out. I've been told he's just as panicked as you are, maybe even more so." Roman kissed him and they got out of the car. They walked in the door. Virgil heard a quiet clicking sound emmenating from the kitchen, but he couldn't figure out what it was.

Patton grinned at the pair and brought them inside, "I gave him a rubik's cube because he was stressed out. Come on."

He pulled Virgil gently into the kitchen and there was Mr. Sanders sitting at the kitchen table, twisting the puzzle cube up. He looked up and smiled awkwardly. He set the cube down and waved a little bit. Virgil just stood there.

"Dad why is my chemistry teacher here?" His brain wasn't connecting the dots like he knew they should.

"Because he's the guy I've been dating. I know it's probably super weird for you, but could you at least give it a chance?" Patton twisted up the hem of his shirt. Virgil closed his eyes and took a deep breath. This was a thinking thing and not a feeling thing. He needed to think objectively and figure it out that way. Patton had been the best father Virgil could've dreamed of. He'd done everything he'd ever wanted, let his boyfriend spend the night, bought him dresses, bought him makeup, cheered him on in everything he'd ever done and never asked for anything but a thank you in return. This was weird and scary and a little uncomfortable, but Virgil could do it if it made his dad happy.

"Does he make you happy?" Virgil asked. Patton nodded, "Then I'll get used to the weirdness. Just don't be gross with each other when I'm around."

"Really?" He grinned. Virgil nodded. Patton hugged him tightly, "I love my sweet and sour misunderstood shadowling."

"Should I call you Mr. Sanders still or your first name?" Virgil set when he finally managed to have his dad let go.

"Can you manage Logan outside school and Mr. Sanders in class?" He asked.

"I think so." Virgil nodded. Roman wrapped an arm around his shoulder.

"Time for cheesecake bonding?" Patton asked.

"Couldn't think of anything better." Virgil replied.


	26. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bonding.

Patton dished everyone cake as Virgil sat down at the kitchen table. Logan and Virgil both awkwardly sat. Roman plopped down in the chair next to him and started talking with Logan. What did he like doing outside of school? What was his favorite book? What was his favorite movie? Did he watch Game of Thrones? What kind of music did he listen to? Virgil shifted uncomfortably in his chair. Patton brought the cheesecake over and set a plate and fork down in front of everyone.

"So, your dad told me you play ukulele." Logan said. Virgil nodded, "Do you mind me asking what you play?"

"Oh, uh, there's two that I know. I'm learning more. Right now it's just a Beatles song and an Elvis song." He shrugged, "It's weird seeing you outside of school."

"Trust me, it's not any less weird for me. I hate seeing students outside school. For my cousin's birthday we went to a sort of restaurant that had a bar in it. We were ordering drinks and I saw Jax Evers, do you know him?" Logan asked. Virgil nodded. Patton did not know who Jax Evers was, "Anyway, I saw him walking around nearby and I hid in the bathroom for 30 minutes to avoid talking to him."

"I can respect that." Virgil nodded, "And Roman, please give me my sweatshirt back."

"Why? It's comfortable." Roman protested.

"I know, that's why I want it back. I won't wear that purple sweater until you give it back." Virgil threatened. Patton assumed he meant the cute little lavender thing Roman seemed to like so much.

"You wouldn't dare." Roman held his chest.

"Don't test me." Virgil responded.

"It'll be back in your possession tomorrow."

"Thank you."

"Logan, didn't you say you used to dye your hair?" Patton asked. Logan nodded.

"It's been red and blue. Why?"

"Virgil wants to dye his hair." Patton said.

"I could do it. It's not hard. I mean, I dyed my whole head of hair as a broke, 19 year old, punk, college student studying chemistry and quantum physics." He said with a shrug.

"You were a punk kid?" Virgil snorted.

"Yeah I was. Piercings and tattoos and all. The tattoos are well hidden and my piercings closed up." He explained, "I still have a box of old band shirts."

"Could I see them sometime?" Virgil asked.

"If you want I'll bring it over." Logan said. Virgil nodded and thanked him. This could work. It was working out. It was fine. They talked and ate cheesecake and laughed until finally Patton decided he wanted go play a board game. They set up Scattergories and started playing. Time was up and they read of their answers.

"First category is sex foods. I only kind if know what that means, Logan?" Patton looked over at him.

"Chili peppers and chia seeds." Logan answered. Patton and Logan couldn't think of anything.

"Mine's gross." Roman answered. Virgil looked over at his paper and groaned.

"We're playing this with my dad." Virgil held his face in his hands, "And the worst part is that you're not wrong."

"What did he put down." Patton asked. Before Virgil had the chance to stop him, he blurted out-

"Cum and creampie."

"One point, that's the same thing." Logan told him.

"It is not."

"Yes it it. It's the same thing, just in a different location." Logan told him. They argued back and forth for a few minutes before Patton's hand shot up.

"I don't know what a creampie is." He admitted. Logan's jaw dropped.

"Seriously? Of all the things you could've been clueless about? You just happen to be the-actually nevermind. I have your kid sitting right in front of me. I'm not going to do that to you." Logan shook his head. He pulled up Urban dictionary on his phone and showed Patton the definition. He nodded.

"I didn't know that had a name. But, yeah that's one point for Roman." Patton said. Roman pouted.

"No, hold on back up. What were you going to say about my dad? I didn't think he knew what sex was. The most sexually charged thing I've ever heard him say was that a girl had a pretty stomach and he hoped he wasn't overworking herself to keep it like that." Virgil was wide eyed and holding back laughter.

"I am not finishing that sentence. I would traumatized you." Logan insisted.

"Is dad secretly super kinky or something?"

"What?"

"I knew it! I gotta go look for our secret sex dungeon in the basement." Virgil was starting to stand when Patton pulled him back down.

"I do not have a secret sex dungeon. If you really need to know, he's talking about bondage." Patton said, "I'm into bondage."

"That's anticlimactic. I was hoping for something more exciting. Like humiliation, or a huge daddy kink or something." Virgil slumped in his seat. Loan's eats turned red. Patton had a thought for half a second, were kinks hereditary?

They finished the game, Logan winning by almost double the points. Virgil and Roman left to do whatever teenage boyfriends do.

"I have a request to make, rather am invitation to extend I think. Feel free to turn me down if you want to. So I told my mom that I was seeing someone, because she called me and asked, and she kind if really wants to meet you. Would you be willing to come over for Christmas dinner?" He asked. Patton sat to think, "I don't mean to take you away from Virgil on Christmas or anything. Only come if you feel like you can and you want to."

"I would love to come meet your family. Of course, Virgil is the priority. I'll have to talk to him about it before I can commit to anything." Patton replied. His baby came before everything else.

"Oh of course. I wasnt expecting an answer right away." Logan answered. He was still awkward around Patton most of the time. He took a step closer and reached for Logan's ear.

"Baby boy, you have pictures of my dick on your phone. You don't have to be so nervous around me." He kissed his cheek and stepped back away. Logan was red in the face, but he still nodded. Patton smiled.

~*~

Logan and Roman left a few minutes ago and Patton figured it was a good time to bring up Christmas.

"I have something to ask you." He said.

"Me too actually." Virgil responded, "You first."

"Logan invited me over for Christmas dinner. Now I haven't committed y-"

"Roman asked the same thing." Virgil blurted out.

"Oh, well that worked out. We'll still have Christmas morning together and I'll still make us cinnamon rolls for breakfast." Patton promised. Virgil hugged him. For once, there was nothing to worry about.


	27. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hair dye and Christmas presents.

He was spending Christmas with Virgil this year. Which meant he needed the perfect gift. What if he got him some more kitty things? No, not Christmas. That would be for a smaller holiday. Maybe a new dress? He didn't know his size. Item after item down the list until his wastebasket was full of papers like he was a cartoon character. He looked at his desk and saw a little black box that he'd forget was there. He smiled and opened it up. His Grandmother gave him this ring when he was nine. He twisted it between his fingers, feeling the cold metal.

_I'll love you forever. I'll like you for always._

A song from a book that she would always read to him. He tried fitting it onto his finger, it finally actually fit him. He loved her so much. He would go to her house and she would get out her fancy jewelry and china. They'd have teaparties together, she taught him the proper way to eat at meals, a lot of which he still always did. She said that she still hadn't gotten her money's worth out of her things, so why keep them dusty in a cabinet when she could spend time with her grandson. She taught him how to play piano, he was pretty good when he still played. She taught him how to sew, everything from attaching buttons to intricate embroidery. She showed him style and how to present one's self to an audience, whether it was performance or otherwise. She made Roman what and who he was. When she was in the hospital she handed him the box and pat his hand, she was too sick to say anything at that point, but she smiled at him. The next morning they got a call, she had died that night.

He silently asked her for advice. And then it hit him. He remember all of that just by looking at a ring. He knew what he was buying.

~*~

Roman sat on the couch at Virgil's house. Logan was in the kitchen, pouring things into plastic containers. Patton fawned over his little baby, sitting in a chair in front of Logan. The room smelled like chemicals. _The Neighborhood_ played quietly in the background. Virgil would very soon have purple hair.

"The bleach can hurt a little, keep that in mind." Logan told him. Virgil nodded. Logan covered the long parts of his hair in bleach, leaving the short sides brown.

"Logan." Patton poked his side, "What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer?"

"Oh dear god." Logan just sighed.

"We are both lawyers." Patton cackled loudly at his own joke. Virgil and Roman chuckled a little. Logan just bit his lip to keep from yelling and continued working, "Logan, why did the chicken cross the playground?"

"I don't know, Patton."

"To say hello from the other slide." Patton said. Roman actually legitimatly laughed. Logan had to actually take a break from bleaching his hair in order to relax after that one, "Logan, what's the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a tub of glue?"

"They're all different things. There's literally nothing those things have in common." Logan stated.

"You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna." Patton grinned at him.

"What about the glue?"

"I knew you'd get stuck on that." Patton said quietly. It there was a drum set, that would've earned a badum tiss.

"I want to slap you." Logan told him. Patton blew him a kiss.

"What's brown and sticky?" Patton asked.

"What?" Logan groaned.

"A stick." Patton giggled to himself.

"I feel like I have a legitimate reason to bring myself physical harm." Logan stated. Virgil snorted.

"Hey Logan." Patton said with a smile.

"I swear to god if you pull one more-"

"I think you're pretty and I love you." Patton grinned.

"Shut the fuck up you adorable little shit." Logan shook his head. Roman could tell he was giddy over the compliment though. Who knew the no nonsense, took everything too literally Mr. Sanders liked being called pretty. 

They rinsed the bleach out of Virgil's hair, now bright blond. They blow dried it and got to work on the purple.

"Is this your first time here?" Virgil asked Logan.

"No, I kidnapped you for the weekend and they hung out. Logan didn't know, but I guess he does now." Roman shrugged.

"Yeah. Patton told you without my permission. He sent me a picture of a dog to apologize." Logan said.

"The apology puppy? Already? Dad must really like you." Virgil seemed absolutely shocked. They talked for a while about the incredible thing that is the apology puppy. Roman had a thought. He should talk to Patton about his gift. He gestured to him as discretely as he could to come talk in private.

"This might be a weird thing to bring up, especially since I'm still only 17, but I kind sorta want to marry Virgil. Obviously not right now, we're still young and there's a lot going on in the next few years. I don't even know if Virgil wants to get married. But I do have a solution in mind."

~*~

He had Patton's support. He even offered to help pay. Virgil was in the shower, scrubbing the colorful goo out of his hair. He stepped out of the bathroom, florescent purple hair shining brightly for everyone to see. Virgil grinned and ran his fingers through it. Roman couldn't wait to dig his fingers in, and twist, and pull, and feel.

"It looks so good!" Roman exclaimed.

"I love it so much." Virgil said, his whole face bright, "Thank you so much, Logan."

"Wash your hair with cold water and use the special shampoo and stuff that we got." Logan reminded him. Virgil nodded just as Patton picked his boyfriend up and carried him away. He smiled at them and let them on their own. Roman stood up and wrapped an arm around Virgil's waist, he ran his fingers through the new purple hair.

"It's still soft. I was worried it'd feel gross because of the bleach, but it's still so nice. And it looks great." Roman told him. Virgil blushed, want to go watch something up in your room.

"Long as there's no sex. Dad's here and I'm sexed out for at least another week." Virgil told him.

"No sex." Roman kissed him. They went up to sit in his room. Virgil pulled out his ukulele.

"Can I show you what I've been practicing?" He asked. Roman nodded furiously. He loved watching him play and hearing him sing. Virgil settled in across from him on the bed and started strumming a quiet little melody, soft and gentle, a little sad maybe, but a happy sad. He opened his mouth and sang about stars and someone he loved. He lived to let them shine. They could leave him, fly to a far away galaxy, and he would be happy for them, as long as they left a piece for him to remember them by. It felt like a lullaby, like a dream, he loved it. It felt warm and safe, but with the knowledge that it wouldn't last forever. Virgil strummed the last chord and waited for a reaction. Roman clapped.

"You're doing such a good job, I'm really proud of you." He said.

"Can I ask you something?" Virgil put the instrument down. Roman nodded, "Why have you stayed so long? Why haven't you left yet?"

"Why? Do you want me to leave?" Roman anticipated the heartbreak he was about to feel.

"Oh god no. The only thing I love more than you is Dad, but I feel like that's justified." Virgil said, "I've just never found anyone who's stayed as long as you have, even as a friend. I don't feel like I deserve you."

The heartbreak was worse than the one he anticipated, "You deserve everything I am and more. You're beautiful, and smart, and quick witted, and aware of things, and you're oozing talent out of every orifice. I mean to the point where I'm almost jealous of you. You can draw, and play music, and sing, and do makeup and hair, and dance, it's not fair."

"But I'm so uncomfortable all the time, and I complain, and I point out everything that could go wrong, I'd rather sleep than do anything else." He said.

"That's why I'm here. To help you be more comfortable and to remind you of everything that could go right. I'll happily take naps with you as much as you want. And I complain just as much as you do." Roman countered. Virgil smiled. Roman kissed him, "I stay because I love you. I really do. And I'm not going to leave in the foreseeable future."

"I love you too." Virgil smiled. Roman hugged him, running fingers through his hair. He needed to refamiliarize with his boyfriend's hair.

"Come here and let's watch something." Roman pulled him against his chest so Virgil was between his legs with his back pressed up against him. He pulled out his phone and tried to pick something to watch.

"Can we watch more Addams Family?" He asked. Roman nodded and turned it on. He handed Virgil the phone so he could play with his hair some more. Virgil hummed and relaxed into him. Roman felt good, this was how it was supposed to be, just without the heavy thoughts that very obviously occupied his head. He said it often, and he meant it, he loved him so much. Virgil grabbed the Eeyore toy from his bed and brought it up to his chest. Roman would've commented but he was in no state of mind to hear it.He just sat and pet him softly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [Virgil's song](https://youtu.be/MiOR2wDcgG0) is called Boat's and Birds by Gregory and the Hawk. The ukulele cover doesn't have great audio, but it's a good cover


	28. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Vanilla is a wonderful ice cream flavor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for being absent for so long!
> 
> Kink List:  
> Monster dick  
> Praise  
> Dirty Talking

Logan had done some thinking. He needed to talk with Patton. And while a weight had been lifted off his shoulders when they told Virgil, there was a different kind of weight now. He sat Patton down on the couch and sat next to him.

"I think I've figured out why I've been so freaked out by having sex with you." Logan said. Patton nodded.

"Okay, what is it?" Patton asked with a smile. God, why was Patton always so happy and understanding?

"I think all the baby stuff is freaking me out a little. But if we were to have just normal sex, I think I could handle it." Logan admitted.

"Okay. Did it feel like I was pushing you? I really hope it didn't feel like that." He said, gently squeezing his hand.

"No, it's just new and a little weird still." Logan assured him, "And I was thinking maybe we could try it out, right now."

"You want to have sex, right now?" Patton raised an eyebrow.

"If that's okay." Logan bit his lip. Patton smiled and pulled him onto his lap. Logan wrapped his arms around his neck and waited for someone to make a move. Patton kissed him and ran his hands up and down Logan's thighs.

"You're legs are so pretty. I kind of want to cover them all in kisses. Well all of you but mostly here," He ghosted his hands down his legs, "Here," He gently grabbed Logan's ass, "Here," He slid his hands under his shirt and rubbed his tummy, "And right here." He kissed Logan again. He nuzzled his neck and left little kisses all across Logan's skin. Patton took his time, slowly massaging out Logan's tight muscles as he touched. Logan wiggled his way closer to Patton. He let his hands dig into his hair while he felt lips on his neck.

"Cover me in kisses." Logan told him. Patton smiled and pulled his hips up so Logan's crotch was almost exactly level with his face. Patton lifted Logan's shirt up just a little and pressed his lips to the soft skin of his belly. Logan jumped a little at the contact, his lips tickled. He gripped the back of the couch and let Patton bury his nose in his skin. Logan pulled his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor. Patton giggled and lightly nipped at his skin, making him whimper. Logan wasn't worried about his stomach anymore. The silvery stretch marks across his hips disappeared when Patton touched him. Patton hooked a finger in his pants and pulled down just enough to see the tattoo over his hipbone. The golden spiral inside the rectangle. Patton slowly traced the ink with the tip of his finger. Logan held back laughter.

"Are you ticklish?" Patton asked when he noticed. Logan shook his head. He was lying. Patton attacked and tickled his sides, flipping them over in the process. Logan cackled, completely at his mercy. When Patton let up, he was holding himself up over Logan, hands on either side of his head. Logan's legs were still wrapped around his waist, "I think you're a liar."

Logan pulled at Patton's shirt, he didn't want to be the only one topless. Patton pulled it over his head. Logan ran his hands over the scars dotting Patron's stomach. Right below his bellybutton, just above the hem of his pants, and a third between and off the the left of the other two. Appendix removal. Another ugly scar ran across his ribs. Logan traced it with his fingers. What could cause a scar like this one?

"Bear attack." Patton said.

"Really?"

"No. But it sounds cooler than saying I fainted while we were finishing a surgery and landed on the equipment table." Patton shrugged. Logan rolled his eyes, "I was in various surgeries for 18 hours that day and didn't drink enough water. I was already in a hospital so I got stitched up right then and there."

"I picked you. I could've picked anyone, and I picked you." Logan sighed.

"Yep, and I'm starting to notice an issue with this position." Patton said, "Can you flip over please?"

Logan rolled over to his stomach to let him do whatever he was going to do. Patton pulled his hips back until he was sitting back on his knees, face still nuzzled in the couch cushion. His let his hands slide from his hips to his ass. Logan purred and let his back arch down. He felt Patton's hands gently kneading his skin through the fabric of his pants. Patton kissed the small of his back and rubbed.

"Can't wait to take these off and bury my face in your gorgeous ass." Patton purred, pulling at his pants. Logan hadn't ever heard Patton swear before. He didn't quite know how to react. But he knew what to do about Patton's request.

"Hold on." He announced. Patton let go immediately, which helped calm Logan's nerves about the future. He stood up and held out his hand. Patton smiled and used it to help himself up. Logan brought them into the bedroom and took his pants off, leaving just his boxers. He pushed Patton down onto the bed and climbed on top of him. Patton tried to sit up and touch him, but Logan pinned him to the mattress. He could feel something stiff poking his thigh, very stiff, and very large for what is expected of it. Logan didn't have time to think about it much before Patton was kissing him again and digging his nails into his backside. Logan whined when Patton's hands slipped under the boxers and squeezed. Logan sat up and pulled off his boxers, he reached up and took off Patton's glasses, he didn't want to get them dirty. He slowly crawled up and lowered his ass down over Patton's face. Patton quickly wrapped his arms around his thick thighs and happily lapped at Logan.

Logan whined. The new muscle was wet with saliva and left everything it touched with a coating of moisture. Patton slowly worked his tongue around the perfect little circle that was Logan's asshole, he gently poked around inside too. Logan let out a very feminine yelp, which turned into a moan. He involuntary bucked his hips in search of more friction. Patton hit his thigh and he made a conscious effort to stay still. He could hear Patton working to get his pants off. He could feel heat building behind his bellybutton and he quickly climbed off. Patton whined and tried pulling him back up.

"I was gonna cum." He explained. Patton pouted and flipped them over again. Logan was on his back with Patton looming over him again. He dropped his pants on the ground along with his boxers. Logan glanced down and nearly choked just looking at Patton's dick. He turned red and tried to maintain eye contact with him. Patton smirked and kissed him.

"Something tells me I didn't disappoint you." He muttered against his lips.

"Shut up." Logan responded.

"Maybe you should get acquainted." Patton suggested. Logan held his hands over his face. But whatever it meant to get acquainted, Logan wanted in, so he nodded. Patton switched positions again, he pushed Logan to his knees on the floor between his legs. Logan bit his lip, trying to figure out the best angle to do this from. At last he decided to just open his mouth and see if it would even fit. He swallowed down just the head, and already filled up a good portion of his mouth. He worked his tongue along the underside and tried to relax his throat, knowing he'd need it of he wanted to get any reasonable fraction of the monster before him into his mouth.

He was already getting flashbacks to college when he sucked one guy off and let another cum on his face. He wondered if the pictures of him, mouth open and full of cum, nose and cheeks streaked with semen, were still around. If so, he needed to burn them. 

Logan tried to inch his way down. He barely got halfway before he hit the back if his throat. He recalled the days when he would deepthroat cucumbers to win bets and let that old skill come in handy. He took a deep breath through his nose, relaxed his throat and swallowed the rest of him down. Patton yelped and dug his shaking hands into his hair hard enough to hurt. Logan slowly bobbed his head, trying not to choke. Patton whimpered and moaned loudly. Logan felt oddly proud that he could undo him so quickly. Patton yanked him off by his hair, thighs shaking and breathing ragged.

"Sorry, I didn't want to cum." Patton explained, "Where in the world did you learn that?"

"I was a slut in college." Logan shrugged, he was. Patton laughed and pulled him back up off the floor and onto his lap. He moved around so he could lean back on the headboard and Logan could straddle him.

"Do you happen to have lube by chance?" Patton asked. Logan rummaged around in his bedside drawer and handed him the bottle. Patton slicked up his fingers, "Can I hear some stories about your adventures?"

Patton reached between them and gently pressed one finger into Logan, slowly pumping. Logan hummed quietly and rocked his hips, trying to ask for more without saying anything. Patton happily obliged and slipped in another finger.

"Once a guy let me blow him until he came and I made out with him and made him swallow his own cum." Patton added a third finger, making Logan squirm. He whimpered and his legs started to shake, "Another time, I had a guy's dick in my mouth and let another guy fuck me so hard I bounced back and forth and made them both cum." Patton sped up. Logan was out of breath, "I had sex with my Calculus professor." A forth finger now. Logan whined and clung to Patton. He was speaking through moans now, "I pretended to be a stripper and gave a bunch of guys lap dances for money. I made a few of them cum in their pants in front of everyone at the club."

Patton just nodded. It was like he was completely focused on the story, completely oblivious to the fact that he was four fingers deep in Logan's ass and scissoring him open. Logan hated him so much right now, but he also wanted to fuck him so bad.

"I can't even tell of these stories are fake or not." Patton admitted.

"No. They're-oh fuck-they're real. Rose-Rose is a college friend. Ask her if you-Jesus fucking Christ-ask her if you don't believe me." Logan was having a hard time keeping it together. 

Patton finally pushed him onto his stomach and slipped his fingers out. It was only a few moments until he pressed in. Logan moaned and bit his lip so hard it bled. Patton was gently running his hand through Logan's hair and down his back. It was soothing to feel him just gliding his fingers across his skin. Patton paused halfway in, Logan was already shaking. He'd taken a lot of dicks, but it had been a while and none of them had been this big. A little farther, Logan may have screamed, but only a little.

"You okay?" Patton asked. Logan nodded.

"Just-big." He explained, "Don't take it so slow."

"Sorry." Patton sped up, but not enough. It was still too slow. Logan was in agony just waiting to take him all in. He rocked his hips back until he hit Patton's hips. They both let out very loud noises of either pain or pleasure, Logan couldn't tell what he was feeling right now. He couldn't tell if he wanted more or to stop entirely. But if being a science teacher taught him anything, it was to expiriment. He wiggled just a little and Patton started moving. It was so slow, barely shaking the bed, but Logan screamed. As Patton picked up the pace, Logan only got louder, and he wasn't even very loud when he had sex usually.

"Fuck, I feel like a virgin all over again." Logan admitted. He felt like he was being pulled apart at the seams and voicing that opinion seemed to strike a cord. Patton moaned and halted his thrusts for a moment before continuing, a little harder than before. As soon as he hit his prostate, Logan didn't stand a chance, he came harder than he had in his life. Patton groaned and followed soon after. He pulled out and Logan could feel himself so full of cum it was spilling down his thighs.

Patton grabbed his shoulders and pulled him against his chest. They quietly laid down on the bed, Logan relaxing on top of him, head on his chest. Bother were tired, out of breath, and sticky with sex. Patton stroked his hair softly and kissed his forehead.

"Can I ask how big you actually are?" Logan asked.

"I'm 5'9." Patton answered. After a moment of confusion, Logan responded,

"I mean your dick."

"Oh. That makes sense. 10 inches." Patton said. Loan's jaw dropped and he propped himself up on his elbow so he could sit up.

"Are you serious?" Logan asked. Patton nodded, "I just-what?"

"Yeah. Did you actually have sex with your calculus professor?" Patton asked. Logan sighed.

"Yeah. His name was Mr. Montgomery." Logan said.

"How old was he?"

"I don't know, like 45 if I had to guess?" Logan said. He just remembered being a horny college student with a crush on the professor and wanting to push his luck.

"How old were you?" Patton asked.

"20 if I remember right." Logan answered.

"So you have a thing for older guys?"

"Well I wouldn't say-oh my god." Logan just came to a realization, "Oh my god. I have a thing for older guys."

"You just realized that?" Patton asked, "According to you, you apparently slept with half the guys in school. How could you not know you had a type?"

"Because I slept around so much that I had a reputation for being a gay, emo, slut, which sounds like an awful insult but it was all true. Everyone wanted to sleep with me so I just picked my favorites. I never thought about why they were my favorites." He felt like the missing piece of the puzzle had finally snapped into place.

"I was in third grade when you were born. I was learning how to write an essay when you were learning how to walk." Patton said with a similar expression of realization, "You are such a small baby and I need to protect you."

"Shut up."

"When you were graduating high school, I had an eight year old going through the Power Ranger phase." Patton said. Logan laughed and kissed him, "How'd I do by the way? Are you still okay with everything that happened?"

"More than okay." Logan rested his head back on his bare chest. It suddenly hit him just how tired he was.

"Prefect." Patton kissed his temple, "You know what still baffles me?"

"What?" Logan asked.

"How does your butt always look so perfect?" Patton grabbed his butt. Logan laughed.

"Shut up, it's not?" Logan insisted.

"Ding don't, you're wrong." Patton told him, "You have the best butt, and the best thighs, and the best tummy, and the best everything else, but mostly the three first things."

Logan smiled and nuzzle into his chest. This was good, this was right.


	29. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Round 1

Logan brought over a big cardboard box of band t-shirts for Virgil to look through. Some of them were from bands he'd never heard of. _Primus, Stone Temple Pilots, the Cranberries_. Others were bands he knew well. _Blink 182, Fall Out Boy, Sex Pistols, Nine Inch Nails, Evanescence._

"Is this from an actual My Chemical Romance concert?" Virgil asked, holding up the black t-shirt with the familiar skeletal figure. A list of locations was written down the back.

"Yeah, it was. I saw them before they disbanded." Logan said.

"Seriously?" Virgil beamed. Logan nodded. They sorted through the huge box, Virgil ending up keeping more than he wasn't. Patton walked over to the pair with a little white board and markers.

"Virgil, can Roman come over today? I have a game I want to play?" Patton said. Virgil nodded and within the hour Roman was sitting next to him on the couch holding a whiteboard. Before explaining what they were doing, Patton asked how the two had met.

"There was an LGBT night at the school. I told you I was going to study at a friend's house, and went there instead. I remember they had a whole bunch of stickers that had the colors of different flags on them and you would take whatever sticker you were and hat way you could sort of know who everyone was. Roman walked up to me and all I thought was that you were so fucking loud. And about halfway through our conversation you said you thought I was cute and we should go out sometime, and we did that." Virgil explained with a shrug. There wasn't a lot to their first meeting, just right place right time.

"Your first impression was just that I was loud?" Roman asked with a smile.

"Loud and full of yourself. The loudest person I'd met until that point was Dad. And he's only loud when he remembers that snakes don't have arms and he starts crying." Virgil said.

"That was one time." Patton defended.

"You actually started crying because snakes don't have arms?" Logan asked.

"I'm a sensitive soul." He said.

"Again, I must ask myself, why the hell did I pick you of all people?" Logan looked over at him.

"Because I won you over with my childish charm." Patton grinned, "Anyway, so the game works like this. We ask you two a question. For each question each of you has the opportunity to be 'it'. That person writes their answer down on the whiteboard and the other one tries to guess what they wrote. It you match you get a point. If you don't, you don't get the point. Whichever team gets the most points wins. We'll go through all the questions and then switch. Does that make sense?"

"I think so. If not it will once we play." Roman shrugged. Patton handed him the whiteboard and asked the first question.

"What's is your favorite movie?" Patton asked. Roman scribbled down on his board, hiding it from Virgil.

"Easy. The 2007 version of Hairspray." Virgil announced. Roman turned his sign around. _Zack Efron Hairspray_. Patton cheered and put down one point. 

"Celebrity crush." Patton made Logan read off his phone. Patton clapped and watch Roman write on his board.

"Depends. If we're talking women, it's Lady Gaga. If we're talking men it's Ryan Reynolds." Virgil said, his arms folded over his chest. Roman turned his board around. _Ryan Reynolds_ , "I'm a damn genius."

"Shut up." Roman playfully pushed him over. Patton smiled at the pair and put down another point.

"Remember to keep these next questions family friendly. I don't want to know what you guys are getting up to in your free time." Patton told them. The pair nodded, "Roman's favorite part of your body?"

"Oh no. I've never heard a bad word come out of Roman's mouth about me, so I'm going purely on praise." Virgil bit his lip. Roman scribbled down an answer and waited for him to reply. Virgil knew he liked his ass, but he didn't know if it was his favorite. He likes his tummy, his neck and chest, legs, hands, hair, eyes, lips, everything. Did Roman even have a favorite? Virgil just shrugged, "I honestly have no idea, but I'm going to say my hair?"

Roman turned his board around. Patton saw it before Virgil did and squealed as he covered his mouth. _Freckles_ in Roman's big, loopy handwriting. Virgil blushed and covered his face. He hated his freckles so much. He'd cover them up with as much makeup as he needed to keep them hidden away.

"No. You're not allowed to like my freckles. They're awful." Virgil told him.

"They're adorable." Roman said with a smile.

"I am not cute. I am shadow and darkness. I am the night." He pouted.

"I love my dark, strange son." Patton said quietly.

"I love you too, Dad." He responded. Logan smiled softly at the exchange.

"Anyway last question. Would Roman trust you to pick out all his clothes? Including all special events." Patton asked. Virgil shook his head.

"No. He's so obsessed with fashion and looking good that letting me pick between two shirts is a rare occasion." Virgil said. Roman's board agreed with him and they got a point. Roman handed his the whiteboard and it was Virgil's turn.

"Favorite movie?"

"I think the obvious answer is anything Tim Burton, but something tells me he's not that predictable. He likes darker movies, and psychological movies. He likes getting into people's heads." Roman sat and pondered. Virgil bit his lip and waited for Roman to answer whole he stared at the answer on the board, "Dark Knight?"

Virgil turned the board around. _Fight Club_ , "Right idea, wrong movie."

"Okay, but that's hard to answer. You don't really talk about your favorite stuff that often." Roman responded.

"I know, but I'm impressed that you got the right style of movie. And I do really like Dark Knight." Virgil said. Roman shrugged, "Celebrity crush next right?"

"You guessed it." Patton said, "Do you guys know how cute you are together? It's adorable."

Virgil blushed and scribbled down his answer on the whiteboard.

"It's Pete Wentz. You explained all of this to me with your favorite members of your bands. Pete Wentz is your trophy husband, Brendon Urie is your best friend that everyone thinks your dating but neither of you are into the other, and Gerard Way is your best friend who you sometimes make out and cuddle with." Roman said. Virgil told him that so long ago, how did he remember? Is that how Roman always knew what to play when Virgil was upset? By knowing what he was reminded of listening to each band?

Virgil turned his board around _Pete Wentz_. He saw Logan smirk at his answer as they moved on.

"Virgil's favorite part of your body?" Patton asked Roman. Virgil couldn't decide. His hair was so soft, and his smile made Virgil's insides warm up. His hands were always soft and warm, unlike Virgil's own clammy ones. He had soft pink lips and his arms were strong enough that Virgil felt safe in them. But he had to pick a favorite. What made him the happiest? When they were cuddling and he had his back pressed up against Roman. He kept him warm, and his arms would wrap around him, he could feel his heartbeat in his chest. When he was having a panic attack and Roman would sing to him, Virgil could hear his pulse gently lulling him back into relaxation. When he was convinced that everything around him was fake, he could bury his face in Roman's chest and focus on the steady drum telling him that this is real and this is happening right now. He wrote his answer down on his whiteboard.

"This is kind of weird so I'll explain myself if I have to." He announced, not caring that he gave a hint or not.

"I still don't have any fucking clue. You don't compliment people, even me really. You just sarcastically tease me. What the fuck is a weird body part? My fucking elbows? My ears? Is your favorite body part my ears? Fuck it, I'm guessing ears. I'm wrong but I can't think of anything." Roman said. Virgil didn't really say things about people, just let them think whatever they wanted to think.

Virgil turned his sign around. _Heartbeat_. He had drawn a little heart next to it.

"You're right, that's weird. Care to explain?" Roman asked.

"Well, because it means your real and I'm not making you up. And it's stead and soft so if I'm feeling anxious or I'm having a panic attack I can just kind of smoosh into your chest and I know there will always be that really gentle noise in the background that I can focus on and calm down. I don't know. It's weird, but it's prove that not just you're real, but so is everything else, and everything has a really steady background to it even when things feel like I can't control them." Virgil explained. Patton had his hands on his chest. Roman looked pleasantly shocked.

"That's actually really cute. I didn't think that would be that cute." He said, "I know you don't like showing affection in front of other people, but I can't help myself."

Roman grabbed his cheeks and kissed the tip of his nose. Virgil blushed and buried his face in his chest. Roman stroked his hair softly. There it was. The soft, steady beat that was always there in the background. When he finally sat back up, he saw his dad grinning at them.

"I love you, Virgil." Roman said.

"I love you too." Virgil stared down at his lap. Patton clapped.

"You're so cute. Both of you are. I hope you're happy and in love forever and ever." Patton said. Virgil held his face in his hands, "Last question. Would you trust Roman to pick out all your clothes?"

Virgil scribbled down his answer. Roman nodded.

"I already shop for him all the time anyway. I know how to dress." He said. Virgil turned around the board _Sí_.

"I don't know why I wrote it in Spanish." Virgil shrugged.

"Porque hablo Español." Roman said with a wink. Virgil still didn't understand Spanish, but Logan did. He responded quickly to him and they carried on a conversation in Spanish.

"I don't understand Spanish." Patton whispered to Virgil.

"Neither do I." Virgil whispered back. Once they stopped talking in a language no one else knew, Patton announced a snack break before they switched teams.

"Who's the other team?" Logan asked.

"Us, silly billy goat." Patton said. Logan sighed and followed him to the kitchen.


	30. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Round 2

They had taken a little snack break and now Patton was sitting next to Logan on the couch. Logan held the whiteboard on his lap and waited for a question. Patton had let them pick four from a list he made up.

"Who would play Logan in a movie of his life?" Virgil read off the paper. Logan wrote something down and waited for a response.

"Well, my little blueberry is very smart, and he has a really nice voice to listen to, and he can solve any problem just with his brain, and he's magical, and really good at science stuff. I'm gonna say Benadryl Cabbagepatch." Patton said with a big smile.

"What the fuck is a Benadryl Cabbagepatch?" Logan asked him. Virgil snorted.

"He means Benedict Cumberbatch. Dad can't say his name, so he just says two words that have the same number of syllables." Virgil explained.

"It's not a hard name to say." Logan told him.

"Yeah, but it is." Patton responded.

"Just repeat after me, okay? Ben." Logan told him.

"Ben."

"Addict."

"Addict."

"Cumber, like a cucumber."

"Cumber."

"Batch."

"Batch."

"Okay now say it all together." Logan told him.

"Bendadik Cambagehatch." Patton said with a smile. 

"What the fuck?" Logan just blinked at him.

"Just go with Benadryl Cabbagepatch." Virgil told him, "Logan, what was your answer?"

Logan turned the board around. _Benedict Cumberbatch_ was written in neat, organized handwriting. Patton clapped. Virgil put down a point and handed the paper to Roman. 

"Alright, next question," Roman skimmed over the lines, "What is Logan's pet name for you?"

Logan's ears turned pink. They both knew exactly what Patton's pet name was. Patton knew how to navigate this, "He doesn't have one."

Logan turned his board around. _None_. He shrugged, "I don't get pet names."

"Still get the point." Virgil shrugged, "What is Logan's favorite body part of your's? You made us answer, we're making you answer."

"I don't know." Patton shrugged, Logan wrote something down, "He doesn't give out very many compliments. He really likes holding hands and he likes when I pet him, so I'm going to say hands."

 _Hands_. Virgil marked down another point, "What is Logan's most annoying habit."

"Oh. He doesn't really have any traditionally annoying habits that I've noticed yet. But he does this thing where he tries to cover himself up with baggy clothes and tells me he doesn't feel pretty, because he's very pretty and I want him to know that and it doesn't ever really seem to stick in his head." Patton said. Logan blushed.

Logan's board just had a series of question marks, "The only habit I really have is biting the inside of my cheek, I can't really annoy people with that. Patton, you're one of the most precious human beings I've ever met and I feel like we need to keep you in a museum so we can protect you and show you off at the same time."

"Logan, that's so sweet!" Patton hugged him and squished their cheeks together. Logan pulled away and handed him the board.

"Again, who would play Dad in a movie of his life?" Virgil asked. Patton wrote down his answer and prayed at least Virgil could read it.

"Oh dear. I don't know many actors. Mark Hamill, but Mark Hamill from the 90s." Logan said.

"Who's Mark Hamill?" Patton raised his hand.

"Luke Skywalker." Virgil said. Patton nodded. He turned around his board _Jack McBrayer_.

"I don't know who that is." Logan said.

"He was the little ginger kid in Phineas and Ferb, and he was the carnival game guy in Despicable Me, and he was Fix it Felix, and he looks like this." Patton pulled out his phone and showed him a picture.

"Yep, you're right. That's you. I can't even argue." Logan shrugged. Virgil smiled and moved into the next question.

"What's Dad's pet name for you?" Virgil asked. Logan laughed.

"What isn't a pet name? Within the last hour he's called me blueberry, silly billy goat, and sugar cookie. He's called me gummy bear a few times before. The answer is all of them, every single one." Logan shrugged.

"Try to narrow it down to what I call you the most." Patton said.

"I guess it's just baby then." Logan looked down at his lap. Patton turned the sign around. _Baby_ was written in big letters with little hearts and stars drawn around it. Logan fought back a smile.

"What's Dad's most annoying habit?" Virgil asked. Roman was rubbing circles into his back while they sat together. Patton wrote down his answer.

"Oh, he smacks gum really loudly." Logan said without hesitation.

"You didn't even pause." Patton pointed out sadly.

"Because it's really annoying." Logan told him.

"Well, I'm agreeing with you but I'm not happy about it." He turned the board around in agreement. Another point down.

"Oh shit, I forgot about body parts. Do that one." Virgil gestured at them. Patton wrote down his answer.

"It's my stomach. He likes my stomach." Logan said.

_Tummy_

Virgil calculated the points and Patton and Logan won by one point. Their prize? They got to have some cake that Patton made, but Roman and Virgil both ate some, so it made winning a little less fun. Oh well, they still got cake and that's all that mattered.

"It's really weird still to hear you swear." Virgil told Logan, "You don't swear at all when you're at school."

"I try not to. I've already had kids drop my class because I'm gay, I don't need parents getting mad because I said fuck when I dropped a marker." Logan shrugged.

"Wait, really? Kids have dropped out of your class because you're gay?" Patton asked him. Logan nodded.

"Some parents are assholes. I've been yelled at because I gave a student a D on a test they finished halfway, I've been cussed out because I tease students a little bit, I've been told I'm useless, I've gotten used to it." Logan said. Patton gasped.

"No, that's awful." He insisted.

"Maybe, but it happens. Like you, parents can love their kids more than anything else, but unlike you they can be self absorbed and closed minded. My guess if one of their little boys came up to them and said he liked wearing dresses he'd be kicked out or sent to conversion therapy. He wouldn't be taken shopping." Logan said. Patton blushed, "I wish my dad was more like you are, if that's not strange to say."

Patton grinned and held his face in his hands. He was doing the best job he could. He always felt like he was missing so much and doing so much wrong. Whenever someone told him he was doing a good job, he felt so happy and giddy. He would've held Logan's hand under the table, but then he couldn't eat. His entire life had dropped down after Virgil was born. Not because of him, but because of her. But now, he felt like he was going up, and whenever he felt like he had reached his peak, he went up just a little bit more.

He had his boyfriend sitting next to him, and his son across the table with the love of his life. And they were eating cake. Nothing could knock him down.


	31. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Q&A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: They talk about intrusive thoughts for a hot minute, nothing more than talk though.

Roman ran his fingers through his boyfriend's hair. They sat in pleasant silence until Roman suddenly remembered something.

"Oh, I should probably tell Nana that I'm gay before I bring you over there." Roman said.

"You seem more like a coming out just by showing up kind of person." Virgil said.

"Yeah, but Nana's old fashioned and I'll need to sit and talk with her about it. And the small detail that she may think I'm dating a girl named Veronica." Roman explained.

"What? Why Veronica?" Virgil tilted his head to the side.

"Because when she asked my what my girlfriend's name was I got halfway through Virgil and had to improvise." Roman said. Virgil laughed.

"You're ridiculous. Please tell your Nana so I don't have to invest in a wig to crossdress as Veronica." Virgil kissed him. Roman smiled.

"I will do that." He said, "But I would love to see you go full crossdresser sometime. Wig, makeup, padding, pinched in waist, fake boobs, the whole thing. I think that would be very fun to see."

"Not my thing, but I could do you up." He shrugged.

"Another time, I want to just snuggle with you for a minute." Roman said, "Can I ask you something maybe a little bit touchy?"

"Ask and if I don't want to answer I'll tell you." He said. Roman nodded.

"What happened to your mom? Obviously she's not around, but why is that?" Roman asked.

"Oh, she left when I was two. Apparently she decided that she didn't want a kid anymore so she packed up and left." He said with a shrug, "Her note said that she found another guy and she was moving to California with him."

"Wait, she left a note?" Roman asked, "Not even a goodbye?"

"Nope. She literally packed everything up, and left in the middle of the night. According to Dad, I don't remember. I did read the note though. Dad let me when I was 12." He said. Roman didn't understand why he was so calm about this.

"You don't seem upset at all." Roman said.

"Because I don't care. If she left, she must not have been a great parent, so why be upset that I don't have to deal with her?" Virgil asked.

"I guess, but she's half of you. Doesn't that matter at all?" Roman asked.

"Not even a little bit. I have cousins that refuse to talk to us anymore because I was born before my parents got married. If you can pick who to cut out of the family tree, you should be able to pick you to put in too. You're my family, you're parents are my family, Auntie Em is my family. Just because there's no blood doesn't mean they aren't family." Virgil explained. Roman had to take a second to reconsider his values. 

Family didn't mean blood. Family meant that you stood by them and protected them. You loved them unconditionally. Roman thought about his aunt who glared at him the one time he showed up to her house wearing makeup. She didn't need to be his family, just his relative.

"What happened after you read her note?" Roman asked.

"I told my dad he'd been hanging onto it for 10 years and it was time to let the past go. We sat in the backyard and started a fire in that fire pit thing we have. Dad threw the note in, I hugged him, and we made smores." Virgil said. Roman nodded. He loved his boyfriend so much, "Now that I'm thinking of it, it would be nice to have someone in the house who isn't afraid of spiders. That way we could actually kill them and not just avoid the room for a few days."

"Well when we get a house together, I'll kill all the spiders for you." Roman promised and kissed his freckle-covered nose.

"You better, because I'm not doing it." He insisted, "I will sit and scream and hide like a housewife in a cartoon."

"I've got my samurai sword if we ever need it." Roman said.

"My knight in shining armor." Virgil snickered. Roman stuck his tongue out.

"One more question?" Roman asked.

"Yeah?"

"Why don't you like kisses with tongue? I don't really mind, I'm just curious." Roman stroked his hair.

"It's a trigger for intrusive thoughts. Normal kisses don't really do that, but once you had a tongue it's just a sown ward spiral. God, human mouths are so dirty. What if his mouth has bacteria that mine doesn't and my entire bacterial composition is altered? What if I get a disease? What if that disease is bad enough to hospitalize me? What if I die? What if I don't, but I have this disease in me that I don't know I have because there's no symptoms but it's still killing me slowly? What if I get an infection? Human bites always get infected. What happens if his tongue germs get into my blood? Will my whole body be an infection?" Virgil described his train of though. Roman hugged him a little closer.

"No tongue kisses then." He smiled and kissed his cheek. Virgil smiled at him.

"I know it's absolutely ridiculous. And I know that none of that will happen to me, and of it does my Dad is a doctor and I'll be fine. But it doesn't make me relax at all. Living in my own brain is hellish at best." Virgil admitted.

"That's what I'm here for, to hopefully make it just a little less hellish. And if I can't do that, maybe I can just make life a little easier so you can worry about yourself more and everything else less." Roman told him. Virgil smiled and nuzzled against his neck "Now I've asked two risky questions, got any for me?"

"Well, let's see. No tragic backstory, no mental health issues causing you to go into a state of panic by showing normal human affection, anything else I should ask about?" Virgil asked. Roman shrugged.

"Or any questions that you still have I guess."

"Do you have any mental health issues at all? As far as I can tell you're completely neurotypical." He said.

"No nothing mental that's an issue. But I do have this thing with a ridiculous name that causes another thing with an even worse name." Roman said.

"What is it?" Virgil asked.

"Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension which causes Amaurosis Fugax. They're both really awful names to remember. And you'd think you could just call it IIH, but that's actually less common than just calling it Idiopathic Intracranial Hypertension." Roman said. He really wished doctors didn't make him constantly say this horrible name all the time.

"I've never heard of that. What is it?" Virgil asked with a little head tilt.

"The first thing means that the pressure in my skull will randomly go up really drastically for no reason. It's a really rare disorder that usually only pops up in overweight or pregnant women, so I don't know how I got it. The second thing is just a fancy name for temporary blindness." Roman shrugged.

"So sometimes your skull has so much built up pressure that you go blind?" Virgil asked. Roman nodded.

"That's the long and the short of it." He'd gotten used to the random flashes of complete darkness every so often.

"How long does it last?" Virgil asked.

"The longest I couldn't see was half an hour, but normally it's about a minute or two. But with the other thing it feels like my head is exploding in slow motion for about 10 minutes before, after, and during the weird blindness episodes. But if my vision doesn't do anything it just hurts a lot for a few minutes then goes away." Roman explained.

"How often does it happen?" He asked.

"Headaches every other month or so, vision issues about every two headaches, but it varied." He shrugged. This was how he lived. If the world went dark during a test, he just put down his pencil and waited for it to come back. If he was driving and felt the pressure in his head, he pulled over just in case. Watching a movie? He knew what the pause button felt like. On stage? He would try to stay as still as he could and give the best performance until he could walk offstage or he could see again, whichever came first.

"What happens with driving?"

"It's advised I don't drive for a month after a blindness episode. But I don't need to report it or anything like that. I've gotten to know it pretty well that it's not an issue." Roman said.

"That's it?" He asked. Roman nodded. That was it, it didn't really affect his life in any big way. The worst thing that ever happened was needed to ask his mom to grab headphone for him. He got them plugged in and used Siri to turn music on so he could wait it out.

"Has it happened around me?"

"Yeah. I've gotten so used to it that I'll just continue doing whatever I was doing but with just a few tweaks here and there. If we were walking I'd hold your hand so I knew where you were. If we were just sitting and talking, I just kept talking." Roman said.

"You just go blind?"

"Pretty much."

"With no warning?"

"Not beyond a headache."

"And it doesn't bother you at all?"

"Not really."

"What?"

"I know. It's weird, but whatever. I'm gonna go get some food, you want to come?" He asked. Virgil shrugged and followed him to the kitchen.


	32. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> XOXO

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Talk about self-harm after the *  
> Once again no actual self-harm, just worried Papa  
> The ~*~ is just a time skip and its fine to read past that.  
> There's also a very brief mention of homophobia and worry about a very small sort of "violence" nothing serious, again just worried Papa, this time with no reason to worry. 
> 
> We're getting to a few sad chapters that need to be out of the way before a very special announcement coming up just for you guys December 1st. Keep an eye out for that ;)

Patton was scrolling through his messages on Facebook while Logan rested his head on his chest. As far as he could tell, most of the messages were thank you's for birthday wishes or gifts sent. Nothing particularly exciting, until he head Patton let out a little squeak.

"What?" Logan sat up. Patton's face was white, his eyes wide, "Are you alright?"

"No. Not even a little bit. Emily just-"

"She's trying to get back in touch?" Logan asked. Patton nodded. Logan could feel his pulse racing.

"Are you going to respond?" Logan asked. More out of curiosity than jealousy.

"I don't know. There's so much happening in my brain that I can't tell up from down right now." Patton explained.

"Do you need help talking through it?" Logan asked. He found he was good with words. Patton felt better after explaining his thoughts, and Logan could help better after hearing them. Patton nodded.

"She was the love of my life for such a long time and she broke my heart. I don't think I can forgive her for what happened, especially what she did to me long term. It really messed with my head for a really long time. I know she wouldn't be a fan of Virgil having a boyfriend, or me having a boyfriend, or me having a girlfriend for that matter. She was the reason I think it took so long for me to date a guy. But at the same time, we were gonna get married. She's the mother of my kid, you can't really ignore that." Patton said, he stood up and started pacing around, "But if I start talking to her than she'll want to see me. What if she asks me if I'm seeing someone and I have to tell her that I have a boyfriend? She might start yelling at me, or what if she slaps me or something? What if she finds out about Roman and she slaps Virgil? He's too fragile for that. He'd break. Or what if she tries to take him away from me? You know the mother usually gets custody. But I can't not talk to her, she's-"

"Patton," Logan stood up and grabbed his hands. Patton was starting to tear up, "Everything will be okay. Come sit back down with me, it'll be alright. Remember to breathe nice and slowly, we can figure it out. You're right here with me. What are five things you can see right now?" 

"I see you. I see the wall, and the pretty circle picture hanging up. And I see the coffee table and the couch." Patton held his hands, he was shaking. 

"Good job. Now what are four things that you can feel touching you?" Logan asked. Patton took a deep breath. 

"I can feel how warm your hands are, it's nice to hold them. I feel my glasses, and my shirt. I feel the air that's maybe a little bit cold, but not enough to bother me." Patton told him. Logan nodded. He seemed to be relaxing. 

"Great, you're doing so good. Three things you can hear." Logan brushed through his hair. 

"I can hear you talking, and me talking, and me breathing." He responded. 

"Two things you can smell." Logan kept going. Patton had stopped shaking. 

"Vanilla and oranges." He answered almost immediately, "Your house smells like vanilla and you always smell like either oranges or coffee."

Logan had never known that. It made his insides warm and fuzzy knowing that Patton thought enough about what he smelled like to know off the top of his head, "One thing you can taste."

Patton grabbed his cheeks and kissed him, "You."

Logan blushed. He brought Patton over to the couch and sat down with him. Patton kissed his cheek, making Logan smile. It had never been the sexual moments Patton had that made Logan flustered. It was the little kisses they shared, the compliments during snuggle sessions, the hand holding in public. Patton enveloped him in a hug and nuzzle against his neck.

"How do you feel?" Logan asked him.

"Like I can think." He nodded, "I think I'll talk to her and just take baby steps. She doesn't matter to me anymore, I can take whatever she tries to start."

"Be careful, alright?" Logan told him. Patton nodded.

"I will." Patton kissed him.

"Wanna go lay in bed and makeout?" Logan asked.

"You've never had a better idea." Patton told him. He picked him up and carried him to the bedroom.

"I always forget you can pick me up, and it scares me a little bit every time you do." Logan admitted.

"I know you think you're heavy, but you're really not." Patton answered. Logan blushed.

"Shut up and kiss me." He said. Patton happily obliged.

~*~

He was snuggled up in his bed with Patton.

"I just remembered you said once you pretended to be a stripper and I feel like I need more details on that." Patton said.

"Oh dear god. Like I said, I was a slut in college. I stole a pair of booty shorts from a friend of mine and a crop top and fishnet stocking from another. I didn't even have the decency to get tights, I had to get the thigh high stockings. And I think I just already had a pair of neon underwear, so I just left my shorts unzipped and went with some friends to a gay strip club. All the performers were massive twinks-"

"What's that?" Patton tilted his head.

"Young, effeminate, gay man." He answered. Patton nodded, "Anyway, I fit in pretty nicely and I got dared to ask someone for a lap dance. It worked, and I made 20 bucks. Being a broke college student, I was looking for any sort of money I could. So I just sort of, kept going. Spent the whole night giving out lap dances and I made a lot of money."

"And you had sex with your calculus professor who was 45? How exactly did you manage that?" He asked.

"I had a huge crush on him and he was in the middle of a divorce. I'd had sex with straight men before so I wasn't concerned about that. Mostly I just wanted to see if I could. And I did, right on his desk like a fucking porno." Logan explained. He wasn't proud of his accomplishments. Okay, maybe a little proud, but he wasn't bragging about it left and right, and he definitely didn't want people knowing that.

"You've had sex with straight men?" Patton asked. Logan shrugged.

"Yeah. I was pretty, I convinced them that they didn't need to be gay to fuck me, so they did." He left out little details like how most of those times he was in a skirt, and face down. He was convincing, but not that convincing.

"And you still hadn't tried out any weird domination stuff?" Patton asked. Logan shook his head.

"It was all one night stands, or I got really drunk with a friend and we had sex, or friends with benefits situations. No one wanted a long term romantic relationship with me. And what you're into, isn't really appropriate for a one or two time thing." Logan shrugged.

"No one wanted a relationship with you?" Patton looked sad. Logan shook his head.

"I've gotten a lot better at this lately, but I used to take things very literally. It was hard to really have a legitimate conversation with me because English is reliant on context, and figurative speech, and phrases that doesn't really make sense but we all know what they mean anyway. I started to learn other languages because none of them are as bad as English is. Their phrases make sense, there may be a couple words that rely on context but nothing compared to English." Logan said.

"Well, I really like talking to you if it's any solace." Patton kissed his forehead, "And it doesn't seem to be an issue for you anymore."

"No, it is. Earlier you said you couldn't tell up from down andy first instinct was to tell you that floor is down and floor in soft." Logan said.

"Then we can be clueless together." Patton smiled. Logan snuggled in closer to him, 

*

"Can I tell you something a little bit personal? I just need to talk about it and you're a good listener."

"Personal how?" Logan asked.

"Personal like I probably shouldn't talk but it without permission, but it's driving me insane." Patton said.

"I mean, if you really need to I guess you can. But I will say, if you think you shouldn't mention it I don't think it should be mentioned." Logan said. Patton nodded.

"I know, but it's bothering me a lot. I could probably tell Roman, but he's already doing more than I could ever ask and I can't put that on him." Patton said. Logan stayed quiet so he could talk, "So first of all, Virgil's mental health isn't in a really great place right now. He has a lot to deal with. And for a really long time, he was sort of taking out his mental frustration in really not good ways."

"Like drugs? Like alcohol? Like self-harm?" Logan wanted to guage what he'd be dealing with. This was icy territory right now, and he didn't want to slip.

"The last one." Patton told him. Logan nodded, "He's been fine for a few months now, and Roman knows about it so he's helping out. He came up with a system where Virgil draws on himself whenever he wants to-"

"Good idea. Gives him something to do instead. And drawing helps with anxiety, that could help a lot." He interrupted so Patton didn't need to give out details. He knew from experience how touchy this could be.

"And it is! It's helping him so much, and I'm so happy. But I'm seeing drawings pop up more and more often and I'm freaking out a little bit. What if he relapses? I know that can happen. What happens if it's really bad? We could need another hospital trip." Patton told him.

"Another?" Logan asked, "Did he get that bad?"

"The hospital trip was for something different that I won't mention because then I'd be really pushing my luck. But that's how I found out. They bandaged him all up and took me aside and told me what was going on. Then Roman told me it had kept on going without me noticing, and that hurt worse than getting my heart cut out with a spoon." Patton exhaled loudly. Logan sat up and slowly rubbed circles in his chest.

"Because Virgil knew how to avoid getting caught, not because you didn't do a good job paying attention. He probably just didn't know how to stop, so he kept going." Logan said. Patton bit his lip.

"Can you keep an eye on him for me? I just need help, and you see him almost every day. Can you do that, please?" Patton looked up at him with pleading eyes.

"Yeah, of course. I already keep a close eye on him since he told me he has panic attacks and sometimes has to leave to calm down." Logan promised.

"Thank you." Patton kissed him.


	33. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan has a talk and Roman gets frustrated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Self harm discussion, self harm scars, the term "cutting" (I hate that word but it fit with what I was doing), talk about weight gain. Self harm is before the ~*~ weight gain is before the *
> 
>  
> 
> Announcement: Because Christmas in the story and Christmas in real life happen to collide with each other, I decide to do a 12 Days of Christmas! Every day starting on the 14th and going to 24th I will be uploading a fluffy Christmas chapter. On the 25th itself I will upload 2 separate chapters as a Christmas present from me to you. I would've thrown in some Hanukkah stuff, but I know virtually nothing about the holiday and I don't want to mess it up.

Logan had dropped a note at his desk while they worked. Virgil read it under the table. 

_Come talk to me during lunch. Nothing bad, no need to be anxious._

Virgil was anxious. At least lunch was right after Chemistry, so he just told Roman to eat without him and he'd catch up. Roman responded with tremendous worry he wouldn't eat anything. Virgil promised he'd eat something and Roman walked away, still obviously worried. Kids started coming in for lunch work time. Logan wrote up on the board he'd be a minute and took Virgil to a more remote part of the hall.

"This isn't weird at all." Virgil pointed out.

"Well I needed somewhere quiet to talk with you. Taking you to the hallway won't get me arrested." He shrugged.

"Okay. What are we talking about?"

"I wanted to tell you that I found out about what's been going on, why you're drawing on yourself." He said. Virgil's stomach dropped to his feet, "I'd say your dad told me, but he didn't. I figured it out on my own more or less. You don't need to get mad at him, okay? He's worried."

"Another adult taking me away to talk about how I shouldn't cut myself because they love me." Virgil sighed.

"Sort of. It's true, you have a lot of people that love you and want you to be happy, but that's not really why I wanted to talk." Logan said, his arms were crossed across his chest.

"So what is this?" Virgil asked. He wanted to go sit with his boyfriend and put his head on his shoulder.

"This is me telling you I get it. And not in the way adults mean. Not the 'I was a teenager too once' kind of way. I'm telling you I understand." Logan held out his hand. The tender part of his hand where his thumb connected to the rest of his fingers and down onto his wrist, was covered in little tiny scars. If you didn't know to look they'd be invisible. But Virgil did knew to look, and he saw every one of them. His brain stopped working for a second. His looked up at Logan's face.

"You-" Virgil just blinked at him.

"I get it." Logan repeated himself, "So if you need to, come talk. Patton and Roman are both amazing people, and all they want to do is help. But they don't know what's going on inside your head, and I know at least somewhat. I'm not saying you shouldn't ask them for help, because you absolutely should. I'm saying that sometimes their help, isn't very helpful. Where you're at is a hellscape, and I know better than most what it's like."

"Those aren't fake?" Virgil's paranoia began to set in. The little voice in the back of him mind trying to convince him everyone around him was lying.

"Just as real as your's." Logan told him, "But that also means I know exactly what to look for. If I get even a little bit suspicious, I'm telling your dad. You understand?"

"Yeah. Can I give you a hug?" Virgil didn't know why he wanted to hug him, just that he did. Logan held his arms out. Virgil hugged him, he smelled like oranges.

"Your dad loves you a lot. You're all he talks about." Logan told him. Virgil nodded against his chest and pulled away. Logan pulled a marker out of his pocket and gently grabbed Virgil's arm. He pulled up his sleeve and wrote down a phone number, "Call me if you ever need me, okay?"

"Okay." Virgil actually felt hopeful for the first time in a long time.

"Good. Say hi to Roman for me." He said. Virgil nodded and head down to the lunch room. Roman grinned and kissed his cheek when he did.

"That was fast. What did he want to talk about?" Roman asked.

"Nothing important." He shrugged.

~*~

"I gained two pounds this week." Virgil told his dad. He smiled widely at him.

"Good job! At this rate you'll be at a healthy weight again by Christmas." Patton assured him. Virgil nodded, but in his mind he doubted that very much. Last week he lost four pounds. His ribs were still visible under his skin, his back still bumpy from his spine showing through. He'd always heard people complain about how quickly they gained weight, but he'd give anything to be in their shoes right now. How could Roman stand to snuggle with him as much as he did? It would be like hugging a skeleton. Whenever Virgil brought it up, he swore he didn't really mind.

He sat, discouraged, on the couch and played on his phone. He really tried to ignore the feeling of his rib cage stabbing him in the stomach.

*

"Hey, Virgil, can I tell you something?"

"Sure, I guess." He said with a shrug. Patton sat on the chair next to him.

"Your mom has been trying to get back in touch with me. She wants to see you again." Patton said.

"Why? I don't even remember what she looked like." Virgil pointed out.

"I don't know, but she's really pushing. I told her we were busy all Christmas break, but we could see again after school started again." He said.

"Okay. She's a shitty mom, but okay." Virgil shrugged.

"Don't say that." Patton said kindly.

"Why not? It's true." Virgil said.

"I'm sure she had a perfectly good reason to leave." He said.

"No, we know her reason. She met some Sugar Daddy and ran away to California. She had a kid and a fiancé that loved her to pieces, and she ran away." Virgil said. Patton nodded.

"I know." He looked down at his lap sadly. Virgil didn't remember his mom beyond what he'd heard from stories or the note she left. Dad didn't keep pictures of her around, they were all in a photo album stored in a box somewhere. They had a couple home videos tucked away too, but Virgil hadn't ever watched them. He had been told she had green eyes. She was a mystery to him. He had no idea what he inherited from her, just knew what he had that his dad didn't. Black hair, freckles, long fingers, thick eyelashes, the ability to sit still for spans of time longer than 10 minutes.

His phone buzzed in his hands, jolting him from his thoughts. Roman texted him. 

_Nana understands the concept of me liking boys nstead of girls. She does not however understand that I am not dating a woman named Veronica._

Virgil laughed. Patton looked up at him, "I'm laughing at Roman."

_FaceTime?_

Virgil stood up and walked into his bedroom to make the call. Roman looked good even with how pixelated the screen made him look.

"Thank god. Please help me." Roman said. He carried the phone over to an old woman on a couch. He sat next to her and held the phone in front of them both, "Nana, this is my boyfriend Virgil. I'm not cheating on Veronica. Veronica was imaginary, like Bing Bong."

"Oh that was just such a good movie. Bing Bong was so precious. What a good imaginary friend." The old woman said.

"Yeah, exactly. Veronica was imaginary, she's not real. Ask Virgil, my actual boyfriend since more than a year and a half ago." He pointed to the phone.

"I thought you had a girlfriend. What was her name?" She asked him. Roman sighed.

"Hello, I'm Virgil. He never had a girlfriend, not even a little bit." He said.

"Then why did he say he did?" She asked him.

"Because, Nana, I knew I would need to sit and explain to you that I was gay and that I didn't like girls." Roman told her.

"Oh but you have to like girls, you're dating one right now." She told him.

"I'm Veronica." Virgil finally said, "Roman didn't want to tell you he liked boys so he changed my name to a girl's name."

"Oh, well why didn't you say that?" She lightly slapped Roman's arm.

"What the hell do you think I've been doing the past 45 minutes." He muttered under his breath.

"So what's your real name?"

"Virgil. I'm Roman's boyfriend." He explained.

"Isn't that so sweet. How long have you two been dating?" She asked.

"Two years in March." Virgil told her. Roman looked like he just relaxed and remembered to breathe.

"Your hair is absolutely lovely. Where do you get it done?" She asked.

"Thank you, I actually just dyed in in my kitchen." He said with a smile. She gasped at him and continued questioning him about their relationship.

"Okay, Nana. Virgil has to go now, but he's coming over for Christmas so you can see him then." Roman promised. He waved goodbye and ended the call. He hurried back downstairs and went to watch a movie with his dad.


	34. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Comfort

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After the * there's a little bit of some sexy times going down. Just a little, just a hint of sexy.

Emma was an old friend of Patton's and he loved her dearly. She lived a few hours away, so they never really got to see each other anymore. She moved away a few years ago, when Virgil was 14. She was always helping someone out, giving them a place to stay until they got back on their feet, babysitting kids, holding parties. Because of that, she was known as Auntie Em, and Patton missed her so much. They had been talking about holiday plans for the past few days now, just to talk about something.

_You should come visit us for New Year's. I wanna meet your new boyfriend and make sure he's good for you. And Virgil's basically my kid, so I need to check his out too._

Patton smiled at her text.

**Nothing going on as of late, I'll talk to them and see.**

_I wanna see old Papa Patton again_

They talked some more and Patton started getting excited to see her. It had been a few years since they last visited, and Virgil loved her so much. His excitement was dulled when he saw Emily's face pop up on his phone screen. His stomach turned like he wanted to throw up.

_So have any plans yet?_

She was asking about plans for her to see Virgil again.

**No**

He felt like to was walking on eggshells. Except Logan explained to him that it was fine to walk on a lot of eggshells because of science. A little bit of eggshells would still break, but a lot of eggshells would be fine. Logan was so smart.

_We haven't really caught up have we? Are you seeing anyone? Just curious lol_

**Yeah, I am**

He tried to remember tricks that helped Virgil. There was a lot of breathing stuff, but he couldn't remember what. There was that thing Logan did to him a few days ago. Maybe he could try that. 

_Really!?! What's her name? Can I have a picture? Lmao_

Five things he could see. Virgil's ukulele, the mug of hot chocolate on the coffee table, the TV wasn't on, that remote wasn't quite straight, the big fluffy turqouise blanket was thrown over the back of the couch. He picked it up and wrapped himself up.

**Not a she**

His heart pounded in his chest. What if she got mad at him? Stop. He needed to slow down. He took a sip of his hot chocolate. Four things he could touch. The mug was warm in his hands, the blanket felt soft on his skin, the couch was nice and squishy, even the air around him felt nice on his face.

_Oh. I see. What about Virgil?_

**Knew he liked boys before I did**

Three things he could hear. His breathing was fast, some birds outside were chirping, he could hear the heat in the house turning on.

_OK then. So are you confused or was I just your gay expiriment?_

**I'm pansexual. I like everyone, not just boys and not just girls.**

_So you're confused_

**No, I'm not. I know exactly what I like, and I like everyone.**

Two things he could smell. The hot chocolate still lingering in the air, and the smell of lavender soap wafting from the blanket.

_Whatever you say. Is your little pillow biter into all your weird fetishes?_

**Don't call him that.**

_Then answer my question._

**Why do you care?**

_I asked you first_

**I asked you second**

One thing he could taste. Chocolate on his tongue. With whipped cream and peppermint.

_Fine. Don't answer then. What's his name?_

**Logan**

_Last name?_

**No. You're going to stalk his social media if I do that.**

_Quit being a pussy._

**I need to go**

Patton immediately texted Logan and asked if he could come over when he was done working. Logan said it was fine and as soon as he got home Patton went over. They sat on Logan's bed and Patton crawled into a little ball ontop of him. His head was buried into Logan's tummy. He handed him the phone and told him to read the messages. Logan's hand ran through his hair gently.

"Patton, you handled this really well, you know that?" He asked. Patton didn't want to answer, so he snuggled in closer, "You did a good job."

"I don't want her anymore." Patton said. He didn't know what he meant by that, but he meant what he said and he said what he meant, an elephant's faithful 100%.

"I know, it's alright. We'll scare her off." Logan promised.

"What?" Patton looked up.

"Well, she's obviously not comfortable with being gay, so let's shove it down her throat until she leaves." Logan said.

"Seriously?" Patton rested his cheek back on Logan's stomach so he could still see him.

"Yeah. Virgil already wears skirts and crop tops. When she comes to see him make sure he's wearing both, and makeup, possibly nail polish. Have Roman over, you know he can't resist singing Broadway, and Virgil knows every trigger. Wear your pride shirt you got, I have a necklace I can wear. We'll do whatever the opposite of pray the gay away is. That way she either has to get used to it, or she has to leave you alone. Either way, it's good for us." Logan said. Patton giggled.

"Walking in public holding hands would be enough to make her mad, this'll be amazing." He said. He could picture her face now, and nothing made him happier than that thought. He crawled farther up the bed and kissed Logan. He smiled and wrapped his arms around his neck, 

*

"Can I try something while we kiss? You're allowed to tell me to stop of you don't like it."

"I guess." Logan shrugged. Patton slipped a hand around his throat and continued kissing him. Logan whimpered as he squeezed lightly. Patton was careful to go slow, he wanted to ease him into this, not throw it at him all at once. Logan whined against his lips and clawed at his shirt. Patton growled, letting the sound roll over the man beneath him. Logan slowly brought his hands back up to rest by the sides of his head. Patton nipped at his bottom lip. Logan squirmed.

"How is this?" Patton asked. He needed to know what he thought before he was willing to do anything with the information.

"Good. Great. Amazing. Tighter." Logan requested. Patton tightened his grip on his neck. Logan mewled happily.

"This is a good one?" Patton asked. He wanted a list of good and bad so he knew what to avoid.

"Hell yes it's a good one. Please kiss me again." Logan said. Patton kissed him again.

~*~

Minutes later, he was lulling him to sleep. Logan made them slow down, because he was getting too excited too quickly, and he had started yawning. Patton had become a master at putting people to sleep when they didn't want to, so he took it upon himself to make sure Logan napped. He stroked his hair softly and told him stories. Logan's head ended up on his chest with his arms around his waist.

"I love you, baby." Patton told him.

"I love you too." Logan muttered quietly. Patton watched his eyes flutter shut as he began to drift off. Patton felt his own eyelids droop and soon they were both fast asleep.


	35. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Introspection

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a bit of a scene describing Roman's disease that I really don't want to type out again. It nothing graphic or anything, but if it's something that you're particularly sensitive to, it's near the end.

Roman was wrapping Virgil's gift. It had come in a little, black, velvet box. He wasn't used to wrapping things so little, and he was struggling. He had gone his entire life think grand gestures of affection had to be larger than life, and yet the biggest show of love he had ever shown up to this point was small enough to fit in the palm of his hand. How could this tiny little thing hold so much weight? He remembered the conversation he'd had with Patton.

"Just to be clear, this isn't a proposal?" Patton asked. Roman shook his head.

"We're way too young for that. I'm a hopeless romantic, but I know Virgil wouldn't appreciate it." He answered, "It's more just to show him that I love him and that, at the moment, the idea is on the table for consideration at a later date."

"Then I'm all for it. I know from experience that it can get expensive, so if you need help then let me know and I'll see what I can do." Patton said. Roman smiled.

In the end, he managed to pay for it on his own. However, it took out a large chunk of his wallet. He was already looking for more auditions or odd jobs he could do in the meantime. There was a theater that was putting on a production of Moulin Rouge, auditions opened in just a few days. Maybe he could convince Virgil to come with for moral support. They needed a two minute song, maybe he could convince Virgil to sing a duet with him. He could use the excuse that there's a lot of duets in the show, and he needed to show he could duet. If he was really lucky, they would like Virgil's singing enough to consider him for the show. Then he could finally get that beautiful voice in the world and out of his bedroom alone drowned under layers of music that was too loud.

He tied a ribbon around the now candy cane striped box. This he could do, he could tie ribbon in beautiful ways. It might be a bit early, but he was excited and didn't want to forget. He pictured Virgil's face when he would see what was inside the little package. Roman smiled and set it on his desk. He got up and went to see what his parents were up to. Ever since he was little he thought it was funny how his parents managed to be named Philip and Rose, just like Sleeping Beauty. His mom had the brightest, bluest eyes Roman had ever seen. Her hair was warm, like chocolate, and fell in long waves around her shoulders. Her bangs were cut just above her eyebrows. Naturally, she was blonde, but she didn't like how monochromatic she thought she looked. She was thin, but still healthy looking. Roman's dad had thick, square glasses that were too big for his face and dark hair that was graying at the temples. He had Heterochromia. His eyes were brown, but about a third of his right eye was green. It was a trait he had passed on to his son, just not as stark. The outside of his iris was green, and the inside toward to pupil was brown. Most people just assumed they were hazel.

His dad was on the couch reading a book about technology advancements during World War I. Roman could frankly care less, but his dad seemed to find it interesting. His mom was washing dishes.

"Did you know that they invented flamethrower as an alternative to grenades?" His dad announced from the couch.

"Why? Grenades seemed to work just fine." Roman asked.

"Well, they did good at neutralizing the enemy, but not so good at maintaining structural support. If they destroyed enemy bunkers they couldn't take them over and use them." His dad explained. Roman nodded.

"Makes sense." He shrugged and sat down next to him. He smiled at the rainbow heart ornament hanging on their tree. He never really came out to his parents, he never felt the need.

When he was little he would come home from school and tell his mom about all the cute boys in his class. By the time middle school rolled around, he would tell them about how hot Captain America was. His mom would argue that she was more of a Thor man, and his dad would say he liked Black Widow, because she was the only girl in the movie. He never thought he was straight, and when no one reacted negatively, he never pretended he was. Combined with the love of musical theater, and flower crowns, and Lady Gaga, and anything rainbow, it was hard for him to fly under the radar. His coming out was introducing Virgil to them for the first time.

"When's that audition you were going to?" His mom asked him.

"Thursday. I might bring Virgil with and I may or may not trick him into duet in with me for the audition, you can't prove anything." He said. His mom laughed.

"His voice is good enough for that?" She questioned.

"I'd argue his voice is better than mine. That's not a compliment one should take lightly, either." He said.

"Don't worry, I know." She said. Roman giggled to himself, "What do you think you'll sing."

"Maybe a song from La La Land." He shrugged.

~*~

He had read his lines with Virgil, giving it his best for the line of people sitting in front of him. And now it was time for the song.

"Now we're giving preference to duets, since it does play such a large role. I don't know if or how you want to do that." They said.

"I can sing with Virgil." Roman said. Virgil blushed.

"No, I'm not a singer. I can just go ask someone else to sing with you. They'll be better at it than I will." Virgil tried to shy away.

"Nonsense, your voice is amazing." He promised. Virgil hid his face in his hands. Roman started singing, Virgil knew this song by heart now, "The sun is nearly gone/the lights are turning on/a silver shine that stretches to the sea/we've stumbled on a view/that's tailor made for two/what a shame those two are you and me."

He sang, forcing Virgil to sing along to his part. As the need for Virgil's voice neared, he grew more nervous. Roman held his hand for comfort and started dancing around, hoping he'd join in. He did, Roman let him take the spotlight for that one, since he could dance about as well as a fish on a dock. Virgil didn't do anything fancy, but it did seem to relax him as he sang. They modified the song just a bit so it would fit under the two minute rule. When they finished Roman smiled and gave a little bow. The four people quietly muttered under their breath and turned to the pair. 

"Thank you, Roman I think you've got a good chance of getting in. We'll call. Virgil, would you mind staying for just a moment?" They asked. Virgil blushed, but he did nod. Roman squeezed his hand and quietly left the room. He waited out in the lobby for Virgil to meet back up. He came out with a flyer, he was grinning. 

"What did they want?" Roman asked. Virgil handed him the flyer.

"They said that I was an amazing singer and dancer for being put on the spot so much. They said I should consider going in for dancer auditions." He said. Roman beamed at him and scooped him up in a hug so tight he lifted Virgil off the floor.

"I told you you had an amazing voice. Do you think you'll go?" He asked. Virgil shrugged.

"I probably won't get in. Who knows how many people will show up." He said.

"Yeah, but are you going?"

"Should I?" He asked.

"You absolutely should. If you don't get a part, oh well you're untrained and didn't have your heart set on it, if you do then that would be amazing and you could be on stage with me." Roman pointed out. Virgil nodded.

"Then I'll go." He said. Roman kissed him and they walked out to the car. He brought Virgil back home with a kiss goodbye and a wave to Patton. He came back inside and related the whole story to his parents.

"What if he gets the Roxanne part? There's a pretty high chance you'll preform with him if that happens. Ewan McGregor and the creepy rapist both are there in the movie, and in this they'll probably bring out a lot of the other characters." His dad told him.

"You're right. I could sing with Virgil on stage. That would be amazing." Roman let the possibility roll around in his head. He could watch Virgil dance for real, not just goofy dancing they did when they were bored.

"You guys have so much love to give each other." His mom said.

"Except he doesn't have enough love for himself, and I have more than enough, so I give him a little extra." He said. They talked a while more before Roman went upstairs to do homework. He needed to read for English class. The class read excerpts from different classic novels and rated them on difficulty and interest level. Virgil got _Frankenstein_ , Roman got _The Once and Future King_. He wondered how Virgil was handling group discussions on his own. He hoped they would go alright.

The pressure in his head started building. He got a pair of headphones out with his phone just in case. He remembered watching cartoons when he was little. Sometimes when characters were thinking about a problem too hard, their heads would grow and expand. That's what it felt like. Like his head was just growing bigger and bigger until it became top heavy and he toppled over. He'd tried massages before, but it wasn't muscle tension. The fluid in his skull built up too much and literally became too full, pressure made it worse. He just relaxed on his bed and waited for it to pass. He'd gotten used to the intense pressure that sometimes built up. He could feel his vision starting to go, so he plugged in his headphones and played music.

The curtain behind his eyes shut and he was left in complete darkness. He could still remember the first time it happened. First the feeling of his skull being forced open from the inside out, and then going completely blind. Roman thought he was dying. As a 14 year old, he panicked. He didn't know what was happening. He had cried and just told his mom over and over again that he couldn't see. He couldn't see. He couldn't see. His mom held his cheeks gently and tried to calm him back down. By the time they got in the car to drive to the hospital, Roman's vision had come back, but his head hurt.

He had an MRI done and the doctors told him what was wrong. He spit out the fancy words that Roman knew by heart now. He listened to his music and stared at nothing. His eyes weren't doing anything, so eventually they fluttered shut. In just a few minutes, Roman fell asleep.


	36. Filler

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil meets a pretty girl.
> 
> Patton doesn't wear pants.
> 
> Roman goes for a walk.
> 
> Logan is only sort of an adult.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I messed up. I intended to have a new chapter posted every few days until I started 12 Days of Christmas. Apparently I did not plan it out well enough, so I wrote this filler chapter for you guys to tide you over for another few days. I'm so excited about this Christmas thing I'm doing and I think you'll all have a really great time with it.

Virgil read requirements a million times. Luckily he didn't need to bring any sort of dance shoes or clothes or anything. His dad had wanted to come so badly but agreed to let Virgil do this on his own. Virgil was no dancer beyond the odd move he learned from watching Kpop music videos. The only other time he'd ever admitted to enjoying the genre at all was when he was spilling his secrets to Roman. The only time he ever let himself indulge in his guilty pleasure was when he was locked in his room with headphones on. He'd picked up a few words here and there, and could follow the dances decently by memory.

He walked into the studio. Hardwood floors and neutral gray walls. Long wooden rods were bolted to three of the walls. One wall was just a line of floor to ceiling mirrors. There was a corner where everything important was shoved. There was a little table with a big speaker, a laptop, and a few water bottles. Next to the table was a small piece of cardboard, it looked like a modified box you would get a t-shirt from amazon in. Shallow walls and fairly square. It was full of amber pieces of something that looked like rock candy. The floor by the box was sticky. He saw people around, talking, or warming up. Most in sneakers, t-shirts and basketball shorts. There was a girl in satin shoes standing on her toes using the wooden rod as a support. She raised her leg up behind her, quickly lowered it again, bounced up on her toes then back down on her feet a few times before frowning and walking to the box. She tapped the tips of her shoes in the box and rubbed it in on the floor. Virgil was too curious about it to really feel anxious. He walked up to her and tapped her shoulder.

"I'm not a ballerina, and I'm really curious about this. What exactly does it do?" He asked when she turned to look at him.

"Oh, it's resin. When your on pointe you want a lot of friction to help you balance. The resin is just a little sticky so it helps keep me keep my balance a little better. Same reason I cut the stain off the platform." She explained. Virgil looked down and saw that she in fact had cut away the silky fabric to expose rough canvas beneath it.

"That's so cool. Did they ask if you could audition with the uhm-"

"En pointe. I dance en pointe. No, but that's how I'm best trained and sometimes it can be a cool thing to have a background character en pointe." She said with a shrug, "What do you do?"

"Oh, well, the thing is I'm not exactly trained. My boyfriend insisted on bringing me to auditions with him. He sort of roped me into singing a duet with him and to help me relax he sort of jokingly started dancing with me. Apparently I was really good, because they asked if I could come to these auditions." Virgil explained. She nodded.

"They're really picky about dancers here, so you must've done amazing. The trick to dance is posture. Keep your head high, back straight, and shoulder back. You want to make your neck and chest look as long as you can. Keep the muscles in your stomach and you ass tight, it'll help with balance." She told him with a smile.

"Thanks. I assumed everyone here would be really competitive so I didn't really expect to get advice." Virgil said to her. She laughed.

"That's true for just about everyone but me. Come on I'll show you some moves while we wait." She walked back out to the floor and positioned Virgil where she wanted him, "A good thing to know is turns. When you turn, turn your head separately from your body. Focus on one point in front of you and look away from it as little as you possibly can. It'll help keep you from getting dizzy."

Virgil nodded. She started showing him the steps for how to turn. She stepped out on her toes, feet spread wide one on front of the other. Her arms were outstretched at a right angle. Virgil copied her position. She stepped out of her pose and adjusted his, tilting his chin up, moving his arms, turning his hips the right way. She showed him the next step. The opposite foot forward, knees bent, one arm curved in front of her, the other out to her side. Again she adjusted Virgil. The last step was to bring your outstretched arm in to form a circle with your arms and bring your foot to your knee. She demonstrated all the steps together and spun around quickly three times before stopping, gracefully extending her leg out behind her and leaving her arms at the right angle they were at the beginning. Virgil did his best to replicate what he saw. When he stopped spinning, he looked at her for approval.

"That was almost perfect. And you managed a triple. You're sure you've never trained before?" She asked. Virgil nodded.

"If you can copy people that well, you'll have no problem getting in." She said, "One more tip because it's about to start. They're going to have a tango portion of the audition. Tango is passionate and sexy, maybe a little bit dominating. For this show, think of it as sort of hate sex. You said you had a boyfriend. When they start looking for tango, think about all the times he's pissed you off and all the times the windows steamed up. Bottle up that feeling and project it back out at everyone in the room."

Virgil blushed and nodded. He felt very small next to her, especially when she stood on her toes. She had a good three inches on him. But he trusted her to help him give his all.

"What's your name?" She asked.

"Virgil." He answered.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Steph." She said, "You're going to be amazing."

He smiled at her and learned a few more steps. When the tango came, he pictured so many things. His precious Kpop no one was allowed to know about, and within it the Internet Wars video that made him blush and squirm when he watched it. He pictured Roman when he flirted, hooded eyes, tongue peaking out the corner of his stupid smirk. He pictured an image he'd never seen. Roman on stage, wearing his prince costume, running his hands down the bakers wives waist, kissing her, seducing someone that wasn't Virgil. He let all those feelings bubble up in his belly and he let them take over as he danced.

~*~

Virgil was at an audition, leaving Patton home alone for a few hours. Meaning no more pants. He scavenged the cupboards for sweets and sat on the couch with his bounty of treats. He snuggled up and turned on the TV. He turned on one of his favorite shows, and his ultimate guilty pleasure, _the Bachelorette_. It was cheesy, and over dramatic, and took itself way too seriously, and Patton loved every second. This was his favorite pastime, eating candy while he watched this awful show wearing nothing but boxers and an old t-shirt.

He binge watched this awful show. Watching her dates, developing opinions on the different suitors. Each rose ceremony made his heart beat loudly in his chest. Would she pick Brian, the tall, dark, and handsome gentleman with chivalry to spare? Or would she pick Michael, the sexy blond who bit his lips and endless mountains of flirting capability? Patton's favorite was Collin. He was a little awkward and nerdy, a little shy, but charming. He had dimples and thick, square glasses framing his brilliant blue eyes. His brown hair was usually messy, but not untamable as evidenced by how much he cleaned up on dates.

Halfway through the season he realized why he liked him so much. He reminded him so much of Logan. Lanky and timid, but a charming way. Sometimes he used words that were too big, but it was okay because he was doing his best. He stopped paying attention to the show to think about how pretty his boyfriend was. When he got excited he would try and hide his smile by biting his lips. His nose crinkled up when he laughed. He got grabby in subspace and just wanted Patton to hold him. Sometimes he forgot what something was called in English and in order to get Patton to understand he would repeat the word in a few different languages, signing as he did so. Sometimes Patton could figure it out, the word sounded the same, or the sign made it obvious, but other times he was completely clueless. Logan would have to describe what he was talking about. Once he forgot the word for turkey. Patton couldn't figure out what he meant, so Logan pouted and tried to explain what a turkey was.

"It's like a chicken but angrier and bigger. And when you're a kid you put paint on your hand and put it down on a piece of paper. You draw on it and it makes the thing." Logan said.

"Do you mean a turkey?" Patton asked.

"Yes, thank you." Logan continued with his story. Patton loved him so much. He was so precious, he needed to be protected at all costs.

He blinked back to reality, she picked Michael. Patton booed at the TV and shoved an Oreo in his mouth. His phone buzzed at, him. A Snapchat from Virgil. He was recording a ballerina at auditions with him. From the waist down, she looked like a traditional ballerina, pink tights, a black skirt, and her pretty shoes. From the waist up she looked like she just rolled out of bed. Her t-shirt was tied around her waist with a hairtie, exposing her belly, her hair pulled back in a messy ponytail. But her dancing was glorious. She climbed up to her toes so gracefully as she hopped around.

_Break time at auditions. Say hi to Steph_

Patton smiled, his boy made a friend. He took a picture of the window, trying his best not to expose his secret.

_Hi Steph! You're such a pretty dancer!_

He typed back. He turned his attention back to his show.

"Ricky is such a sweetheart." This seasons bachelorette said to the camera, "And he's so sexy."

A clip played of him at the beach. He was totally ripped, "But he's kind of mean to David. Like, it's not his fault he's got the Daddy vibe going on."

Patton choked on his own spit. Another clip of David played. His hair was almost completely gray at 40, his face wrinkled in a way that made him look wise and happy. He was wearing a sweater over a button down shirt. He really did have a Daddy vibe, but Patton had a hard time hearing that word without his interest getting peaked. The only exception to the rule was when he was talking to a kid, or someone in little space. Sometimes he'd forget that there was another meaning to that word, and he'd go to Hobby Lobby to buy Virgil something for a school project and he'd go into the decoration aisle and see a sign that said Daddy's Little Girl in pastel pink cursive font. He'd have a split second of _Bold move Hobby Lobby._ before realizing it was probably intended to be in a small child's bedroom.

He remembered when Logan said he wanted to call him Daddy, a small part of Patton clapped and giggled like Darcy in _Finding Nemo_.

He took a deep breath and tried to flush out the redness that had to be in his face.

~*~

Roman may have lied a little bit about not touching anything but weed that one time. Just a little. He didn't drink often, and when he did it wasn't much, but he still did. His parents found out and told him they wouldn't encourage him until he was old enough to drink, but they would be hypocritical if they said he couldn't anymore. Which is why he was sitting in his room with a glass of wine while he watched _Hairspray_ for the millionth time.

This movie made him want to sing, which made him want to act, which put him on stage. It embedded an appreciation for dancing and vintage culture. It taught him at a very young age that you should never judge people based on one or two qualities any one person might have. He'd always wanted to play Link Larkin, but his dance abilities were lacking. Unlike what he'd seen from Virgil, who could move in a way that was almost hypnotic. Technically, he just fine, not great, just fine. But he managed to fill his movements with so much feeling and emotion that he made up for every other error. Maybe that could be a new outlet for him. He could take lessons and learn to expel anything negative through something healthy. If he ate right and kept up his attempt at gaining weight, he could probably build some decent muscle.

Roman sipped at his wine and watched his movie. He was about halfway through when he decided he needed to move around. He finished off his wine and walked outside. He air was cold against his face. He walked around the neighborhood, just thinking. He remembered something super random that Virgil told him during his confessions. He really liked Kpop. Roman had always thought it was just a little strange, but he wanted to get involved for Virgil. He sent a quick text.

**Send me Kpop stuff you like. Videos songs insta accounts wtevs**

It took some time for Virgil to respond with links, almost 10 minutes. That was weird, he usually responded immediately. Oh well, he was probably in the middle of something. Roman passed by the mailbox. They didn't have individual mailboxes in the neighborhood, they had a communal mailbox. It was big and gray with little compartments for each house. Roman climbed up onto it and took out a pair of headphones. After he plugged everything in, he tapped the first link.

A video titled _Hansol Sexy Dance (IU-Jam Jam)_ popped up. As the video started to play, Roman decided this was Virgil's polar opposite. It opened up with a cute little Asian boy with fluffy black hair and a pair of thinly framed gold glasses looking at the camera. He had rosy cheeks and a cute little nose. He was wearing a pink dress shirt and a gray blazer sitting sideways on a chair in a white room with a few potted plants. As the camera zoomed out, you could see he was in fact wearing sweatpants. He started dancing along to the high pitched, yet still somehow soothing music. And he was good. He rolled his hips and bent over as he arched his back. Roman understood why it was called Sexy Dance, but when he saw the boy's face batting his thick eyelashes at the camera, he couldn't help but want to squish his cheeks. The video ended and Roman realized he actually had a really fun time watching it. It was cute, and sexy, and innocent, and a little coy.

Roman clicked the next link. He didn't bother reading the title since it was stated in bold red letters _Taemin-Thirsty_ the first few frames were just a man in a red suit laying on the floor in a red room with a white floor. Then a camera from above zoomed in and showed off his face. He was a little androgynous, full cheeks and lips with soft eyes and smooth black hair. It took exactly 22 seconds for Roman to be completely stunned by talent. The other boy was cute, but this one was downright seductive. He wasn't really doing anything sexual, or wearing anything sexual, but it still felt so sexy. No, that's not the right word. Sensual. It made Roman feel pretentious to call it that, but it was true. It was more mature, like a wine and candles and black lingerie type of sexy. By the end Roman felt intrigued and perfectly violated. He would have to remember this one's name.

The last link Virgil actually took the time to type next to _Think you'll like this one_. Roman read the title of the video. . The boy was whistling. Then all of a sudden, there were more of them. A group instead of one person, each of them wearing some sort of rainbow outfit. The saturation of the video made everything look animated. It was bright and colorful, and these boys could dance. Apparently, Virgil really liked dancers. They were all so pretty. He liked the guy who whistled the most. This was a happy video, but not like a party happy. It was more like how you feel when you work really hard on something and it turns out well. That feeling of immense joy and excitement. Roman actually really liked it. He typed out a text back.

**First one. It's so cute and he's adorable. Second one. Dear god this man does things to me that I can't explain. I've been seduced, goodbye. Third one, loved it. I like the one that was whistling and the one with the orange hair.**

Again, it took a while for Virgil to respond. Roman walked back home and got another glass of wine before getting the next text.

_First boy is Hansol. He's adorable and ace. Second one is Taemin. Proof that God is real. Third is a group called BTS. They've gotten popular in America the past while. My favorite was only in that song a little, he had blue hair. I could send another song he did on his own if you're interested._

**Please >u<**

_Don't make that face again._

A few seconds later, another link came through. Roman watched another music video. This one a rap video. He was stuck to a chair, rocking it back and forth trying to escape. About halfway through the video he managed to break out and bust down the door, where he was on a train. He flipped off the camera and smirked. The end of the video was the opportunity to watch him smash cars and light things on fire. All while rapping about his name. It was dirty and grungy and fun to watch. Not Roman's cup of tea, but exciting to see. He fully understood why Virgil would pick this one as a favorite. The rest of the day was spent by Roman watching various videos Virgil sent to him. He had to admit, it was growing on him.

~*~

Logan hated grading. It was boring and monotonous. But he was a teacher, it's part of his job. He settled down on the couch with a stack of papers and a pen. Recently, there have been a few new additions to the routine. Logan wasn't entirely sure why, but they made the work more bearable so Logan wasn't going to complain. He wrapped the blanket around his shoulders and set his penguin in his lap. He sucked lightly on the pacifier in his mouth. He wasn't really in that weird place yet, but he was somewhere in the middle. He really liked his pacifier, even when he wasn't little. It was comforting to have something in his mouth all the time. A part of him wanted a whole collection, a box of pacifiers that he could pick from whenever he wanted. Maybe he could buy more, or maybe be could ask Patton for more.

He'd done some research on this weird new thing that seemed to address as being little. He learned there were two types of little space, age play, and age regression. Age play was sexual, a power exchange between two adults. Acting like a child as a kink. Age regression, on the other hand, wasn't at all sexual. It was putting yourself in the mindset of a child, thus giving up any and all adult responsibilities. Any sexual advances wouldn't be consensual, because a child can't give consent.

Patton seemed to know the difference between the two. He could recognize what Logan wanted in that moment. Logan wasn't entirely sure how he could tell the difference so easily. Maybe Logan acted differently, but if he did he couldn't tell. Patton could tell, and somehow he could separate that in his brain. He heard his phone buzz. Patton sent a selfie with a filter that made him look like a bunny.

_Watcha doin?_

Logan took a picture of his mountain of papers.

**Grading**

_Sounds boring. I miss you lots :(_

Patton had switched over to the chat option. He could've just texted. Oh well, Patton never made complete sense to him.

**When I'm done I can come over. I really need to hand these back to kids.**

_Ugh. Fine. I'll wait till you're done._

Logan turned his phone off and went back to work. He'd gotten two of his periods done yesterday. Virgil's class happened to be on today's bundle. Amy did good, a few messed up calculations, but good. Her handwriting was incredible, but the doodles around the border made her work look messy. Logan saw her drawing of a UFO and drew a little log cabin with his pen next to her doodle. He drew a speech bubble coming from inside the cabin, "Gerald, get the camera! The neighbors will have to believe us this time!"

Roman wrote like a founding father. Big, swirly cursive that was impossible to gain any information from. He wrote his name weirdly. Sometimes each letter was spaced out to fill up nearly the entire line, sometimes it was all crammed together in an indecipherable mess a centimeter and a half long. Logan struggled through, almost giving up at the halfway point. Roman had a really hard time with math. His brain wasn't letting the numbers fit together the right way. Several answered were scribbled out. On the more difficult problems, he wrote in pen instead of pencil, meaning he had to do the work in two sessions. On the back of the paper Logan wrote him a note. _Ask Virgil for help_. He knew that Roman wouldn't dare swallow his pride and ask for help unless someone told him he had to.

Ben did alright, he got the easy problems right and the more difficult problems mostly right. Anytime he had to explain his answer he'd give a really sarcastic answer. When he was in Logan's geometry class, they had the obligatory find x problem. He circled the x on the triangle and drew an arrow to some writing. _JK dead meme it's 7_. And he was right, so Logan couldn't mark him down.

Virgil's paper was perfect. He got his answers in sometimes odd ways, but he was always right. If he had to explain an answer he'd simply write out an equation or draw a picture of what he did, never words. If there was a typo in a problem he'd cross it out and correct it himself. He was a unique kid, he could really go places if he let himself. According to Patton he was actually going to a dance audition. Hopefully he made it in so that Logan could see him preform.

Logan took a break to get something to drink. He stood up, holding his penguin in his hand. He got a cup down from his cupboard and filled it with water. He pulled out his pacifier and sipped at his water. Part of him wished he had Patton here to remind him to use both hands in case he spilled. He would just have to make do. He settled back down and worked on more papers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Links:
> 
> [ Internet Wars](https://youtu.be/ex0gwAJ7wcI)   
>  [Hansol IU Jam Jam](https://youtu.be/YqIklDV-XbE)   
>  [Taemin-Thirsty](https://youtu.be/D25FPfkZ0GI)   
>  [DNA BTS](https://youtu.be/MBdVXkSdhwU)   
>  [Agust D (aka car smashy smashy) ](https://youtu.be/3Y_Eiyg4bfk)


	37. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me, a pride flag in a small tree

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first day of Christmas! Yay! I'm so excited about this, I have a bunch of chapters written in advance so we should be all good to go. Happy Holidays everyone!

"Why aren't your Christmas decorations up yet?" Patton asked. Logan shrugged. He wasn't a very festive person, he never really decorated.

"I'm always gone, so why decorate?" He pointed out.

"Because it's Christmas and it's fun. Do you have any decorations?" He asked.

"A few. I think it's all stuff from when I was a kid." Logan said.

"Go get it. We're decorating." Patton pulled him up off the couch. Logan rolled his eyes and opened the door to his basement, "You can go get it, I will stay up here."

"Alright. Is Virgil as afraid of spiders as you are?" Logan rolled his eyes and smiled.

"Yeah. If we see a spider in the house we sort of just avoid that room for a few days and pray that it either dies or leaves." Patton explained.

"But they aren't scary. They're happy little friends that eat bugs for us." He said.

"No. Have you seen Lord of the Rings? Spiders are evil. They will stab you and eat you and leave your bones in their caves." He said, completely serious.

"Whatever you say. I'll be back." He went downstairs and came back up with his box of Christmas decorations. Patton sat him down on the floor and started pulling things out. He examined a statue of a ballerina, including the pedastle she stood on she was about the size of Logan's forearm. He took her gently from Patton's hands and twisted the statue. As she spun back around, she played music from the Nutcracker.

"That's beautiful." Patton smiled at the music box.

"I made her actually." Logan said, "Well I made the insides. Valerie did the sculpting. I just made it play music."

"You did?" Patton's eyes widened. Logan nodded, "It's so pretty. We're definitely leaving that out."

He took out a snowglobe that looked like a fishbowl. A goldfish in a bubble, the insides painted like kelp. Again, a creation of Logan's. And then Patton took out a stuffed bear with big round glasses and a plaid vest. Logan pulled him out of his hands and held him.

"I haven't seen this bear since I was a kid. I used to love him so much." He smiled.

"Does he have a name?"

"Angus McDonald." Logan answered, "The world's greatest boy detective."

"Well, we can put Angus out too." Patton smiled, "You can keep him with you if you want."

Logam set the bear in his lap and watched more decorations come out. Most of it was either stuff he made, or stuff he kept from being a kid. And then at the bottom of the box, Logam had completely forgotten about that little container. He blushed as Patton opened it. Mostly ornaments, but a few other little things. A little glittery rainbow ornament saying _Pride_ in curly cursive writing. A black rectangle with the two little white rectangles on it, equality. He had a case of little flags. 

"I, uhm, went to a Christmas pride festival thing a few years ago and got a whole bunch of stuff that just sort of sits there." He explained.

"I see. Want to put some up?" Patton bit his lip and smiled.

"Oh my god, I don't even have a tree." Logan said. Patton stood up and held out his hand.

"We're getting you one." He insisted.

Logan had to admit, this was not what he was expecting. Patton was helping him pick out a little tree. Not the big ones that sit in your living room and people compete over, the tiny ones that people put in their bedrooms. He picked the normal green one, and they went back. Patton helped him set up the little tree and put on some ornaments that were too big for it. Patton picked up two of Logan's flags and stuck them in the top like tree toppers. One was rainbow, the other, pink, blue, and yellow.

"One for you and one for me." He hugged Logan from behind and kissed his cheek. Logan covered his face and smiled, "Hey Logan. Guess what?"

"What?"

"You're absolutely beautiful." He said. Logan blushed, "You know what would look great on you? A crop top. Like the tank top ones that are also kind of a sweater so it goes up to your neck."

"Absolutely not. You could see my entire stomach." Logan protested.

"Exactly." Patton muzzled up against him and left gentle kisses behind his ear. Logan burned red, "You have a beautiful tummy."

"Let's finish putting decorations up, okay?" Logan turned around and smiled. Patton nodded and kissed him. He picked up the music box and set it down on the table beside the couch, "Your fish needs a name."

"Steven. Where should we put Angus?" Logan asked. Patton picked him up and carried him to the TV stand. He adjusted him just a little and stepped back.

"How does that look?" Patton asked.

"I think it looks perfect." Logan was having a good time. He actually felt like Christmas was here and he could enjoy it. Steven went to sit on the other end of the TV stand with Angus. They hung a wreath up on the front door and made hot chocolate for their efforts. He got a text from Valerie.

_Guess who found old pictures from high school/college. Can I come give them to you?_

**Patton's over. Come if you want.**

_Even better >:D_

Logan rolled his eyes and sipped his hot chocolate. It was too sweet, but Patton made it, and Patton alone was sweet enough to rot the teeth out of his head so he didn't mind.

"Valerie found some pictures that she wants to drop off." He told him. Patton grinned.

"Pictures of you? We got to look through them. I want to see them all." Patton said. Logan shrugged, he didn't have anything to hide as far as he could remember. Granted the pictures were from a time in his life that may not have been his peak. Oh well. Valerie showed up a few minutes later, she had to go so she just dropped off the folder and the photo album and left.

Logan sat down next to Patton and opened up the folder. The first picture, Logan was maybe 14. He had a haircut like Justin Bieber and thick framed glasses. The only piercings so far were the two in his ears. He was holding up a peace sign, about a dozen bracelets were on his wrists. But he wore a yellow shirt still. His face was softer, a lot rounder, his dimples more pronounced. Same blue eyes, same nose, but everything else looked just a little different. They cycled through a few pictures of him with friends, his birthday party, a picture of him at a concert. Sophomore year is when he started gaining piercings, his clothes got darker, he stopped smiling for pictures. He remembered that that was the year he got his own camera, so it became more selfies and less pictures other people took of him. His hair had grown out, he rotated between glasses and contacts. The was a picture of a guy kissing his cheek.

"Who's that?" Patton asked.

"My very first boyfriend. To my mom, he was just a good friend, but obviously that was a lie. His name was Austin." Logan said. Patton smiled at the picture.

"I don't even remember what it was like to date in high school." Patton said.

"Fun, in an experimental sort of way. Boring in a romance sort of way. We were all broke and stupid. I think I only dated Austin because I got bored." Logan said. Patton giggled and kissed his cheek. He flipped to the next picture.

Slowly, they got to Junior year of high school. Which is when Logan got expirimental. There were pictures of him in cat ears and a collar with a bell on it, pictures of blood running down his lips from nose bleeds, biting things, flipping off the camera.

"No wonder you like calling me Daddy." Patton whispered to him while he held up a kitty picture. Logan wore fingerless gloves that looked like cat paws, one wrist was handcuffed. Logan blushed at the image of himself.

They found pictures after Logan dyed his hair red, a big chunk underneath his bangs so you see it through the gaps in his hair.

"You seemed like an absolute wild child." Patton said. Logan shrugged.

"Maybe a little bit, I feel that I've calmed down since then." He snuggled into his boyfriend. Senior year went a lot like Junior year for him, except he seemed to lose his glasses entirely. College was when the true regret emerged.

Mixed in with photos he took for his old MySpace page were photos he wished he burned. Mostly him laying in bed with various men, both shirtless. It was no mystery what they had just finished doing. There were pictures of the time he impersonated a stripper. A pair of denim shorts that could barely even be considered shorts anymore, a pair of fishnet stockings that ended a bit before the shorts began so you could see the thick black band at the top of them with bare skin to spare. His shorts were unzipped showing off a pair of neon green underwear to match his neon watermelon crop top. He'd found some heeled high top shoes apparently. He just sighed.

"You were so skinny. Did you ever eat?" Patton asked.

"Yeah, I ate a lot, I just didn't gain weight." Logan explained. Patton nodded.

"Your butt wasn't as good as it is now." Patton told him. Logan giggled, "I do still think you need to bring the crop top back. Not that crop top, but crop tops in general."

"I know." Logan said.

The next picture Logan remembered well. In the photo all you could see was the two topless men, back to chest. Logan's lips brushing against the man's cheek. The only thing out of place, the setting. They were in a classroom. He remembered sitting down on his lap and insisting they take a picture.

"That was my professor." Logan sighed. Patton's jaw dropped.

"That's him?" Patton asked. Logan nodded, "I can't blame you, he's got that sexy teacher thing going on."

"We can just move on." He went to flip to the next picture, until he realized what was next, "Actually, you know what. We should just put it away, we don't need to see any more of that."

"Logan, what did you find?" Patton asked using a teasing dad voice.

"Nothing." He tried to hide the picture. Patton kissed him. Logan instinctively relaxed into him. Patton snatched the picture away and broke the kiss to look at it.

In the photo, Logan was on his knees, hands on the floor between his legs. His nose was streaked with milky white fluid, his open mouth showed strings of the same substance connecting his tongue to the roof of his mouth. Patton just stared.

"You know what I'm thinking when I see this?" Patton asked.

"What?" Logan squirmed from embarrassment.

"What can I do to convince you to recreate this picture with me?" He whispered. Logan blushed, "Not right now, but sometime."

All he could do was nod.


	38. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me, two snowball fights.

It was their first snow, and did it snow. Nearly a foot of snow overnight. It was a mess trying to get to Roman's today, his parents were gone doing something or another and Virgil liked being able to just be with his boyfriend. While they sat together, Roman started tapping on his shoulder in a sort of rhythm.

"Do you wanna build a snowman? Come on let's go and play." He started singing. Virgil rolled his eyes, which only encouraged him to be more dramatic, drapaing himself across Virgil's lap like a Victorian lady that saw a mouse, "I never see you anymore, come out the door. It's like you've gone away. We used to be best buddies, and now we're not. I wish you would tell me why! Do you wanna build a snowman? It doesn't have to be a snowman."

"I'll go if it'll shut you up." Virgil smiled at him. Roman cheered and jumped up.

"Come on, let's get bundled up. It's cold." Roman said.

"Excuse you, I'm gay and don't know how to dress for the weather." Virgil pretend to be defensive. It was true though. He wore the exact same thing all year round. What could he say, he looked good in black and was willing to suffer. 

"Alright fine, come upstairs and I'll let you borrow some stuff." Roman said.

Once in his room, Virgil was handed a long sleeve shirt, a beanie, a pair of mittens, and a scarf.

"Put the shirt on under your jacket, I know you have short sleeves under that right now." Roman explained. Virgil pulled his shirt over his head and quickly as he could changed into the shirt that was a few sizes too big on him.

"I think it's a little big." Virgil held up his hands, completely covered by the sleeves.

"Oh yeah, I forgot how much smaller you are than I am." Roman walked over and rolled the sleeves up for him, "That'll work for now."

Virgil nodded and pulled his jacket back on. He pulled the beanie on soon followed by mittens. But now that his fingers were useless, he couldn't really tie the scarf around his neck.

"Roman, I need help." He said. Roman came back over, rolling his eyes.

"You're like a child aren't you, kitten." He said. Virgil pouted. Roman adjusted the scarf around his neck. Before he let go of Virgil he gently pulled him in for a kiss. Virgil whined and nuzzled against his chest, "I love you, princess."

"I love you too." Virgil muttered.

"Ready to go?" Roman asked, Virgil nodded. Roman brought him out to the front yard and started making a snowball. He rolled it up so it would be bigger and had Virgil do the same with a separate ball.

Roman helped Virgil set his ball on top. They found some rocks that they used for the face and twigs for arms. Roman was admiring their hard work and Virgil couldn't help himself. He bent over and picked up a handful of snow before throwing it at the back of Roman's head. Roman gasped and turned around. Virgil was too busy giggling to notice Roman getting ready to retaliate and he got hit in the shoulder.

Soon they were running around the snowman throwing handfuls of snow at each other until they were cold and sweaty and wet with melted snow. Virgil was shivering. Roman walked over to him and picked him up like the princess Roman always told him he was. An old woman walked out of the house across the street.

"Hi, Mrs. Coleman." Roman said with a smile, "I'd wave but my hands are a little full."

"I can see that." She said, "What are you boys up to?"

"Building a snowman. It sort of devolved into a snowball fight, but whatever. I think we'll head inside and make hot chocolate." Roman said.

"Oh, what fun. I was just about to head to the store. I might just bring you boys back a treat." She said.

"Don't worry about us. Be safe, the roads are icy." Roman told her.

"I will, Roman. Now make sure things don't get too heated in there, can't be naughty or Santa won't bring you anything and I may come bring you your treat." She said as she walked to the car. Roman laughed and carried Virgil inside.

"Who was that?" Virgil asked.

"Mrs. Coleman, she lives across the street. She couldn't have kids, so she's sort of an extra grandma. We bring her and her husband over for Thanksgiving and stuff since she doesn't have much family around anymore." Roman explained. Virgil nodded. Roman started getting supplies out for hot chocolate. Virgil quickly took them away from him.

"You're not cooking anything." Virgil told him, "Go sit and I'll make it."

"But I-"

"No. Do you want another incident with the ramen?" Virgil asked.

"But there's not even water this time." Roman tried his best to convince him.

"Listen, you managed to catch boiling water on fire. What's wrong with that sentence? Oh right, you lit water on fire. You're such a bad cook, you broke physics. I'm not letting you near anything more complicated than breakfast cereal." Virgil told him. Roman pouted and sat down while Virgil made them hot chocolate.

"I still need to figure out a gift for you." Virgil said. He was mostly just thinking out loud.

"I got your's. I'm really hoping you'll like it." Roman said, biting his lips.

"Why wouldn't I like it?"

"Because it's not so much a material gift, but a sort of symbolic gift and I don't know how you'll feel about the thought behind it. That's all you're getting about it from me." Roman crossed his arms. Virgil felt confused. Why wouldn't he appreciate something Roman obviously thought hard about? I guess he'd find out. He handed Roman the mug of hot chocolate. Someone knocked on the door. 

"Hello, I brought you boys the treat I promised you." Mrs. Coleman said when they opened the door. Roman thanked her and said she really didn't have to go out her way for them. She insisted, but then had to go. They shut the door and set the candy canes in the kitchen before moving to the couch. 

"Roman, how do you put so much trust in people?" Virgil asked.

"I don't know. I guess because I believe people generally don't want to hurt me." Roman said.

"But what if someone really does want to hurt you?" Virgil said.

"A good rule of thumb to have is people are bad liars. If something bad is going to happen you can tell, at least on a small scale." Roman explained, "If people have something planned, they usually let something slip before it's intended."

"But I'm still constantly afraid that you're lying to me and you don't actually love me." Virgil said.

"Why would I stay with you for nearly two years if I didn't love you?" Roman didn't panic and try to tell him that was insane. He used to do that until he realized it usually made Virgil feel worse. Now he helped him reason his way out of it.

"I guess because you'd be sadistic and like watching me think you have feelings for me." Virgil explained. Roman pulled him onto his lap. 

"Alright, fair point. Some people are like that. But, if that was the case I'd probably get bored with you after a few months at most. If we pretend that maybe that was my intention at the beginning, at this point I'd would have developed real feelings towards you. So any way you look at it I do love you or I wouldn't be here. I know that this won't make everything better and make all the bad thoughts go away, but maybe that could help you quiet them down a little." Roman said. Virgil snuggled into his neck.

"Is it weird a kind of wish a brought my collar with me?" Virgil asked. Roman put his mug on the table, making sure Virgil did the same. He picked him up and carried him to the bathroom. He set Virgil on the counter before rummaging around in some drawers before pulling out a strip of thick, black ribbon. He wrapped it around Virgil's neck and tied it with a bow.

"Not perfect, but it'll work. Not even sure why I have so many hair ribbons in here." Roman said. Virgil hugged his boyfriend, "Can I ask why you like the collars so much?"

"It makes me feel like I belong to someone, which sounds really weird but it's kind of comforting. Like you chose to say that I'm your's and you promise to take care of me." Virgil explained. Roman nodded.

"So to you, it's kind of like me writing my name on something to say that it's mine. But at the same time, I need to take care of that something and keep it safe." Roman said. Virgil nodded, "Makes sense. Feeling better?"

"Much. Thank you." Virgil said.

"When you want you collar, is it safe to assume that I can pamper the hell out of you and you won't get mad at me?" Roman asked. Virgil laughed.

"Yeah, you can pamper me when I'm in a collar mood." He told him.

"I should get you more, that way you can wear them whenever you want because you aren't stick with the one." Roman was mostly thinking out loud, Virgil knew his thinking face, "Come on, let's go finish our hot chocolate. You're going to sit on my lap and I'm going to love you so hard."

He picked Virgil back up and sat them both down on the couch once again. Virgil's insides felt warm and full. Right now, in this exact moment, he felt like he didn't have to worry. Nothing was wrong right now. He could finally relax, if only just for a moment.


	39. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me, three snowy kisses.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There a little bit of smutty at the end after the *

Patton was taking Logan out to look at all the Christmas decorations downtown. The trees were covered in lights that made them look like a bundle of stars, the snow glittered on the awning of shops and in patches where no one had walked. He dragged Logan along with him to look at all the shops. Logan wore a scarf and a wool coat, like Sherlock Holmes.

"Patton, could we go inside somewhere for a moment. It's cold." Logan said.

"Sure. But we still gotta go see the big Christmas tree they put up in the square." Patton insisted, but they did walk into a store together and look around for a moment. Patton had a difficult time shopping during Christmas. Everything was sparkly and smelled pretty and had buttons to push and sounds to make and things to do. As he went to look at one thing, he got distracted and started going towards another. Patton grabbed Logan's hand and almost pulled it back.

"I'm a little cold." He said.

"I'd say so." Patton said. His hands felt colder than the snow outside. He gently started massaging his hands, trying to move the blood back into them. Logan blushed, "It's no fun being cold, now let me try and make you warm again."

"I'm not stopping you, it's just a little odd to start rubbing my hands in the middle of a store selling candles." Logan said.

"Well, let's warm you up a little bit, then we can find you a coffee shop to get something warm for your fingers." Patton said. An employee walked up to them and asked if she could help them find anything. Patton smiled, "No thank you, we're just stopping in for a minute to stay warm. Would you by chance know where we could grab coffee or something?"

"I think the closest place would be Lucky's. It's just around the corner here." She said.

"Thank you." He grinned at her and laced his fingers through Logan's. They walked hand in hand to the coffee shop and hurried inside. They ordered their coffee and sat down together, "Better?"

"Much. Thank you. I just realized that I wasn't bothered holding your hand in public." Logan said with a smile.

"Why would you be bothered?" Patton asked.

"When I was with anyone else I would get so anxious about people thinking I was different or staring or something. And somehow you managed to quell that anxiety so much that I didn't even notice we were doing anything differently beyond thinking how warm your hand was." Logan explained. Patton's heart blossomed in a happy warmth. Patton calmed him down. Patton loved him so much, and in a way the feeling was mutual.

"You know, I tried dating again after Emily left. I was always so worried that I would say something or do something that would make them leave too. I'm not worried you'll leave me like she did." Patton told him. Logan looked like he wanted to smile but forgot how. The corners of his mouth turned up but the rest stayed neutral.

"When she comes to visit, tell me and I'll be there with you." Logan told him. Patton smiled and nodded.

"Can I ask you something?" Patton shifted forward.

"Of course."

"I was going to visit my friend who lives a few hours away. I was gonna take Virgil and roadtrip with him to visit her during New Year's. Do you wanna maybe come with me?" Patton asked, "It'll probably just be a few days and she's super nice."

"You're sure? You really want to spend that much time with me at once?" Logan seemed a little shocked at the suggestion.

"Well, yeah. I do. I want to be with you." Patton took his hand again, "It's your decision though."

"I'd love to. I just want to make sure I'm not intruding on anything." Logan said.

"No not at all. She actually brought up the idea before I did. And I was going to see if Virgil wanted to bring Roman with." Patton told him.

"Then, yeah. Let's go." Logan smiled at him.

"Awesome. Want to go see the tree now?" Patton asked. Logan nodded and they went to see the big tree.

~*~

Patton and Logan stood out on the sidewalk in front of Logan's house. It had started snowing a few minutes ago and now fat flakes were getting caught in hair, and clothes, and eyelashes, decorating everything in a dusting of pure white. The snow glittered beneath the lamppost the couple stood under.

"I'll see you soon, I guess." Logan shrugged.

"I guess so." Patton bit his lip before gently pulling Logan forward and kissing him. Logan's fingers tangled into his hair and pulled him closer. Patton's arms wrapped around his waist.

"You taste like coffee." Logan muttered against his lips.

"So do you. Now let me keep kissing you." Patton tugged on the small of his back, trying to keep their bodies flush against each other. Logan's nose was freezing whenever it brushed against Patton's face. Logan moved his hands to Patton's jacket. Each was pulling, trying to be impossibly closer to the other.

"Patton, there's kids in this neighborhood." Logan told him. Patton couldn't care less, he just wanted more of Logan.

"They've all seen Disney movies." Patton told him.

"Disney movies don't have two grown men making out in the snow like a fucking romance movie." Logan said, "So if we want to continue, we should go inside to my bedroom."

*

A few moments later that's exactly where they were. Patton helped Logan out of his shirt and pushed him gently onto the bed.

"Scale of one to ten, one is vanilla. How expirimental do you feel today?" Patton asked. He wanted to push Logan, but not to the point he broke.

"Maybe four or five." Logan told him. Patton nodded and kissed him. He pulled off his layers until he was topless, keeping the scarf in his hands.

"We're going to have another little expiriment, okay? Tell me if you don't like it." Patton said. Logan nodded. Patton pinned Logan's arms above his head and tied his wrists together with his scarf. He didn't tie him to anything, just tied him up enough that it could give him an idea. He unzipped Logan's jeans and swallowed him down. He didn't really know what he was doing, but he was good at making it up as he went along. Logan whimpered and his legs shook. He started to reach his hands down to pull his hair, Patton growled low in his throat and Logan moved his hands back up above his head.

He came down in Patton's mouth, just according to plan. This might be pushing a little bit too far and Patton normally wouldn't try to cross the line so much, but he knew Logan had already been on one end of this.

Patton crawled back up and wrapped his hand around Logan's throat as he kissed him. Logan yelped quietly when Patton let his tongue push the sticky cum into Logan's mouth. Almost immediately after the little noise of surprise, he sighed and let his eyes flutter closed. When Patton pulled away, he gently squeezed Logan's throat, forcing out a barely audible moan.

"You know, you're very quiet in bed." Patton told him. Logan squirmed beneath him, "We'll have to remedy that soon."

"Soon. But now it's Daddy's turn." Logan told him. Patton smirked and pulled him up. He retired his hands behind his back and pushed him to his knees on the floor.


	40. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, four princess dresses

There was a school dance tonight. Roman was making Virgil go, mostly because they hadn't ever gone to a dance together. Roman got all dressed up and went to pick Virgil up. Roman smiled at what he saw Virgil wearing.

"I don't like suits." Virgil said, nervously messing with the hem of his skirt. He wore the dress Patton picked out for him, and heels. Black wedges that buckled around his ankles. A bow sat on the thin straps. His choker was around his neck. 

"You're so pretty." Roman gushed. Virgil blushed and ducked his head. Patton popped up behind him and smiled.

"Hi Roman. I'd remind you to be good to him, but I know you will. Have fun." He said. He hugged Virgil goodbye and sent the pair away. Roman opened up the car door for Virgil, wanting to be a perfect gentleman.

"Do you think it'll be okay that I'm wearing a dress?" Virgil asked as they drove.

"Yeah, of course. The only one I can think of the wouldn't be totally fine with it is the Spanish teacher, he's kind of homophobic. But if he's there you can just flip him off and walk away." Roman said. Virgil giggled.

"You're advice is to flip off a teacher."

"He's an asshole. He was going around the classroom asked people if they liked different things in Spanish and he came to me and asked if I liked girls. I said no, I like boys. He just sort of sneered at me and walked away." Roman told him. Virgil giggled.

"How would you say you like boy in Spanish?" He asked.

"Mi gustan los chicos." Roman answered. Virgil smiled, "You seem happy tonight."

"I am happy. I'm still a little anxious, but I'm happy." He said.

At the dance they paid for tickets and wandered inside. The gym was decorated with paper snowflakes and too much glitter. A big banner announced the _Snow Ball_ to the crowd of students. There was a group of girls whispering to themselves and glancing in Virgil's direction.

"Why do that keep looking over here?" He asked Roman.

"Probably because you look cute." He answered. Virgil started biting his nails without noticing. Roman held his hand to stop him.

"What if they don't like that I'm wearing a dress?" Virgil asked.

"Then they're jealous because you look better than they do." Roman insisted, "It's alright. Look one of them is coming over, if you're right we can go dance in the middle of the crowd and no one will notice you."

Virgil scooted closer to Roman as the pretty blonde walked up to them. She wore a tight fitted sequined dress, her hair loosely braided over her shoulder.

"I was just telling some friends how pretty your dress was and figured I should come compliment you." She smiled. Roman smirked, "And your shoes are adorable, where'd you get them?"

Virgil looked up at Roman like a child afraid of another kid at the park. He nudged him forward to talk to her. He answered nervously and she insisted that she needed a pair.

"You look really familiar and I can't remember where I've seen you around. What grade are you in?" She asked.

"I'm a senior. I usually don't wear stuff like this to school. It's usually big baggy sweatshirts and stuff." He told her she nodded.

"Oh, you're Virgil. I don't think we've had any classes together this year. You should dress like this more often, it really works for you." She smiled.

"Thank you, I have once before actually. But I may have had some ulterior motives." He shrugged. Roman blushed as he remembered the pure torture he went through that day.

"Oh my god, right? I know the feeling." She winked, "Is this your boyfriend?"

"Yeah. He's Roman." Virgil told her. Roman smiled and waved.

"Hi. Do you have a Snapchat?" She asked. Virgil nodded, "Can I see your phone?"

Virgil handed it to her. She typed something in and handed it back.

"There you go. I'm Marcy in there. I'm gonna go back over with my girlfriends but you should message me sometime. You seem cool." She said. Virgil nodded and she walked away.

"What just happened?" He asked Roman.

"My princess just made a friend." He smiled and cheered for him. Virgil giggled.

"I made a friend." He said. To celebrate, they went to go dance together. Roman took the lead and grabbed Virgil's waist. Virgil wrapped his arms around his neck.

"With your shoes, you're almost as tall as I am." Roman told him.

"Shut up." Virgil told him.

"No I'm serious, I don't have to bend down to kiss you now. And I'm not very tall either you know." Roman said to him.

"You're like normal short, I'm weirdly short." Virgil explained to him.

"No you're not. It just means you're cuter, and you get to wear better heels without towering over everyone around you, and I can pick you up, and it's easy to snuggle with you." Roman told him. Virgil was so little that he could be adjusted into just about any position and still fit perfectly in Roman's arms, "Did you end up going to that audition?"

"Yeah, but there was a lot of people there that were better than me and actually knew what they were doing. I really don't think I'll get in." Virgil said with a shrug.

"Well, they're sending out the casting list in just a few minutes. We can find out together." Roman told him. Virgil nodded, "You know, you are really good. Even if you don't get a part, which to me is unlikely, just know that you're still full of so much talent."

"Yeah, I know." Virgil said. They danced for a few more songs before they decided to step away and check the cast list. Roman decided that first he would check the dancer list. About a dozen names were listen, none of them Virgil's. Roman saw his expression fall and gently squeezed his hand. He scrolled back up to the top of the cast list. He saw two things that immediately spiked his attention.

"Hey Virgil, you know. There's dancers that are actual characters in the show and not just extras." Roman said.

"Yeah, but I know for a fact I didn't get any of those parts." Virgil said.

"Maybe not any of the big name characters, but there is one dancer that plays a very small role." Roman turned his phone to show him.

"Who's the unconscious Argentinean?" Virgil asked.

"Oh you know, just the guy that preforms El Tango de Roxanne." Roman shrugged.

"I-wait. I get to do that? I get the most iconic part in the whole thing?" Virgil's eyes widened, his jaw dropping.

"Yep." Roman nodded.

"I did it. And you did it too! Look you get the lead part." Virgil beamed. Roman nodded and scooped him up, "Am I really that good?"

"You really are. And you'll be even better once you start training." Roman grinned at him. He love Virgil so much and he was so proud and happy that he pushed him out if his comfort zone.

"I have to call Dad." Virgil pulled out his phone and hurried to the bathroom. Roman felt like he was glowing. Not only did he get the rush of knowing he got the lead part, but he also got to know that Virgil would preform with him on stage in front of everyone. Virgil came back a few minutes later, perfectly glowing. He practically jumped into Roman's arms and buried his face in his neck. Roman set him back down on the ground and kissed him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Don't forget to leave comments and kudos. I don't want to be pushy, but that's how I know people are interested.


	41. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, five little days.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little Logan this chapter. If you're not a fan, wait till tomorrow.

Logan was sick. His head felt stuffy and full, his throat hurt, and he kept coughing up congestion the consistency of egg whites. He told Patton, who immediately rushed over with homemade soup, medicine, juice, ice cream, and a small stack of picture books.

"Let's get you feeling better." Patton told him. He fed him the soup and asked if he had taken anything yet. Logan shook his head and Patton handed him the medicine he brought. Logan poured but swallowed it down like he was told. There was that odd feeling of smallness again. He wanted Patton to pick him up and carry him around with him. He wanted to snuggle, and read stories, and color pictures, and have his Daddy tell him how good he was.

"It's yucky." Logan told him after he gulped down the medicine.

"I know sweetheart. But it'll help you feel better. Can you be a good boy and finish eating for me?" Patton asked. Logan continued spooning the soup into his mouth. Patton smiled at him and kissed the top of his head. He started to walk away, which was not what Logan wanted him to do at all. He whined and grabbed for him.

"Stay." Logan told him.

"Don't worry, I'll be gone for just a minute. I just need to go grab something, okay?" He asked. Logan nodded and let him leave. His food was hot and warmed him up, it even helped the sticky feeling in his throat go away. Patton came back with his penguin and his pacifier. Logan lit up and tried to reach for his things.

"Calm down, baby. I'll let you have your penguin now, but your paci's got to wait till your soup is all gone." Patton handed him the stuffed animal and sat down next to him. Logan squeezed him against his chest and finished eating. Patton brought his bowl to the sink after placing the pacifier in Logan's mouth. Logan followed him to the sink and nuzzle up against his side.

"Daddy, want up." Logan said. Patton turned to face him and kissed his forehead.

"I gotta rinse out your bowl first. Then I can pick you up. What do you want to do now? We've got stories, and coloring, and movies, and I brought bubble bath with me." Patton told him as he started cleaning out the bowl.

"Wanna story." Logan said. Patton picked him up.

"Alright, then let's go read a story." Patton said.

"Paci kisses." Logan insisted. Patton kissed the pacifier in his mouth and made Logan giggle and duck into his shoulder. Patton carried him to the couch and let him sit on his lap while he read. Logan was sitting sideways, laps draped over Patton's lap, head nuzzle into his neck. His penguin was held tightly as Patton opened the story book. It was about a toy rabbit made of something called velveteen that became real because his boy's love for him made him real.

"What did you think, baby?" Patton asked him.

"If I love my penguin enough will he become real? 'Cus I kinda want him to be real but he'd have to live in the freezer." Logan said. Patton smiled to himself.

"Why would he have to live in the freezer?" Patton asked.

"'Cus penguins live in the ice." Logan explained. He thought everyone knew that.

"Oh yeah, I suppose they do. Well, the fairy didn't make him real until the boy didn't need his rabbit anymore. I think your penguin will turn real once you don't need him anymore." Patton told him. Logan nodded, that would make sense to his now tiny mind.

"Daddy, thirsty." He told Patton.

"Do you want juice, or water, or milk?" Patton asked.

"Juice." He said. Patton carried him back to the kitchen and set him on the counter.

"We should really get you some more stuff for when you're little. That way you could have sippy cups and comfy pajamas to wear and more than one pacifier." Patton said. Logan nodded. He wanted all the sippy cups and pacifiers. He wanted clothes he could wear when he was small. Patton pulled out a water bottle you had to squeeze to get the liquid out of. He filled it with juice and handed it to Logan. He took out his pacifier and sucked happily at the water bottle. Patton promised he'd get lots of good Christmas presents this year. 

"Daddy, wanna play Candy Land." He said.

"Is it downstairs?" Patton asked. Logan shook his head and slid off the counter. He grabbed Patton's hand and guided him to a little cabinet. He opened it up and took out the board game. He walked back over the the living room and plopped down on the floor.

"Daddy, need help setting up." He announced. Patton came in the room with his pacifier he left on the counter. He sat down next to Logan and helped him sort out the cards, "I wanna be blue. You can be green."

"Alright." Patton said, "If we play on the coffee table, you could sit on my lap."

"That one." Logan said. He moved pieces up to the table and they started the game. Patton pulled him up and into his lap, making sure he could see the board. Logan moved his little character around, each time he drew a card with a piece of dandy on it he clapped and placed the little gingerbread man triumphantly on the matching pink square. He coughed, trying to cover up his mouth.

"Do you still feel sick?" Patton asked, voice full of concern. Logan nodded, "After this game let's give you a bath."

"Yes Daddy." Logan said. He put the pacifier back in his mouth. He won the game, successfully making it all the way to King Candy's castle with the rainbow bridge, "Could we take a bath together. I don't wanna by myself."

"I'll still be there with you. I'm not gonna just leave you." He said. Logan shrugged.

"Still want you with."

"How about we put you in by yourself and if you still want me to come in with you I will. Sound good?" Patton asked.

"I guess." Logan pouted, "Up."

Patton picked Logan up and carried him into the bathroom. He turned on the water and began to help Logan out of his clothes. Even when he felt so little, Logan was surprised that there didn't seem to be any sort of sexual undertones to the exchange. He poured in the bubble bath and helped Logan into the hot water. Patton gently combed through his hair before slipping the glasses off his face. Logan splashed around in the water and played with the foamy bubbles.

"Daddy, guess what's really cool." Logan looked up at him and saw Patton's heart melt a little bit. His pacifier was sitting on the counter, ready to be used if needed.

"What is it, baby." Patton asked him.

"Gotta guess." Logan insisted.

"Is it trains?" Patton asked.

"No. Two more tries." Logan held up his two fingers.

"Is it outer space?"

"Nope." Logan smiled and shook his head.

"I don't know. What's really cool?" Patton asked. Obviously he was not understanding the rules of the game.

"No." Logan pouted, "Gotta guess."

"Alright, I'll guess. Is it those pretty rocks that are only pretty on the inside but look like normal rocks on the outside?" Patton asked. Logan shook his head.

"Dinosaurs." Logan finally gave up the answer.

"Yeah? Can you tell me about them?" Patton asked, happily playing with Logan's hair.

"Everyone thinks they're really big, but they're kind of not. Some of them were, but not all of them. The 'lociraptors were just angry dinosaur chickens." Logan explained.

"Really? Now why would that be?" Patton questioned.

"It's acuz they're chicken sized with feathers. But their tails were really long, longer than me. But the guy in Jurassic Park was right about their claws. They would circle 'round they aminal they were gonna eat and then attack it with their big claws and kill it." Logan explained. He felt it was a very eloquent description of the velociraptor and its hunting habits.

"What else do you know about dinosaurs?" Patton asked him. Logan knew a lot about dinosaurs.

"It's not really a dinosaur, but there was a huge bear. They're all gone now, but there's only like 12 of them. The guy had one of the heads, but a fake head acuz there's only 12, and he had a people head. They were both the head bones though, he didn't have a real people head with eyes and stuff. But he put the people head inside the bear's mouth. He could bite of someone's head without even trying. And when he stands up he could look into your windows. Not even your bottom windows, your top windows." Logan gushed. He remembered the museum he went to. A ginger man sat with a cart full of molded bones and showed the children the skull of the prehistoric bear and mammoth teeth.

"Wow! I guess we should be happy that it doesn't exist anymore." Patton watched him play in the bubbly water.

"And there's a dinosaur with huge wings. The biggest wings ever. But they were so big that people don't know if it could even fly. They could've just used them to turn into little boats and float around to catch fish." Logan described. He continued telling Patton all about dinosaurs and how it was all so fascinating to him. Eventually, Logan did have to get out of the bath. Patton wrapped him up in a towel and brought him to the bedroom. He picked out some new pajamas from his drawers and helped him get dressed.

"Do you feel any better?" Patton asked. Logan shrugged.

"Little bit." He said, "Tired."

"Then let's put you down for a nap. Come on and snuggle with Daddy." Patton held out his arms and Logan snuggled up to him. Patton brought them both to the bed and made sure Logan was comfortable.

"Story?" Logan pleaded.

"I left all the stories in the kitchen, baby boy. I can read more when you wake up if you want." Patton combed through his hair with his fingers.

"Then 'magine it up." Logan told him. Patton smiled at him and started telling his made up story to help Logan fall asleep, paci in his mouth.

~*~

He woke up wondering why something was in his mouth. He reached up to pull it out, and as he looked at the pacifier he remembered what happened.

"Hi." Patton smiled down at him.

"Hi. That was a weird-"

"That was little space. I assume you're big now." Patton asked. Logan nodded.

"Yeah, I guess so. Thanks for putting up with it, even though I don't really know what it is all the way yet." Logan told him.

"Trust me, I love little space. I like taking care of people, and you are a very cute little." Patton tapped his nose.

"Really?" Logan asked.

"Yeah. You're a very demanding little though. But you cut out almost every word in a sentence so when you ask for things it's just a word or two. Up, thirsty, tired, wanna play, it's adorable." Patton said, "And you love being carried around and snuggled. I think if you had the option, you would make me carry you everywhere."

"Do you want me to be little more?" Logan asked.

"If you're up for more little, I would not protest. Probably the opposite. I'd hug you and kiss you and pick you up, and make sure you had your penguin." Patton told him. Logan rested against his chest.

"It's kind of nice in a way. Just having someone take care of you like that, it's kind of relaxing." Logan said.

"You're welcome to pop the pacifier back in your mouth and be little whenever you'd like." Patton kissed his forehead and squeezed his shoulders. Logan reached back over and stuck the pacifier back between his lips. Patton hummed quietly and pulled him a little bit closer.


	42. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, six Christmas cookies.

Roman wanted cookies, but he couldn't cook to save his life. Virgil decided to supervise him, possibly giving him easy jobs to do. His collar was tucked away in his pocket in case he ended up wanting it. He found a recipe on his phone and started pulling out ingredients with Roman's help.

"Okay, I don't trust you with flour so I'll do that." Virgil said.

"I can do the flour." Roman pouted.

"Can you measure or out and put it in the bowl without making the kitchen look like a flour bomb went off?" Virgil raised and eyebrow and Roman ducked his head.

"No." He said quietly.

"That's what I thought. You can do baking powder and baking soda." He explained how much needed to go in and tried to pay close attention to him. It was a success. Virgil released a breath and finished pouring in the flour. He handed Roman a spoon, "You can stir this together. It doesn't need a lot."

Roman nodded and stirred the ingredients together. Virgil let him do butter, sugar, and vanilla, but not the eggs. He didn't trust him with the eggs. They mixed the two parts together and rolled the dough out into little balls and put them in the oven to bake.

"It's almost like you have no faith in my cooking skills." Roman pouted in the couch.

"Maybe because you have no cooking skills. I have no idea how you manage to fuck it up so badly so I'm watching everything just in case." Virgil told him.

"I'm not that bad." Roman tried to protest.

"You lit water on fire." Virgil reminded him.

"Only once."

"That's already too many times." Virgil said, "And as cute as fanfiction is when they destroy the kitchen and cover themselves in flour, I actually would like to have cookies that taste good."

"But don't they always get cookies in the end?" Roman asked.

"No. Only like half the time. The other half they make charcoal and the person eats them anyway because they love their partner so much. Let me tell you right here and now, if you try to cook and you fuck it up, I'm not eating it because I love you okay? It's your fault and you need to handle the consequences." Virgil told him. Roman pouted.

Earlier they had gone shopping for decorations for the cookies and now they just had to wait for them to cool. Roman's arm was draped around his shoulders.

"Virgil, I need to ask a question that's been bothering me for a while?" Roman looked at him.

"What is it?" Virgil could feel his heart begin to race. What could Roman possibly want to ask him?

"Why do we say that things are on fire when really fire is on things?" He asked. Virgil blinked.

"What the fuck?" Virgil told him.

"I'm serious. Once I noticed it it's all I can think about." He said.

"I guess the answer is because English is weird and only half the things we say actually make sense." Virgil shrugged.

"What?"

"Falling asleep, falling in love, don't you dare, stuff like that." Virgil said.

"Don't you dare isn't that weird." Roman said.

"If you don't use the contraction, you say do not you dare. That's weird." Virgil explained.

"Yeah, I guess so." Roman shrugged, "Another thing, how do defibrillators work? It seems counter intuitive to shock someone when they're dying."

"I don't know, but my dad's a nurse. We could ask?" Virgil pointed out. Roman shrugged. They called Patton on speaker phone. When he picked up they asked the question.

"Oh, it's a little funny. Your heart beat wants to stay regular, because of its not you die. When it's irregular, it can't get back to normal. Defibrillators temporarily stop your heart from beating for a little bit so it'll restart itself normally again." Patton explained.

"So you kill them temporarily?" Roman asked.

"Well just for a little bit. Not long enough to hurt you at all, and you're better when you wake up. But yeah." Patton explained.

"Oh my god. You just turn people off and on again." Roman said quietly. Patton laughed on the other end of the phone.

"Yeah, if that's how you want to think about it. I gotta go kiddo. I'm at work and I need to get back to it. See you tonight." He said. Virgil said goodbye and hung up the phone.

"Any other-"

"Shush, I have half a thought and I'm trying to make it a full thought." Roman said. Virgil waited for him to share. Roman jumped up and walked to the other side of the coffee table like he was giving a presentation, "I have had an epiphany."

"Oh?" Virgil relaxed back into the couch.

"Yes. A solution to most, if not all, of life's problems." Roman announced.

"My interest has been peaked." Virgil told him.

"If it doesn't work how it's supposed to, turn it off and on again. Now you may think this can only be applied to technology, but no. Think about this for a moment. What do you tell someone when their relationship isn't doing as well as they'd like, take a break, try seeing other people then come back and see how you feel. Turn it off and on again. You're studying and information stops holding as well, take a nap and try again later. Turn it off and on again. Your heart stops beating right. Turn it off and on again." Roman explained. Virgil couldn't help but smile at how ridiculous he was, "I'm a fucking genius."

Virgil laughed and applauded, "A beautiful speech. Do you think the cookies are done?"

"Probably. Ready to go decorate them?" Roman asked. He helped Virgil up and the couple went into the kitchen. They set out their supplies and got to work. Virgil sat on the counter and decorated his cookies. He wasn't being super pretty or careful, he was mostly just trying to get some frosting on them. He watched Roman pour a lot of effort into his cookies.

"What are you making?" Virgil asked him. Roman showed him the cookies he had made.

"This one's a tree that I made rainbow. Because I'm gay. This one's a snowflake. I made a penguin." He listed off his creations. While Virgil was distracted, Roman must've dropped his finger into the frosting, "And this one," He smeared frosting across Virgil's cheeks, "Will taste the best of them all."

He grabbed Virgil's face and lapped up the frosting. Virgil giggled and chased his lips. Roman grabbed his hips and pulled him forward. Virgil wrapped his arms around his neck and kissed him.

"I love you." Roman said. Virgil nuzzled into his neck. Roman always smelled heavenly, like apples and lavender. Today the smell of sugar and vanilla mixed itself in, "I want to see you dance so badly."

"Then come dance with me." Virgil told him.

"You know I can't dance." Roman reminded him.

"If I can audition for a musical, you can come dance with me in your living room." Virgil said. He slid off the counter and took him into the living room. He turned on Christmas music And pulled Roman out into the middle of the floor with him. Roman bit his lip and waited to be told what to do. Virgil stepped up to him and grabbed his hand.

"You sure we're not too close?" Roman asked. Was he blushing.

"I'm sure. Why? Scared to dance with a pretty boy?" Virgil bat his eyelashes. Roman was definitely blushing, "Okay, teasing aside, I'm going to be Belle, you're the Beast. Remember where their arms go?"

Roman nodded and placed his arm on Virgil's hip. 

"You're so shy. Come on, it's okay to grab me." He urged and pulled Roman's hand to the small of his back. Virgil put his arm on his boyfriend's shoulder and smiled up at him. Roman's cheeks were red, "Seriously, you seem so nervous. It's just me."

"I know, but I'm a really bad dancer." He said. Virgil giggled.

"So I'll go easy on you." Virgil said, "You're going to move forward while I move back. Left foot, follow mine."

Roman's eyes were glued to the floor. He carefully followed Virgil's steps. Left, right, step out, feet together. Very slowly, Virgil started dancing more in time with the music. Roman's eyebrows were furrowed together in concentration, his lower lip jutted out.

"Roman, don't think so much. Relax and just remember, left, right, out, together." Virgil told him. He nodded. He stepped on Virgil's toes a couple times, but he didn't mind.

"How do you make it look so easy?" He asked.

"Because I only think about what I'm doing right after. Other than that I only feel, which sounds stupid and cliche, but that's what happens. Different dances have different feelings." Virgil explained.

"Can I have some examples?" Roman giggled. That was good, it meant he was loosening up.

"Waltz is the relationship between Morticia and Gomez Addams. It's mature and elegant, but still romantic. Tango is, to steal someone's words, hate sex. There's passion, and dominance, and heat."

"If you're dancing tango for Moulin Rouge, who are you hate fucking?" Roman asked, suddenly much closer to Virgil.

"Take a wild fucking guess." Virgil smirked. Roman giggled and pushed him onto the couch. He turned off the music and straddled his hips.

"Maybe we should practice a little. We don't want you to be rusty when we go back for rehearsals." Roman said, putting his hands on his chest. Virgil giggled and bit his lip.

"If you want to practice, we need to get rough." Virgil told him.

"Then forget the couch. Let's go break a bed." Roman whispered to him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know that at least some of you follow SHINee, and I know that you've probably heard everything and more about the situation. I won't go into detail here because I doubt everyone will be interested, but know that even I am devastated by what happened. In tomorrow's update I should have a link to where I discuss my thoughts and feelings about this, so keep an eye out for that.
> 
> Please, if any of you are struggling, whether you know what's going on or not, please reach out to someone. Please tell someone and they will help you. I know I handle some pretty heavy stuff in regards to depression, and I can tell you from experience that having just one person to go to can help so much. If you don't have a person and you're having a rough time, feel free to message me any time on Instagram @Spiderman1644 sadly that's the only social media I really have right now.
> 
> I'll leave it at that for now, but keep in mind that I love and appreciate every single one of you for coming and joining me for this story. Every comment makes me smile, every kudos warms my heart, even if you're just lurking in the background, I still love you all.
> 
> Be good to each other and keep your chin up. Life will go on.


	43. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me, seven morning coffees.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Mental breakdown at the beginning. After the break is completely clear.

Patton was so excited. He'd made a whole bunch of popcorn for everyone and got everyone drinks. He'd double checked to see if he had popcicles, just in case. Virgil was nestled between Roman's legs, back against his chest. Logan sat at the other end of the couch, waiting for him. When Patton finally sat down, he wrapped an arm around Logan's shoulders. They played the movie, and settled in for a long night.

First was _How the Grinch Stole Christmas_ , Virgil's favorite Christmas movie since he was a toddler. Originally, Patton wasn't sure about letting his three year old watch it, Virgil was so sensitive then, he cried because Pocahontas scared him. But when nothing else held his attention long enough, Patton decided it was worth a try. He had prepared himself for tears, but Virgil gave him giggles and smiles. Jim Carrey's radical movements and goofy improv seemed to strike a chord with Virgil, and it remained in their holiday tradition to this day.

And now it wasn't just Patton and Virgil sitting on the couch. They didn't have to share these moments alone because they had no one else. They had Logan and Roman. In just a few months their family had doubled in size. Patton thought back to a moment in Lilo and Stitch. He remembered watching it with Virgil a few months after Emily left. That one line at the end, the thing that Stitch says before he needs to leave. The thing that ripped Patton to pieces when he heard it, not that the rest of the movie didn't.

"This is my family. I found it, all on my own. It's little, and broken, but still good. Yeah. Still good."

Patton pulled Logan a little closer without thinking about it. Logan looked up at him, he looked concerned. He signed something to Patton, he'd taught him a few signs here and there so they could talk to themselves in moments like this. He brought his hand to his chin and brought it downwards to his other hand, his eyebrows furrowed up in concern. Logan had signed the word _good_ , but a question. He wanted to know if Patton was okay. He smiled and nodded. Logan cuddled closer to him. 

An hour into the movie and Patton was spiraling. It had never been this bad before. All he could think about was the feeling of abandonment that he'd suffered through, the feeling that he couldn't do it, so many thoughts. Down, and down, and down for what felt like forever. After the movie ended, Logan suggested an intermission. Get up, move around, if you need something do it now. He pushed Patton into the bathroom and locked the door. There were more so if someone needed, there wouldn't be an issue.

"You're not doing good, are you?" Logan asked.

"I'm fine." Patton smiled. He was lying.

"No, you're not. You need help." Logan told him.

"I promise, I'm okay." Patton tried to convince him. 

"Stop lying to me. Tell me what's going on. Obviously it's bad." Logan said, crossing his arms.

"What are you talking about?" This time Patton was genuinely confused. How did Logan know that this was worse?

"All the other times you've been upset, you've told me everything and more. You're always so open with me about what you're feeling, and this is bad enough that you won't even tell me somethings wrong. That means it scares you and you've chosen flight over fight. Whatever it is that's bothering you, tell me, I want to help." Logan explained. Patton's heart sank. He felt his expression fall.

"I messed it all up. I should've waited. I should've thought about what I was doing. I should've known that it would go wrong. She didn't deserve to stay with me. I'm so clingy, and emotional, and I get in everyone's way. I can feel life getting better and the higher the peak the worse the fall. I'm terrified of this fall. I'll lose everything. You'll leave me, I'll bury my kid, I'll be alone again, I don't want to be alone." Patton couldn't see through the tear threatening to pour from his eyes. He scratched at his forearm, something to expel his surplus emotion. Logan took his hands as big fat welts started to appear, Patton tried to pull away. He needed to do something, anything to get out of his own mind. Logan's grip tightened.

"Patton, look at me. You're alright. I won't leave you like she did. We're going to keep Virgil alive for a long time. We're here to help cushion your fall. You're not alone, I promise. I'm here, Virgil's here, your sister in South Dakota will be here as soon as you give the word, Emma would do the same." Logan explained to him, talking slowly. Patton relaxed a little, but his brain still spiraled, "I'm going to let go of your hands. Don't scratch, okay?"

"Okay." Patton said. Logan let go of his hands and pulled out his phone. Patton focused all his energy on keeping his twitching fingers away from his arms. Logan handed him his phone. A coloring app was open. Patton looked up at him.

"Don't think, just pick pretty colors and make it look nice." Logan said. Patton nodded and did as he was told. He filled in the little shapes with color, trying to calm down enough to just pick a color. It wasn't helping. It wasn't breaking the thought spiral, just forcing him to pause. He told that to Logan. He handed his phone back and scratched at his forearm. His skin was red and raw, but it was helping, "Patton, you need to stop scratching."

"But I need to." He explained. Logan bit his lip.

"Does Virgil have OCD?" Logan asked. Patton nodded, "Do you know his compulsions?"

"He counts the stairs, he walks behind whoever is pushing a shopping cart, he checks the doors three times every night to make sure they're locked. Other than that, it depends." Patton explained. He counted stairs in case the power went out and he needed to know the steps. He walked behind shopping carts in case someone turned and ran him over. He checked the doors for locks, not because of robbers or animals or anything like that, but because of a scary story someone told him when he was little. A man who called himself the vampire because he would wander through neighborhoods at night and try to open all the doors. If it was locked he was uninvited, if unlocked he was invited and he'd kill whoever was inside.

"Alright." Logan started mumbling to himself and pulled something out of his pocket, "Try this."

He handed Patton a little plush stack of pancakes. His was rubbery on the outside, but it felt like memory foam on the inside. He just squished it. It was just hard enough to take a bit of effort. His arm burned, but this was a decent replacement. He felt his body relax, his mind focused just on the smooth feeling and the soft squishing of the toy.

"I like this." Patton said. His breathing was evening out. His mind went quiet. He was alright, he felt better.

"That's helping?" Logan asked. Patton nodded. Logan sighed, "Good. Keep doing that until you're feeling better."

Patton rested his forehead on Logan's shoulder. This was good. He wiped his eyes. A few more minutes and he could leave the bathroom.

They started up the next movie. Patton kept the little stack of pancakes in his hand the entire time. He wasn't sure how something so small could ward off something so massive. Logan made sure to play something lighthearted this time around. Charlie Brown Christmas. Patton felt a lot better. He felt like he could actually enjoy himself. He still had to consciously keep track of his breaths, but this was easier than before. The movie ended and Logan recommended another intermission. Again, he took Patton to a room alone.

"How do you feel?" Logan asked. He grabbed Patton's arm gently.

"Better." He said with a nod.

"Can you tell me what you're thinking about? Hold the pancake." Logan questioned.

"I messed up. I made a lot of mistakes. I should've thoughts things out better." Patton said. Logan nodded.

"Is there anything else?" Logan asked. Patton shook is head, "How long has this been in your head?"

"I guess a few days." Patton shrugged. It just hadn't ever been this loud before. It was like someone was cranking up the volume until his took rattled and he could feel the bass in his chest.

"Does Virgil have a psychiatrist or a therapist or something?" Logan still hadn't let go of Patton's hurt arm.

"Yeah, he does."

"Do they take adults?"

"Yeah." Patton told him. He wasn't quite following where Logan was going.

"I want you to call them and make an appointment. Something isn't right on your head. I have some theories, but I won't tell you what they are because I'm a high school science teacher and not anyone that can diagnose you. I want you to tell them everything you told me and more if there is any." Logan told him. Patton nodded, "Promise me."

"I promise I'll make an appointment."

"Thank you."

~*~

Logan had stayed the night. Patton knew it was only partially because it was late. It was late when they finally decided to go to bed. Both Logan and Patton were so tired they just changed clothes and collapsed in a heap on Patton's bed. In the morning, Patton intended to make breakfast. But yesterday exhausted him, and he knew Virgil was a big boy that could figure something out. Patton stayed in bed just a little longer, Logan curled up against him. He loved him so much. When Logan finally opened his eyes, Patton kissed his forehead.

"How'd you sleep?" He asked.

"Not enough. I had weird dreams." Logan said, voice still mostly asleep, "I was hungry, but I didn't want to cook, so I ordered food. But instead of ordering something normal like pizza or Chinese food or whatever, I hired a fucking Japanese chef to come to my house and make me breakfast sushi. It was like scrambled eggs instead of rice and bacon instead of sushi and it was so good. But then he handed me the bill and I got mad because this stupid breakfast sushi was $700, and that seemed really unreasonable. But of course the sushi was $700, I hired a five star fucking chef to make it for me."

"Sounds like you had a night." Patton smiled as he gently stroked Logan's hair.

"Oh, fuck. You had the fucking-whatever. How you feeling?" Logan slurred as he rolled over to be mostly on top of Patton. His head on his chest.

"I'm getting better. Sleep helped." Patton said. Logan groaned.

"I'm gonna have to get up eventually." Logan muttered to himself.

"You can stay here." He said. Logan hummed and buried his nose into Patton's shirt.

"I have a question about pants." He announced.

"Well, hopefully I can answer it." Patton tried to fix his hair from the wild mess that sleep had turned it into.

"You don't wear pants to bed, just underwear." Logan pointed out. Patton nodded, "So if underwear is just what you wear under stuff, and you don't have anything under your thing. Are you really wearing underwear and not the pants with no underwear?"

"I don't know." Patton shrugged. He was beginning to like sleepy Logan. How did he ever get up at all?

"That's dumb. I need caffeine." Logan insisted.

"We have coffee downstairs." Patton told him.

"But moving is hard." Logan whined. A few seconds later and he snorted quietly on Patton's chest. He sent a text to Virgil.

_Normally I'd try to show as little affection towards Logan as possible around bc it's awkward, but he needs coffee and he sort of fell asleep on me. Dog rules also apply to boyfriends_

**How do you know he needs coffee if he's asleep?**

_Because he woke up, told me a dream he had about breakfast sushi, demented coffee, then rolled over and now he's asleep on me._

**I'll be up in a minute.**

Patton turned his phone off and tried to adjust their position. He sat up in bed and tried to pull Logan into a more comfortable position. He just tightened his grip on Patton's middle and nuzzled against his belly. Patton sighed and let him stay there. He lost track of time, but Virgil did come upstairs with two mugs of coffee. One black, one filled with so much cream and sugar it was barely coffee.

"Thank you so much. It's illegal for me to move until he wakes up." Patton told him. Virgil giggled.

"He actually fell asleep on you. You weren't joking." Virgil said.

"Why would I lie about that? Logan, wake up. We got you coffee." Patton tried waking him up. He only succeeded in making Logan whine and hold him tighter.

"He's not moving. I'll leave you to get him awake." Virgil smiled and left the room. Patton said a quick goodbye and returned to his mission. He poked and prodded, Logan finally cracked his eyes back open. He reached a hand out for the coffee.

"Logan, you can't drink coffee laying down. Especially when you're laying face down on me." Patton reminded him.

"Fuck you." Logan flipped him off. Patton pulled him up so he could sit up and drink coffee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What I have to say about Jonghyun


	44. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the eighth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, eight new decorations.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short this time around

Roman had a sort of weird holiday tradition. He would make ornaments with his family. This year he invited Virgil. Rose had spread out paint, and glitter, and glue, and brushes, and set a small box of plain colored ornaments on the table. Virgil and Roman both reached for the white ornaments. Roman grabbed paint and started painting a little snowman face on his. Virgil took a very different approach, and a much more dramatic one. Roman watched him cover the entire ornament in white glitter.

"What are you doing?" Roman asked him.

"I saw a white ball and I know what needs to be done." Virgil told him. He painted a green ring at the front of the ornament and covered it in glitter. He filled in a black circle in the middle of the ring, again glitter.

"Did you just make a fucking eyeball ornament, you goddam edgelord?" Roman asked him.

"Yes I did." He added some sparkly veins to the eye and proclaimed it finished, "Look it's even red and green. Perfect for Christmas."

"You have a fundamental misunderstanding of what Christmas is." Roman said.

"Maybe so. But I will forever continue until I get my Nightmare Before Christmas." Virgil told him. Roman sighed.

"You're covered in glitter." Roman told him.

"I'm gay. I bleed glitter." Virgil explained. His clothes, his hands, some got in his hair. He looked so weirdly out of place. His black clothes and eyeliner, and glitter everywhere. Roman giggled and continued decorating. Rose walked back in the room and sat at the table with them.

"How are you boys doing?" She asked, "Roman, your dad is down at a meeting and I'm bored. Is it okay if I come hang out with you for a few minutes? Feel free to kick me out."

"Virgil, up to you." Roman turned to him.

"I don't care." He shrugged. Rose cheered and settled in.

"I feel like I barely know you Virgil. What do you and your dad do for Christmas?" She asked.

"I don't know, my dad makes these cookies. They're like a sandwich cookie, so you have two halves with frosting in the middle. It's like cherry cookies and almond frosting and they're so good. He makes cinnamon rolls every Christmas morning." Virgil said with a shrug, "My dad likes cooking."

"That's so amazing of him. Maybe if we send Roman over there enough some of that will rub off on him." Rose teased. Virgil snorted and Roman pouted, "You guys are such polar opposites, how did you manage?"

"That's a really good question." Virgil said, "But I have no intentions of breaking up with him anytime soon, so we're doing something right."

"I guess so. Are you into musicals as much as Roman is?" She asked. Virgil shook his head.

"I know them alright, mostly because of Roman. But I'm not as into them as he is. There is one that I really like called Avenue Q, it's like Sesame Street but for adults. I love it." Virgil said.

"I don't think I've heard of it?" Rose said.

"Not many people have. It's kind of white trash satire, but still really well done. It features such songs as _If You Were Gay_ , _Everyone's a Little Bit Racist_ , _It Sucks to be Me_ , and _The Internet is for Porn_. It's great." Virgil said. Roman started singing the one song he knew.

"If you were gay, that'd be okay. I mean 'cuz hey, I'd like you anyway. Because you see, if it were me, I would feel free to say that I was gay, but I'm not gay." He sang.

"Roman, you've been gay since you were conceived. I knew you were gay while I was pregnant with you." She told him.

"You did?" Roman asked. He'd never heard this story before.

"Yeah, you gave me gay sex dreams while I was pregnant." Rose said.

"What? I didn't know that." Roman had to stop what he was doing.

"Yeah, I kept having gay dreams so I just assumed you'd be gay. And now you're inviting your boyfriend over for Christmas, so I guess I was right. I mean unless you're bi or something. I don't know we never really talked about it." She shrugged.

"You never talked about it? How did you come out then?" Virgil asked.

"I didn't. I didn't feel like I needed to. The closest I had was just sort of showing up and saying 'hey mom and dad, this is my boyfriend Virgil' that's it." He said. Virgil's jaw dropped.

"My dad bought me Barbies as a kid and I was still panicking about telling him." He said.

"I know. But you're also a beautiful princess full to the brim with anxiety and I love you lots." Roman said with a smile.

"That's a good point." He said. Roman kissed his cheek. Rose smiled at the pair.

"How's your head, Roman. I know it was bothering you recently." She asked. Roman knew what she meant. She was asking about the headaches and his eyes. 

"I'm doing good. Nothing yet, I think I can last a couple more weeks without an issue." Roman shrugged.

"Oh yeah. You have the thing. I forgot about that. What's that feel like?" Virgil asked.

"You know Megamind's head?" Roman asked. Virgil nodded, "Like that, but I can't see."

"You're vision goes fuzzy, or does it just entirely black out?" Virgil asked.

"The pressure in my skull squeezes my optic nerve so no light can get to me brain. It's just a total blackout." Roman explained.

"Really? What happens if that happens on stage?"

"I can usually feel my head hurting before I go blind, so I either try not to move very much and go by audio cues. And if I can't I'll usually let someone I'll be on stage with know so they can help me out." Roman shrugged.

"I'm constantly baffled by you." Virgil said. Roman had a hand under the table and felt Virgil hand something to him and squeeze. Long and velvet, a little round something attached to it. He looked over at Virgil who begged him for something with his eyes. Oh. Roman knew what was going on.

"I'll be right back." He said. As he stood up, he kissed the top of Virgil's head. He went and got two cups down. He filled one with ice water, and one with orange juice. He sat back down and handed the orange juice to Virgil.

"Oh, thank you." He said. He sounded surprised.

"Need anything else?" Roman asked. Virgil shook his head. They talked with Rose a little longer before she left. Roman leaned over and gave him a quick peck on the lips, "Collar, right? I didn't get that wrong?"

"Yeah, collar." Virgil said, "I didn't know what to do with your mom sitting in front of me."

"You did good, kitten. I love you so much. Come here." He gently pulled Virgil over onto his lap, "Drink up."

He handed Virgil his orange juice and nuzzled into his back as he drank it. Virgil set down his cup and grabbed the ribbon and scissors. Roman took it from him, knowing how awful it was for Virgil to use scissors. He cut a few pieces for him and let Virgil tie it to his ornaments. Roman left careful kisses across the back of his neck. Rose walked back in the room.

"I guess you two are done here. Go watch a movie or something and I'll clean up." She said with a smile as she shooed them away. They walked into the living room and sat on the couch. Roman plopped himself down and held out his arms for Virgil. Virgil sat sideways on his lap and let his legs fall over top of them. He rested his head on Roman's shoulder and snuggked in. Roman wrapped his arms around his waist and started looking for a movie.

"Want to watch Nightmare Before Christmas?" Roman asked. Virgil nodded. He turned it on and sat back, just enjoying Virgil on his lap. He gently combed through his hair, now fading to a beautiful shade of pale purple.


	45. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, nine sleepy snuggles.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's a bit of talk about mental health at the beginning if you're sensitive.

Patton stood in the doorway with two boxes. Logan raised an eyebrow at him.

"What did you buy?" He asked. Patton walked inside. And showed him the two gingerbread houses he'd brought.

"I got excited." He whispered. Logan sighed, "Come on, I want to do it with you."

"Of course you do. We can decorate them up here on the counter. I'll get bowls for candy." Logan told him.

"Oh, I also bought more candy to use." He held up a plastic grocery bag full of candy.

"I thought I was supposed to be the child in this relationship, but apparently not." Logan told him. Patton laughed.

"You're still always my little baby." Patton pat his head and sat down on one of the chairs. Logan set out a bunch of little bowls for the various candies and helped Patton sort them out. He sat down and started putting candy on his little house.

"Did you make an appointment yet?" Logan asked. Patton nodded.

"I actually went earlier today. Something about mental illness being genetic and I'm Virgil's dad or something. I don't know, I just know they got me in early." Patton said with a shrug.

"How'd it go?" Logan asked.

"Pretty well actually. We started talking about the thought spirals and stuff and that sort of lead to a conversation about Emily and then I realized I have a lot left to unpackage and a lot of feelings I didn't know I had." He explained as he squeezed frosting out of the bag in a messy, swirly design on the roof of his gingerbread house.

"Did you come up with any conclusions?" Logan asked.

"She has some theories. She said she's pretty sure but she wants to poke a little more before she says anything official." He said.

"What does she think so far?" Logan wanted to know so he could help him out. He knew how to handle a lot, as long as he knew what it was.

"She said she thinks it's OCD and something called smiling depression." Patton stated, "She said the OCD was the scratching stuff. The smiling depression she explained as sort of you're depressed but your brain just kinda ignores it, whether you realize it or not."

"I guess that's three of us now. Virgil, me, and now you've joined." He said with a little smile.

"You have depression?" Patton asked. Logan nodded.

"Diagnosed with chronic depression when I was 15 and I've been on antidepressants since I was 19." Logan told him, "I really should've gotten on them earlier."

"So that's why you're so good with the mental health." Patton pointed out.

"That, and I know how most of the disorders work." Logan shrugged. He placed little round candies in a line on top of the roof.

"I know how the stuff Virgil has works because the doctors explained it to me. Depression and anxiety both come from your brain not making enough of the thing, phobias are because your brain doesn't know it's not in trouble, and I still don't really know how the eating thing worked." Patton said.

"Eating thing?" Logan asked.

"Oh, uhm, Virgil had issues with eating a while back. He kept fainting, so I took him into a doctor. His blood sugar, his weight, his everything was so screwed up. He ended up in the hospital trying to recover for three days. We're trying to get the weight back on him, but it's going kind of slowly." Patton said.

"Give him a lot of peanuts and avacado. They're high in calories so you don't have do eat very much to get the same amount of calories you would eating a lot of other foods. Lots of fatty protein too." Logan suggested.

"He doesn't like avacado, but I'll give him more peanuts and see if it helps." Patton nodded. His house was coated in a messy layer of thick, white frosting and covered in random candies stick to it. Logan's was neat and precise, like the designs on the box. 

A little part of him wanted to just climb into Patton's lap and be held. He wanted Patton to wrap his arms around his waist and rock him back and forth. He tried to just focus on his house.

"Logan, are you done yet?" He asked. A big smiley face had been drawn on with side of the roof with frosting.

"Almost." Logan promised.

"Hurry up. Therapy is exhausting and I just want to snuggle and maybe take a nap." Patton told him. Logan placed the last few candies in his house and held his arms out for Patton. He wanted to be hdso badly. Patton stood up with a smile and picked him up.

"Hi." Logan smiled at him.

"Hi." Patton kissed his nose. Logan responded by kissing his lips. Patton carried them to the bed and crawled up next to Logan. He wrapped his arms around his waist and snuggled up to him. Logan ran his fingers through his hair. 

"Can you tell me a story?" Patton asked. 

"I'm not a very good storyteller." Logan told him. Patton looked over at his nightstand and picked up the massive book that was _Les Miserables_ , "That's in French you know."

"I don't mind. I like hearing the different languages you can speak." Patton said. 

"You're sure?" Logan told him. Patton nodded. 

"I mostly just want to hear you talk. I don't really care if I understand or not." He said. He looked up at him and Logan's heart melted a little. He opened up the book and started reading. Patton would point out every word that he knew, which wasn't many, but Logan thought it was cute that he got excited. It was a very depressing book, but Patton remained completely oblivious and made it more bearable to read. Logan kissed the top of his head if there was a break during reading. He read for about half an hour before hearing Patton's breathing change. He looked down at him, completely relaxed, eyes closed. He'd fallen asleep. Logan smiled to himself and slipped off Patton's glasses. He set them down on the coffee table and continued reading to himself. Probably not the greatest idea, he'd get stuck in French and have to be reminded to speak in English again. Oh well, he liked the book. 

A while later, Logan wriggled out of Patton's sleepy grip to get something to drink. He was just starting to pour his juice into a cup when he heard Patton's groggy voice saying hi. He looked up at him and his bedhead. It stuck up in a million different directions, he rubbed his eyes under his glasses, he was so cute when he woke up. 

"Logan, are you okay?" Patton asked. 

"Fine. Why do you ask?" He squeaked out. 

"Because you're spilling juice everywhere." Patton told him. Logan looked down and sure enough, juice had overflowed his cup and was now flooding the counter. He swore and grabbed a towel to clean it up. Patton sat down on one of the stools. Once Logan finished cleaning up, he went around to see Patton. Patton hugged him tightly and buried his face in his chest. 

"Therapy wore you out, didn't it?" Logan asked. Patton nodded. 

"I love you, Logan."

"I love you too."


	46. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me, ten kitten collars.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some kitten gear buying during this chapter. If you're not a fan, skip this chapter.

Virgil had worn his choker today. And Roman had taken notice. He had dragged him out to some city party or something. It was geared mainly towards kids, but plenty of young adults and teenagers were walking around too. There was a line to meet Santa, a few craft tables, some Christmas games, Christmas treats. All of it was gaudy and bad quality. It looked like they had Blue Clue's style jumped into an ugly Christmas sweater and couldn't escape anymore. Roman held his hand the entire time, through every activity they did together. He made sure to never leave for more than a few seconds at a time. He was a perfect gentleman, trying his hardest to pamper Virgil while they were outdoors in a public place and remembering that public affection made Virgil uncomfortable.

"How's my kitten doing?" Roman asked.

"I want to go home and watch movies with you." Virgil said, nuzzling lightly against his arm.

"I know, princess, can we just stay a little longer? I'll let you pick what we do next." He promised, wrapping his arms around his shoulders.

"I don't know. I guess we could go look at the shops." He shrugged. Roman smiled.

"Then let's go." He said. He pulled him over to the little stands with different items on display. Most of the shops were run by white 20 something girls in beige cable sweaters and their hair braided over their shoulders. They sold ornaments from their etsy page or mason jar crafts they found on Pinterest. Most of those Virgil skipped over. There was one stand that nearly everyone was passing by, a young black girl sat behind the counter. Her pastel pink hair was most likely a wig, but it suited her really well. She wore a big black bow in her hair and her black lipstick looked amazing contrasted with the pink rhinestones under the center of her eyes. Virgil pulled him towards her so he could see. When he got closer he could see her black choker with the pretty silver crescent moon hanging from the center. She perked up when she saw them stop by.

"All the jewelry is half off with the purchase of a choker." She advertised. Roman slipped behind Virgil and hugged his waist.

"Pick out whatever you'd like, my love." Roman told him. Virgil was immediately drawn to the lines of chokers laid out on the table. Most were velvet, some were ribbon, some were actual collars that came with a small plastic back containing a length of ribbon, a small padlock, and a key. The collars were still advertised as chokers, but it was pretty obvious to anyone who'd seen a pet play collar that these were not chokers. Virgil picked up a black one. Pastel pink spikes lined the entire thing and a matching bow was placed in the center. A metal ring hung underneath it white a little pink ball hanging from that. The bag had a shiny black ribbon inside and a pink, heart-shaped lock.

"I like this one a lot." He said, holding it up for Roman to see.

"That's a legitimate collar isn't it? You could finally graduate from chokers." Roman said. Virgil nodded.

"You're a kitten?" The woman running the booth asked. Virgil blushed and nodded, "You're in headspace aren't you."

"A little." He said. He wasn't used to people talking to him so openly like this.

"All the collars are BDSM proof and I sell matching leashes too if you're interested. Granted, I have found that they're more popular with puppies than kittens. I'm assuming since you don't have a collar yet you're pretty new to this." She was talking more to Roman.

"A bit, but we're figuring it out. Do you need a leash, kitten?" Roman asked. Virgil shrugged.

"I don't know. Do I?" He blinked up at Roman. He didn't want to make desicions, he wanted to be taken care of instead.

"Let's get the leash and if you don't like it we won't use it." Roman said. Virgil nodded, "Perfect. Anything else you like?"

Virgil looked over the other things she sold. Earrings, phone cases, other necklaces, bracelets, rings.

"We have cuffs too." She said. Virgil's eyes went wide. His mind suddenly began racing with all the possible ideas cuffs could include.

"Oh, you like that idea a lot. We'll get those too. Is that all, kitten?" Roman asked. Virgil nodded, "Alright then."

"I'll assume you want the matching ones?" She asked. Virgil nodded and she put everything into a plastic bag. Roman paid her and she put a business card in the bag, "I have a whole online shop if you're interested. I have ears, tails, collar sets, and a bunch of other stuff."

"We'll have to go look at it." Roman said.

"You two are adorable, by the way." She said. Roman smiled, "It's cute how affectionate you are."

"It's rare he let's me be so touchy with him, so whenever he's okay with it I need to let out all of my pent up pampering at once." Roman explained.

"Well, you two have a good night. Don't let your kitten get too cold and give him a lot of snuggles when you get home." She told them.

"And the same to you, miss." Roman took the bag from her and walked away with a smile, "Look at that, kitten. We'll have to play with your new toys soon won't we?"

Virgil blushed and nodded. He didn't feel like talking right now. He would if he had to, but really he just wanted to stay quiet. They walked around a bit longer, looking at different shops. Roman bought Virgil a new pair of earrings. One earring was a small silver cross that hung down a chain, which continued up into a little silver cuff. The other was just a little diamond stud earring.

"I feel bad that you keep buying me things." Virgil said as they walked.

"Don't, I love buying things for you." Roman told him, "It's how I take care of you."

"I know, but still." He said. Roman pulled him closer.

"Don't worry about it. Okay, little kitten?" Roman said. Virgil nodded. They walked under an archway and a bell started ringing. Virgil looked up and saw the miseltoe the pair had found themselves under. He covered his face with his hands and blushed. The crowd started cheering them on, urging them to kiss. Roman pulled his hands away and wrapped his arms around his waist. He kissed him happily. Everyone cheered for them and they pulled apart. Virgil heard two little boys nearby start talking.

"I didn't know boys could kiss too." One exclaimed.

"Well that's because all the kissing movies are for girls and girls don't want to see boys kiss." The other explained.

"Oh. Does that mean boys can like other boys?" The first asked.

"I don't know. Probably."

"Okay, because I kind of really like you." Virgil heard the first say.

"Do you want to kiss?" The second one asked. Virgil looked over his shoulder to see what happened. The boy nodded. The pair both leaned forward and pecked each other on the lips before leaping back, both blushing bright red. Virgil couldn't stop the smile from spreading across his face as he watched them reach for each other's hands.

"What's up?" Roman asked. Virgil repeated the entire exchange he'd overheard.

"That's absolutely precious. I want our kids to kiss all the boys and girls they want." Roman said.

"Our kids?" Virgil asked.

"Well, that is if we decide to have kids. I want kids and a big huge wedding with flowers everywhere, and a seven tiered cake we paid way too much for, and 200 guests." Roman said, "Of course that seems too extravagant for you."

"A bit. Honestly, my ideal wedding, if I even had a wedding at all, it would just be a Ron Swanson type wedding. Just kind of going and getting a marriage license and calling it good." Virgil shrugged. He never really wanted a wedding, it seemed flashy and without any real substance.

"How about we have a courthouse wedding but we throw a party for it afterwards where we do all the wedding things I want to do. Does that work?" Roman suggested. Virgil thought it over. It wasn't big or flashy, but it would be enough for Roman to be happy with it.

"That could work." Virgil nodded.

"Perfect. So kids. We never really talked about it ever, but do you want kids at all?" Roman asked him.

"I don't think I'd trust myself to take care of a kid." He said.

"You can actually cook a meal, and listen to issues without trying to fix them automatically, and you know how important mental health is. Everything I'm not good at, you are. We'd be the perfect balance. And we never said we had to adopt a baby. We could adopt a four year old, or a nine year old, or a thirteen year old." Roman said as they walked.

"I guess. I think kids we'll have to wait on an answer for." Virgil told him. Roman nodded. They went home soon after.

Roman drove Virgil home and handed him the plastic back.

"Dad won't be home for another few hours if you wanted to come in." Virgil bit his lip, "We could try out the new stuff I got."

"I think I could stay for a little while." Roman said with a shrug. Virgil smiled and they walked inside.


	47. Patton

The pair had opened all their gifts this morning. Patton had gotten Virgil a lot of new clothes and jewelry, because he wanted Virgil to have everything he wanted. Now Patton was making cinnamon rolls. They'd been making cinnamon rolls every Christmas morning since Virgil's first Christmas. 

That year he remembered giving very little and receiving a lot. He had just started college. He was living with his girlfriend, who became his fiancée, who became a bad memory. He was just trying to get by at that point, and Christmas was a blessing in more ways than one. It was a break from classes and work, just a time to be with his family. It was a time of giving and everyone in the world seemed to recognize their struggles and give their help. And the gifts made living a lot easier. A healthy combination of useful and pleasurable, Christmas was probably the only way he survived the year.

The next year was harder. Patton was on his own. He tried to give Virgil the world, but he just couldn't. That year there just wasn't enough. Not enough money, not enough energy, not enough positivity, not enough of anything that made Christmas what his was. He remembered Virgil's little voice when Patton asked him what he wanted for breakfast that day.

"Cimonen rolls like Mommy liked." Virgil told him. He was just over a year and half at that point. He still couldn't quite make his mouth say the right words. But Patton smiled and agreed. He let Virgil pour the ingredients into the bowl after Patton had measured them out.

The year after that was easier. Patton was recovering. He had been getting happier, his grades were good, his professors gave him a few extra days near the holidays once they found out he had a kid to take care of. One of them said he was only allowed to take time off if she got the meet little Virgil. She wanted to make sure he was being a good boy this year for Christmas. So during one of his off periods he carried Virgil into her room so she could ask what he wanted from Santa. He'd been shy even as a child, so he just clung to Patton and shrugged. He tried to assure him it was okay and she was really nice, but he still just buried his chubby little face into Patton's jacket.

"Do you want to tell her about Pooh Bear?" Patton asked, "Tell her about your favorite part."

"Pooh Bear went to see Rabbit for lunch and ate all Rabbit's honey. But then he got stuck in the door 'cuz he was too fat and Eeyore, and Piglet, and Gopher, and Kanga, and Roo, and Christopher Robin all had to come and pull him out. And then they pulled him out and he flew all the way to the other page and landed in a honey tree." Virgil explained shyly.

"Do you like Winnie the Pooh?" She asked him. Virgil nodded, "Do you have a favorite?"

"I like Eeyore." He told her.

"Eeyore's pretty cool. I like Tigger best." She said. Virgil had stopped talking to her at all, instead deciding to hide against Patton's side.

"He doesn't really like other people much." Patton said. His professor smiled.

"I can see that. You're doing well with him?" She asked.

"I'm trying. I'm hoping I'm doing something right." Patton said, "You know, I'm 20 and I'm raising a two year old on my own so I'm doing the best I can."

"If you ever need to take a day off to be with him or anything, let me know. We can work something out." She promised. He thanked her and Virgil waved his pudgy little hand goodbye.

The years had gotten progressively easier since then. But one thing that always stayed the same was cinnamon rolls for Christmas breakfast. Patton had always been curious if Virgil remembered those rougher years. The years where he only got one gift from Santa and one from his dad. The years that Santa had brought presents to Grandma's house instead and had different handwriting than normal. Trying to balance school, a kid, and a job was a tough thing to do. He remembered one year, at the beginning of the semester, Patton showed up ten minutes before class ended. After an eight minute lecture about the importance of punctuality and how rude it is to be so late for something so important as college courses, the professor asked where Patton had been in the first place.

"I was taking my kid to his first day of kindergarten." Patton said. The professor just blushed and sat back down. They got out of class two minutes early that day. He told Virgil that story now as they waited for the oven to go off.

"You sat through an entire lecture about how irresponsible you were being and he just fucking stopped after you said why." Virgil said. Patton nodded.

"And a few days later he apologized and said hed give me extra work time in class." He said. Virgil giggled.

"That's incredible. Can I ask how you figured out you were pan?" Virgil asked, "I'm really curious about how you went about that."

"Oh, Logan sat me down one day with a whole bunch of markers and told me about a bunch of different ones. He used the markers to sorta show me visually how sexuality sort of worked. You're proof enough that I'm not gay and Logan's proof enough that I'm not straight either, so I had to be somewhere in the middle. I didn't like bisexual all that much, it didn't really fit with me. He told me that pansexual people like everyone not just one or two different things." Patton said. He had so much love to give, it had to be shared with everyone. "How'd you know you were gay?"

"I just wasn't interested in girls. All my friends were talking about the crushes they had on the girl they sat next to in Algebra or whatever and I was gawking at Zuko from Avatar. I've known I've liked boys since I was 13, I just didn't act on it. It was a dirty secret until I decided to go to the LGBT night. Roman was flirting up a storm and I thought, why not try it out and see if I like it. Obviously I did." Virgil explained.

"You could've told me. I wouldn't have cared, even now I don't care. Do whatever makes you happy." Patton said.

"I know. I know you wouldn't have cared. I know you wouldn't have bat an eye, but I was just so paranoid that something would happen. I even told Logan that I knew you would be more than okay with it but I just couldnt do it myself. I think I've made a lot of progress since then. I have dresses and skirts upstairs, I wore heels to the school dance, I auditioned for a musical, I learned that apparently I'm an amazing dancer." Virgil said. He was smiling.

"You're an amazing kid. You have so much talent and passion for things you love, it's incredible." Patton said. Virgil grinned.

"Is it weird that Christmas is the only day when I don't really feel anxious or depressed or anything? It's still there, for sure, but it's not so intense. I mostly just feel happy and at home." Virgil said.

"Then I wish I could make every day Christmas for you." Patton told him.

They ate cinnamon rolls together and smiled and laughed. Wrapping paper was still covering the floor, but it was alright. It was a time to appreciate what they had now and remember how far they've come before they determine where to go from here. This was when you reflect on the past before New Year's pushed you into the future.

Before, they struggled. They were alone together. They were only just trying to get to tomorrow. One thing, then another, then another, until those baby steps made progress. Now, they were content. They looked back on those baby steps and took the time to feel pride at their progress. They could feel good that they'd made all those baby steps add up. And in the future, they would make more baby steps. They would understand the struggles they had and work to make them better. They could look forward and try to show themselves that progress could still be made, even after all this time.


	48. Roman

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas Day Part 1

Roman sat and talked with his Nana, waiting for Virgil to show up. She demanded all the information about him. What was he like? What were his parents like? What did he like to do? What did they do together? How'd they meet? How long ago? Roman was slowly becoming more and more exhausted. Finally, the doorbell rang, ending his misery. He answered the door and scooped Virgil up in a hug. He was dressed in a weird halfway between his girl clothes and his boy clothes. He had on a pair of ripped up, high-waisted, black jeans and a leather jacket, but underneath he wore his "Normal people scare me" crop top. He smiled and waved at Nana sitting on the couch. She waved back to him.

"You didn't tell me he was a goth." She smacked Roman's arm when he came over to introduce them. He pouted and rubbed his arm, Virgil giggled. He had on eyeliner today.

"Well, it didn't seem important to bring up." He defended.

"I expect a skinny guy to show up in yoga pants and painted nails and instead I get this ghost of a boy wearing more black that I did at my sister's funeral. You've got to warn a gal." She explained.

"Is it a bad thing?" Roman was confused.

"No, not even a little. If I was 30 years younger and you were straight I'd take you home and gobble you up myself." She said. Roman sighed and watched Virgil blush and cover his face, "Awe, he's shy. Roman, this one's good. I like him."

"I do too." Roman smiled and kissed his cheek. Virgil just blushed harder. Rose and Phil walked in the room and grinned. They both came to give Virgil hugs. Rose complimented his outfit and pulled him into the kitchen to introduce him to everyone else. Roman held his hand and walked him around.

His cousin Cay, a little blonde twelve year old wearing a purple shirt that had announced her love for soccer in obnoxious rhinestone writing. Her two twin brothers, Tom and Ollie.

"Tom his named after Tom Brady. Somehow their dad managed to convinced my aunt to name him after his favorite football star without her noticing." Roman explained. Virgil giggled. The twins were eight, and pulling each others hair and clothes as they chased each other around. Their parents, Jeremy and Ella. Ella tried to hide her sneer when she saw Virgil's shirt. It obviously was affecting him, "Don't worry about her. She's narcissistic and looks for any reason she can to hate everyone else in the world."

"That's bitchy." Virgil said.

"She is, but we all deal with it." Roman said with a shrug. Then there was Hope, half Polynesian and the size of a tank. She was a national high school rugby player, and could probably lift a truck if she tried hard enough. But she was so girly and feminine at the same time. She loved shoes, and makeup, and hair, and clothes, and nails. She had a tan leather backpack sitting on one of the chairs. Roman knew she had more than just rugby gear and a bit of makeup. Tucked away at the bottom was the vape she hid from her parents. Halfway through the night she would ask Roman to come hang out and smoke in the car. Her mom was Bianca, her step dad was Matt.

Roman had his own bag that he made sure to keep close to the table while they ate Christmas dinner. But before dinner, it was time to open presents. Gifts were passed around. Rose even got Virgil a few things, some new makeup, a few new pieces of jewelry, little things. Roman handed him the small gift he got, the bigger one hiding away in his bag. The entire Death Note manga series. Virgil grinned and gave him a hug. Virgil loved Death Note, but it was a fact few people knew about. More gifts were passed around and then it was time for dinner.

Roman kept his bag close by, making sure to pick a seat without a table leg too close by and pulled Virgil next to him. He dished small amounts of food, not knowing when he would need to flee. Virgil looked at him funny and Roman just held up a finger. Conversation began civil, and mostly based around Virgil.

"So what did your parents think of you coming over?" Someone asked.

"Dad was totally fine with it actually." Virgil shrugged.

"Wait till you hear what Mom has to say." Someone teased.

"Oh, she's not in the picture." Virgil said as he spooned mashed potatoes into his mouth.

"Oh I'm sorry to hear that."

"It's fine, I've had more than enough time to recover." He said. Roman just stayed out of conversation, listening for someone to say the wrong thing.

"Mom! Ollie put mashed potatoes in my hair!" Cay screamed. Ella sighed and handed her a napkin.

"I need some liquor in me. Someone start pouring wine." Nana demanded. Virgil smiled.

"I like your Nana, she's cool." Virgil said quietly to Roman.

"She's from Brooklyn, so she has absolutely no filter at all." Roman said.

"Hadn't noticed." Virgil said. Roman had just finished his food when the first snark remark started. He pulled out his phone and texted Virgil.

_Follow me_

Virgil looked at him and shrugged in confusion. Roman waited a little longer for people to start yelling and fighting with each other. Under the cover of everyone shouting at each other, Roman moved his chair back just a enough to slide under the table. He tapped Virgil's thigh and gestured for him to follow. The tablecloth and the solid wood of the table dampened the sound enough that they could talk without shouting. Virgil crawled under the table with him while Roman pulled his bag out from under his chair. He opened it up and handed Virgil a little bag of chips.

"What are we doing under your table?" Virgil asked, "And why are you so prepared?"

"Because this happens every family gathering without fail. My family's a fucking disaster. Once my aunt Ella went home with a black eye." Roman said with a shrug. Virgil laughed, "Eventually I just started bringing my own food and hiding under the table till things died down."

"You're so weird." Virgil said with a smile. Roman grinned and kissed him.

"I may have a second gift for you too." Roman said. He dug around in his bag and pulled out the little box.

"What is it?" Virgil asked.

"If I tell you there'd be no point." Roman said. Virgil carefully tore the wrapping paper off the little Velvet box.

"Roman? What did you get me?" Virgil looked like he was getting excited and didn't want to be.

"Open it and find out." Roman said. His heart raced. Virgil opened the box and looked back up at Roman.

"You got me a ring." He smiled at him.

"It's a promise ring. I love you so much, and I want to tell that to the entire world. I want to have our party after the courthouse wedding. I want to sweep you off your feet and show you how much I love you. But we can't get married yet. We're young, and we're stupid, and it won't work in the long run. So instead, I gave you a promise ring to tell you that I want to marry you but not now. So, I promise I'll protect you. I promise I'll take care of you. I promise I'll love you. I promise I'll hold you. I promise I'll keep you safe. I promise I'll help you. I promise I'll stay with you. I promise I'll do my best. I promise I'll treat you like the princess you are and the kitten you are in your heart. I promise that in this moment, right now, I hope you get rid of this ring because I hope it'll be replaced with a wedding ring." Roman told him. Virgil sniffled and wiped his eyes.

"I wouldn't have worn eyeliner if I'd known you'd be giving me a speech like that. I love you so much, Roman." He said. Roman took the box from Virgil and held his right hand. He carefully slipped the braided metal band around his ring finger. Virgil hugged him and covered his face in kisses. Roman grabbed his cheeks and kissed him. They snuggled up together under the table, the sound of yelling surrounding their little bubble of peace. Virgil was crying. But he was also smiling, so it was okay. Roman just kept kissing him. He ran his fingers through his thick purple hair and moved him to sit in his lap. Virgil nuzzled against his neck.


	49. Logan

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas Day Part 2

Patton had come to pick Logan up and take him to his mom's house. He hated family gatherings. And one could figure out why as soon as he walked in the door. Logan was greated by his cousin Stacy, and her boyfriend, Gavin. Logan hated Gavin, but he didn't always. He was nice when they'd first met, now he was not so nice.

"What's up, Logan? The game's on, you should come watch. Oh wait, forgot, you play for the other team." He flung an arm around Logan's shoulder and laughed, "I'm just kidding. This your boyfriend?"

"Yes, it is. His name is Patton." Logan said, trying to grab his hand while being restrained by Gavin.

"Hi, Patton. I'm Gavin." He hsnd out his hand while he held Logan in a headlock. Logan pushed against him until Gavin finally let him go, "Who's your team?"

"Oh, sorry. I don't really watch sports." Patton shrugged.

"How do you guys even call yourselves men? Probably too busy butt fucking to do anything else." He scoffed. Logan crossed his arms in discomfort. Patton just blinked. Logan could see the urge to destroy this man burning in Patton's eyes. And then Patton did something completely out of character. The let his face contort into fake concern and placed a hand on Gavin's shoulder.

"It's okay. Not everyone can be out and proud. Soon you'll be able to bring your trans drag queen boyfriend to family dinner. I'm sure of it." Then he walked right past him and held Logan's hand. Logan just blinked at him, his jaw on the floor. Gavin just turned and walked away. Stacy came up to Logan and apologized for Gavin's behavior.

"He's been acting especially cocky the past few days. Do you happen to have any idea why?" She asked. Logan looked over at Gavin. There was a square shaped lump in his pocket, and he was snickering to Stacy's parents.

"He's proposing to you at dinner." Logan said.

"Oh fuck. I was going to break up with him." Stacy bit her lips.

"Okay, so wait till he's down on one knee and then tell him you want to break up." Logan told her.

"Brutal, but I'm into it. Signal me when he's getting close." She said and walked away.

"What?" Patton asked quietly.

"Stacy knows I can read people well, so she asks me for help with Gavin." Logan shrugged.

"Is he always like that to you?" Patton looked worried.

"Pretty much. He's just pissed that he liked it when I sucked him off after he started dating my cousin." Logan said.

"Why did you do that?" Patton shook his head.

"Because I could and he was a homophobic asshole." Logan said, "I wanted to prove him wrong."

His mom was in the kitchen, Logan went to go see her. He brought Patton along with him.

"So this is who you've been seeing?" His mom asked. She wiped her hands on a towel and held her hand out. Patton shook her hand and grinned.

"I'm Patton." He said.

"Pleasure." She said without mentioning her name. She called for Valerie to come help her, "So, Patton, what do you do for work?"

"Pediatric nurse. I like working with kids." He told her. She nodded.

"Do you think you'll ever adopt?" His mom asked.

"Actually, I already have a 17 year old." He said.

"Oh, and I assume he's adopted." Logan's mom said.

"No, he's mine." Patton said.

"So you didn't know you were gay until recently?"

"I'm pan. I like girls too." Patton explained. Logan took a deep breath and grabbed the open bottle of wine of the counter. He drank more than he probably should have straight from the bottle and set it back down. He'd need the alcohol tonight. Patton snuck up behind him.

"I hate my family." He told him.

"Just a little bit longer, baby. Then we can go snuggle and read stories with your penguin, okay?" Patton whispered in his daddy voice. Logan pouted.

"Okay." Logan said.

"And don't drink so much of the grown ups' drinks, they'll make you sick." He moved the wine bottle farther away from him.

"Okay." Logan nodded.

"Good little boy. Daddy loves you lots." He said then backed away before anyone noticed.

Soon they all sat down to eat. Logan looked up at Patton for permission whenever he wanted more of something alcoholic. When Patton started saying no, he switched to just water. Everyone was staring knowingly at Stacy and trying not to give away the surprise. Logan saw Gavin shift in his seat and reach for his pocket. Logan tapped on the table in front of Stacy. She tapped back. Gavin stood up and announced he had a surprise for her.

"I think that a time has come for our relationship to grow a little more. I love you Stacy," He got down on one knee and opened the ring box, "Will you marry me?"

"Oh, Gavin. I'm flattered, but I have a surprise for you too. I'm dumping you." She bat her eyelashes. Gavin blinked, Logan giggled. They left the table and Logan heard muffled yelling from the other room before Gavin stormed out the door. Stacy sat back down, looking very pleased with herself, and dinner continued as if nothing had happened.

The couple left just a little bit later after telling everyone goodbye and Logan hugging his cousins.

"What do you want to do when we get back?" Patton asked in the car. Logan shrugged, "We could read stories, we could watch Christmas movies, whatever you'd like."

"Want paci and nap." Logan pouted.

"Then let's go get your paci and I'll read you bedtime stories." Patton promised. Logan wanted cuddles and loves, but he had to wait till he was home. They pulled into the driveway and Patton helped Logan out of the car before grabbing a big present for Logan. He handed it to him and picked him up. He carried him inside and set him gently on the couch.

"Can I open it?" Logan asked. Patton nodded. Logan tore off the paper and opened the box.

"Got you lots of new things." Patton smiled. Sippy cups, pacifiers, pajamas, stuffies, storybooks, and a box to keep it all in, all sitting inside. Logan bounced happily and held him arms out for a hug. Patton moved the box and scooped him up in a hug.

"Thank you, Daddy. I love you." He said with a smile.

"I love you too, baby. We got to get you ready for bed." He picked Logan back up and carried him to the bathroom. He gave Logan a quick bath and wrapped him up in a towel. Logan handed him one of his new pairs of pajamas, the dinosaur onesie. Patton helped him put it on and took him back to the bathroom to help brush his teeth. He set him in his bed and pulled out of the new books. He wrapped his arms around Logan and put a pacifier in his mouth. Logan fell asleep warm and happy after Christmas for the first time in years. Normally he was drunk and depressed by the time he passed out on his bed. This year, he had Patton holding him and reading him stories until he fell asleep. It was a nice change, a good change, a change Logan hoped wasn't temporary.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus concludes the 12 Day of Christmas! I did it guys. I made it through all 12 days.


	50. Virgil

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Road trip bonding.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to do my best to start uploading on Tuesdays and Thursdays until I finish this out. I'm going to end this pretty soon I think, but I may write a sequel if you guys are interested. I just feel like this in particular in going on long enough and it should be wrapped up soon. But I have more ideas so I think the sequel will just finish out the school year + a maybe epilouge. Let me know if you're interested.

They'd packed up the car for their trip. It was a six hour drive normally, but with the icy roads and jammed up highways it took longer than expected. It was late now. Roman had fallen asleep a while ago, propped up against the side of the door. Virgil leaned over to relax on him and mess around on his phone. He noticed his dad's driving get a little worse, a little less cautious.

"Everything okay?" Virgil asked him.

"He's tired." Logan said.

"I'm fine. Promise." Patton told everyone.

"No you're not. We need to make a stop in a few miles for gas. I'm taking over then." Virgil insisted.

"Just stay back there. I'll be okay" He argued.

"Nope. This isn't a request." Virgil told him. When they did stop, Virgil got out of the car and held out his hand for the keys. Patton bowed his head and let him take them. He climbed in the backseat.

"Make sure you watch him Logan." Patton said as he climbed in the backseat. He looked like he wanted to say more, but Logan just wanted him to sleep.

"Patton, relax. I can pay attention to him. Just go to sleep." Logan told him. Patton pouted, and fell asleep in 10 minutes, "I can drive you know."

"It's fine. I really like driving actually. It's sort of relaxing." Virgil shrugged.

"But Roman always drives you everywhere. I assumed it was because you didn't like driving." Logan said. 

"He has a very traditional way of thinking. He pays for everything, he drives me everywhere, he helps me down steps, he loves to flatter, he picks me up at my house, having Dad like him is very important, he holds the door open for me. You know, that kind of thing. It used to bother me a lot because I felt like I wasn't pulling my weight. And then I realized be genuinely just likes being a good, chivalrous, boyfriend. I drive every chance I get though." Virgil explained. He loved him a lot, but he had a lot of annoying little habits that made him a perfect gentleman.

"How did you even end up together? I'm blown away." Logan said.

"That's a really good question." Virgil had no idea why they ended up working so well together. But they did, and Virgil was always happy about it.

"You balance each other well. You help him quiet down a little, he helps you come out of your shell a little. He let's you fantasize and you keep him grounded in reality. And he adores you so much." Logan said.

"I know. He really does. You know, when he found out about the-" Virgil gestures to his arm, "He told me that he was mad at himself because he didn't give me enough support."

"Must be nice. My friend found me in the bathroom and cried for twenty minutes about how I should think about how others feel and maybe I shouldn't be so selfish." Logan said. Virgil bit his lips, "You're dad loves you so much. Weird topic change, but you're all he talks about. He comes over and just worries. Are you okay? Are you doing well? How do you feel? Could he have done better? The only thing he wants is for you to be happy and safe. He doesn't care about anything you do, as long as you have a good time with it."

"I'm so happy I got him as my dad." Virgil said with a smile.

"When I told him you were gay, the first thing out of his mouth was whether I brought him on because you were getting bullied. I told him you had a boyfriend and he just wanted to know if he was good to you." Logan told him.

"I told you, he wouldn't say a single bad word. I'd just heard too many stories and I'm afraid of confrontation. I could've gotten stuck with so much worse. I could've gotten stuck with Emily." Virgil laughed to himself.

"You call her Emily?"

"What else would I call her? Mom? She's not my mom." Virgil shook his head.

"Do you remember anything about her?" Logan asked. Virgil shook his head?

"Not even what she looked like." Virgil said. Was she blonde? Or did she have dark hair like Virgil's? Blue eyes? Brown eyes? Green eyes? Did she have freckles like Virgil did? Was she pretty?

"Makes sense. Patton probably doesn't keep any pictures of her around." Logan said.

"He has some old videos and stuff. I haven't watched them, but I know they're there. I think he sent them to Auntie Em to get them converted." Virgil said.

"I don't know anything about this Auntie Em. What's she like?" Logan asked.

"She's really loud and kind of obnoxious. She swears too much, she drinks too much, she doesn't care about anyone or anything. I love her so much." Virgil giggled.

"She sounds terrible and I'm excited to meet her." Logan smiled, "Turn on some music. I don't like the silence."

"I'm driving, you can though." Virgil said, "I have a playlist you can pick something from that."

Logan pulled out the phone and scrolled through Virgil's playlist.

"I haven't listened to any of this stuff in years. Why does Fall Out Boy have so much new stuff? I thought they broke up in 2010." Logan said.

"They got back together in 2013." Virgil explained briefly.

"Oh, yeah I'd stopped listening to them at that point. I graduated in 2012, that's when I decided I needed to grow up a little bit. I took out my piercings, bought new clothes, cut my hair shorter, you know, adult things." He said.

"You had piercings?" Virgil asked. His teacher and his dad's boyfriend had piercings.

"I have three tattoos, of course I had piercings." Logan shrugged.

"You have three tattoos? Why am I just learning this?" Virgil felt his brain short circuiting. Logan had tattoos. That was so unlike him, "Does dad know?"

"We've been dating for however long and you don't think he's seen my collarbone yet? Because if you seriously think that then you're wrong." Logan said. He turned on some quiet music so they could still talk.

"What do you have tattooed to your collar bone?" Virgil asked.

"Solar system. I have the golden ratio spiral on my hip bone and the phases of the moon down my thigh." Logan said, "I want to get another one but I don't know what yet. I'm thinking some more sacred geometry since it looks cool."

"What's sacred geometry?" Virgil asked.

"Patterns that supposedly the entire universe is built on. Fractals, golden ratio, flower of life, stuff like that. Metatron's cube is my favorite one." Logan said.

"So get that one. If it's your favorite then get it." Virgil told him. He didn't quite know why he was helping Logan pick out a tattoo, but he was now.

"Okay." Logan shrugged, "Weird question, do you want tattoos?"

"I think I want some to cover up some of my scars. Not all of them, but some of them. At least the one's I have on my arms." He said, "It would be nice to wear shirt sleeves without hiding my arms the whole time."

"What do you want to get?" Logan asked.

"Haven't gotten that far yet. I like the designs with a lot if line work and not much shading." Virgil said.

"Get something that you like looking at. It doesn't really have to be symbolic or anything, just pick something pretty." Logan told him. Virgil thought.

"Would it be weird if I got a fictional character tattoo? I feel like that sounds tacky." Virgil said.

"As long as it's not something you won't care for in two years I say go for it." Logan told him.

"What if I got Morticia Addams to cover up scars? Or a vase of her cut up roses?" Virgil thought out loud.

"I'd go with a vase. Morticia has a lot of black, so it would hurt to fill in. But it's up to you." Logan said.

"I'll think about it." He shrugged. He still had a few months before he could even get a tattoo, he had time to think. The pair continued to talk until they pulled into town. Logan woke the two up in the backseat and they pulled up to Auntie Em's house.


	51. Patton

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Auntie Em

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At the end there's some sexy talk. It's marked as usual if you want to skip over it.

Finally, they had arrived. Emma stepped outside and greeted them. There she stood with her deep red hair that was very obviously from a bottle, her tank top with a safety pin holding together one of the straps, her neon pink bra clearly visible beneath it, and a pair of boxers on. 

"What up, fuckers." She grinned. Patton smiled and hugged her. He missed her so much. They brought bags in and Emma helped them to their rooms, "I figured two would be enough. One for Papa Pat and his boy toy and one for Virgil and his fuck buddy. Or rearrange, I don't give a shit."

"No, that'll work. Where's your kids?" Patton asked.

"Slut number one is at a friend's house, slut number two is at cheer, and Liam's across the street. He'll be here with the asshole is like ten minutes probably." She explained with a shrug, "Go get settled and I'll mix drinks. Gotta meet these two new bitches and catch up with the old ones."

"Did she just call her kids sluts?" Logan asked once they were alone in their room.

"Yeah, but she loves them. She doesn't act like it, but she will stand by her kids till the sun explodes." Patton said, "I love her so much."

They rejoined in the kitchen and Emily sat on the island drinking vodka with skittles floating in it.

"It's 11 in the morning." Logan pointed out.

"And your point is?" She asked.

"I guess I don't have one." He shrugged.

"First off, house rules. Do whatever the hell you want, just don't touch my fucking vodka." She said, "Now you're Logan I think. You're Patton's boyfriend tell me about yourself."

"I'm a teacher, I'm-"

"No, the stuff I actually care about. Patton said there's an age gap, how big? Big enough to be kinky? What's your favorite musical? What are your thoughts on Coraline? Do you like Lucille?" She pointed to a doll sitting in a corner. She was an old woman with neon jewelry and a bright yellow dress. Logan looked a little shocked. Patton probably should have warned him in advance, oh well.

"Well I'm 28 and he's 36, so that's an eight year difference. I don't really know what constitutes a kinky age gap." Logan shrugged. 

"When you break the age rule. You divide your age in half and add six that's the minimum age you're allowed to date at. Patton's at 24 right now, so not kinky." Emma explained.

"Okay, I haven't seen a lot of musicals, but I have seen Newsies and I liked it so I guess that." Logan scratched the back of his head.

"That will fucking changes. Moulin Rouge, Burlesque, Singing in the Rain, Grease, Hairspray, Mamma Mia, Wizard of Oz, it'll be a fucking grand adventure." She sipped her skittle mixture through a silly straw.

"Oh my god! We have to watch Burlesque." Roman squealed with excitement.

"Hell yes! I love Christina Aguilara's Green dress, she's fucking gorgeous." Emma pointed at him.

"And Cher's opening number in the top hat leotard combo, it kills me." Roman said.

"What the fuck is Burlesque?" Virgil asked.

"It's a musical about Cher and Christina Aguilara dancing around in glittery lingerie and its super cute and gay and also Christina Aguilara has a sugar daddy in it but he's evil because he's trying to steal her from her true love who also happens to be engaged." Roman said. Virgil just blinked at him. Emma and Roman continued talking about musicals while Logan and Patton snuck away back to their room.

Patton kissed him and pushed him down onto the bed. He nuzzled against his chest and purred quietly. Logan ran his fingers through his hair. Finally they were alone. Patton continued to kiss him. Nothing really progressed, they were content enjoying each other's company.

"How do you know Emma anyway? She seems like the last person you'd ever want to be affiliated with." Logan asked.

"Her husband is a good family friend, I've known him my entire life. His first wife was insane, and her first husband was abusive. The two daughters are from their first marriages, Liam is both of theirs. I was so happy when they started dating." Patton explained.

"What does her husband do?" Logan asked.

"He's a jeweler." Patton said. Emma opened the door and peaked her head in.

"Oh fuck ya'll are having a snuggle party. Anyway, is it cool if I give the kids alcohol. Virgil said I had to ask your permission first. He's got a fucking stick up his ass." Emma rolled her eyes. Patton shrugged.

"As long as you don't get them drunk and they actually want to drink. Roman's not allowed to tell his parents." He said.

"Hell yeah." Emma grinned as she left the room, "Party's back on, bitches."

"You're letting your 17 year old drink?" Logan asked.

"If he wants to. He's surrounded by responsible adults who can keep him from going over his limit. It's vacation, so I care a lot less. And don't tell me you never drank underaged." Patton said.

"I guess. I really shouldn't have gotten drunk though. It lead to bad decisions." Logan shook his head. Patton rolled the pair over so that Logan was straddling his waist. He gently rubbed Logan's chest, smiling as he did. 

*

"Can I ask you a question?" Patton said. He carefully sat up so they could be at eye level with each other.

"Go ahead." Logan wrapped his arms around his neck.

"Well, we've been dating for a few months now and we've never really discussed fantasies with each other. It's kind of weird, but I want to know." Patton said. Logan blushed.

"Like sex?"

"Yes like sex." Patton giggled and kissed him.

"Your's is probably more interesting than mine. I'm new to the really kinky stuff." Logan said with a shrug.

"So that means you can tell me all the little details and it won't be weird to me. You probably wouldn't be up for mine anyway." Patton held his waist.

"I'll tell you mine if you tell me your's." Logan said.

"You first." Patton leaned back so he was resting against the headboard.

"I want to wear lingerie really bad. Like a corset, and stockings, and a garter belt, and heels. And I kind of want to get spanked." Logan shifted on his lap.

"Like spanked with a hand, or spanked with a belt, or paddled, I want specifics." Patton urged.

"I don't really know. I haven't tried enough to know my limits." Logan admitted.

"I can help you find your limits, you know? Just give me the word and I'll do anything you want me to do to you." Patton said. Logan blushed and covered his face. Patton kissed his knuckles covering his nose.

"Your turn." Logan muttered.

"If you get flustered at the thought of being spanked with a belt, this is going to be a ride for you. I'll leave out other little unrelated kinks I want to try and just go for the big one." Patton said. Logan nodded, "I want to tie their ankles to their thighs so they're all spread out for me. I want their hands tied behind their back and a collar on them. Something cute, I don't know exactly though. I want them drooling around a ball gag and trying to make noises. I want to beat them until they're bruised and shaking. After I'm finished, I want to plug them up and leave them until I can do the whole thing over again all day long. Maybe I could make their belly start to swell just a tiny bit."

About halfway through his story, Logan buried his face in Patton's shoulder, his knees shook.

"Daddy." He muttered.

"Yes, baby?" Patton asked.

"I need to play." He looked up at Patton and bat his eyelashes. Patton chuckled.

"Do you want to experiment?" Patton combed through his hair.

"Yes, Daddy." Logan said.

Patton kissed him, "Remember that you have to tell Daddy if you don't like something."

"Yes, Daddy." Logan promised.

"Good boy. Now stand up and lock the door for us." Patton said. Logan crawled away and locked the door, "Did you bring your paci?"

"Yes, Daddy." Logan pulled it out of his bag and put it in his mouth. Patton sat on the edge of the bed and pulled Logan closer. He undid his pants and slid them down to his knees before draping him across his lap. Logan made sure his ass was way up in the air for him. Patton lightly smacked him.

"How did that feel?" He asked.

"Harder." Logan said around his pacifier. Patton hit harder. Logan let out a whimper, "Harder."

Patton hit him as hard as he could. Logan moaned as a bright red handprint blossomed on his ass. He hissed as Patton ran his nails across the sensitive skin.

"Was that too hard, baby boy?" Patton asked. Logan shook his head.

"Hurts, but good." He said around the rubber in his mouth, "Will Auntie Em get mad?"

"No, she doesn't care. Can I keep going?" Patton asked. Logan nodded.

"Belt?" He asked.

"Can you handle that? It hurts a lot." He said. Logan nodded again.

"I wanna try." He said. Patton moved him so he was bent over the side of the bed and Patton stood behind him. He unbuckled his belt and folded it up. Logan squirmed before the leather landed harshly on his skin. Logan yelped and winced through his teeth.

"Are you okay?" Patton gently stroked his hair. He really didn't want to push his into anything he didn't want to do. Logan nodded.

"More." He said. Patton hit him again, Logan's screams turned into moans. His beautiful, round ass rippled with each strike. Patton could feel his pants tighten.

"Baby boy, I need to fuck you so bad," He felt himself needing to dominate, to hurt, to take what he deserved, "So unless you tell me to stop, I'm going to spank you till you're purple and then fuck you until you scream."

"Please." Was all Logan had to say.


End file.
